Good Girl!

[SweetCherry]

Oh, I so dig the good girl bit. It's awesome hearing i whispered in my ear, especially when I'm weeping right after a particularly awesome cropping/flogging.

 

[intothewoods]

Approval....Wow, I have a lot to say about this.

I love for people to like me. I love to make people happy, and I love for them to want me around.

But, on the other hand, I'm used to having people dislike me and not want me around because I'm apparently one of those personality types that make most other personality types uncomfortable. So I've given up giving a shit about pleasing random people around me.

I'm kinda like Netz. Even Toppy me thrives on approval from subs I genuinely like. Bottomy me, doubly so. "Good girl" will generally just make me roll my eyes, but I do like expressions of pleasure. You have to have some real panache to pull off saying "good girl" to me without making yourself look like a moron, and most people just don't have it.

Heh heh. Well, it's not like every Tom, Dick and Harry can say "good girl"!

 

[BiBunny]

Heh heh. Well, it's not like every Tom, Dick and Harry can say "good girl"!

True. I find that even most Domly types can't pull it off. But then, I tend not to be terribly impressed by most people who call themselves Doms, either.

 

[intothewoods]

True. I find that even most Domly types can't pull it off. But then, I tend not to be terribly impressed by most people who call themselves Doms, either.

Me either.

 

[BiBunny]

Me either.

Heh. Great minds.

 

[kitten]

When he says I'm a good kitten, I know that I've done well, and that he approves... And it makes me so happy. It is fairly rare, but it means so much to me. It gives me happy little tingles all over-- that's the only way I can describe it.

 

[Velvet Bubbles]

.. Does anyone else like the good girl/boy thing?

Oh yes! I live for the moments he tells me that. But I prefer silver stars.

 

[YourCaptor]

I love having a good girl, sweet hearts they are, I would also like to have a good boy some day.

I recently had reason to honor someone with this merit.

 

[LittleJade]

When he says "good girl" my insides twist up in this weird butterfly/happy/yay! feeling.... and when he calls me "hija", I just melt.

Plain and simple.

 

[Guest]

Good Girl.

*shiversome*

 

[Luna_Wolf72]

I go weak in the knees for the phrase "good girl." Today, Mister Man said I earned myself a gold star, and I got so excited! So I figure 5 gold stars should get me something, right? I mean, that's how it works. He replied, yes, a play date with me at a party. Hurrah!

In my mind, there is nothing as satisfying as a gold star. Well, except 5 gold stars, apparently.

It just all reminds me of happy times and being the favorite. Apples for the teacher, new school clothes. I love channeling my inner Hermione.

Does anyone else like the good girl/boy thing?

I come to this from the other side. I love to whisper *my girl* or *good girl* to my s/o (when I have one). To watch her face flush with pride and pleasure...or to hear the little shivery sigh and moan if I happen to be a bit busy at the time that I say it. Baby girl is another thing I say to those I love..but Mine, My girl, my good girl??? They are special and only said when I feel those words are merited or needed to be heard by my baby girl.

 

[tickety_tock]

Just an example, I was cutting down on caffeine and when I informed my thesis supervisor (who of course I look up to) he told me I was a good girl. I was heaven for hours after.

Would you like to exchange advisers? Please? mine just usually shoves the ravaged remains of whatever draft i've sent her under my office door when she's through with it. i have absolutely no personal or sexual interest in her whatsoever, but i still crave the gold star.

But to get back to the point, i'm a sucker for "good girl" too.

 

[ShyVixen]

Would you like to exchange advisers? Please? mine just usually shoves the ravaged remains of whatever draft i've sent her under my office door when she's through with it. i have absolutely no personal or sexual interest in her whatsoever, but i still crave the gold star.

It seems like I'm quite lucky in the sense my supervisor is a sweetie. We usually end up talking about travelling or NFL. lol I always get a Domly vibe from him...most likely why he can get away with calling me a 'good girl'.

