Tihmmnmmish's Very Laid-Back Summery Poolside Threadcast

[miss_trust]

i once worked with a man who asked if i'd be his mistress, offering to set me up in New York City. When i said, "no," and reminded him he was married and i was attached, he was quite confused.

Why is it that some men think it's flattering to say such things? Frankly, it made me feel cheap and as if he thought i was a whore.

Not precisely what Lady experienced, just made me think of it...

 

[LadynStFreknBed]

had a similar experience to that too.. a local, married businessman.. offered to take me to Vegas, buy me a car, give me money, etc if I would have sex with him.. Then, he offered to buy me a house if I would be his mistress. He sent me an email with a very nice house- $350K (which buys a lot in this area and was in a prestigious neighborhood) .. told me it could be mine if I would give him sex whenever he wanted it..

Some women might think I m stupid for not taking him up on that. Here I am living in a house with no kitchen, no working sinks, electrical problems, and many, many cosmetic issues..

Am I stupid? I don't know, but doing something like that would be like giving up on any chance of being happy.

 

[EroticOrogeny]

had a similar experience to that too.. a local, married businessman.. offered to take me to Vegas, buy me a car, give me money, etc if I would have sex with him.. Then, he offered to buy me a house if I would be his mistress. He sent me an email with a very nice house- $350K (which buys a lot in this area and was in a prestigious neighborhood) .. told me it could be mine if I would give him sex whenever he wanted it..

Some women might think I m stupid for not taking him up on that. Here I am living in a house with no kitchen, no working sinks, electrical problems, and many, many cosmetic issues..

Am I stupid? I don't know, but doing something like that would be like giving up on any chance of being happy.

I don't think you're stupid, but smart.
You have to live with yourself all the time.
If casual sex is a part of your lifestyle, then maybe.
But if you reserve sex for someone you care about...
That's how I approach it, so don't condemn all men.

 

[UnderYourSpell]

I was Ron's mistress so does that make me a whore?

 

[LadynStFreknBed]

I don't think you're stupid, but smart.
You have to live with yourself all the time.
If casual sex is a part of your lifestyle, then maybe.
But if you reserve sex for someone you care about...
That's how I approach it, so don't condemn all men.

You're right. I shouldn't be bitching about men in general. I just get frustrated when I tak to men and it turns out they are only interested in sex... and casual sex is not my thing. I've done the friends with benefits thing before when too involved or busy to focus on a relationship, but even in that case, I cared for the guy.

 

[Safe_Bet]

You're right. I shouldn't be bitching about men in general. I just get frustrated when I tak to men and it turns out they are only interested in sex... and casual sex is not my thing. I've done the friends with benefits thing before when too involved or busy to focus on a relationship, but even in that case, I cared for the guy.

There's ALWAYS an alternative *wink, wink!*


Just a quick drive by (post by????) to say "Hi S!"

 

[LadynStFreknBed]

There's ALWAYS an alternative *wink, wink!*


Just a quick drive by (post by????) to say "Hi S!"

Hi, S!

alternatives.. lol
I have my stash of alternatives.

 

[miss_trust]

I was Ron's mistress so does that make me a whore?

hardly - unless you want to be one

the thing about it is he didn't know me one bit - when i say i worked with him, he visited the destination health & wellness resort i worked at & i was the person responsible for his stays (he'd come maybe 2 or 3 times each year for a week or two at a time & we would meet daily because my predecessor said that's how he liked to do things). He wasn't propositioning me as a person because he cared for me, wanted me around, etc. He was making an offer for my body and that's not the kind of relationship i value... if someone else values it, that's great - do whatever makes you happy and fulfills you so long as nobody's being hurt in the process (well, at least not intentionally or repeatedly unless you're into s/m & that's another ball of wax). The other thing with this guy (and most of the guests at that particular property) is that they were generally exceedingly wealthy (CEOs, CFOs & owners of some of the most profitable companies in the world + royalty + celebrities + high-end diplomats) and felt they could buy anything. He didn't give a hoot about my personality, likes, dislikes, or any kind of deeper connection,, he just wanted a pretty thing to fuck & look at over dinner, then toss aside when a better model came along.

i'm not trying to judge everyone's relationships or to say all men are crap - far from it: i love men - but if that's what it sounded like, my bad - was attempting to be concise & commiserate a tad (epic fail).

x12

 

[EroticOrogeny]

I was Ron's mistress so does that make me a whore?

