❓ PLP Inquires II ❓

[TomTeacher19]

03.06.25

Do you have any scars? Do you have an interesting story behind it or a moment of regret? Tell us about your unintentional body art!

Yes, a few.

Having had four major surgeries on my legs there are several from those.

Plus another from a mud football injury

And one from being thrown through some glass.

 

[PrettyLilPussy19]

03.14.25

Let's talk about hard talks

Are you a good communicator normally? Does that extend to high stakes conversations? Would you consider yourself brave - are you more prone to initiate high-pressure or uncomfortable talks and address the issue? Or would you consider yourself more passive - do you wait for someone else to start the conversation or hope it passes? Are you receptive when someone comes to you with a big conversation or do you get defensive, quiet, or deflective? What was one of the hardest talks you had to have (if you want to share)? Are you happy with how it went or do you with you'd handled it differently?

What about good hard talks? How are you at confessing your feelings to someone without knowing how they feel?

 

[MrMakersMark]

03.14.25

Let's talk about hard talks

Are you a good communicator normally?

I think I am. But most would consider me a pretty exceptional under-sharer.
But in my defense, I prefer to listen.

Does that extend to high stakes conversations?

Yes. If I am asked for input, I'll provide what I've got.

Would you consider yourself brave - are you more prone to initiate high-pressure or uncomfortable talks and address the issue? Or would you consider yourself more passive - do you wait for someone else to start the conversation or hope it passes?

Passive.
Sometimes that isn't cowardly.
Sometimes it's braver to not speak.

Are you receptive when someone comes to you with a big conversation or do you get defensive, quiet, or deflective?

Used to be bad with deflection and avoidance.
Now mostly quiet.

What was one of the hardest talks you had to have (if you want to share)? Are you happy with how it went or do you with you'd handled it differently?

Difficult conversation I had with my Dad.
By all accounts, it went pretty well.

What about good hard talks? How are you at confessing your feelings to someone without knowing how they feel?

I'm shit at it.
A disaster.

 

[PrettyLilPussy19]

Ooh



Oh. This isn't what I was expecting. Nothing to do with phone/aural sex? Damn it.

Oh feel free to add some sub-questions on this if you'd like.

 

[PrettyLilPussy19]

I'm shit at it.
A disaster.

Jeez stop sugar coating it so much.

 

[MrMakersMark]

Jeez stop sugar coating it so much.

That WAS sugar-coating it.

 

[LadyLascivious1]

03.14.25

Let's talk about hard talks

Are you a good communicator normally?

Yes, I am. All my performance reviews and partners can confirm

The caveat is that I’m not always great about frequency of communication if I don’t see someone regularly. I just get busy with work/family or distracted with solitary activities.

I’m also not a talk on the phone every day to someone type. I hear my voice enough at work. I do better with people who are ok with quality over quantity. Or those that embrace messaging apps because I find it less draining and more enjoyable to keep up frequent communication that way.

Does that extend to high stakes conversations?

It does.

Would you consider yourself brave - are you more prone to initiate high-pressure or uncomfortable talks and address the issue?

Yes. I usually address them as early as possible. I’d rather get in front of the thing than let it fester and grow.

I also communicate much better when I’m not upset. It takes a lot for me to get emotional and I don’t think I’m at my best then, so I really try to bring up things long before they get to that point.

Or would you consider yourself more passive - do you wait for someone else to start the conversation or hope it passes?

Pretty sure no one has ever called me passive I even bring up things if I think the other person might be upset even though I’m fine.

That’s not the same as discussing everything though. If something isn’t important or was a one time issue/annoyance that’s unlikely to happen again, not worth talking about in my book. I only want to spend time on the things that matter.

Are you receptive when someone comes to you with a big conversation or do you get defensive, quiet, or deflective?

I try to be. I want to keep an open mind, listen, and understand their perspective before I do anything else. I’ll ask questions or for examples so that I’m not misunderstanding or making assumptions about what they mean. I may not agree entirely, but if they matter to me so does their viewpoint and experience.

Sometimes that means realizing there are certain topics that might be best avoided for the benefit of our relationship. If those get too numerous, then it’s time to consider if it’s a healthy dynamic/relationship.

What was one of the hardest talks you had to have (if you want to share)? Are you happy with how it went or do you with you'd handled it differently?

Probably the first time I brought up the idea of an open relationship. It was many years ago, so I don’t remember all the details. I was definitely a bit anxious going into it because it was something I really wanted to discuss and try, but also didn’t want to damage or end the relationship I was in at all.

Growing alongside people over years can be hard and scary sometimes.

It went really well actually. I generally find thinking and worrying about things are worse than actually doing the thing that’s dreaded.

What about good hard talks?

I think most hard talks are good because even if they’re difficult or scary in the moment, you end up happier or better off in the long run. At least I try to view them that way which makes having them a lot easier.

How are you at confessing your feelings to someone without knowing how they feel?

