Variations - Words edition...

[AmberLGreen]

What really makes me so sick
It guys who won’t send a dick pic
We need them it’s true
What is a woman to do
Without an image to help her to flick

 

[Saltfountain]

What really makes me so sick
It guys who won’t send a dick pic
We need them it’s true
What is a woman to do
Without an image to help her to flick

RIP your dms from now on
The tranquility will soon be gone
The lurkers will send
Nasty dick without end
Lesbianism is on...

 

[EvaLane]

Everyone here has such a quick wit
It’s smug and so loud - I admit I feel sick!
With all this talk of cunt and decay
It’s no wonder we’ve been sent here to play
I could use a trim, but I won't send a pic!

 

[AmberLGreen]

RIP your dms from now on
The tranquility will soon be gone
The lurkers will send
Nasty dick without end
Lesbianism is on...

My inbox is always quite bare
Begging so much must just scare
The guys into thinking
My minge must be minging
And it isn’t, so fucking there

 

[Saltfountain]

Everyone here has such a quick wit
It’s smug and so loud - I admit I feel sick!
With all this talk of cunt and decay
It’s no wonder we’ve been sent here to play
I could use a trim, but I won't send a pic!

It's criminal some girls won't share
When it starts to get bushy down there
The sight of the gash
Through the fur makes me splash
Some of us really like hair

 

[Cjbdd]

What to do when your job starts to suck
I have finally run out of luck
Can’t do it no more
I’ll have to be poor
Gonna tell them to go take a fuck

 

[Saltfountain]

What to do when your job starts to suck
I have finally run out of luck
Can’t do it no more
I’ll have to be poor
Gonna tell them to go take a fuck

for the poem
for the subject

 

[EvaLane]

It's criminal some girls won't share
When it starts to get bushy down there
The sight of the gash
Through the fur makes me splash
Some of us really like hair

All of you spout the exact same thing,
“show me the slit, give me that shwinnggg!”
But what of my holes,
you’re scared to pay the tolls?
I’m titled hander-outer, consequence-queeinnggg!

 

[Saltfountain]

All of you spout the exact same thing,
“show me the slit, give me that shwinnggg!”
But what of my holes,
you’re scared to pay the tolls?
I’m titled hander-outer, consequence-queeinnggg!

I hear you bleat 'show me the dick'
But to dish it out you're not too quick
We get out our cocks
But you don't show the box
You're too busy having a flick

 

[EvaLane]

I hear you bleat 'show me the dick'
But to dish it out you're not too quick
We get out our cocks
But you don't show the box
You're too busy having a flick

Touché or touchmé, how ever the Dutch say it.

 

[Saltfountain]

Touché or touchmé, how ever the Dutch say it.

Dutch

 

[Saltfountain]

Touché or touchmé, how ever the Dutch say it.

It's obviously quite a wrench
Brainpower use for this wench
She thinks it's in Dutch
But it's not asking much
To notice it's actually French

 

[ScarletDaisy]

He took his phone into the loo,
Scrolling while he sat for a few.
All I could think --
Eww germs on the sink!
I'm sure he was taking a poo.

 

[EvaLane]

It's obviously quite a wrench
Brainpower use for this wrench WENCH
She thinks it's in Dutch
But it's not asking much
To notice it's actually French

Oh poor Eva, lacking the education
but what’s your excuse, your limitation
Can’t take a joke
Better not choke
Wouldn’t want to tarnish that clever reputation

 

[Saltfountain]

Oh poor Eva, lacking the education
but what’s your excuse, your limitation
Can’t take a joke
Better not choke
Wouldn’t want to tarnish that clever reputation

Intelligence is but a front
With spelling I just take a punt
It's so bad it makes ya
Think I have dyslexia
I really fucking hate autocunt

 

[Saltfountain]

He took his phone into the loo,
Scrolling while he sat for a few.
All I could think --
Eww germs on the sink!
I'm sure he was taking a poo.

Why does he shit in the sink?
It would surely create quite a stink
To shit on the loo
Would be easier too
The stupidity here makes you think...

 

[EvaLane]

I wonder if I could read in the shower
A habit that’d make my mother glower
But I’m nearly thirty
and I’m feeling dirty
The pages should echo my insolent dweller

 

[EvaLane]

I figured out a hack that might sound wack,
snapped pics of the chapters, boom I’m back!
My phone is waterproof,
My book is notter-proof
Temp tricks and loopholes, slickity-slack!

 

[NC_Coastal]

Iambic pentameter ruies
Or so I was taught in the schools
Geoff Chaucer and I
Agreed to decry
As I stood by his crypt among fools

 

[37_ttej]

I know that you are only playing
Though I find myself standing here praying
That one day you'll write
Some verse that's not shite
And be less of a cunty Austrayan

See, that’s what I hate about Brits:
Small-mindedness makes them right twits.
We once were convicts,
So forever depicts
Us as cunts without any wits.

 

[37_ttej]

See, that’s what I hate about Brits:
Small-mindedness makes them right twits.
We once were convicts,
So forever depicts
Us as cunts without any wits.

Of course, he’s not wrong about me.
I’m just a simple Aussie.
It took me all night
To think up that shite
While using a dickshunary dictionary.

 

[37_ttej]

I know that you are only playing
Though I find myself standing here praying
That one day you'll write
Some verse that's not shite
And be less of a cunty Austrayan

We don’t write poems so well?
These Lims are easy as hell.
I’m quite a bit meaner
With a good Sestina
Or challenging Villanelle.

 

[37_ttej]

He posts in the wrong fucking thread
To tell us he’s going to bed
It must be a bitch
To not sleep from the itch
That I cursed and put on his knobhead

@37_ttej

Enough of my bitching and back to the OP about things we hate.
Wait, that’s still bitching ain’t it?
Oh, well …

I don’t like reading at night
As my dreams suffer from blight.
Through visions did flit
This fat, mangy slit!
I haven’t recovered from fright!

 

[Saltfountain]

We don’t write poems so well?
These Lims are easy as hell.
I’m quite a bit meaner
With a good Sestina
Or challenging Villanelle.

I'm sure they will come up in time
As well as forms like Magic 9
I'd place a good bet
That we'll see a nonet
Pretty soon, it's just waiting in line

 

[37_ttej]

What really makes me so sick
It guys who won’t send a dick pic
We need them it’s true
What is a woman to do
Without an image to help her to flick

An ode limerick on failing to send genital imagery

Poor Jett has to compensate
As he’s old and overweight.
Hair getting thinner.
A wee limp wiener.
Instead these poems create.

(maybe a bit too honest there, mate)