 

[the captians wench]

I'm a needy little thing and my PYL(s) and tops know it

I need that almost constant reasurance that I am being pleasing. Infact, there was one time I was texting with one here and he didn't say "good pet" as his reply, which he usually would in that situation. So I inquired about it, and he informed me that I know I'm a good pet, he doesn't need to say it all the time. To which I responded, yes but I like hearing it.

Jounar's favorite thing he every said to me was "baby you're a star". It was on the phone, in his dreamy accent *giggles*, just after a good session of fun and a ceramoney where I gave him my orgasms. I believe that was the first time he said "I love you" over the phone as well.

Even my tops know that if they don't let me know I'm doing well, I get discouraged and eventually stop trying. As long as they tell me, "you're doing this really good" but perhaps give me some guides on how to improve on something, I'm cool, and I'll work hard to please them. Once I feel unapriciated, I'm done with him.

 

[catalina_francisco]

Have to say it is not a favourite of mine, and gold or silver star awards would just make it even more distasteful on a personal level. Maybe it takes me back to childhood and such things too much for comfort, dunno, just know it doesn't give me tingles of pleasure or keep me listening and hoping for more...quite the opposite. Thankfully F doesn't seem to have it in his repertoire either so all is good.

That being said, if he knows I have been going through a particularly difficult patch (can be healthwise, slave like, or just life in general), and he either stretches my limits significantly, or notices I have been quietly doing things extremely well, he will make a comment to let me know he has noticed and appreciates it. It doesn't happen often nor always, but it happens occasionally. Problem I have when that happens is I often push myself even harder more so than take a breather or simply continue in the manner I have been....and sometimes that can have a negative outcome for me and ultimately him.

Catalina

 

[VelvetDarkness]

Master doesn't say 'good girl' to me. He's younger than I am and for some reason it squicks me a little like calling him 'Daddy' would.

He does call me 'pet' or 'his pet' when he's pleased with me and it gives me the same feeling of mushy, romantic euphoria. Because I am his slave, his property, Master does not call me 'pet' all the time. Unless and until he feels I have earned his affection, to be his 'pet' is a pretension and an honour that I have no automatic right to.

Because of this, it's a very special thing for me when he calls me 'pet.' It's almost the same as when he says he loves me. It's only done sporadically, when he feels particularly close to me romantically and because of that, it never loses its meaning and specialness.

On a day to day basis, what I usually get is 'you're not such a worthless little bitch after all, carry on like that and I'll keep you around.' Perversely, because it's an expression of approval, it always makes me smile.

 

[VelvetDarkness]

You have to have some real panache to pull off saying "good girl" to me without making yourself look like a moron, and most people just don't have it.

Ditto. 90% of the time it just makes me laugh in a rather unsubmissive fashion. It's almost a thrown gauntlet to my inner sammy and my reflex response is to take the piss and hang the consequences.

Love your new av btw, you look fucking hawt.

 

[intothewoods]

Have to say it is not a favourite of mine, and gold or silver star awards would just make it even more distasteful on a personal level. Maybe it takes me back to childhood and such things too much for comfort, dunno, just know it doesn't give me tingles of pleasure or keep me listening and hoping for more...quite the opposite. Thankfully F doesn't seem to have it in his repertoire either so all is good.

That being said, if he knows I have been going through a particularly difficult patch (can be healthwise, slave like, or just life in general), and he either stretches my limits significantly, or notices I have been quietly doing things extremely well, he will make a comment to let me know he has noticed and appreciates it. It doesn't happen often nor always, but it happens occasionally. Problem I have when that happens is I often push myself even harder more so than take a breather or simply continue in the manner I have been....and sometimes that can have a negative outcome for me and ultimately him.

Catalina

I get that. It's not an all the time thing for me, but there is something very innocent and playful about the good girl thing that really resonates for me. I think I'm so in charge in the rest of my life, especially as the mom to a little one, that I do relish having the safe place with him to go there.

 

[catalina_francisco]

I get that. It's not an all the time thing for me, but there is something very innocent and playful about the good girl thing that really resonates for me. I think I'm so in charge in the rest of my life, especially as the mom to a little one, that I do relish having the safe place with him to go there.

