Be proud old guys!

So @barefootgirl69 reminded me that my sabbatical from here had been too long. Lets back up a few months and tell a truly outrageous story of @NRJLIVES4ever and his mighty member!

It was a cool, clear Friday in March. Our hero, @NRJLIVES4ever , was out at an out of the way record store. The store was old and creepy, ready to be condemned by both the health department and the building inspector. But that didn't matter to @NRJLIVES4ever . He was on a mission to find a record rumored to soak a girl's panties regardless of what else was happening around her. He needed to investigate that!

Three girls happened to walk in the cesspool, followed by the entire college football team. The girls were young and unclaimed by him as babygirls, but they had the look of meth-addicted zombies and he had no interest.

Unfortunately, the girls tried to hit on him and the boys got mad. Pushing and shoving occurred and @NRJLIVES4ever realized he was going to have to break out his fancy martial arts moves to get out unbothered. Sadly, he forgot the girls.

Two of them attacked the back of his knees. However, instead of falling, he pivoted and came face to crotch with the last methhead. Her teeth clamped down and tore a hole through our hero's jeans....AND tore his dick clean off his body!

Well, let me tell you, @NRJLIVES4ever was not the only one howling, but his was the loudest. He slapped the girl and his gargantuan gong dropped to his hand. He ninja kicked the football team, spiraling and giving out roundhouse kicks in a blur. He escaped and ran to the hospital.

Reluctantly, because they know how much the country depends on his wang, all of the doctors and surgeons could not reattach it. They did not have thr training. Or the heavy mechanized equipment to lift it and hold it in place.

Despairing, @NRJLIVES4ever headed home. Setting his mutilated member on the nightstand, he did something unusual for him: He kneeled down to pray. It was unusual because usually deities were only addressed by babygirls when he was making them orgasm. He wasn't sure he did it right, but he tried...and fell asleep from blood loss.

Our hero, as we mentioned, was not used to prayer, so he did not specify a deity or anything. Some of the more nocturnal and pleasure flesh gods heard the cry and called one of their own to assist.

@TongueLust got the call and arrived quickly. She quickly saw the damage and realized the gravity of the situation, even as the TV on in the corner reported on this catastrophic occurrence. Fearing global outbreaks of hysteria, she got to work, ministering over him for three days.

Finally, on Sunday, @NRJLIVES4ever awoke. He felt....different. Better. Stronger. Full of vigor again. Had he been dreaming?

He looked down and saw his dick attached and them saw @TongueLust . She told him of her fight to save him and what he now must do. He thanked her and gave her some of the blood of a virgin he'd managed to resist fucking so she could use it in future spells and concoctions. She believed it a good trade.

@NRJLIVES4ever went outside, unleashing his beast. It seemed so much more vibrant and eager to please and deflower. But today was not a day of celebration for just babygirls, but ALL the world!

Our hero took his resurrection rod and baptized every willing hole in a ten mile radius, showering them in the seed of the mighty. Men, women, non-binary, whatever. As long as they were willing and of age, they got to hear the gospel of his gong.

This worked out particularly well for @barefootgirl69 who's car quit within the radius.

At the end of that long day of proselytizing with his penis, @NRJLIVES4ever cane home and thanked his lucky stars that he was still a whole man.

Happy Easter!

(And you thought an Easter story about @NRJLIVES4ever would overuse the bunny trope). :p
 
If you or your region has been experiencing severe flooding recently, representatives for @NRJLIVES4ever would love to apologize.

He's been on vacation, visiting several babygirl homestead and cheerleader camps all summer.

Unfortunately, he forgot that he can't go skinny dipping in major waterways. His enormous anaconda submerges and floods everything in a several hour radius.

Thankfully his summer tour with his phenomenal phallus is nearly over. He'll take some time to rest and get ready to attend @sallysparrow23 's orientation sessions in August
 
So I was out cleaning a building today because we are putting a haunted house in it. With all of the grime and guck, as well as trash from snacks, props, etc., it was a real chore.

It got me to thinking about when I was younger. My sister and I did summer house cleanings and that's how we made money. It wasn't always fun or easy, especially that first clean of summer, but it was a way to learn skills and earn some cash.

"Hey, we wanna hear about @NRJLIVES4ever 's perfect pecker! When did this become about YOU!?"

