extremely turned on at work by....

[bailadora]

It's funny to me, and maybe most of Chinese, that most of you are okay with it if a man fucks his daughter or mother or he invites another man to fuck his wife,

Just how do you reach that conclusion? I've NEVER seen a HT regular advocate incest. As for a couple wanting to bring in other partners, no one blinks an eye, as long as ALL parties involved are in agreement.

<snip> ....but you are not okay it if a man is going to fuck another woman, even nobody knows it.

Perhaps this part of KrisL's post escaped your notice?

any suggestions??

Which means he invited commentary - good, bad, indifferent. If you don't want to know, don't ask!

And since he DID ask, the consensus (minus one or two) is that only a fool undertakes an office affair, given US federal law regarding sexual harassment in the workplace and the consequences thereof. In 2010 alone, more than eleven thousand sexual harassment cases were filed with EEOC.

 

[thirty]

Just how do you reach that conclusion? I've NEVER seen a HT regular advocate incest. As for a couple wanting to bring in other partners, no one blinks an eye, as long as ALL parties involved are in agreement.


.

Tell me which thread about incest got as many negative comments as this thread did.

I know it's the culture difference, here in China, if a man bring another man to fuck his wife, people would think he is insane, no matter his wife agrees with it or not. It's just a bit less digusting than he fucks his mother.

A person wants to have sex with someone else he/she likes, that's human nature, although you have tons of reasons to look down on it.

 

[bailadora]

Tell me which thread about incest got as many negative comments as this thread did.

I know it's the culture difference, here in China, if a man bring another man to fuck his wife, people would think he is insane, no matter his wife agrees with it or not. It's just a bit less digusting than he fucks his mother.

A person wants to have sex with someone else he/she likes, that's human nature, although you have tons of reasons to look down on it.

Actually, a good portion of this thread consists of people refuting Nasty Deed's claims and assertions, so I don't think you can use post count as an indicator of popularity.

As to the incest threads, there was one just a week or so ago. The OP claimed to be a long time forum lurker and wanted to know the board's opinion, to which Ed replied that if the OP was what he claimed he was, he already knew that opinions were going to be less than favorable.

Lastly, I didn't say I looked down upon KrisL. What I said was, he risks jeopardy to his job/career if he engages in an office affair, given US sexual harassment statutes. US law is what it is, Thirty. Whether you agree with it or not is irrelevant.

 

[satindesire]

I'm a sexist because I love sex? You got be kidding me!

Who made you the judge and landlord of HT?

No, you're sexist because of your often and clearly expressed double standards about gender roles, sexuality and marriage.

Don't play innocent. I've seen plenty of your crap here and in the GB.

Who made me judge and landlord?

All the wonderful people here that enjoy my policing the boards and keeping it relatively free of trolls.

If you don't like it, you have an ignore feature you're free to use. Or you could leave. Either one is fine with me and I sincerely doubt you'd be missed.

 

[thirty]

If you don't like it, you have an ignore feature you're free to use. Or you could leave. Either one is fine with me and I sincerely doubt you'd be missed.

or I stay here.

I guess I have the right unless I'm against the forum rules.

 

[Texguy84]

You can either be the stud, or you can be the wimp who holds the stud’s pants while he fucks your wife.

I'm gonna hazard a guess here and say you've held many pairs of pants in your time.

 

[satindesire]

or I stay here.

I guess I have the right unless I'm against the forum rules.

You absolutely have the right to be here.

I also have the right to call you out on being a sexist ass, since that's not against forum rules either.

Looks like we're both going to be unhappy then, huh?

 

[Nasty_Deeds]

I'm gonna hazard a guess here and say you've held many pairs of pants in your time.

Oh Hi Texguy
I've been meaning to ask, are you going to come out now that "don't ask, don't tell" has been repealed? You guys look just fabulous in those cute little berets. And don't listen to what those nasty ole' homophobes are saying about you, I think you are just fabulous.

 

[Texguy84]

Oh Hi Texguy
I've been meaning to ask, are you going to come out now that "don't ask, don't tell" has been repealed? You guys look just fabulous in those cute little berets. And don't listen to what those nasty ole' homophobes are saying about you, I think you are just fabulous.

