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I'd like to have kids some day. I have to say, the thought makes me all fuzzy feeling. Although, it's kind of tiring! I had to fight with the little lady this morning to get her tights on. But she's so cute. When you say "how do you do" she comes over to shake your hand.

Dammit, I never get this broody. Maybe I'll just get a cat and live the spinsta life.
 
Sloths are too much like hard work. I want a slime mould. Now that's the pet that keeps on giving.

Also, Bert: I never talk shit. Excrement, faeces, coprolites, dung, scat - all fair game on occasion. But not shit. I'm deeply hurt...:)
 
Okay. Cat it is. Possibly dog.

She started screaming about an hour ago. My head hurts. Teething babies= hard work. But still, I guess it's a nice distraction.
 
You need one of these, Ms. Serpentine. Every young mother I know swears by them, and they work a wonder with our Mini-Me. Goodness only knows why.
 
Yeah she's gone for a nap now. We just sorted through all her old baby clothes, did all the dishes, put away all the toys and now her mummy and me are lying on the sofa watching 'Enchanted'.
 
DesEsseintes said:
Also, Bert: I never talk shit. Excrement, faeces, coprolites, dung, scat - all fair game on occasion. But not shit. I'm deeply hurt...:)
Click to expand...

So how should I have phrased "Des' isn't talking shit" to make it any clearer than it was?

We're not having a Jean Paul Sartre moment here are we? You know the one...

"Give me coffee, no cream"

"I'm so sorry Monsieur Sartre - We've run out of cream - will no milk do?"

:D
 
Bert_Fegg said:
So how should I have phrased "Des' isn't talking shit" to make it any clearer than it was?

We're not having a Jean Paul Sartre moment here are we? You know the one...

"Give me coffee, no cream"

"I'm so sorry Monsieur Sartre - We've run out of cream - will no milk do?"

:D
Click to expand...

It was your use of the word 'here', implying that at some other point I might have been talking shit, that so deeply offended me to my very core. But I like the Sartre quote, so all is forgiven.
 
DesEsseintes said:
It was your use of the word 'here', implying that at some other point I might have been talking shit, that so deeply offended me to my very core. But I like the Sartre quote, so all is forgiven.
Click to expand...

Cool - but I should point out that in the phrase deeply offended me to my very core The word "deeply" is redundant, since "to my very core" is about as deep as you can go...
 
Bert_Fegg said:
Cool - but I should point out that in the phrase deeply offended me to my very core The word "deeply" is redundant, since "to my very core" is about as deep as you can go...
Click to expand...

On the contrary, I long ago placed my own core at the heart of a distant star for my own protection. I am therefore doubly surprised that your offence managed to outpace light itself in order to penetrate its defences.
 
DesEsseintes said:
On the contrary, I long ago placed my own core at the heart of a distant star for my own protection. I am therefore doubly surprised that your offence managed to outpace light itself in order to penetrate its defences.
Click to expand...

so - you have the power to place the core of your being inside a star but you still get offended if a sentence isn't phrased to your liking....

You are Jehovah and I claim my £5-00
 
Bert_Fegg said:
so - you have the power to place the core of your being inside a star but you still get offended if a sentence isn't phrased to your liking....

You are Jehovah and I claim my £5-00
Click to expand...


Damn it. How did you discover me?

<Grumbles, fishing about in ancient leather purse.>

How many shekels to the pound again?
 
DesEsseintes said:
Damn it. How did you discover me?

<Grumbles, fishing about in ancient leather purse.>

How many shekels to the pound again?
Click to expand...

well - since you were basically describing a horcrux it was a toss up between Jehovah and Lord Voldemort - Lucky guess really...
 
It's easy to confuse the two, that's true. One is a mass-murdering psychopath obsessed with purity...and the other's a character in Harry Potter.

Badoom-tish! I'm here all week; try the veal.
 
DesEsseintes said:
It's easy to confuse the two, that's true. One is a mass-murdering psychopath obsessed with purity...and the other's a character in Harry Potter.

Badoom-tish! I'm here all week; try the veal.
Click to expand...

I love it when a gag comes together :)

I was surprised to find out that you only have to slot four people to qualify as a mass murderer - admittedly they all have to be done in close succession or else it's serial killing - but four?
 
:heart: This thread! I've been reading all the new posts since last I was here, and I've been giggling and snorting as I've read your posts. :D

Ees muy muy fon!
 
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