Fuck, Marry, Kill

[SirConradPeckereye]

Fuck @Whiskeyjack because we got drunk.
Marry @Bry1313 because I want to make his life hell and then he would have to stare lovingly into my eye.
Kill @AuntieDisco so I can claim the inheritance and she gets NOTHING!

 

[OrdinaryPerson]

Fuck @AuntieDisco cause duh
Marry @SirConradPeckereye to see if he will get tire of the bad seal jokes
Kill @SirConradPeckereye after he doesn't

 

[SirConradPeckereye]

Fuck @AuntieDisco so she will quit hating on me.
Marry @OrdinaryPerson to get her out of that closet and the last name 'Peckereye'.
Kill @Bry1313 for his hating mornings ways.

 

[haha_on_me]

Fuck you up, fuck you over, then just fuck it, @SirConradPeckereye

Marry, @OrdinaryPerson

kill, @SirConradPeckereye because he showed up twice.

 

[Bry1313]

Fuck @haha_on_me hoping for a grilled cheese afterwards
Marry @Evil_jasmine
Kill @Evil_jasmine before she kills me in our marital bed

 

[crazychemgirl]

Fuck @Evil_jasmine
Marry @Bry1313
Kill @haha_on_me

 

[OrdinaryPerson]

Fuck @Evil_jasmine, she seems like she would be a fun fuck
Marry @crazychemgirl to forever nestle myself in her boobs and be rich together from Bry's life insurance
Kill @Bry1313 by smiting. See what the fuss is about

 

[OrdinaryPerson]

I so am. If you survive it.

no risk, no reward

 

[Deleted member 6568729]

I guess I don't have any choose but to...

Fuck @Evil_jasmine
And marry then kill @OrdinaryPerson, after taking out a hefty insurance policy and waiting the appropriate amount of time

 

[EricaLynch]

Fuck @OrdinaryPerson
Marry @Indie
Kill @Evil_jasmine (she'll come back to life though)

 

[deefalttwunnyfor]

Fuck OP
Marry Indie
Super reluctantly kill Erica. Like the ending of Old Yeller or Of Mice and Men or something

 

[Mr_bogey]

Fuck @deefalttwunnyfor and record it for @StillRain so I can see her boobs
Marry @Indie - she's nice, or so I'm told
Sorry @EricaLynch but I'm afraid your time is up. I didn't want to do it but

 

[Wand3rlust]

Fuck @deefalttwunnyfor
Marry @EricaLynch
Kill @Mr_bogey

 

[EricaLynch]

Fuck @deefalttwunnyfor
Marry @Wand3rlust (because we'd be good together, I think)
Kill @Mr_bogey (turnabout and all)

 

[jenn89]

Fuck @Wand3rlust
Marry @EricaLynch
Kill @Mr_bogey sorry

 

[13Fantasies]

Fuck @jenn89
Marry @Wand3rlust
Kill @EricaLynch

 

[Bry1313]

Fuck @EricaLynch since she doesn’t always kill me
Marry @jenn89 i just like the number
Kill @Mr……ooops, wanted in on that, sorry @13Fantasies but it’s your turn

 

[Lindi37]

Well, this is awkward
Fuck @Bry1313 sorry
Marry @13Fantasies sorry!
Kill @jenn89 you’re probably the fortunate one here

 

[Taegul]

I'm going to fuck Lindi.
I guess I then have to marry 13fantasies. Sexless marriage of course.
Then I'm gonna kill Bry, but before I do I'm going to fuck Lindi again.
Then I murder Bry.
But Bry survives my murder attempt and is hospitalized.
So I go back to fuck Lindi a 3rd time at the hospital with a paralyzed and helpless Bry watching.
Afterwards, we both use pillows to finish Bry off.

R.I.P.

 

[LupineOne]

I'm going to fuck Lindi.
I guess I then have to marry 13fantasies. Sexless marriage of course.
Then I'm gonna kill Bry, but before I do I'm going to fuck Lindi again.
Then I murder Bry.
But Bry survives my murder attempt and is hospitalized.
So I go back to fuck Lindi a 3rd time at the hospital with a paralyzed and helpless Bry watching.
Afterwards, we both use pillows to finish Bry off.

R.I.P.

You win. That’s it. End of thread
Thanks for making me laugh!

 

[Mr_bogey]

Fuck Lindi
Marry lupine and for a wedding present I will ask him to hunt down and kill Taegul while Lindi and I play some more.

PS why did I get the @Bry1313 treatment earlier? Totally uncalled for.

 

[Kitty_so_frisky]

Fuck @Mr_bogey
Marry @LupineOne for his snowy farm and skill in the...kitchen
Kill @Taegul for his terrible taste in baseball teams and pizza toppings

 

[Deleted member 1498366]

Fuck @LupineOne
Marry @Kitty_so_frisky
Kill @Mr_bogey for acting like @Bry1313 when he’s killed

 

[AuntieDisco]

Fuck @Kitty_so_frisky
Marry @EnbyKnight
Kill @Mr_bogey with sex

 

[Bry1313]

Fuck @EnbyKnight even though they besmirched me
Keep marrying @AuntieDisco because fun
Kill @Kitty_so_frisky because she questioned my pork butt