Georgia directory?
- Thread starter heterotic
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Dirty_Angel26
On my knees
- Joined
- Nov 29, 2003
- Posts
- 4,999
Goodmorning everyone! I hope you all are staying warm. I am off work and I am going to relax.I'll be on and off if anyone wants to chat.
Gator... Work is going good. And yes I am still covered in icing, I need your assistance.
Sga.. Still plenty of icing left...Want some?
Gator... Work is going good. And yes I am still covered in icing, I need your assistance.
Sga.. Still plenty of icing left...Want some?
good morning everyone
ty gator for defeanding us
but please don't be to hard on him like the rest of us loneliness gets to us sometime. wanna come keep me company?
vette would loive to get closer to chat sweety.
sga good to see you,and the cold is back!! you may wake up tonight to find me snuggled between ya.
DA im glad the new job is going well hun.
Jay wanna come over n see if we can find some leaves that was gotte up in the fall?
GG kissess sweety hope your day is going well
ladysdream please keep stopping in,you couldnt make better friends than whats right here.
ty gator for defeanding us
but please don't be to hard on him like the rest of us loneliness gets to us sometime. wanna come keep me company?vette would loive to get closer to chat sweety.
sga good to see you,and the cold is back!! you may wake up tonight to find me snuggled between ya.
DA im glad the new job is going well hun.
Jay wanna come over n see if we can find some leaves that was gotte up in the fall?
GG kissess sweety hope your day is going well
ladysdream please keep stopping in,you couldnt make better friends than whats right here.
sga_swingers
Really Really Experienced
- Joined
- Oct 10, 2003
- Posts
- 320
Now now boys. You have got to play nice together. I think I can handle you both
Bama, you know you are always welcome to come snuggle.
DA, would love to have some. Could you handle two tonges at once?
Bama, you know you are always welcome to come snuggle.
DA, would love to have some. Could you handle two tonges at once?
sga don/t be surprised if im not there one night when its so cold
dunno if I will get in trouble for this but I had to share
Click here: http://www.myshutter.com/flash/smiley-back.swf
dunno if I will get in trouble for this but I had to share
Click here: http://www.myshutter.com/flash/smiley-back.swf
is this all of us in a few more years??
An elderly Floridian called 911 on her cell phone to report that her
> car has been broken into. She is hysterical as she explains her
>situation to the dispatcher: "They've stolen the stereo, the
>steeringwheel, the brake pedal and even the accelerator!" she cried.
>The dispatcher said, "Stay calm. An officer is on the way." A few
>minutes later, the officer radios in. "Disregard." He says. "She got
> in the back-seat by mistake."
>_________________________________________________________
>
>"I CAN HEAR JUST FINE!"
>Three retirees, each with a hearing loss, were playing golf one fine
> March day. One remarked to the other, "Windy, isn't it?" "No," the
> second man replied, "it's Thursday." And the third man chimed in,
>"So am I. Let's have a beer."
>_______________________________________
>
>SUPERSEX
>
>An little old lady was running up and down the halls in a nursing
>home. As she walked, she would flip up the hem of her nightgown and
>say "Supersex." She walked up to an elderly man in a wheelchair.
>Flipping her gown at him, she said, "Supersex." He sat silently for
>a moment or two and finally answered, "I'll take the soup."
>_______________________________________
>
>ROMANCE
>An older couple were lying in bed one night. The husband was
>falling asleep but the wife was in a romantic mood and wanted to
>talk. She said: "You used to hold my hand when we were courting."
>Wearily he reached across, held her hand for a second and tried to
>get back to sleep. A few moments later she said: "Then you used to
>kiss me. "Mildly irritated, he reached across, gave her a peck on
>the cheek and settled down to sleep. Thirty seconds later she said:
>"Then you used to bite my neck." Angrily, he threw back the bed
>clothes and got out of bed. "Where are you going?" she asked. "To
>get my teeth!"
>
>_______________________________________
>
>DOWN AT THE RETIREMENT CENTER
>80-year old Bessie bursts into the rec room at the retirement home.
>She holds her clenched fist in the air and announces, "Anyone who
>can guess what's in my hand can have sex with me tonight!!" An
>elderly gentleman in the rear shouts out, "An elephant?" Bessie
>thinks a minute and says, "Close enough."
>
>_______________________________________
>
>OLD FRIENDS
>Two elderly ladies had been friends for many decades. Over the
>years, they had shared all kinds of activities and adventures.
>Lately, their activities had been limited to meeting a few times a
>week to play cards. One day, they were playing cards when one
>looked at the other and said, "Now don't get mad at me .. I know
>we've been friends for a long time ...but I just can't think of your
> name! I've thought and thought, but I can't remember it. Please
>tell me what your name is." Her friend glared at her. For at least
>three minutes she just stared and glared at her. Finally she said,
>"How soon do you need to know?"