@OrdinaryPerson , please calm down. Like Ted Mosby in HOW I MET YOUR MOTHER, sometimes the story takes a while to get where it's going.

Anyway, as I aged and moved out on my own, I was still the primary cleaner of apartments and such. I wasn't as fanatical about it as my mom had been, but I wasn't going to live in the junkyard of forgotten granola bars, wrappers of various foods, and whatethat sticky red substance was on the counters. I had some standards.

This would continue in my life and I found that I expected the world to at least meet, if not exceed, my standard. Unfortunately, many people do not, one of those being @NRJLIVES4ever .

The first time I went over to his place for an interview, I thought he had either been robbed or had somehow let a tornado loose in his living room. But when I asked if everything was okay, he just shrugged and said everything was normal.

He could see I was squirming in the mess and he said that with all of the babygirl banging he does, it's usually just too exhausting and time-limiting to clean. But he said that if bothered me that bad, I could clean while he went to free his willy in some @morelikeasong mound and we could do the interview when he returned.

I quickly agreed and it was 20 minutes into cleaning before I realized @morelikeasong isn't the usual age of a babygirl for @NRJLIVES4ever . But I figured I could ask later.

Flash forward to the next day around 4pm and I was putting away the final piece of laundry that I had washed after whatever punani broth bath they had been in when @NRJLIVES4ever walked in. He stopped dead, thinking he had accidentally returned to the wrong house.

He saw me and quickly relaxed. He complimented me on my work and we did the interview. Near the end, I asked if there was anything he wanted the world to know or that he thought he needed to be successful. The answer was not what I was expecting.

END PART 1
 
Begin Part 2

The room was cavernous. I had been in major arenas before but this seemed to dwarf that. When i asked @NRJLIVES4ever if it was new, he replied they had just finished building it. They knew this event would house more than some of the largest stadiums in existence and they had to be ready.

Security let us in and we both noted it might not be enough. But we were not the event organizers and found our way back stage. Not a surprise based on the event, but some of the usual suspects were there, including @LustfulIntentions2 with @SalaciousMonkey22 as well as @BBCBull27 with @drobert44 , among others. @NRJLIVES4ever nodded politely and we went to the assigned dressing room.

"How did you get mixed up in something like this?" I ask, shaking my head in thorough confusion.

"I was at @morelikeasong 's yesterday and she mentioned she'd won tickets. She asked me if I was taking part. I hadn't heard about it, so I looked it up and called the organizers. " He sat down on the.comfy couch. "They hadn't invited me because they had made improper assumptions about me as many do. But when I told them I was interested and could bring thousands of young babygirls to watch, they put out the word. Remaining tickets sold out almost instantly. "

"All babygirls?" I chimed.

"No. My usual harem also quickly grabbed a row. Luckily they are near security so hopefully they won't storm the stage."

"And why me again?"

"I needed someone with your unique talents. I saw that when I returned home."

I shake my head, confused as to how doing laundry and scrubbing toilets will help here, but keep my peace.

A young usher peaks in. "Ready on stage."

@NRJLIVES4ever nods and we head out. We are behind and to the edge of the curtain. The arena is pumped and full of men and women yelling and clapping and waiting for the event to start.

They call each group to come out. Ours was last. My name naturally got zero recognition, but when they announced @NRJLIVES4ever , and 8.9 earthquake of applause and cheering erupted, deafening the poor usher and making his ears and eyes bleed.

Order was returned and the MC of the event, @Soma99 , issued a welcome to all. She laid out the rules of the winners-take-all event and the crowd cheered more.

"And now...let's meet our judges!"

End Part 2
 
Part 3

The judges paraded out on stage, all wearing sexy regalia designed to help encourage the men on stage. It was definitely working as all three women were being eyed hungrily.

@Soma99 announced each in order, allowing them to prance around the stage before taking a seat on their throne.

"First up: @Tallulah82 !" The crowd clapped enthusiastically.

"Second up: @JerseyJade !" Another incredible and ceaseless applause.

"Last,but not least: @LizVegas79 !" Another eruption of applause.

All three ladies took their thrones and @Soma99 instructed the men participating to get naked. Fun music blasted and the men naturally started intricate strip tease routines to out Magic Mike the others. Screams of desire and delight echoed endlessly.

