Female Lit authors: How much unsolicited sexual advances have you dealt with as a result of your writing?

[Kelliezgirl]

I had already bowed out but then I got personally attacked. And now Kellie is continuing her attacks on me in my absence with false accusations.

You "bowed out" then came back to make a snarky remark about me.
Get down off the cross, we need the lumber.

 

[EmilyMiller]

Funny. My girlfriend says the same thing to me. Like, all the time.

See. Just proves it even more .

Em

 

[Djmac1031]

Just sayin’

Em

I'd plunder that booty.

 

[EmilyMiller]

Just sayin’

Em

Must write a story about a female pirate captain and her crew of girls pillaging a ship full of erotica writers .

Em

 

[EmilyMiller]

I'd plunder that booty.

Me too

 

[AwkwardlySet]

Must write a story about a female pirate captain and her crew of girls pillaging a ship full of erotica writers .

Em

I better be on that ship!

 

[StillStunned]

Must write a story about a female pirate captain and her crew of girls pillaging a ship full of erotica writers .

Em

Imagine their disappointment when they realise we're mostly a bunch of balding, overweight, middle-aged blokes who run out of breath after five minutes of action.

 

[AlexBailey]

What is Literotica?

Different venues have different rules. What is the ‘social contract’ here?

In normal society it’s inappropriate to walk around naked, in many places you can be prosecuted as a sex offender for exposing yourself. Some places allow nudity but are completely against any sexuality, and then there are swingers clubs and erotic themed clubs.

This site has many different ‘alcoves‘ and denizens for each, yet they are all within a site with an erotic theme.

Literotica is:
* a collection of erotic stories
* a place for writers to support each other
* a hook-up site
* a picture hub
* online erotic toy store
* web cam hub
* general social media network

People come here with different expectations and contribute in different ways, and keep in mind that it is not designed so the stories pay the bills.

Is there a standard for decency here, or does it simply come down to what each person will tolerate before they leave?

Is piling on and bashing those who step over lines our form of social justice? What defense is there for individuals besides the ignore list, or disallowing private messages?

 

[EmilyMiller]

Imagine their disappointment when they realise we're mostly a bunch of balding, overweight, middle-aged blokes who run out of breath after five minutes of action.

That’s what the plank is for .

Em

 

[Zootonius]

…the enjoyment means you are interested in the concept - not that you want to be a pirate. You’d be an awful pirate. Now think I could carry it off.

Arrr… shiver me timbers.

See!

Em

I first read that as you were imagining carrying @SimonDoom off like you were a pirate.

 

[Kelliezgirl]

There is a separation in being fascinated by something and actually wanting to do it. All the documentaries on serial killers is probably proof of that. People don't watch them because they want to be a serial killer.
We don't assume crime or horror writers are serial killers, but it is probably safe to assume they would be more open to questions/comments about those types of things.
Similarly, it's perfectly logical to assume people who are in an environment where they are more open about sex and sexuality would be more open to questions or comments about it.
The guardrails are just in different places, unfortunately some people think there aren't any guardrails.

 

[MediocreAuthor]

Must write a story about a female pirate captain and her crew of girls pillaging a ship full of erotica writers .

Em

Wouldn't that be too close to noncon for you, Em?

Leave that story to the noncon authors, like me

 

[EmilyMiller]

I first read that as you were imagining carrying @SimonDoom off like you were a pirate.

The idea that 5’1” me could carry Simon is a little fanciful .

Em

 

[EmilyMiller]

Wouldn't that be too close to noncon for you, Em?

Leave that story to the noncon authors, like me

No. It’s OK if girls are doing the pillaging.

Once more is a joke.

Em

 

[Kelliezgirl]

What is Literotica?

Different venues have different rules. What is the ‘social contract’ here?

In normal society it’s inappropriate to walk around naked, in many places you can be prosecuted as a sex offender for exposing yourself. Some places allow nudity but are completely against any sexuality, and then there are swingers clubs and erotic themed clubs.

This site has many different ‘alcoves‘ and denizens for each, yet they are all within a site with an erotic theme.

Literotica is:
* a collection of erotic stories
* a place for writers to support each other
* a hook-up site
* a picture hub
* online erotic toy store
* web cam hub
* general social media network

People come here with different expectations and contribute in different ways, and keep in mind that it is not designed so the stories pay the bills.

Is there a standard for decency here, or does it simply come down to what each person will tolerate before they leave?

Is piling on and bashing those who step over lines our form of social justice? What defense is there for individuals besides the ignore list, or disallowing private messages?

Very well said!

 

[MediocreAuthor]

No. It’s OK if girls are doing the pillaging.

THAT'S WHY YOU NEED TO READ ELDRITCH PACT, HOLEY FUCK!!!

 

[EmilyMiller]

THAT'S WHY YOU NEED TO READ ELDRITCH PACT, HOLEY FUCK!!!

I know.

Now be careful. I am finding your aggressive pursuit of me discombobulating.



Em

 

[MediocreAuthor]

Is there a standard for decency here, or does it simply come down to what each person will tolerate before they leave?

