Deal with post-anal emotional issues

[James G 5]

Lynn, that sounds about the most like the reaction my ex had, thanks.

 

[dicky911]

I jsut saw this thread, I know its very old so I dont know if anyone is still interested in it or not. But I found it interesting. My husband and I occasionally do anal, it can be wonderful. But there are times I have a bit or emotional issue after. Anal, for me, is so very very intense. There is a part of anal sex that is almost like rape in a way. While I completely enjoy him inside me, there is no question that there is a bit of pain and certainly there is a dominance aspect to it. When he is inside me, its so intense that often I am almost paralyzed. So I am clearly totally submissive to him at that point. When we are done sometimes i need to go to the bathroom, but sometimes i just lay there and recover. And as my thoughts return to normal I sometimes feel like i have been "taken" or "violated." This is when it is so important that he show me his tender side. I need him to just very softly hold me or touch me and kiss me and whisper that he loves me. Sort of a reassurance, a reconnection. He is the only man i let do anal with me, and I am so very grateful for that. I think had i done it wiht just a bf, like in college, i would have felt humiliated afterwards and embarassed. It is a very very personal act that I can only share with my husband because we really are so totally in love. I know this is a bit rambling, sorry. But I hope that guys understand that for some women (not all clearly) anal sex can be a bit emotionally....whats the word.....draining. Both before, and especially after the sex, please remind her that you love her AND that you respect her.

an excellent post - I think this captures how it is for many women! - as well as what is very appealing to the man.... quite apart from the passage through the tight muscle, both on entry and on exit... mmmm!