Advice Please - Fantasy could come true

[Andee_julie]

Hi All..........

We are a married couple 37/38 who have never been with anyone else.
We share a fantasy of her having sex with another man. I think the fantasy is stronger ofr me than it is for her, although we use it during sex a lot.
She has mentions a guy at her works that she fancies and over time we have discussed about her having sex with him.
Now, she is due to leave work for good soon and our chats have again been about him.
Our fantasies have been that i would watch another guy having sex with her and take photos etc.
I have never met the guy at her works and i feel very excited that she talks about having sex with him.
My question is how can we both enjoy this encounter when i don't know him? and we have no idea how he would react if she suggested that i wanted to take photos of them together.
How could we approach him?
Do you have any other ideas on how we can both enjoy the experience?

Thanks in advance
Andy

 

[SweetErika]

Perhaps you could invite him over or out for a drink to get to know eachother a little and then pose the question. Start with the sex topic, and then work in your idea about photos. You might need to be flexible about the photos...I'm not sure how important actually having the photos is, but if taking them is part of your fantasy, you could offer to delete them in his presence after the sex if he feels uncomfortable about them getting out.

 

[Andee_julie]

Thanks SweetErika

Thats not a bad idea.
The photo thing is quite important as we would use them to spice our own sex sessions up.

I'm not too sure how he would react to our suggestion, but as my wife knows him, maybe she could go for a drink with him and make suggestions to test the water.

mmmm
maybe

 

[drummer34]

I think the fantasy is stronger ofr me than it is for her,

Be very very carefull, it has been the beginning in a lot of divorce cases. Many women like to fantasize and keep it at just that, a fantasy. Be 100% sure that she can cope before you start ANYTHING.

Sorry, don't want to be a spoil sport.....

 

[Andee_julie]

Thanks Drummer

i understand where you're coming from (pardon the punn) do you think it would be better if we arranged to meet a guy that we both don't know?
Or just keep it as a fantasy?

Andy

 

[londonaberdeen]

A stranger

This all depends on each individual, as you never know how they'll react.

Safest starngely is to pick someone neither of you know ans have no dealings with.

The last thing your wife needs is "friends" from work learning what you for pleasure.

Then there is the thoughts of could it become more? For him, for your wife, indeed at the back of your mind. If its a stranger to all there is no need for anyone to think this way. Just more comfortable all round if it's with a stranger.

 

[ricket]

If it were me I would want to meet with this other guy first. Be open with with the other guy, so no problems enter in to spoil this encounter. Then enjoy!

 

[Andee_julie]

Thanks ricket

You made things seem very clear there.........

If they want to have sex then it should be with me invlolved in some way.
If i met hime then this would put a face to her (my wife) hubby.
It would also make clear that we are doing this for our pleasure and not something done behind my back. (Which is exactly what it would be)

Thanks again

Andy

 

[DuckLover]

First I want to commend you for doing this research on the topic. The more you know about what to expect, the more likely it is that you will all have a positive experience. Threesomes is probably the most common topic addressed on the Lit How-To board, so there's a TON of information and informed advice. I strongly recommend that you go to "The Blank Manual" thread (top of the thread list)-- it is basically an index of threads. Scroll through it to "Threesomes" and consult the many threads listed.

Second, you and your wife need to have a VERY explicit and clear conversation about what you really want. This conversation needs to be during the harsh light of day, NOT in bed. Among many other issues (which you'll find in the above threads), an important one is whether you are looking for a one-time threesome or something ongoing.

Third, I agree that you should definitely meet the guy first. If you're not comfortable with him, the experience will go sour. If you two are looking for more of an ongoing relationship, it will be critical that you get to know this guy reasonable well too. An obvious easy setting is her going away party from work, assuming there is one. (If there isn't, she can throw one for herself. Just be sure to invite several people from the office, and perhaps spouses too. While there, you should talk with the guy, but not about sex. Get to know him a bit. If this session goes well, the two of you can invite him alone out for drinks or something again later. At that time, maybe your wife flirts with him (or both of you) a lot. Then she could go to the bathroom giving you an opening to tell him "She really thinks you'er hot," and build from there. If he's responding positively, you can propose your idea. Since you are the one bringing up the idea, he knows that you're ok with it. You should probably be pretty clear about what you want (to watch him fucking her), since some guys may automatically assume you're seeking a free-for-all, and if he's concerned about contact between you and him, it could spoil the deal.

Good luck, and let us know how it turns out!