@NRJLIVES4ever slowly undressed, not reacting to the music or the competition. He'd find a babygirl in the audience as he undid each button, causing mass fainting as he made eye contact.
He offered his tie to security as @barefootgirl69 tried to rush the stage, hollering like a banshee. Security quickly gagged her with his tie and she sat demurely the rest of the show.

Finally, all of the men were naked and seated. Most had erect cocks from all of the excitement. @Soma99 announced that the competition could begin.

Frowning at my luck, I reached into my back pocket and pulled out a cleaning rag. Using a non-scented and oily lotion, I put some on the rag and knelt down.

Using my decades long cleaning career, I made sure to intensely clean and scour all of the many inches of @NRJLIVES4ever 's cock. Treating it like the largest candle stick I'd ever seen in my life, I deftly worked to make his shaft shine.

A buzzer went off and we all stood, which my back needed after that. The judges descended from their thrones and inspected each cock thoroughly. Nearly an hour later they were done viewing, poking, and prodding all the quivering members and had made a decision.

@Soma99 took the envelope and looked inside. "Our winner of the Perfectly Polished Pecker award goes to....
@NRJLIVES4ever !" And the crowd roared again.

When the din finally died down, @Soma99 had @ToPleaseHim bring out the grand prize: A lifetime supply of Zima!

Side note: Apparently @NRJLIVES4ever also had a great time backstage with the judges, announcer, and prize bearer. He showed me some Blair Witch quality videos later. But I had to leave and get my wrist looked at.

Fun fact: They don't do this competition anymore because it was too obvious who the winners would be. So if you are ever at @NRJLIVES4ever 's house and you see his award, know he's the only one.to ever win it in history.

Now, off to physical therapy for my wrist
 
I am 43 years old and just finished the best sex of my life with a 19 year old goddess!
I know it's perverted...
I know Im old enough to be her father...
But I couldn't resist. I just had to brag.
So over time I have had age difference relationships, with gals.. currently 10 yrs older than my wifey..
Once, I was 19 and she was 33
I was 21 and he was 64..

[Post edited by moderator to remove content that is prohibited at Literotica.com]
 
Last edited by a moderator:
Part 3

The judges paraded out on stage, all wearing sexy regalia designed to help encourage the men on stage. It was definitely working as all three women were being eyed hungrily.

@Soma99 announced each in order, allowing them to prance around the stage before taking a seat on their throne.

"First up: @Tallulah82 !" The crowd clapped enthusiastically.

"Second up: @JerseyJade !" Another incredible and ceaseless applause.

"Last,but not least: @LizVegas79 !" Another eruption of applause.

All three ladies took their thrones and @Soma99 instructed the men participating to get naked. Fun music blasted and the men naturally started intricate strip tease routines to out Magic Mike the others. Screams of desire and delight echoed endlessly.
Hey Liz! We're celebrities! :D
 
Today is @NRJLIVES4ever 's birthday. And we all know what that means.



It means it's opposite day. Instead of him blowing out the endless candles on his cake that keep setting off the fire alarm, it means he's invited some special babygirls over to blow his candle. Not only a gargantuan task, but very messy when it finally does explode.



But as much as @NRJLIVES4ever likes to receive, he's inherently a giver. Plus, since his birthday falls on Thanksgiving this year, he wanted to make sure that others had something to be thankful about this holiday.



His day started by waking up and flipping through some new Barely Legal porn. Always important to see what filth brand new babygirls are willing to engage in. After getting pinged by men and women all over the world, he got up and showered.



Dressing in his Armani suit, he headed to the Babygirl Academy. @sallysparrow23 had some international babygirls staying over break and asked for @NRJLIVES4ever to stop by and break bread with them. Naturally, by the time he was done, bread (and their hips) were broken from too much stretching.



@sallysparrow23 called @Bry1313 to get the babygirls medical support and some rest. They'd be mobbed Monday by the returning babygirls. She told @NRJLIVES4ever that she appreciated the visit and wished him a happy birthday bent over her desk.



Next up, @NRJLIVES4ever talked to his mom who somehow had no idea of his fame and yes,he'd get yams before he came over. After putting all the vegetables to shame at the grocery store and nearly drowning the produce girl in a quick fuck, our hero went to family to celebrate turkey day and his birthday.



What's on tap tonight? Glad you asked.



As i mentioned, he's a giver. Knowing the holiday season is cold and lonely, but also knowing that everyone can use a morale boost, he throws a party and invites women of all ages over.