I think what we can take away from this is that Nasty Deeds likes the Army guys

 

[Nasty_Deeds]

I think what we can take away from this is that Nasty Deeds likes the Army guys

And what is wrong with army guys? If you ever get to Ft. Hood, maybe you could drive down to Austin and we could party sometime?

 

[Texguy84]

And what is wrong with army guys? If you ever get to Ft. Hood, maybe you could drive down to Austin and we could party sometime?

Oh trust me, you're not my type. But I'm sure in a town like Austin, you find a lot of acceptance for your lifestyle choices.

 

[Nasty_Deeds]

Oh trust me, you're not my type. But I'm sure in a town like Austin, you find a lot of acceptance for your lifestyle choices.

I wasn't suggesting you and me, but I am sure we can find someone for you. Do you like top or bottom?

 

[Texguy84]

I wasn't suggesting you and me, but I am sure we can find someone for you. Do you like top or bottom?

To start with, I like the women. The woman can be on top or bottom as the mood strikes us.

But none of this has anything to do with the workplace, so maybe a conversation for another place and time.

 

[Nasty_Deeds]

To start with, I like the women. The woman can be on top or bottom as the mood strikes us.

But none of this has anything to do with the workplace, so maybe a conversation for another place and time.

I like women too, but what has that got to do with anything? If you like C&W, Austin can be a party every night.

 

[Texguy84]

I like women too, but what has that got to do with anything? If you like C&W, Austin can be a party every night.

Mmmm cowgirls. But unless the OP works on a farm or in a Texas Roadhouse, I think we're off topic

 

[Nasty_Deeds]

Mmmm cowgirls. But unless the OP works on a farm or in a Texas Roadhouse, I think we're off topic

Hon, this thread has been off-topic almost since it started. LOL

If you like cowgirls, we can swing both ways if you like. When I say party, I mean PARTEE.

 

[culloden]

I have lived in Texas, Colorado, Washington State and London, and I have never been in a company where someone wasn't fucking somebody. The key is being discreet. If you are discreet, no one cares.

Your point about discretion is probably true. But it does not eliminate the risk.

My bigger point was your claim that there is always some stud fucking half (or all) the women in an office. That's pure hyperbole. I have seen office romances happen, to be sure, both between single folks and married folks. But I have never worked in a place a Lothario so gifted as to be irresistible to even half the women.

 

[thirty]

You absolutely have the right to be here.

I also have the right to call you out on being a sexist ass, since that's not against forum rules either.

Looks like we're both going to be unhappy then, huh?

You don't have to worry about it if you by any chance had a look at my signature.

I simply set it a rule that I must be happy no matter what happens with few exceptions.

 

[Nasty_Deeds]

Your point about discretion is probably true. But it does not eliminate the risk.

My bigger point was your claim that there is always some stud fucking half (or all) the women in an office. That's pure hyperbole. I have seen office romances happen, to be sure, both between single folks and married folks. But I have never worked in a place a Lothario so gifted as to be irresistible to even half the women.

True, affairs don’t happen in every office, I was making an overemphasized point, but the fact is, office affairs are very common. However in most cases, the people involved have enough common sense to keep it discreet, and no one knows.

Last summer, the customer service manager in a company I am familiar with, (not where I work), was literally screwing half the women in his department. Not all at one time, but in occasional hook-ups. Most of the women in his department were married, and it was just a way for them to have a little extra-marital fun. Few people in the company actually knew about it; rather, it was one of those “wink wink” secrets.

Unfortunately, one of the new employees, (a young divorced mother), decided that she wanted to fall in love and marry this guy, and it did turn into a serious issue in the company. When it became public, he did lose his wife, (she divorced him); however, he had no intention of marrying this young woman.

To remedy the situation, the company immediately moved the manager to another department with a raise in pay, and over the next three months, (to avoid a sexual harassment lawsuit), the company built a case against the woman so she could be fired legitimately. (Late for work, days missed, minor mistakes that could cost the company money, minor conflicts with managers, normal things that we all do) Of course it isn’t fair, but that is how companies handle these situations to avoid sexual harassment lawsuits.

As well intended as the law may have been when enacted, sexual harassment complaints have nothing to do with sex or harassment; rather, sexual harassment lawsuits have become a payday for both lawyers and clients. Disgruntled employees, (and their lawyers), have discovered that companies will settle out-of-court rather than fight a protracted and expensive lawsuit. And being the case, preventing office affairs does not reduce the risk of sexual harassment complaints for most companies.

