What pissed you off today? Mark III

I hate when people basically inform you of what you're going to do for them and then go back later and say, "You sure you don't mind?"

I don't recall you asking in the first place, but whatever.
 
Lol, it was them being foolish. Not on purpose.

I will take yours. You don’t need them, right? I can damage them as much as I like?
 
Cleaning up the woods on our farm. It was used as a dumping ground, and it pisses me off how clueless, careless or just how uncaring people can be to the environment.

Seemingly inexhaustible amount of garbage, trash and junk to remove. There’s are a couple of cool keepers too, but 99% crap.
 
Cleaning up the woods on our farm. It was used as a dumping ground, and it pisses me off how clueless, careless or just how uncaring people can be to the environment.

Seemingly inexhaustible amount of garbage, trash and junk to remove. There’s are a couple of cool keepers too, but 99% crap.

Yeah, people are unbelievable.
My friend’s father who is in his late eighties found several trailer loads of renovation junk that someone had dumped in a remote area of his farm.

It used to be free to go to the city dump as long as you only brought a normal car with trailer or a van load. Lots of small businesses in renovations, hous flippers etc and such used that possibility. Now you get about a free visit per week and I think they are looking for other ”solutions” rather than paying.
 
Yeah, people are unbelievable.
My friend’s father who is in his late eighties found several trailer loads of renovation junk that someone had dumped in a remote area of his farm.

It used to be free to go to the city dump as long as you only brought a normal car with trailer or a van load. Lots of small businesses in renovations, hous flippers etc and such used that possibility. Now you get about a free visit per week and I think they are looking for other ”solutions” rather than paying.
We paid $40 for a pickup truck load. It’s expensive to clean up.
 
We paid $40 for a pickup truck load. It’s expensive to clean up.

Yeah, that is about what it costs here too for private citizens but only after you used up your 26 free visits/ grownup.
We did some demolition work in the basement here, throwing out old junk from renovations, old wood shelves and old damp sheet rock they had used to cover the walls down there and the summer of 2020 we emptied the very full flat of a relative that had passed away.
I’m so glad we still had free visits back then because the amount of loads we hauled there then…😱

We also had the fun experience of driving there in a real big truck (Mr Althea learned to drive those in the military) when helping friends move. It didn’t matter on bit that we just had a couch in there, we had to park outside and carry it in.
 
Less "pissed off" than "frustrated": a while back, a dear friend died unexpectedly. One of the social groups has kept going, but we don't have enough people to do the activities we did. So they want to bring in new people to make up the numbers, but then they don't want to treat them like full members of the group - have them leave events as soon as we don't need the head count any more.

Or that's what the email seemed to be saying; I hope I've misunderstood, but I think I may end up having to explain as kindly as I can, to people who are still grieving, that yes I understand absolutely why they don't want things to change, but no it's not fair to the new people to treat them like that. Really don't want to have that conversation :-/
 
Less "pissed off" than "frustrated": a while back, a dear friend died unexpectedly. One of the social groups has kept going, but we don't have enough people to do the activities we did. So they want to bring in new people to make up the numbers, but then they don't want to treat them like full members of the group - have them leave events as soon as we don't need the head count any more.

Or that's what the email seemed to be saying; I hope I've misunderstood, but I think I may end up having to explain as kindly as I can, to people who are still grieving, that yes I understand absolutely why they don't want things to change, but no it's not fair to the new people to treat them like that. Really don't want to have that conversation :-/

Ugh, I’m sorry! That’s rough.

Can you postpone those activities that require more people for a while, perhaps?
It’s just so hard getting to know new people and giving them a chance to get to know you/the group when you are still in the acute phase after something traumatic.

I ask because at a job a few years back, we had an interview scheduled when the organization was hit with news that were quite shattering and would have a huge influence on everyone who was to sit in on the interview. It was too late to reschedule though, so it was decided that we’d do the interview.
Afterwards everyone went to lunch together at a nearby restaurant to vent and plot and lo and behold, there sits our interviewee…
People were unwilling to even acknowledge him and it was super awkward, so I went over and talked to him and told him that something big and difficult had happened and that it wasn’t something to do with him or the hiring process and talked for a short while.
He told me later that he would have noped out on us if I hadn’t explained the situation, because even if he hadn’t been able to put his finger on it, something had felt off during the interview.
 
A thread that I was participating in just vanished. Poof! Gone. No explanation. Sometimes I hate this place.
 
Ugh, I’m sorry! That’s rough.

Can you postpone those activities that require more people for a while, perhaps?
It’s just so hard getting to know new people and giving them a chance to get to know you/the group when you are still in the acute phase after something traumatic.

