Claymore and Dagger (closed)

[KieranSoares]

"You'll be able t'go wherever you like, love. You don' have to be trapped 'ere forever if you don' want. But if y'do want t'stay, I'm sure I could use th'help."

 

[heartofcourage]

"But I don't want to leave Inverness. This is home. This is where everything is normal and makes sense." Heather tried to explain to her brother.

 

[KieranSoares]

"Tha's fine, love. I'm no' saying you have to leave. Jus' tha' you don' ever have t'feel trapped," Sam leaned down to kiss her forehead. "I want you t'feel free."

 

[heartofcourage]

"I am free." Heather said after her brother kissed her forehead. "And when I'm scared I know I have a family that will help me."

 

[KieranSoares]

"Tha' you do, love." Sam let a hand rest on her shoulder as they continued on.

Later when they returned to the keep, Sam found his parents and Fiona, and he approached Brogan. "Da. I think we need t'talk. Th'four of us."

 

[heartofcourage]

Julia looked at Sam and then at Brogan. Her husband looked tense but she knew this was a conversation that they all needed to have. "Of course, love. Let's go to our rooms."

Fiona looked at Sam with slight confusion, reaching out to take his hand. "What's going on?" She asked him softly.

 

[KieranSoares]

As Brogan and Julia led the way, Sam murmured to Fiona, "Da's afraid to bring up th'throne with me... I think it's time we got it out o' the way." Giving her hand a gentle squeeze, he met her gaze. "An' yer as much a part o' this as I am."

 

[heartofcourage]

"You already know my feelings, Sam." Fiona said softly as he looked her in the eye. "I'm stuck with you through thick and thin."

 

[KieranSoares]

Sam's answer and gratitude came in the form of a kiss before they stepped into Brogan and Julia's private parlor. Once they all sat down facing each other, Sam met Brogan's gaze. "I know Rho was second-guessing the throne with Naiya. Now with a cub on th'way, I know 'e's more concerned about family than ruling."

"Seems like none o' you kids save Kate were ever willing t'take the throne. I know you never wanted it either, Sam."

"I might not want it, but I'll accept it," Sam told his father with a confident nod. "I know everything Rho does about ruling and I've helped you govern for most of my life. I can handle it."

Brogan still hesitated, though, looking to Julia. She knew his fears, that Sam would never be content and that he'd work himself to death. They were understandable fears with Sam's habits and track record.

 

[heartofcourage]

Julia listened to Sam quietly and when Brogan looked her direction, she let a soft sigh. "Sam, I have always felt that you were the best choice to become king after your father. However, we do not want you to sacrifice your happiness for the throne."

"I won't let him." Fiona said softly, looking at her future in laws. "His happiness means the world to me."

 

[KieranSoares]

"I know if I were going t'do it alone, I migh' be prone t'working too much again. Even more Tha before... But I think I can manage with Fiona. But that aside... Da, I know it's gettin' harder an' harder fer you to keep up with yer work while also keepin' time fer family. Ye've already split half of it with Rho, or more when yer ill. I'm no' askin' you to step down righ' now, but I think you ought t'let Rho focus on Naiya, an' you an' I will work together for a while til yer sure I can handle it all. I'm going t'start appointing new higher officers and leaders fer the guard an' the Axemen, an' I'll be bringing up people t'help me manage th'military as well. Tha' way I can focus on workin' with you an' planning fer this war."

 

[heartofcourage]

"And I can pick up some of the slack as well." Fiona said as Sam addressed his concerns. "I won't run off because of work or stress. I'm in this for the long haul. I adore your son and Inverness is and always has been my home."

 

[KieranSoares]

Brogan sighed and sat back, rubbing his temple. Despite all their reassurance, he was still worried and he didn't have a good feeling about putting even more on Sam's plate. "I... I don' know..."

 

[heartofcourage]

"You'll never be completely certain." Julia said as she looked to her husband. "But I know you're tired, love. Even if Samuel decides it's not for him, there would be time to find another heir for this throne. You need a rest."

 

[KieranSoares]

"I'll think about it... We'll see how you two handle it," Brogan murmured, unwilling to commit completely until he saw proof that Sam and Fiona could handle it while keeping a good relationship and family life.

 

[heartofcourage]

"Which means you'll have to learn to be happy before it kills you." Fiona said to Sam, half joking and half serious.

 

[KieranSoares]

"I'll figure it out eventually," Sam murmured, earning a glance from his father.

"... Even so long later, knowin' you did what you had to an' it wasn' yet fault... Y'still can't get away from it, lad?"

"I still think we could've solved it all without Tidannon an' Tidus an' Lir dying... An' without Ciaran an' Rho bein' scarred forever."

 

[heartofcourage]

"It was a long time ago, Sam." Fiona said softly. "And stewing about it isn't going to change the fact that it happened/"

 

[KieranSoares]

"I can' just shut it off," Sam muttered, his expression growing a bit more grave and serious as it did anytime someone told him that. "But it doesn' have to get in th'way of my job."

 

[heartofcourage]

"It will. As much as you don't think it will, it will come back to haunt you." Julia said to her son as his expression soured and he turned serious. "You need to work it out and find your peace. You need a clear head and a clearer conscience."

 

[KieranSoares]

"I'll figure it out," Sam muttered, but Brogan glanced to Fiona and Julia. He knew Sam would continue to work too hard to forget or make up for what he considered to be his fault. The serious man had long convinced himself that if not for him, Suara wouldn't have lost her son and mate, Lir would be alive, and Rho would have both his arms. And there didn't seem to be anything anyone could do to convince him that he hadn't set all of that into motion. In the silence, Sam rose and quietly stepped out.

Brogan watched him go, and murmured, "I think it's those moments tha' scare me most... It reminds me o' my Da..."

 

[heartofcourage]

"He told me that he doesn't think that he can really ever be happy." Fiona said softly, watching as the door closed behind him when he left. "That worries me."

 

[KieranSoares]

"It worries us too, love... In fact sometimes it terrifies me," Brogan sighed. "I see far too much o' my father in Sam... More'n I ever saw in Boar or myself. I'd be less worried if Ma was still here... She always helped Sam manage tha' guilt an' anger... None of th'rest of us ever figured out how she managed it."

 

[heartofcourage]

"Have any of you ever asked him?" Fiona asked, glancing towards Julia and Brogan as they both shook their heads.

"His time with his gran was always beyond our asking." Julia said softly. "He protected her fiercely."

"Then I'll ask." Fiona said. "He'll talk to me, probably in a way that he never talked to either of you before."

 

[KieranSoares]

"Ye'll be in fer a fight, love," Brogan warned her. "If you push, he'll lash out. He doesn' mean any of it... But he'll run 'r say whatever 'e can t'make you drop it... Don' hold it against 'im." Brogan shook his head slowly. "He may be a grown man, but inside there's still a terrified, guilty little boy tha' can't forgive 'imself even when everyone else 'as."