Tap That Axe: Axe House and Taproom

[LitShark]

-Peeks in to find another place of water references-
Not quite the same as my Treehouse, but the water tends to draw me.
-Notices his pile of drinks and mixables-
Perhaps you would have a use for these, Mister Shark.
-Offers up a few of the thousand coconuts deposited at her Treehouse-
I've resorted to Gilligan's Island methods to use up the fuzzy things. Unfortunately, there are some uses that they just do not conform to.

Hello and welcome, Polly. I knew I wouldn't regret flooding the pool. I feel like I remember you from before my vanishing act, but my brain might be inventing that. Thanks for the coconuts, I'm sure we'll put them to good use. I'll have to stop by the treehouse some time.

 

[LitShark]

Focus!

*Smashes his TV in with a hammer and converts into a book shelf.*

I've got to make a "list" of all projects currently beginning or imagined for my internet class.

Then I've got a BOAT to catch.

Then I gotta rewrite Shakespearean dialogue with modern themes and setting.

Then I gotta read at least Act I of R&J.

Distractions Vani- ... *Email from teacher, due dates pushed to next week due to lack of internet savvy on the part of others.*

*Turns the TV back on.*

Something about a BOAT?

 

[LitShark]

2 things.

*watches the chaos erupt from the bar and giggles*

Cloudy with a chance of brainstorm... will there be lightening at least? I love a good storm.

*rescues the vodka and a glass and helps herself, sipping thoughtfully*

Settings, settings, settings... If I can't have both, I think the latter. But gritty realism that melds into twisted romance is appealing.

One.

Two

Lightning in a Bottle

What the French call a certain,
"I don't know what."
When you can't
"Hit the Nail on the Head."

I'm desperately reaching...
out into the Void,
Trying not to
Pull a Stump Back.

I don't want it to be "Right on the Nose,"
so I'll keep it to the Grindstone.
As certain as the Sun, rising in the East;
Inspiration hovers just above Rock Bottom.

Fuck you! I'm a goddamn Artist.
Holding it Together, while I'm Falling Apart-
Watch me sullenly, savagely, self-Destruct.
It's worth the Cost to get In.

My comfort zone is
CRISIS!
There's no place quite like
home.

My authentic voice is:
A Cry For Help.
My Mood Ring just says-
Feelings.

There is a storm cloud hovering o'er my head.
My Days- sand slipping through a Glass.
Rain falling down like Tears on my face,
Don't hold your breath-Lightning ne'er strikes twice.

If you're not Suffering,
then you simply aren't Feeling.
Every once in a while, the Tail wags the dog.
A Quixotic, Windmill~ "Lightning in a Bottle"!

Sometimes, it's as simple as that.

 

[LitShark]

Notes on "Haters" from Taoism:
As read by The Wu Tang Clan.

RZA: Long, long ago. In Ancient Feudal China- A great Emperor planned a visit to the ghetto. The folks of the ghetto- they was mad hyped to have the Emperor, so they went through this big ass transformation, revitalizing they neighborhood, reopening shops an' all 'dat fly shit.

Method Man: The boss man, he sent out an envoy, right? Envoy was like MAD impressed, he said that the Emperor's visit was going to totally change da hood. They was goin' make it rain! They even wanted to build a shrine to the Emperor on this old abandoned lot, where there was an old shitty well. If the folks could fill the well in, in time for Emperial Masons to mount up a proper Shrine piece, The Emperor himself would pay them mad, mad stacks. Not to mention all the people who came to see the Boss bless his shrine.

Red Man: The Hood rallied together! They got this old, wise, strong ass jackass to start hauling dirt, bricks and debris from the big cleanup and carring it back to dump in the well.

RZA: But the Jackass got too high on his own importance, forgot to stay humble. He was just a jackass afterall. He walked all close to the well with a heavy load, and he fell his Jack ass in that muh'fucka.

Method Man: The Folks, they pondered the problem. To help the Jackass up out of the well would take days, fuck up all the strategies. Fuck up all the plans. Fuck up the Shrine and fuck up their rejuvenation efforts. They couldn't let that shit happen. The Jackass wasn't worth much, nowhere near what the Boss man could pay. He'd worked hard on the well, but he was just a Jackass after all.

RZA: So the folks decided to cut they losses. Cash rules everything around me. The Jackass screamed and whined. He pleaded and begged. He kick, he spit, he cursed they mothers. But the people didn't give a shit. They carried the dirt, the rocks, the bricks, all that shit in wheelbarrows, and just dumped it down on top of the Jackass. After a few days of that shit, the screams stopped.

Ol' Dirty Bastard (RIP): All the people! They thought, "He Dead!" So they kept on shoveling dirt down. Then, right before the Emperor arrived, the Jackass hopped his Jack Ass up outa the hole and looked at all the people. After a while, he stopped screaming an' started shaking all that shit that fell in on him off. When it fell off him, he stomped it down, hard as he could! He stomped it, an' stomped it, an' stomped it! An' he built his way out. He took a big Jackass shit in the shallow hole and kicked dirt after it, walking out of the ghetto forever.

RZA: In other words. What doesn't kill you, gets you one step closer to rising above it.

 

[SilentMelody]

One.

Two

Lightning in a Bottle

My authentic voice is:
A Cry For Help.
My Mood Ring just says-
Feelings.

There is a storm cloud hovering o'er my head.
My Days- sand slipping through a Glass.
Rain falling down like Tears on my face,
Don't hold your breath-Lightning ne'er strikes twice.

