~♥~ Battle of the Sexes ~♥~

yes, Daddy to all men everywhere. How'd I get to be their Daddy?
Great question!

The lady of the house, her wedding ring made from the purest shimmering samite, held aloft A BABY from the bosom of the water.

THAT is why I am their Daddy.
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Listen, strange women lying in ponds subtracting 1 from the total IS NO BASIS FOR A SYSTEM OF GOVERNMENT. Supreme executive power derives from a +1 from the masses, not some farcical aquatic ceremony!

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Look if I went around sayin' I was a Daddy just because some moistened wife had lobbed a baby at me....

well hang on actually that makes perfect sense.
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