It's basically the thing that we do together, and it's been nine months. We've postponed what we can but we're running out of stuff to do with smaller groups. Unless we pick a new activity... but that's change, and change means it's no longer The Thing We Did With Her, so it's Bad.

A couple of months after she died, we needed to figure out who was going to organise events (something she used to do). I put up my hand, along with one other person. One problem we always had was people cancelling at the last minute, requiring her to do a ton of last-minute reorganising.

I suggested a way to help plan things that would make it easier to accommodate to those late cancellations... and got a ton of negativity from one of the other group members, who didn't seem to have actually read what I was saying. But it really boiled down to "this isn't the way E did it and I don't want it to change".

Yes. I liked the way E did it too. I loved her and I wish she was still around doing it. But she's not, and I'm not her, and I can't do it the same way she did. And the person who was complaining about this... is one of the most frequent last-minute cancellers (TBF not their fault, they have unpredictable health issues), and working around that is the main reason why I needed a way to deal with those late changes. In the end I gave up and it just fell back on the other volunteer, who has plenty going on in her own life.

(Sorry for venting here - most of the places I'd usually vent have people from that group in them and I don't want to exacerbate things :-/ )


I ask because at a job a few years back, we had an interview scheduled when the organization was hit with news that were quite shattering and would have a huge influence on everyone who was to sit in on the interview. It was too late to reschedule though, so it was decided that we’d do the interview.
Afterwards everyone went to lunch together at a nearby restaurant to vent and plot and lo and behold, there sits our interviewee…
People were unwilling to even acknowledge him and it was super awkward, so I went over and talked to him and told him that something big and difficult had happened and that it wasn’t something to do with him or the hiring process and talked for a short while.
He told me later that he would have noped out on us if I hadn’t explained the situation, because even if he hadn’t been able to put his finger on it, something had felt off during the interview.

That's good thinking. I did let the potential new people know about the background, because I know it's likely to be a weird kind of vibe. But that was before I got the "they don't stay for the socialising afterwards" request.
 
It's basically the thing that we do together, and it's been nine months. We've postponed what we can but we're running out of stuff to do with smaller groups. Unless we pick a new activity... but that's change, and change means it's no longer The Thing We Did With Her, so it's Bad.

A couple of months after she died, we needed to figure out who was going to organise events (something she used to do). I put up my hand, along with one other person. One problem we always had was people cancelling at the last minute, requiring her to do a ton of last-minute reorganising.

I suggested a way to help plan things that would make it easier to accommodate to those late cancellations... and got a ton of negativity from one of the other group members, who didn't seem to have actually read what I was saying. But it really boiled down to "this isn't the way E did it and I don't want it to change".

Yes. I liked the way E did it too. I loved her and I wish she was still around doing it. But she's not, and I'm not her, and I can't do it the same way she did. And the person who was complaining about this... is one of the most frequent last-minute cancellers (TBF not their fault, they have unpredictable health issues), and working around that is the main reason why I needed a way to deal with those late changes. In the end I gave up and it just fell back on the other volunteer, who has plenty going on in her own life.

(Sorry for venting here - most of the places I'd usually vent have people from that group in them and I don't want to exacerbate things :-/ )




That's good thinking. I did let the potential new people know about the background, because I know it's likely to be a weird kind of vibe. But that was before I got the "they don't stay for the socialising afterwards" request.

Ah, that complicates it.
Change is hard but it must be a difficult situation for you and the other volunteer with those expectations from (part of) the group.

This is the place to vent pissed offness, so no need to feel bad. I just tend to slip into problem solver mode.
 
So I had a mystery sickness come on while I was working today. By the time I logged out, I was feeling pretty crappy. So I debated whether I should burn one of my free Covid tests to check on what the mystery illness was.

I finally decided I probably should. So I tested, and it appears to be Covid. Dammit!

ETA: I had successfully dodged it up until this point, so that's why I'm so annoyed.
 
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So I had a mystery sickness come on while I was working today. By the time I logged out, I was feeling pretty crappy. So I debated whether I should burn one of my free Covid tests to check on what the mystery illness was.

I finally decided I probably should. So I tested, and it appears to be Covid. Dammit!
Take it easy, you'll probably need lots of rest. Get well soon.
 
So I had a mystery sickness come on while I was working today. By the time I logged out, I was feeling pretty crappy. So I debated whether I should burn one of my free Covid tests to check on what the mystery illness was.

I finally decided I probably should. So I tested, and it appears to be Covid. Dammit!

ETA: I had successfully dodged it up until this point, so that's why I'm so annoyed.

Get well soon Bunny!
 
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