A myriad sampling of the guest list includes:

@Tallulah82

@barefootgirl69

@sallysparrow23

@ToPleaseHim

@JerseyJade

@morelikeasong

@ImpishSeraph

And so many other women. He knows that babygirls often get his full attention, but today is a day to be thankful for his giant rod and that shouldn't be reserved to babygirls.

So tonight, the ambulances from every hospital within a mn hour is on call for whatever sexual shenanigans @NRJLIVES4ever and all of his guests might get up to.


Happy birthday, @NRJLIVES4ever and Happy Thanksgiving everyone!
 
Today is @NRJLIVES4ever 's birthday. And we all know what that means.



It means it's opposite day. Instead of him blowing out the endless candles on his cake that keep setting off the fire alarm, it means he's invited some special babygirls over to blow his candle. Not only a gargantuan task, but very messy when it finally does explode.



But as much as @NRJLIVES4ever likes to receive, he's inherently a giver. Plus, since his birthday falls on Thanksgiving this year, he wanted to make sure that others had something to be thankful about this holiday.



His day started by waking up and flipping through some new Barely Legal porn. Always important to see what filth brand new babygirls are willing to engage in. After getting pinged by men and women all over the world, he got up and showered.



Dressing in his Armani suit, he headed to the Babygirl Academy. @sallysparrow23 had some international babygirls staying over break and asked for @NRJLIVES4ever to stop by and break bread with them. Naturally, by the time he was done, bread (and their hips) were broken from too much stretching.



@sallysparrow23 called @Bry1313 to get the babygirls medical support and some rest. They'd be mobbed Monday by the returning babygirls. She told @NRJLIVES4ever that she appreciated the visit and wished him a happy birthday bent over her desk.



Next up, @NRJLIVES4ever talked to his mom who somehow had no idea of his fame and yes,he'd get yams before he came over. After putting all the vegetables to shame at the grocery store and nearly drowning the produce girl in a quick fuck, our hero went to family to celebrate turkey day and his birthday.



What's on tap tonight? Glad you asked.



As i mentioned, he's a giver. Knowing the holiday season is cold and lonely, but also knowing that everyone can use a morale boost, he throws a party and invites women of all ages over.



A myriad sampling of the guest list includes:

@Tallulah82

@barefootgirl69

@sallysparrow23

@ToPleaseHim

@JerseyJade

@morelikeasong

@ImpishSeraph

And so many other women. He knows that babygirls often get his full attention, but today is a day to be thankful for his giant rod and that shouldn't be reserved to babygirls.

So tonight, the ambulances from every hospital within a mn hour is on call for whatever sexual shenanigans @NRJLIVES4ever and all of his guests might get up to.


Happy birthday, @NRJLIVES4ever and Happy Thanksgiving everyone!
Happiest birthday to @NRJLIVES4ever ! And what a happy, eventful Thanksgiving!
 
So as the calendar turns to December, we think of winter weather and someone to keep us warm. The babygirls at the Babygirl Academy are hurriedly prepping for finals as @sallysparrow23 gets ready to test them.

Sample question: When orally servicing @NRJLIVES4ever , what should you do with your hands?

Tough questions that required intense dedication during the year and a good memory.

As i sit here tonight, I'm listening to the wind howl wildly. It's blowing in 50+ MPh gusts and sounds like it's tearing down my house. Definitely an oncoming sign of winter.

But what kind of journalist would I be if I didn't check this weather phenomenon out before officially reporting such a thing?

So I did the most realistic thing. I called @NRJLIVES4ever and asked him to stop doing helicockter whirls for @morelikeasong

Surprisingly, he told me he wasn't doing that and hadn't in a few weeks. Apparently they were still fixing the giant hole in her bedroom wall and she goes to the dentist next week to get her implants in after getting too close to his wildly whirring wang.

I asked him if he heard or felt the wind at his house. He said no. That was odd too. I looked outside while talking and saw that it was only a narrow corridor of wind...and it went past my house. I hung up, bundled up, and fought like the earliest pioneers to head west into the wind.

As I suspected, it led me to @NRJLIVES4ever 's house. "That lying bum," I muttered. I went around to the back door, finally escaping the wind. Using my emergency key, I went inside.