Addendum: the office stud doesn't actually have to be a "stud", just available.

 

[bailadora]

TAnd being the case, preventing office affairs does not reduce the risk of sexual harassment complaints for most companies.

But since the clause is standard in most paperwork that people have to sign the first day of work, it does make it much easier for companies to get rid of problem employees (male and female). It's the company's way of covering it's ass with the EEOC.

 

[Nasty_Deeds]

But since the clause is standard in most paperwork that people have to sign the first day of work, it does make it much easier for companies to get rid of problem employees (male and female). It's the company's way of covering it's ass with the EEOC.

No one ever said the world is fair.

 

[subwannabe]

I think there is a difference between the US and other countries. I guess we are more suehappy over here than other places so everyone has to protect their butts. I remember reading some kind of poll or survey before taken in France where French women were asked something about having to sleep with their bosses and a huge percentage didn't think there was anything wrong with that and that it was just part of the job. When then President Clinton got caught with his pants down, so to speak, the French really didn't understand what the big deal was.

 

[bailadora]

No one ever said the world is fair.

That's true. But it's precisely because companies are going to cover their asses that office romances/affairs are such a "swim at your own risk" sort of deal.

I don't know how many sexual harassment complaints you've handled, Nasty Deeds, but I can tell you that when I was in HR, there was more than one case when both parties were terminated, not just the female. Unless the employee in question has a stellar job performance, it's easier and more cost efficient to let him or her go.

And if/when the employee goes crying to the EEOC about wrongful termination, all the company has to to do is pull out the paperwork he/she signed the first day plus documentation supporting sexual harassment. That's usually sufficient proof and the employee is left both without a job AND unemployment benefits. Unemployment pay is not available to those who are terminated for justifiable (IE provable) reasons.

 

[bailadora]

As well intended as the law may have been when enacted, sexual harassment complaints have nothing to do with sex or harassment; rather, sexual harassment lawsuits have become a payday for both lawyers and clients. Disgruntled employees, (and their lawyers), have discovered that companies will settle out-of-court rather than fight a protracted and expensive lawsuit. And being the case, preventing office affairs does not reduce the risk of sexual harassment complaints for most companies.

It is true that some suits are nothing more than retaliation by a disgruntled employee. It is also true that sometimes there is a valid complaint.

But the same can be said of most laws. There are always going to be people who are out for a quick buck and who are going to utilize everything at their disposal to do so.

 

[Firefly69]

That's true. But it's precisely because companies are going to cover their asses that office romances/affairs are such a "swim at your own risk" sort of deal.

I don't know how many sexual harassment complaints you've handled, Nasty Deeds, but I can tell you that when I was in HR, there was more than one case when both parties were terminated, not just the female. Unless the employee in question has a stellar job performance, it's easier and more cost efficient to let him or her go.

And if/when the employee goes crying to the EEOC about wrongful termination, all the company has to to do is pull out the paperwork he/she signed the first day plus documentation supporting sexual harassment. That's usually sufficient proof and the employee is left both without a job AND unemployment benefits. Unemployment pay is not available to those who are terminated for justifiable (IE provable) reasons.

I'm curious-- Were a lot of the sexual harassment cases the result of affairs? I can see that being the case when theres bad feelings-- such as one person expecting more from an affair and not getting it.

However-- in my experience- sexual harassment charges occur more often among people who have never had any kind of actual sexual contact. Like a friend of mine, who reported a man for making very inappropriate comments, not only to her, but to a lot of other women as well.

Just from my own workplace observation-- I never saw a sexual harassment case between people who have had an actual sexual relationship or affair.

But then, I've never worked in HR so I really don't know how it is and am genuninely interested.

I agree that if it is because of an affair-- then its probably because someone is pissed off and wants to get back at the other one.

But it seems to me, that accusations of sexual harassment brought up AFTER having sex with that person, is kinda like crying over spilled milk. lol. Unless one of them is trying to end it- and the other one is pestering the other for more sex. Then I can see it.

Otherwise, I really do think that most workplace affairs end very quietly. I've seen several that have ended that way. No big fuss and the people worked well together.