>
>_________________________________ ______
>
>SENIOR DRIVING
>As a senior citizen was driving down the freeway, his car phone
>rang. Answering, he heard his wife's voice urgently warning him,
>"Herman, I just heard on the news that there's a car going the wrong
>way on Interstate 77. Please be careful!" "Hell," said Herman,
>"It's not just one car. It's hundreds of them!"
>
>______________________________________
>
>DRIVING
>Two elderly women were out driving in a large car - both could
>barely see over the dashboard. As they were cruising along, they
>came to an intersection. The stoplight was red, but they just went
>on through. The woman in the passenger seat thought to herself "I
>must be losing it. I could have sworn we just went through a red
>light." After a few more minutes, they came to another intersection
>and the light was red again. Again, they went right through. The
>woman in the passenger seat was almost sure that the light had been
>red but was really concerned that she was losing it. She was
>getting nervous . At the next intersection, sure enough, the light
>was red and they went on through. So, she turned to the other woman
>and said, "Mildred, did you know that we just ran through three red
>lights in a row? You could have killed us both!" Mildred turned to
>her and said, "Crap, am I driving?"
>
An elderly Floridian called 911 on her cell phone to report that her
> car has been broken into. She is hysterical as she explains her
>situation to the dispatcher: "They've stolen the stereo, the
>steeringwheel, the brake pedal and even the accelerator!" she cried.
>The dispatcher said, "Stay calm. An officer is on the way." A few
>minutes later, the officer radios in. "Disregard." He says. "She got
> in the back-seat by mistake."
>_________________________________________________________
>
>"I CAN HEAR JUST FINE!"
>Three retirees, each with a hearing loss, were playing golf one fine
> March day. One remarked to the other, "Windy, isn't it?" "No," the
> second man replied, "it's Thursday." And the third man chimed in,
>"So am I. Let's have a beer."
>_______________________________________
>
>SUPERSEX
>
>An little old lady was running up and down the halls in a nursing
>home. As she walked, she would flip up the hem of her nightgown and
>say "Supersex." She walked up to an elderly man in a wheelchair.
>Flipping her gown at him, she said, "Supersex." He sat silently for
>a moment or two and finally answered, "I'll take the soup."
>_______________________________________
>
>ROMANCE
>An older couple were lying in bed one night. The husband was
>falling asleep but the wife was in a romantic mood and wanted to
>talk. She said: "You used to hold my hand when we were courting."
>Wearily he reached across, held her hand for a second and tried to
>get back to sleep. A few moments later she said: "Then you used to
>kiss me. "Mildly irritated, he reached across, gave her a peck on
>the cheek and settled down to sleep. Thirty seconds later she said:
>"Then you used to bite my neck." Angrily, he threw back the bed
>clothes and got out of bed. "Where are you going?" she asked. "To
>get my teeth!"
>
>_______________________________________
>
>DOWN AT THE RETIREMENT CENTER
>80-year old Bessie bursts into the rec room at the retirement home.
>She holds her clenched fist in the air and announces, "Anyone who
>can guess what's in my hand can have sex with me tonight!!" An
>elderly gentleman in the rear shouts out, "An elephant?" Bessie
>thinks a minute and says, "Close enough."
>
>_______________________________________
>
>OLD FRIENDS
>Two elderly ladies had been friends for many decades. Over the
>years, they had shared all kinds of activities and adventures.
>Lately, their activities had been limited to meeting a few times a
>week to play cards. One day, they were playing cards when one
>looked at the other and said, "Now don't get mad at me .. I know
>we've been friends for a long time ...but I just can't think of your
> name! I've thought and thought, but I can't remember it. Please
>tell me what your name is." Her friend glared at her. For at least
>three minutes she just stared and glared at her. Finally she said,
>"How soon do you need to know?"
>
>_________________________________ ______
>
>SENIOR DRIVING
>As a senior citizen was driving down the freeway, his car phone
>rang. Answering, he heard his wife's voice urgently warning him,
>"Herman, I just heard on the news that there's a car going the wrong
>way on Interstate 77. Please be careful!" "Hell," said Herman,
>"It's not just one car. It's hundreds of them!"
>
>______________________________________
>
>DRIVING
>Two elderly women were out driving in a large car - both could
>barely see over the dashboard. As they were cruising along, they
>came to an intersection. The stoplight was red, but they just went
>on through. The woman in the passenger seat thought to herself "I
>must be losing it. I could have sworn we just went through a red
>light." After a few more minutes, they came to another intersection
>and the light was red again. Again, they went right through. The
>woman in the passenger seat was almost sure that the light had been
>red but was really concerned that she was losing it. She was
>getting nervous . At the next intersection, sure enough, the light
>was red and they went on through. So, she turned to the other woman
>and said, "Mildred, did you know that we just ran through three red
>lights in a row? You could have killed us both!" Mildred turned to
>her and said, "Crap, am I driving?"