And stopped. @NRJLIVES4ever was NOT doing helicockter whilst. He was furiously wanking in front of the open door, causing so much friction that it was fifty degrees higher in his house than outside. And that heat, mixed with the cold, had turned into a sideways schlong-orchestrated tornado!

I shook my head to clear the fascination of this and yelled at @NRJLIVES4ever . He jumped in startled surprise, but kept stroking. I yelled at him to stop and why and he finally understood. He dropped his hand and the sudden change in pressure threw us both out the front door and into the yard.

We picked ourselves up and went back inside.
"What were you doing?" I asked in bewilderment.

"Masturbating, " came the obvious answer.

"Does that ALWAYS happen?" I asked.

He shrugged. "I don't know. I rarely masturbate. I just didn't feel like a babygirl or anything tonight. Thought I'd spice it up."

I just shook my head. "Don't do that again. All these babygirls exist for a reason. And apparently so it's that you don't destroy the city."

@NRJLIVES4ever nodded and I headed home. "Imagine Masturbating so hard that you caused a tornado. " Chuckling to myself, I headed home.


Yes, I tried it. No, i didn't cause a tornado.


Dammit.
 
So its closer and closer to Christmas and the season is in full swing. Lots of people go see Christmas lights, help the needy, see family, and/or spend time watching Christmas movies.







Did you know that @NRJLIVES4ever has a favorite Christmas movie? Like many other people, his favorite is the animated HOW THE GRINCH STOLE CHRISTMAS. A timeless tale of an old grump and a babygirl finding a way to enjoy the season. Or something to that effect when @NRJLIVES4ever tells us about it.







I've learned some interesting facts watching the movie with @NRJLIVES4ever each year, including, but not limited to:







1. When he first told me the summary, I thought maybe Cindy Lou Who was just a really young looking babygirl and the Who people aged differently. They don't. Cindy Lou Who's Mom was just super young and SHE is still a babygirl.


2. The Who people are freaks of nature. Small enough that Horton can hear them, but not see them, but still large enough to measure shit in FEET!


3. @NRJLIVES4ever watches it every year because he's referenced in it! (Yes, babygirls are expected to know this piece of trivia if they want to pass @sallysparrow23 's final exam about candy canes and proper licking techniques).

I missed the reference the first few times as well. It's subtle, but obvious once you know what to look for.

The line in the song goes:

"I wouldn't touch you with a 39-and-a-half foot pole!"

Wouldn't you know it? The Who people measure things in standard @NRJLIVES4ever scale. And that just happens to be the size of HIS candy cane, especially after a babygirl makes it grow three sizes.

Isn't Christmas a miraculous season?
 
Some days you just want to slip back into a fun-filled and nostalgic day.

That's what @NRJLIVES4ever was up to last weekend. As fun as it is to bang babygirls and teach them about the finer things in life, some days you just want to chill

@NRJLIVES4ever considered watching cartoons all day like he used to or playing some stick ball in the street. But when he was looking for his favorite stick to use (aside from the permanently attached one), he ran across his old gaming set. Delighted, he pulled it out and set it up.

At this time, the doorbell rang. Grumbling, @NRJLIVES4ever opened the door to find some older ladies peddling homemade cookies. Apparently with the uncertainty in the economy, these ladies had decided to see if they still had their Girl Scout ability to pimp cookies.

@NRJLIVES4ever invited them in and bought some. While there, they noticed the gaming system and said that took them back to younger days. @NRJLIVES4ever asked if they wanted to stay and play. One agreed, but the other left because she wanted to sell more cookies before the daylight faded. (It was a Saturday morning).

@NRJLIVES4ever and the lady (let's call her @SassySheDevil ) sat down to play. They played all sorts of games. As they were getting more competitive, they began eyeing each other seductively.

Finally, @SassySheDevil shut off the console. "How about we play Dong and ill use your joystick?"

It had been a while since @NRJLIVES4ever had been with anyone but a babygirl, so the sure hand and smooth motions told him that not only was her supple wrist good at this, but she probably had the high score on Pong!

Finally, @SassySheDevil hit the right cheat code and @NRJLIVES4ever spewed extra lives all over his living room...and the plate of cookies. @SassySheDevil grinned, grabbed the plate of cookies, and left, nibbling on a cream covered macaroon, smiling happily.

@NRJLIVES4ever smiled and went back to playing video games. Some days...it's the simple things in life.
 
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