wives of bi husbands

[reddcutie]

alot of men

are still in bondage to shame.......they would rather lie to themselves and to their wives than run the risk of having their manhood called into question....also, many men are sexually possesive, so even tho they might be bi they dont tell their wives because they dont want to share...

 

[gingermango]

Re: alot of men

are still in bondage to shame.......they would rather lie to themselves and to their wives than run the risk of having their manhood called into question....also, many men are sexually possesive, so even tho they might be bi they dont tell their wives because they dont want to share...

You say that as if it is an exclusive trait of men. Believe me, there are many women who act the same. I think it's endemic to the human condition. In a lot of ways, people are people and gender plays little role in this kind of psychology.

 

[reddcutie]

i agree with you gingermango...

however, the reason i stated my opion in this way is because the thread is wives of bi husbands.....not spouses of bi people....however, i think that an intelligent person would have to admit that we have a terrible double standard going on in western society right now. many, many people,(especially men) think that it is cute and/or down right arousing to picture 2 females together kissing and being sexual--but reverse the sexes, and the same people will exhibit scorn and down-right revulsion. I think this attitude has served to shame many men, and been the catylist for alot of sad deception later.

 

[gingermango]

Re: i agree with you gingermango...

however, i think that an intelligent person would have to admit that we have a terrible double standard going on in western society right now. many, many people,(especially men) think that it is cute and/or down right arousing to picture 2 females together kissing and being sexual--but reverse the sexes, and the same people will exhibit scorn and down-right revulsion. I think this attitude has served to shame many men, and been the catylist for alot of sad deception later.

That is an excellent point and one as an intensely bi-curious man I would agree with.

In fact, as you can see from the self-appellation I just used, it's one I fall victim to somewhat myself - "bi-curious." I use the term reflexively because I haven't yet had sexual contact with a man, yet I am undeniably attracted to certain men under certain circumstances. I know I ought to use the completely accurate phrase "bisexual" and for some reason I still hesitate.

Social programming indeed . . .

 

[reddcutie]

kiss for gingermango....

good luck....i wish it wasnt that way, i get so sick of dudes proclaiming their heterosexuality to the heavens...

 

[kalalau]

Re: i agree with you gingermango...

however, the reason i stated my opion in this way is because the thread is wives of bi husbands.....not spouses of bi people....however, i think that an intelligent person would have to admit that we have a terrible double standard going on in western society right now. many, many people,(especially men) think that it is cute and/or down right arousing to picture 2 females together kissing and being sexual--but reverse the sexes, and the same people will exhibit scorn and down-right revulsion. I think this attitude has served to shame many men, and been the catylist for alot of sad deception later.

Thanks redcutie.....I mentioned this very thing on another thread and its great to hear that there are people out there who can see this for what it is....

 

[wild175133]

Re: i agree with you gingermango...

however, the reason i stated my opion in this way is because the thread is wives of bi husbands.....not spouses of bi people....however, i think that an intelligent person would have to admit that we have a terrible double standard going on in western society right now. many, many people,(especially men) think that it is cute and/or down right arousing to picture 2 females together kissing and being sexual--but reverse the sexes, and the same people will exhibit scorn and down-right revulsion. I think this attitude has served to shame many men, and been the catylist for alot of sad deception later.

interesting replies redcutie could you enlighten us are you married and is your hubby bi? if he is how did you find out

 

[glnsveo]

bi curious, but wife can not know

I am extremely curious and will probly act soon with a special someone. Unfortunately my wife would be very hurt if she found out. It seems most of her relationships have ended because of this same issue. Her ex actually had another man come to live with them. Several of her ex boyfriends have turned out to be gay too. I did tell her before we ever started dating that I had strange feelings towards one of her best friends (who is gay). This much really upset her though. So I have totally dropped the issue with her and fantasize in private about it. It kinda sucks though.

 

[wild175133]

Re: kiss for gingermango....

good luck....i wish it wasnt that way, i get so sick of dudes proclaiming their heterosexuality to the heavens...

is your hubby bi red cutie

 

[reddcutie]

he has told me....

that he is straight.........of course.....

 

[Asuede]

Most men straight?

Of course, it isn't true. Most men seem to revel in watching two women make love and the web is full of women kissing and doing 69 in much greater numbers than men. When you do see men doing one another the positions, kissing and stroking are much different than the scenes with women. Men declare being straight mostly because they wish to be seen as verile by other men and a few women. Often the straight men will have a guy fuck his wife and then he will kiss his wife lick her pussy and fuck her after the other guy has cum in her mouth, ass, or pussy; all the while maintaing his straightness. Why not enjoy yourself and everyone just fuck and be sexu7al with one another regardless of gender. If it makes the other person feel good go ahead and enjoy helping them orgasm. Swallow their cum, kiss, suck tongues, asses, pussy, clit or cock with equal abandon. Take pictures and talk dirty if it turns you on.

 

[wild175133]

Re: he has told me....

that he is straight.........of course.....

there are a lot of str8 men who are pretty open minded and dont mind play with a guy under the right circumstances just how open minded in your hubby

 

[reddcutie]

i think you miss the point...

straight people dont play with peple of the same sex...period...thats what defines you as STRAIGHT.....other-wise, its called being in denial....

 

[reddcutie]

asuede......

why did you pm your thoughts to me? why not just post? neither one of us said anything very personal or offensive...and by the way, what are you talking about? there is nothing homophobic at all about stating that if you engage willingly in sexual relations with members of the same sex u are not straight. as for people who have group couplings and say they are straight i would disagree...i just believe in being truthful in my dealings with people, and i try to be self aware...i think others would be wise to do the same

 

[kalalau]

As for me, my willingness to play with other men makes me bi (at least!)! Calling myself straight would be a 'straight'-out lie!!! Ho-Ho!!

 

[reddcutie]

thats all im sayin....

 

[wild175133]

c'mon red we like to hear from you

 

[reddcutie]

lol...

i think perhaps it so simple that not much can be said...although i feel sympathy for the men who are bi and are having trouble accepting it due to social pressure, by english definition if you enjoy sex with both sexes that makes you bi...not an open-minded straight guy...many people are open minded...that just means you are accepting of many diffent sexual possibilities...and by the way, im bisexual so i know a little bit about the journey of self discovery...

 

[wild175133]

you have a good point red and it would be true in a perfect world but unfortunatly our world is not perfect it is unfortuate the number of guys who for one reason or another play on the wild side and most of them are married and their wife or g/f does not have a clue

 

[reddcutie]

and that....

just about sums it up, folks...sigh...

 

[Nordic man]

bi-oral so far both giving and receiving in a couple of threesomes, but not bi-anal yet, but one can hope.. I see myself as a bi-bottom myself personally.

 

[wild175133]

so far only a handfull of women have posted i was just wondering if there were any women who have had a negative experience with this and how did you deal with it

 

[reddcutie]

actually dear...

im the only chick that posted...i think......

 

[horndognslutpup]

Re: actually dear...

im the only chick that posted...i think......

Nope, you're not the only one. I'm on Page 2 twice, I think! This is one of my fovorite threads.

 

[horndognslutpup]

so far only a handfull of women have posted i was just wondering if there were any women who have had a negative experience with this and how did you deal with it

Sorry (?), but all our experiences have been positive. In fact, positive enough that he looks forward to continuing what he's already done and exploring new territory too. Couldn't ask for a better outcome for us! It's so important to me that his first few experiences are positive so that he knows how good it is and is enthused about continuing. Thank you Santa for a very promising bi husband!