Filthy answers to innocent questions.

[bbcbarry9033]

With a Flash drive, standing near the window.

What happened to my toilet brush?

I've heard it called a lot of things and I gotta say I'm not a fan of "toilet brush".
My favourite name for it is "fur burger" as in: What happened to your fur burger? I ate it!

What's under the sea?

 

[MargotPayge]

What's under the sea?

The deeper you go, the wetter it gets.

Where does bacon come from?

 

[bbcbarry9033]

The deeper you go, the wetter it gets.

Where does bacon come from?

Who cares? it's the other white meat and I loves me some white meat!

What doesn't taste like chicken?

 

[Tio_Narratore]

Who cares? it's the other white meat and I loves me some white meat!

What doesn't taste like chicken?

Labial juices. The lubricants produced by Skene's and Bartholin's gland in the vulval labia are composed mostly of glucose and fructose; that's why cunnilinguists often exclaim "how sweet it is!" Chicken is very low in these sugars, and therefore doesn't merit such exclamations.

Why is it called Coney Island?

 

[vagrantx]

Why is it called Coney Island?

Was supposed to be Cunny Island. They'd already paid for most of the signage before figuring that one out.

What is the average air speed velocity of a laden swallow?

 

[Tio_Narratore]

Was supposed to be Cunny Island. They'd already paid for most of the signage before figuring that one out.

What is the average air speed velocity of a laden swallow?

If she doesn't like it on the way down her esophagus, the load could be ejected at an initial velocity of as high as 140 mph.

Why do you see so many swallows at Capistrano?

 

[nerdboy1000]

If she doesn't like it on the way down her esophagus, the load could be ejected at an initial velocity of as high as 140 mph.

Why do you see so many swallows at Capistrano?

There's a big bowl of little blue pills on every nude beach.

What happens when the moon hits your eye like a big pizza pie?

 

[NC_Coastal]

Dean Martin sings at your funeral.

How do you solve a problem like Maria?

 

[MargotPayge]

How do you solve a problem like Maria?

Fuck her.

What do you do with a drunken sailor?

 

[Bamagan]

Fuck her.

What do you do with a drunken sailor?

The answer to this is also fuck.

What's the best aroma of scented candle?

 

[Noor]

The answer to this is also fuck.

What's the best aroma of scented candle?

Unscented

Should clothing be option in public?

 

[BlueEyes1969]

Unscented

Should clothing be option in public?

No! It should be mandatory!

Why do people wear hats?

 

[bbcbarry9033]

No! It should be mandatory!

Why do people wear hats?

To keep the sun off their dicks at nude beaches, the bigger the hats... That's also why Mexicans wear sombreros.

Who is the Son of Sol?

 

[nerdboy1000]

To keep the sun off their dicks at nude beaches, the bigger the hats... That's also why Mexicans wear sombreros.

Who is the Son of Sol?

The person who taught me to say "It's all good, man" after I spurted all over someone's face.

Would you pass the salt?

 

[BlueEyes1969]

Only if I had it in my diet.

Why do people eat carrots?

 

[Tio_Narratore]

Only if I had it in my diet.

Why do people eat carrots?

Because it's healthier than sticking them up their asses.

Why did Helen come with Paris?

 

[BlueEyes1969]

You'd come, too if he put his enormous rod to work!

Why should you eat a banana every day?

 

[Tio_Narratore]

It's good practice for the real thing.

Why do some circus performers swallow swords?

 

[BlueEyes1969]

To practice for deep throating a pointed man-rod!

Why do clowns learn to juggle?

 

[bbcbarry9033]

To practice for deep throating a pointed man-rod!

Why do clowns learn to juggle?

Same reason. The best deep throaters will also juggle the balls.

Why do lion tamers use chairs?

 

[MargotPayge]

Why do lion tamers use chairs?

To sit in. Taming wild pussy is a hard job.

How did crazy cat lady become a thing?

 

[nerdboy1000]

To sit in. Taming wild pussy is a hard job.

How did crazy cat lady become a thing?

She was doused in burning chemicals and the only place she could go to put them out was a pile of horny tomcats.

Being covered in cat jizz would make you crazy too.

Why were the hamsters dancing?

 

[lizard_lix]

Because they know that they are going up some guy's ass!

What is that in your shirt pocket?

 

[Lilianna23]

Because they know that they are going up some guy's ass!

What is that in your shirt pocket?

It's not a gun; I'm just happy to see you!

Why do start twinkle?

 

[BlueEyes1969]

No. I like the speedos at the pool!

Why do people eat broccoli?