I wouldn't think so, unless you entered the relationship entirely for the material benefits.
And I'm not mandating fidelity - it works for me and her, but others situations may be different.

 

[UnderYourSpell]

Sorry I was having a bad day blame hormones or something. I shouldn't let my miseries spill out and snap at other people oh hell I was upset about something I have no control over and hurting ...... please forgive me

 

[EroticOrogeny]

Sorry I was having a bad day blame hormones or something. I shouldn't let my miseries spill out and snap at other people oh hell I was upset about something I have no control over and hurting ...... please forgive me

Apology accepted, but not required.
I didn't take your latest post as snappish.
These feelings can hit all of us, and our powerlessness over them can just make it worse.
Hope you feel better in the morning after a good night's sleep

 

[hmmnmm]

Bah!
Wasn't gonna look but I looked.


thanks for the comments... I'm with the Miss: should comment more; should be a commenter appreciation day or week or something since they're really the ones with the balls who go so unsung.

 

[UnderYourSpell]

I was weepy for a couple of days with this feeling of impending doom a dread a fear whatever you call it and I was terrified something was going to happen to Ron because I've had these feelings before and been right ...... I was close it's his brother who had cancer a couple of years ago and is back in hospital with a swoollen kidney

 

[LadynStFreknBed]

Okay, ya'll. Everyone say a lil prayer today...
Don't worry. I'm fine. It's not that kind of prayer emergency.

There is this man who I have been talking to for more than 3 years. In fact, one of the first story series that I wrote here was based on conversations we had (the Vegas Road Trip series). He and I love each other, which ya'll might be wondering about since I was recently engaged and unengaged to someone else. LOL

The explanation is rather simple really. He's a geologist. He spends months away from home every year if not all year. The desert and tundra don't come to him, ya know? You guys know how I struggle with depression and PTSD and it just didn't seem possible for me to be with someone who would be gone that much. I just know I could not do that. Even now when he is gone, I feel guilty telling him about my problems when he calls because he can't help and it must be just frustrating cuz I know he would do all he could to help if he was home.

Now, tonight, he told me that he is making plans tomorrow to buy a B&B. He told me how much he loves this place and what work he would do and that he would hire some staff, etc. Anyway, he is really excited about this possibility. And, so am I.. maybe not for the same reasons exactly, but I know he would stay and give up his travels to work the B&B. Which means that all the talk he has done in the past about wanting to marry me could actually be a possibility. Of course, I am not letting myself get too excited because it is only a possibility at this point. He definitely had done his homework and he has spoken to the owner who is desperate to sell by Thanksgiving. (She had been renting the place and is now paying a huge mortgage for a B&B she doesn't want.)

So, please, say a little prayer that the deal goes through. Not only because it will bring he and I together, but because it will make him happy and keep him out of harms way with his job (which I can't really discuss, but it worries me to death sometimes).

 

[UnderYourSpell]

Whooo hoooooo all the best sweetheart for you as well as him ..... you must be so excited and trying not to be! Oh what the hell be excited he's coming home for YOU!! He's realised he could have lost you to someone else he's coming home to claim youuuuu!!

 

[EroticOrogeny]

Lady, you're in my prayers. I hope this comes to fruition for the two of you. Love is not to be neglected, but nourished. good wishes for good times ahead!