Decent, I think? I’m not really shy and would rather be honest and fail (or have them unrequited) than have regrets.

 

[Indie]

I'm pretty good at hard talks! I may be hesitant at first because I'm scared of what might happen as a result. But even when I'm scared, I will still speak my mind. It's incredibly important for me to understand others and to be understood. I know what I need. I know what is fair and realistic and good. I know how to treat others to make them feel as special as I hope to feel myself. I know when to bite my tongue and when to lay it all on the line. Communication is one of my strong points both personally and professionally. If you don't like to have open and honest conversations regularly, then you're probably not going to like me much

 

[PrettyLilPussy19]

03.14.25

Let's talk about hard talks

Are you a good communicator normally? Does that extend to high stakes conversations? Would you consider yourself brave - are you more prone to initiate high-pressure or uncomfortable talks and address the issue? Or would you consider yourself more passive - do you wait for someone else to start the conversation or hope it passes? Are you receptive when someone comes to you with a big conversation or do you get defensive, quiet, or deflective? What was one of the hardest talks you had to have (if you want to share)? Are you happy with how it went or do you with you'd handled it differently?

I'm a good communicator with other good communicators and get frustrated easily with people who can't or won't communicate well. That sentiment does extent to having hard, awkward or possibly tense conversations. I'm a good listener and am (probably too) good at putting myself in someone else's shoes. I don't think I'm at all brave but I am also extremely bad at sweeping things under a rug, hiding my feelings and pretending like everything is A-OK when it isn't, so I do most often end up initiating hard conversations to wildly varying degrees of success.
I can't honestly think of a time in recent memory when someone else has come to me with something hard. Maybe I'm not approachable?! (Makes a note to work on that) I know my, and most people's, gut reaction is to be defensive but I do know what it feels like to broach hard topics and I want to react how I would hope others would react to me - which is to try and listen and acknowledge, attempt to understand their position, discuss with honesty, and come to a workable resolution.
Of all the recent hard talks I've had, I can say I'd wished 100% of them had gone differently. Part of that is how the person I was trying to talk to reacted and part of that is me wanting too badly to be a peacemaker and not holding my ground. In the end, if we all end up miserable and lying to ourselves or the other person, what was the point?

What about good hard talks? How are you at confessing your feelings to someone without knowing how they feel?

I'm quite bad at this without feeling like the other person has already given me some major green flags. Luckily, I won't have to worry about that again. I'm much better at confessing my love and admiration of my friends, which I think more people need to do too.

 

[PrettyLilPussy19]

03.20.25

So I've got a couple of deep questions (for those that like challenging thinking) coming up so I thought we'd go with something fun and light.

If you had a big bowl of vanilla ice cream in front of you, what would be your ideal, weird toppings?

 

[MrMakersMark]

03.20.25

So I've got a couple of deep questions (for those that like challenging thinking) coming up so I thought we'd go with something fun and light.

If you had a big bowl of vanilla ice cream in front of you, what would be your ideal, weird toppings?

Ideal AND weird?
You did make it tough....

I've got an idea though.
A new spin on the Hot Fudge Sunday


Use this...

and this..Chopped into little bits to spirinkle on top

 

[PrettyLilPussy19]

Ideal AND weird?
You did make it tough....

I've got an idea though.
A new spin on the Hot Fudge Sunday


Use this...

and this..Chopped into little bits to spirinkle on top

Ok "ideal" and "weird" was perhaps a hard request but... you nailed it!

 

[UsuallyPresent]

03.20.25

So I've got a couple of deep questions (for those that like challenging thinking) coming up so I thought we'd go with something fun and light.

If you had a big bowl of vanilla ice cream in front of you, what would be your ideal, weird toppings?

Pepper jelly works a treat!

 

[morelikeasong]

03.14.25

Let's talk about hard talks

Are you a good communicator normally?

I’m okay. Depends what it is. I think I’m pretty good at communicating when I do actually communicate, though I avoid it a lot. I don’t like to tell people when they’ve upset me or to ask for what I need/want.
But I have gotten the compliment more than once, on here at least, that I’m a good communicator and deal with things in a really rational understanding way.

I’m more likely to implode than explode. So I’m never going to yell at you or throw insults or fly off the handle. But I am gonna cry in the shower for an hour, probably before and after the conversation

Does that extend to high stakes conversations? Would you consider yourself brave - are you more prone to initiate high-pressure or uncomfortable talks and address the issue? Or would you consider yourself more passive - do you wait for someone else to start the conversation or hope it passes?

Hmmm… there are times when I’ll just bring something up. Rip the bandaid off. But most of the time I just kick the can down the road hoping it will come up some other way.

Are you receptive when someone comes to you with a big conversation or do you get defensive, quiet, or deflective?

I’m trying to think of a good example of this and I can’t. I probably get a little defensive? I’m not sure. I get my feelings hurt pretty easily but I’m also hyper aware of not wanting my emotions to make someone else feel like they can’t criticize me in any way because I’m too fragile. So mostly I’d probably just be trying to understand what they’re saying and hold it together.
Not something I come across a lot, I don’t think.