>
sga_swingers
Really Really Experienced
- Joined
- Oct 10, 2003
- Posts
- 320
Bama, Love it!!! Thanks for the smile I needed it
I needed itThe Suicidal Blonde!
A blonde hurried into the emergency room late one night, with the tip of her index finger blown off. "How did this happen?", the doctor asked her.
"Well," the blonde replied, "I was depressed, and I was trying to commit suicide!" The doctor scratched his head. "What? You tried to commit suicide by shooting your FINGER off??"
"No, silly!" the blonde sighed. "First, I put the gun to my chest. Then I thought, boy, I just paid $5,000 for these breast implants, I'm not gonna shoot myself in the chest."
"Then I put the gun in my mouth. But I thought, huh, I just paid $2,500 to get my teeth straightened, no way, I'm not shooting myself in the mouth." "So then?" asked the doctor.
"Well, then I put the gun to my ear, and I thought, gee, this is going to make an awful loud noise! So I put my finger in the other ear before I pulled the trigger."
A blonde hurried into the emergency room late one night, with the tip of her index finger blown off. "How did this happen?", the doctor asked her.
"Well," the blonde replied, "I was depressed, and I was trying to commit suicide!" The doctor scratched his head. "What? You tried to commit suicide by shooting your FINGER off??"
"No, silly!" the blonde sighed. "First, I put the gun to my chest. Then I thought, boy, I just paid $5,000 for these breast implants, I'm not gonna shoot myself in the chest."
"Then I put the gun in my mouth. But I thought, huh, I just paid $2,500 to get my teeth straightened, no way, I'm not shooting myself in the mouth." "So then?" asked the doctor.
"Well, then I put the gun to my ear, and I thought, gee, this is going to make an awful loud noise! So I put my finger in the other ear before I pulled the trigger."
Dirty_Angel26
On my knees
- Joined
- Nov 29, 2003
- Posts
- 4,999
Bama.. That was cute.
Sga.. Two of them? MMMMMM
Sga.. Two of them? MMMMMM
Dirty_Angel26
On my knees
- Joined
- Nov 29, 2003
- Posts
- 4,999
Gator... three is even better!
Dirty_Angel26
On my knees
- Joined
- Nov 29, 2003
- Posts
- 4,999
bamagirl said:
Sure sweetie, I am sure they will have no objections
A little bird was flying south for the winter. It was so cold the bird froze and fell to the ground in a large field. While it was lying there, a cow came by and dropped some dung on it. As the frozen bird lay there in the pile of cow dung, it began to realize how warm it was. The dung was actually thawing him out! He lay there all warm and happy, and soon began to sing for joy. A passing cat heard the bird singing and came to investigate. Following the sound, the cat discovered the bird under the pile of cow dung, and >promptly dug him out and ate him. Morals of the Stories: 1) Not everyone who shits on you is your enemy. 2) Not everyone who gets you out of shit is your friend. 3) And when you're in deep shit, it's best to keep your mouth shut!
Morning , Beautiful !
It is Beautiful Woman Month, and that means you and me. I am supposed to send this to five beautiful women and you, of course, are one of them.
Facts on Figures : There are 3 billion women who don't look like super models and only eight who do.
Marilyn Monroe wore a size 14.
If Barbie was a real woman, she'd have to walk on all fours due to her proportions.
The average woman weighs 144 lb. and wears between a 12-14.
One out of every four college aged women has an eating disorder
The models in the magazines are airbrushed -- not perfect!
A psychological study in 1995 found that three minutes spent looking at a fashion magazine caused 70% of women to feel depressed, guilty, and shameful.
Models twenty years ago weighed 8% less than the average woman.
Today they weigh 23% less.
~Beauty of a Woman~
The beauty of a woman is not in the clothes she wears,
The figure she carries, or the way she combs her hair.
The beauty of a woman must be seen from her eyes,
Because that is the doorway to her heart,
The place where love reside! s.
The beauty of a woman Is not in a facial mole,
But true beauty in a woman is reflected in her soul.
It is the caring that she lovingly gives,
The passion that she shows
The beauty of a woman
With passing years -- only grows.
An English professor wrote the words, "Woman without her man is nothing," on the blackboard and directed the students to punctuate it correctly.
The men wrote: "Woman, without her man, is nothing."
The women wrote: "Woman! Without her, man is nothing."