You are terribly beautiful. I hope you see it.

Thank you for the thread, I'm going to try to re-read Othello today to see what of the subtleties I can absorb. For some reason Othello is acceptable work lunch hour reading, but Lit isn't.

 

[PollySays]

Hello and welcome, Polly. I knew I wouldn't regret flooding the pool. I feel like I remember you from before my vanishing act, but my brain might be inventing that. Thanks for the coconuts, I'm sure we'll put them to good use. I'll have to stop by the treehouse some time.

Premonitions, then, Mister Shark.

 

[LitShark]

I'm glad to have met you Mel. Polly, here's to the future.

Coming Soon, to a Message board near you...

Reserve your role, today!

 

[LitShark]

Invites sent, roles filling up.

Ask for details... go on. Ask.

You have all the weapons you need.

 

[LitShark]

Lazarus Risen

I don't know what's kicking my ass more these days, school or life...

I'm working on getting caught up. Cheerleaders welcome.

 

[Faux_Pas]

*Sneaks in to toss a nice rubber squeaky sharky into his overflowed pool*
His name's Vati.
It lost its squeak.
Sharks shouldn't squeak anyway. Tells where they are. Stupid toy company.

*Continues right on through, looking for her cave*
WHERE THE FUCK AM I?!?

 

[Faux_Pas]

wait...we're playing Suckerpunch?

...
Oh fuck I forgot to send that invite.
I mean, um.
She never got back to me.
Old me. Her. That other one.

I'm Foxy now, you can't blame me for NOTHIN'!

 

[choklatekoneko]

wait...we're playing Suckerpunch?

Is Blondie....

 

[Faux_Pas]

I got the invite...uh...second hand.
But had to say 'no'.
Group threads, for the most part, don't work for me (I dunno...maybe if I gave them more time...). Plus, the role offered made it even more challenging. I can only do that sort of writing if I really connect with whomever I'd doing the scene with.

You owe me a thread. *Nods*

 

[Faux_Pas]

...We've completely hijacked Sharky's place....

*Glances around and contemplates dumping food coloring in his pool*
Though I'm slightly worried on the reprecussions of this.

 

[choklatekoneko]

That movie gave me a sad.
Stunning visually...incredible soundtrack...great action sequences...shitty script.
That last part really wrecked it for me.

nods in agreement.

It was amazing...I got the whole idea of it.

Escaping into a fantasy world.

 

[Faux_Pas]

huhwaitwhat?
How do I then owe you a thread?

That was a random blurt.
I'm sure you'd be used to them from me by now....

 

[Faux_Pas]

I dunno...sounds like something shady if you ask me.

What? Whaat?

Me?!
Never!

 

[Faux_Pas]

makes a mental note to remember that 'owe' remark


smirk

I'm suddenly not sure if I should be grinning or hiding.

 

[LitShark]

totally...but the stuff outside of the fantasy world was SO badly done...

Iz y we'z rewritin' it!

Hoo-ray! I'm a poplar again!

Condensed Vent:
So... the school newspaper pretty much sucks. I got promoted to Page Editor in spite of the fact that I never wanted to be, for a page that nobody else wanted, on a week where every single class wants ten k words or so about this or that (Subjects include "Graphic Novel as Lit", "The Short Film", "Shakes" and "Short Story"), so I go in on Monday to design my A&F page, having stayed up till 2 or so that morning, listening to a local band's indie CD, for a review. I smash on the Page 6 layout, totally reworking the whole title bleed- going full color because it IS a color page, sending emails to get rights to use the band's CD with my review, only to find out that a big ass, paid for ad takes up half the page. So I have to overflow the second half of this book feature article onto page five, which earns me the right to layout page five. All the while, the elderly lady whose the supposed InDesign expert scolds me every time I ask about how to do this thing I never said I would do, then this D-Bag culinary scholar saunters in at 2 every day, giving me shit about "He's always Stealing MY computer." . . . Still gotta write six pages of comparison paper, comparing R&J to A Midsummer Night's Dream. Fantasy Column needs to go up by Thursday... controversy. Okay. /vent

On Sucker Punch: I'm a huge fan of the film, but we're sort of stealing the outline more than rewriting. What appeals to me most... okay, second most; about the film is how imaginative it is. This idea might still be a while in the making, I think I need a Babydoll.

On food coloring: Penalties for coloring the pool include, but are not limited to-

 

[Faux_Pas]

I redirected traffic!!

 

[LitShark]

I redirected traffic!!

Much appreciated. I time leaped Babble, in case you missed it.

I'm in that special- 8 hours of sleep in the past three days kind of place at the moment. Somehow I have to whip my brain into MLA format... This is a welcome distraction.

If anyone could stop traffic, wait- I mean redirect. Nevermind.

 

[LitShark]

It shows it to me... WIP

 

[Faux_Pas]

Whatever you did, it didn't do it.






And-
Great, I'll try to get a post up tonight... at latest, tomorrow morning.

 

[LitShark]

No rush. I'm still swamped, though I knocked all the really horrid work out of the park already. Just have to comment and post on "Stolen Conversation" scenes and somehow encapsulate the NFL lockout into roughly six hundred words...

This weekend though, this weekend I drive up to Ashland Oregon for Shakespeare festival, 25% of my final Shakespeare grade in EC. That's what I'm talking about. I might go into football withdrawl though.

 

[LitShark]

*Collapses in my friendly confines, still decked from head to toe in black and orange from the World Series Champions' Parade, too exhausted for anything more than casual conversation.*

Happy Halloween everybody.