What about good hard talks? How are you at confessing your feelings to someone without knowing how they feel?

Hmmm… I usually need to have a pretty darn good read on how the other person feels if I’m gonna do something like confess feelings. I definitely fear rejection. I’ll just flirt and flirt forever until eventually the territory becomes more clear .

 

[Lmizzler]

03.20.25

So I've got a couple of deep questions (for those that like challenging thinking) coming up so I thought we'd go with something fun and light.

If you had a big bowl of vanilla ice cream in front of you, what would be your ideal, weird toppings?

Not weird topping but weird habit...I want my ice cream to be the consistency of soft serve often. So I will scoop some into my bowl and let it slightly melt, then mix it up with my spoon until it is a soft, smooth consistency before I eat it.

Orrrr, because I'm impatient I'll eat half the bowl while it melts....then mix the remaining amount up into my own personal softserve!

Some of my favorite toppings include cherry jelly and pan scrapings from a tray of brownies!

 

[morelikeasong]

03.20.25

So I've got a couple of deep questions (for those that like challenging thinking) coming up so I thought we'd go with something fun and light.

If you had a big bowl of vanilla ice cream in front of you, what would be your ideal, weird toppings?

It’s not exactly weird but maybe less common? Cereal makes a really good ice cream topping.

These seem almost made for the job

 

[morelikeasong]

So I will scoop some into my bowl and let it slightly melt, then mix it up with my spoon until it is a soft, smooth consistency before I eat it.

When I was a kid, I used to do this all the time.
There was an episode of tv, I think the show Dinosaurs, where there was toxic sludge and I used to mix my ice cream until it was soft and call it toxic sludge

pan scrapings from a tray of brownies!

this is next level thinking

 

[MrMakersMark]

When I was a kid, I used to do this all the time.
There was an episode of tv, I think the show Dinosaurs, where there was toxic sludge and I used to mix my ice cream until it was soft and call it toxic sludge

this is next level thinking

Same part got me!

 

[UsuallyPresent]

It’s not exactly weird but maybe less common? Cereal makes a really good ice cream topping.

These seem almost made for the job

View attachment 2516126

Crushed Cinnamon Life FTW. Crunch, sweet, cinnamon, what's not to like?

 

[SalaciousMonkey22]

03.14.25

Let's talk about hard talks

Are you a good communicator normally? Does that extend to high stakes conversations? Would you consider yourself brave - are you more prone to initiate high-pressure or uncomfortable talks and address the issue? Or would you consider yourself more passive - do you wait for someone else to start the conversation or hope it passes? Are you receptive when someone comes to you with a big conversation or do you get defensive, quiet, or deflective? What was one of the hardest talks you had to have (if you want to share)? Are you happy with how it went or do you with you'd handled it differently?

What about good hard talks? How are you at confessing your feelings to someone without knowing how they feel?

I’m gonna cop out a little and say I don’t know that I’m the best person to assess how good I am at these things. I think I’m generally good at listening when someone comes to me with something.

As I’ve gotten older I’m less likely to come to anyone else with things…I sorta don’t think people change so if I’m upset about something I mostly figure out if it’s something I can accept or not (and more importantly am I really upset about that thing and not something else masquerading as that thing). If I decide it’s something I can’t accept as is, I will address it. But most of my hard nos are pretty easy to see early on. I don’t sweat small things with people? I don’t know.

I can get quiet when someone brings something to me. Maybe it’s defensive but usually it’s just because I need to process it and try and get to a place where I can speak accurately not reactively about it.

In general I think people overvalue rationality in human relationships. I don’t really care about rationality. Asking people to give you a logical step by step proof of their emotional reaction is, to me, shitty and abusive. We feel the things we feel. Sometimes we understand, sometimes we don’t. Relationships thrive in accepting that when you can and paying attention to behaviors that trigger emotions, even if you think they’re irrational.

I think I’m rambling. I’ll stop now.

 

[SalaciousMonkey22]

03.20.25

So I've got a couple of deep questions (for those that like challenging thinking) coming up so I thought we'd go with something fun and light.

If you had a big bowl of vanilla ice cream in front of you, what would be your ideal, weird toppings?

Vanilla and caramel are the world’s most perfect flavor combination. I see no need to tinker with perfection.

 

[PrettyLilPussy19]

I think I’m rambling. I’ll stop now.

Never stop the ramble. Therein lies the good stuff.

 

[morelikeasong]

Vanilla and caramel are the world’s most perfect flavor combination. I see no need to tinker with perfection.

She asked for weird!

 

[MrMakersMark]

Crushed Cinnamon Life FTW. Crunch, sweet, cinnamon, what's not to like?

That's a good one.

 

[SalaciousMonkey22]

She asked for weird!

My answer was responsive. I would put no weird toppings on because I’m wise enough to not mess with perfect. A skill I’m most happy possessing