PrettyLilPussy19
Space Mermaid 🧜♀️
- Joined
- Aug 13, 2018
- Posts
- 31,240
Overthinking? Me?
I’ve been doing some reflection on some internal prejudices around things within me that I think are “cringe” or “pretentious”. These aren’t things that I think about any one else but for some reason I apply this weird filter to my self perception. Be able to own my nerdiness and my nerd interests without feeling like I should be more self deprecating (I do have a normal and natural state of self deprecation) about it. Like, I love enthusiasm and niche interests in other people. LOVE. Why shouldn’t I love it in myself, without hedging it? If finding someone being unashamedly enthusiastic about something they love makes you feel cringey, then all I can wish is that you find something you love one day.
If you follow my other thread, you’ll know that I’m taking an art appreciation class and, while I didn’t expect it, I am absolutely loving it. And I’m so thankful to the few people who let me ramble about and are curious about it. For some reason, I have this fear of coming off as pretentious about loving art. It’s so dumb. I think pretension is one of the most unattractive qualities to me personally and so I seek to avoid coming off that way but what it actually is is total awe and enthusiasm. I feel like something in my brain has just clicked and while I’ve always liked art - I’ve found a way to “appreciate” art (well named class) in a way that works for my brain. Like am I the kind of person who wants to buy art books now? Yes! Do I want to make it seem like I am smarter or more educated than everyone else? No. Make it obtainable and a natural part of life! No pretension detected. Get over thyself, girl!
Overthinking diatribe complete. Sometimes it helps me firm up my thoughts to jot them down. If you read it, thanks!
I’ve been doing some reflection on some internal prejudices around things within me that I think are “cringe” or “pretentious”. These aren’t things that I think about any one else but for some reason I apply this weird filter to my self perception. Be able to own my nerdiness and my nerd interests without feeling like I should be more self deprecating (I do have a normal and natural state of self deprecation) about it. Like, I love enthusiasm and niche interests in other people. LOVE. Why shouldn’t I love it in myself, without hedging it? If finding someone being unashamedly enthusiastic about something they love makes you feel cringey, then all I can wish is that you find something you love one day.
If you follow my other thread, you’ll know that I’m taking an art appreciation class and, while I didn’t expect it, I am absolutely loving it. And I’m so thankful to the few people who let me ramble about and are curious about it. For some reason, I have this fear of coming off as pretentious about loving art. It’s so dumb. I think pretension is one of the most unattractive qualities to me personally and so I seek to avoid coming off that way but what it actually is is total awe and enthusiasm. I feel like something in my brain has just clicked and while I’ve always liked art - I’ve found a way to “appreciate” art (well named class) in a way that works for my brain. Like am I the kind of person who wants to buy art books now? Yes! Do I want to make it seem like I am smarter or more educated than everyone else? No. Make it obtainable and a natural part of life! No pretension detected. Get over thyself, girl!
Overthinking diatribe complete. Sometimes it helps me firm up my thoughts to jot them down. If you read it, thanks!
Though I am very proud of it.
