🎁🎄 What is Krampus bringing the person above you? 🎄🎁

[JustAnotherFlower]

The note is the worst part of this

A brand new, well branded knife set, but it has to be washed by hand and goes dull within two uses.

 

[__Nathan1968]

A bag of loose screws and a note that says, "They came from important pieces in the house."

This reminds me of a prank I pulled on a coworker. I took fine wire, wrapped it around a push pin a dozen or so times, and clipped off the ends to make a ‘spring’. Then I put it under his keyboard, where he’d find it when he pulled it forward to type. I did this several days in a row and he kept pestering the IT guy that his keyboard was falling apart, bringing him the loose pieces as evidence.

 

[JustAnotherFlower]

This reminds me of a prank I pulled on a coworker. I took fine wire, wrapped it around a push pin a dozen or so times, and clipped off the ends to make a ‘spring’. Then I put it under his keyboard, where he’d find it when he pulled it forward to type. I did this several days in a row and he kept pestering the IT guy that his keyboard was falling apart, bringing him the loose pieces as evidence.

To get things kicked back off....

... Krampus is bringing him an entire meat locker of beef, but it thawed in transit.

 

[__Nathan1968]

I’ll be waiting:

Krampus is bringing her an unlimited gift card for plants and bulbs, but for the wrong growing zone.

 

[UnquietDreams]

I’ll be waiting:

Krampus is bringing her an unlimited gift card for plants and bulbs, but for the wrong growing zone.

Krampus is bringing a truck load of bottles of Kraft Barbecue Sauce.

 

[kieranhalcyon01]

A distressingly large amount of cheese. Like, entire fuckin' house overflowing with unwrapped babybels with the wax shoved into the vents and shit.

 

[MiaBabe23]

A distressingly large amount of cheese. Like, entire fuckin' house overflowing with unwrapped babybels with the wax shoved into the vents and shit.

Tickets to all his favorite shows and movies, that expired the day before delivery

 

[kieranhalcyon01]

Tickets to all his favorite shows and movies, that expired the day before delivery

Ooh, good, I get to stay home and nap!

47 boxes of monistat-3 and a heavily rusted front driver's side quarter panel from a cybertruck

 

[Lmizzler]

A jug of milk that is spoiled and a slotted spoon.

 

[sister jenny]

Sack of coal.

 

[__Nathan1968]

A ugly Christmas sweater woven from the hairs collected in the YMCA shower drains.

 

[Kitty_so_frisky]

A ugly Christmas sweater woven from the hairs collected in the YMCA shower drains.

A large bag of M&M’s to reload his cockapult™

 

[UsuallyPresent]

Catnip-scented condoms

 

[UnquietDreams]

Catnip-scented condoms

Bacon-scented lube

 

[curious_slut]

Bacon-scented lube

A yet to be published manuscript from his favorite living author missing the last 50 pages.

 

[UsuallyPresent]

A well-baked Hitachi Wand (IE, burnt out)

 

[sallysparrow23]

A well-baked Hitachi Wand (IE, burnt out)

A personalized fluffy blanket with unflattering pictures of his face all over it.

 

[SirConradPeckereye]

A personalized fluffy blanket with unflattering pictures of his face all over it.

Fifty penny gift cards to Office Depot.

 

[UsuallyPresent]

$100 in chips to the local casino that just closed

 

[SirConradPeckereye]

$100 in chips to the local casino that just closed

All expense paid trip to North Korea, with a complementary gulag stay.

 

[TheMrBurns]

Anal beads with a tear-away string.

 

[Photog1rl]

Anal beads with a tear-away string.

A home stereo that only plays the White Christmas soundtrack and can't be turned off.

 

[UsuallyPresent]

An Oogle internet-brain implant with ads

 

[Kitty_so_frisky]

An Oogle internet-brain implant with ads

An UnusualPresent

 

[UsuallyPresent]

An UnusualPresent

Damn! Enslaved by Krampus - now there’s an oddball NonCon story hook if ever there was one!

Catnip-scented septum piercing