 

[UnderYourSpell]

I started a poem entitled 'Marriage is like a cauliflower' then got stuck (well went off it if truth was told) after the first stanza but I will finish it for the title alone

 

[wildsweetone]

I started a poem entitled 'Marriage is like a cauliflower' then got stuck (well went off it if truth was told) after the first stanza but I will finish it for the title alone

this brought to the front centre of my mind an exercise i did during a writing course...

the exercise consisted of getting an onion and studying it hard out for a long time. cut it in half. stare at it some more. see how it is put together, see what holds it in place, see every single minute detail you can about it. use all your senses to get a full perspective of the onion. then on a piece of paper write My Mother Is Like an Onion and say why.

maybe you could try it with the cauliflower. get one, study it closely, how it is put together, what holds it all together, what it feels like, smells like (i suggest a whole raw cauli rather than a cooked portion as that just plain stinks ), etc. then write on a blank page, Marriage is like a cauliflower and state why in as many different ways as you can think of. see how it feels. it's fun. well, i know i enjoyed it.



hope everyone's doing fine.

 

[UnderYourSpell]

this brought to the front centre of my mind an exercise i did during a writing course...

the exercise consisted of getting an onion and studying it hard out for a long time. cut it in half. stare at it some more. see how it is put together, see what holds it in place, see every single minute detail you can about it. use all your senses to get a full perspective of the onion. then on a piece of paper write My Mother Is Like an Onion and say why.

maybe you could try it with the cauliflower. get one, study it closely, how it is put together, what holds it all together, what it feels like, smells like (i suggest a whole raw cauli rather than a cooked portion as that just plain stinks ), etc. then write on a blank page, Marriage is like a cauliflower and state why in as many different ways as you can think of. see how it feels. it's fun. well, i know i enjoyed it.



hope everyone's doing fine.

My mother was like an onion because she made me cry

 

[EroticOrogeny]

My wife liked my carrot metaphor in my thanksgiving poem last year.
Looking forward to your poem - do you like cauliflower or not.
I don't much care for it, but broccoli is OK. These days I need to eat lots of vegetables.

 

[wildsweetone]

My mother was like an onion because she made me cry

awesome! why'd she make you cry?

My wife liked my carrot metaphor in my thanksgiving poem last year.
Looking forward to your poem - do you like cauliflower or not.
I don't much care for it, but broccoli is OK. These days I need to eat lots of vegetables.

i could do so much with a cauliflower... i loathe the stuff cooked. raw it's okay. hmm mother, here i might be coming.

 

[UnderYourSpell]

My wife liked my carrot metaphor in my thanksgiving poem last year.
Looking forward to your poem - do you like cauliflower or not.
I don't much care for it, but broccoli is OK. These days I need to eat lots of vegetables.

Yes I like cauliflower and broccoli, yesterday I picked masses of green beans which are still cropping like mad far too many for us two so had to give some away

awesome! why'd she make you cry?



i could do so much with a cauliflower... i loathe the stuff cooked. raw it's okay. hmm mother, here i might be coming.

Not quite sure WHY she made me cry it's something that's baffled me over the years and I have surmised many reasons. Perhaps she couldn't cope with someone like me because my sisters never got the same treatment, perhaps I was just plain bad who knows. I just know she made a good job of it because it's still haunting me

 

[EroticOrogeny]

The endless heat finally finished off our vegetables. perhaps, with cooler evenings in the offing, the cherry tomatoes will come back.
I know how it is when something from the past just won't go away.

 

[UnderYourSpell]

The endless heat finally finished off our vegetables. perhaps, with cooler evenings in the offing, the cherry tomatoes will come back.
I know how it is when something from the past just won't go away.

Do you know the silly thing is I have huge blanks in my memory of childhood and you think if I was going to forget it would be the bad things but (as far as I know but who can be sure!) it's not. I know people forget things that happened long ago but why did I forget my father had a brother? Its silly things like that I have forgotten not the beatings or mental and sexual abuse. The minds a funny thing and the one counsellor I did see screwed me up even more. What's the point of being told it was never my fault when in my heart of hearts I can't believe it?

 

[UnderYourSpell]

When I think somebody's poetry is a dud I keep my mouth shut and move on as being the polite thing to do ........ but then that's just me I suppose *snuggles under blanky with bashed ego and doesn't write today like I intended*