Are you dominant or submissive

Naturally submissive, yet I have explored my dom side and do enjoy it! I'm just not sure I could do a long term dom thing. I have a deep craving for a DD/lg relationship.
 
I tend towards dominance, but not to the exclusion of being given able to feel submissive. So much depends on the mutual dynamic and trust.
 
For most of my life I didn't think I was into BDSM at all. I just figured most everybody else liked what I liked, 'cause I was normal. And my playmates were normal (mostly). And my delicate blushing bride was the most normal of us all.

Then, after she died, and cyber and phone and other means of LDR became a thing, I was half-convinced I was a Dom.

But, I left my Dom hat on top of the fridge and our twenty-year-old house cat decided she didn't want to get down to use the litter box and have the year-old tom kitten trying to mount her every time she turned around (#subproblems) and decided my hat looked like a good replacement.

So, now I'm back to just naked me. I mean, really, how Domly Dom could I be?
 
I chafe somewhat at either/or labeling, although I know it works for some people. I'm a "live and let live" sort of person in most of my life, but a rigger/dominant/voyeur in my erotic life. Definitely not sub or switch, but also not a Dom like some people are. My idea of the perfect partner is a strong intelligent woman with a significant sub streak -- she chooses to be a sub because it gives her pleasure.
 
I can see why some people don't like "labels" of being Dom or Sub. It seems like to me everyone's thoughts of what a sub or a Dom is, is different.

I am a switch. To me that means I can be a Dom or a sub depending upon the person I am with. I will say that in the past there were some women I was with who were submissive and my personality did not work for them. Looking back and knowing what I know now, I could be their Dom but back then I didn't really "feel it' when it came to dominating that person. Does it mean I am not really a Dom? No I think it was a learning experience and reinforced the fact that some women/personalities don't mesh with mine. That is true in the vanilla bedroom too.

ES
 
Back
Top