Not to sound glib, but I think we can all agree on the common ground that as soon as you've upset or irritated a reasonable person with your actions, then you've failed to maintain decency.

I think that most of us can agree that overt, unrequested sexual communication is indecent.

 

[MediocreAuthor]

I know.

Now be careful. I am finding your aggressive pursuit of me discombobulating.



Em

If you hadn't promised, I wouldn't be pestering. Lol

 

[EmilyMiller]

If you hadn't promised, I wouldn't be pestering. Lol

I know. If it’s any comfort. It’s not just you.

Em

 

[IsabellaEmily]

Well I got my first request for nude photos last night as a result of my writing. I was offered a fairly high amount, but I politely declined as I refuse to be known as a woman who sells pictures of her tits online.

That led me to think about him many sexual advances I've delt with (as a direct result of my writing).

So far, I can recall roughly

1 request for nude photos.
1 uncomfortable request for "more" photos, although nudity was never specifically mentioned.
1 dick pic.
Maybe about 5-6 requests for sexual roleplay/sexting (in spite of the fact that my bio clearly states that I'm not interested in roleplay with fans).

That's honestly not that bad, considering I've been at this for a year or so.

I'm curious to know how much of this solicitation other female authors have dealt with (guys are welcome to chime in with relevant anecdotes as well, I suppose).

I get asked sometimes for more nudes. Not on a regular basis or anything, but since I have a picture on my profile and another here on the message boards they often want to know if I have more and want me to share them if I do. I usually ignore those requests, unless it's someone I've chatted with before, or someone who is aggressively rude.

More frequently I get asked about engaging in some sort of roleplay or correspondence, here on the message boards or through email. Those I often respond to and let them know it's not my thing.

I did once get a few dick pics, but those were in response to a poem I published here making fun of dick pics, so I think the guy who sent them felt obligated to defend the sending of unsolicited dick pics. His messages were weird too, so I could never tell if he was sincerely trying to impress me or what. I just ignored him.

 

[EmilyMiller]

I am not an author but have enjoyed stories on here for years and have tried my hand at writing some myself (although I fear writer's block, time, and an overall hesitancy has made that improbable. I was just starting to read

https://www.literotica.com/s/harper-s-reckoning by @EmilyMiller

when I had to enter a meeting at work.

One thought though.... I have always wondered exactly what this thread is intending to discuss. I know as a woman who's been in the chat rooms and only just recently began to travel through the forum, that there are days where I have many PMs/Dms from men who obviously haven't bothered to read my profile. I know many of you have handled this with grace and it's inspiring.

I guess that's it. I don't know where I was going with this post. I just wanted to say that.

E.

The main thing is to get back to the story

Em

 

[EmilyMiller]

I get asked sometimes for more nudes (in addition to the pic on my profile and the other here on . Not on a regular basis or anything, but since I have a picture on my profile and another here on the message boards they often want to know if I have more and want me to share them if I do. I usually ignore those requests, unless it's someone I've chatted with before, or someone who is aggressively rude.

More frequently I get asked about engaging in some sort of roleplay or correspondence, here on the message boards or through email. Those I often respond to and let them know it's not my thing.

I did once get a few dick pics, but those were in response to a poem I published here making fun of dick pics, so I think the guy who sent them felt obligated to defend the sending of unsolicited dick pics. His messages were weird too, so I could never tell if he was sincerely trying to impress me or what. I just ignored him.

This can be such a weird place!

Em

 

[SimonDoom]

The idea that 5’1” me could carry Simon is a little fanciful .

Em

Especially now. I'm 6 feet tall and I'm not going to say what I weigh, but let's just say I'm at the beginning of my 3-month diet plan.

 

[JCSTREET]

By posting stories on Lit, you are a sex worker. We are all sex workers. Unpaid, perhaps, but sex workers nonetheless. Let's tap the brakes on besmirching other sex workers who do make their living selling pictures of their tits.

To answer the actual question, no. Never once in... nearly 10 years, unless you count my girlfriend.

I disagree that writing erotica automatically classes one as a 'sex worker' in the same vein as one would be for selling nude or partially nude pix. Countless gazillions of people walk around with thoughts that would have them damned utterly in their communities, were they ever to become public (I'm sure the Zuck will invent a gadget to make that so). Yet, most of those people would be horrified, or at least discomfited. by any request involving intimate pix of their bods. OTOH I think nude/partially nude pix are delightful if I am having on ongoing, pleasant conversation with a women (and, on occasions but not for years, with a man). Motive is also an interesting factor in this debate. Is anyone who transmits nude pictures merely an exhibitionist or are they hungry. Are they saving up for a sex robot or (in the old days) an IBM Selectric. Are they sending nudies because they like their correspondent or feel sorry for him or her and send some pleasant fap material for his or her delectation. Just saying that i don't see a necessary equivalence twixt erotic writing and sending people erotic pictures for pay, though being as voyeuristic as the next guy. I mourned the death of Tumbler's erotic pix channels and the evolution of wifelovers dot com into just another commercial site. I think I'm disappearing down a rabbit hole here so I'll stop, for now. However, as a final note guys - dick pix are tactical but words woven into pleasant tapestries are strategic.