The Images of Mother
4 YEARS OF AGE ~ My Mommy can do anything!
8 YEARS OF AGE ~ My Mom knows a lot! A whole lot!
12 YEARS OF AGE ~ My Mother doesn't really know quite everything.
14 YEARS OF A! GE ~ Naturally, Mother doesn't know that, either.
16 YEARS OF AGE ~ Mother? She's hopelessly old-fashioned.
18 YEARS OF AGE ~ That old wom an? She's way out of date!
25 YEARS OF AGE ~ Well, she might know a little bit about it.
35 YEARS OF AGE ~ Before we decide, let's get Mom's opinion.
45 YEARS OF AGE ~ Wonder what Mom would have thought about it?
65 YEARS OF AGE ~ Wish I could talk it over with Mom.
It is Beautiful Woman Month, and that means you and me. I am supposed to send this to five beautiful women and you, of course, are one of them.
Facts on Figures : There are 3 billion women who don't look like super models and only eight who do.
Marilyn Monroe wore a size 14.
If Barbie was a real woman, she'd have to walk on all fours due to her proportions.
The average woman weighs 144 lb. and wears between a 12-14.
One out of every four college aged women has an eating disorder
The models in the magazines are airbrushed -- not perfect!
A psychological study in 1995 found that three minutes spent looking at a fashion magazine caused 70% of women to feel depressed, guilty, and shameful.
Models twenty years ago weighed 8% less than the average woman.
Today they weigh 23% less.
~Beauty of a Woman~
The beauty of a woman is not in the clothes she wears,
The figure she carries, or the way she combs her hair.
The beauty of a woman must be seen from her eyes,
Because that is the doorway to her heart,
The place where love reside! s.
The beauty of a woman Is not in a facial mole,
But true beauty in a woman is reflected in her soul.
It is the caring that she lovingly gives,
The passion that she shows
The beauty of a woman
With passing years -- only grows.
An English professor wrote the words, "Woman without her man is nothing," on the blackboard and directed the students to punctuate it correctly.
The men wrote: "Woman, without her man, is nothing."
The women wrote: "Woman! Without her, man is nothing."
The Images of Mother
4 YEARS OF AGE ~ My Mommy can do anything!
8 YEARS OF AGE ~ My Mom knows a lot! A whole lot!
12 YEARS OF AGE ~ My Mother doesn't really know quite everything.
14 YEARS OF A! GE ~ Naturally, Mother doesn't know that, either.
16 YEARS OF AGE ~ Mother? She's hopelessly old-fashioned.
18 YEARS OF AGE ~ That old wom an? She's way out of date!
25 YEARS OF AGE ~ Well, she might know a little bit about it.
35 YEARS OF AGE ~ Before we decide, let's get Mom's opinion.
45 YEARS OF AGE ~ Wonder what Mom would have thought about it?
65 YEARS OF AGE ~ Wish I could talk it over with Mom.
sga_swingers
Really Really Experienced
- Joined
- Oct 10, 2003
- Posts
- 320
Gee! What did we do? Did we run everybody off today?
Sure is quite
Sure is quite
Dirty_Angel26
On my knees
- Joined
- Nov 29, 2003
- Posts
- 4,999
I hope everyone is having a wonderful day. And an even better night.
Jayzan
Literotica Guru
- Joined
- Oct 30, 2003
- Posts
- 711
Hello everyone,
Sga, of course we're going to fight over you. Have you ever seen the Tarzan shows? well if you have, you know Jayzan has no fear over gators. I am lord of my domain! However, I think it will be a lot more fun with the two of us on you. He's above you, and I'm below you. You just say the word, and we'll meet in the middle. Thats about where you are.
Bama, you get the leaves ready, and I'll bring the fire to burn them. Of course as hot as we can make it, we wont need any fire. The heat from our bodies will do the job. By the way, if you want to put a smile on the gator, just rub his belly. Have you ever seen a deewee on a gator, me neither, it must be pretty small.
Vette, where are you sunshine, I need you today. It's cold out there this morning. I hope all is going well with you. If it's not, just let me know and I'll bring the Dr. bag.
Hey angel, hope your days are going well. I miss our little dirty talks. Where's my bucket this morning?
Sga, of course we're going to fight over you. Have you ever seen the Tarzan shows? well if you have, you know Jayzan has no fear over gators. I am lord of my domain! However, I think it will be a lot more fun with the two of us on you. He's above you, and I'm below you. You just say the word, and we'll meet in the middle. Thats about where you are.
Bama, you get the leaves ready, and I'll bring the fire to burn them. Of course as hot as we can make it, we wont need any fire. The heat from our bodies will do the job. By the way, if you want to put a smile on the gator, just rub his belly. Have you ever seen a deewee on a gator, me neither, it must be pretty small.
Vette, where are you sunshine, I need you today. It's cold out there this morning. I hope all is going well with you. If it's not, just let me know and I'll bring the Dr. bag.
Hey angel, hope your days are going well. I miss our little dirty talks. Where's my bucket this morning?
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