LOL, I would have to say probably because I am so in charge of everything that is a big part of why it wouldn't work for me. He expects me to run, arrange, handle, inform, serve, and present everything, even as far as reminding him of meetings etc., to me it would seem a little patronising and condescending under the circumstances if that makes sense. Even the inform thing has become an issue of only inform him if I am stuck with what to do...if not, he doesn't want to be overly bothered by knowing anything he can trust me to manage on my own...I choose to manage and never bother him with anything.

Catalina

 

[Daddyslilpet]

LOL, I would have to say probably because I am so in charge of everything that is a big part of why it wouldn't work for me. He expects me to run, arrange, handle, inform, serve, and present everything, even as far as reminding him of meetings etc., to me it would seem a little patronising and condescending under the circumstances if that makes sense. Even the inform thing has become an issue of only inform him if I am stuck with what to do...if not, he doesn't want to be overly bothered by knowing anything he can trust me to manage on my own...I choose to manage and never bother him with anything.

Catalina

I do much the same things as you and hearing those words works for me in the right context. I don't feel he's being condescending or patronising at all, just letting me know that he's pleased with me. However, our dynamics are slightly different from yours and Francisco's so that can make a world of difference in how we each react to those words. Doesn't make either one of us right or wrong, just happy in our own relationships as I see it. I think that's the great thing about what we do... how diverse it can be from one relationship to another... how absolutely boring it would be if every relationship looked the same, don't you agree?

 

[intothewoods]

LOL, I would have to say probably because I am so in charge of everything that is a big part of why it wouldn't work for me. He expects me to run, arrange, handle, inform, serve, and present everything, even as far as reminding him of meetings etc., to me it would seem a little patronising and condescending under the circumstances if that makes sense. Even the inform thing has become an issue of only inform him if I am stuck with what to do...if not, he doesn't want to be overly bothered by knowing anything he can trust me to manage on my own...I choose to manage and never bother him with anything.

Catalina

That makes perfect sense and is pretty informative about the nature of your relationship. While I know our relationship will never be like yours, I actually can see how I would look at like you do if and when we take the step to get married and have kids. Right now - he's my boyfriend. He says "good girl" to me when I see his favorite beer and buy it or something. But say we had two kids plus current kidlet and I fed and bathed them all and got them into bed and then he turned to me and said "good girl." Ha. Yes, that would be patronising! I might kill him, lol. It would definitely not fit under those circumstances.

Yet another instance in which I think to myself, okay, do you want this? Living with someone again. Being a real partner with him, and making a life with him. I think he's pretty fantastic, and am amazed I got so lucky, but I know I'm not so perfect and I am pretty demanding. Is it what I reallly want? I'm not there yet and that's okay for me. If I do this again, and with him, I want to be ready and to really want it.

 

[Daddyslilpet]

That makes perfect sense and is pretty informative about the nature of your relationship. While I know our relationship will never be like yours, I actually can see how I would look at like you do if and when we take the step to get married and have kids. Right now - he's my boyfriend. He says "good girl" to me when I see his favorite beer and buy it or something. But say we had two kids plus current kidlet and I fed and bathed them all and got them into bed and then he turned to me and said "good girl." Ha. Yes, that would be patronising! I might kill him, lol. It would definitely not fit under those circumstances.

Yet another instance in which I think to myself, okay, do you want this? Living with someone again. Being a real partner with him, and making a life with him. I think he's pretty fantastic, and am amazed I got so lucky, but I know I'm not so perfect and I am pretty demanding. Is it what I reallly want? I'm not there yet and that's okay for me. If I do this again, and with him, I want to be ready and to really want it.

Don't let being married with kids define you. I'm about to celebrate my 20th anniversary with Daddy, and we have a three year old grandson... LOL. It's not about that, it's about your relationship dynamics and how you define them for yourself. Not how someone elses relationship works for them.

If it works for you then be happy about that and don't worry about what others think. You are the one that has to live your life not them.

 

[SweetGigi]

I know several people it doesn't work for as well. They, too, feel it is patronizing and condescending. But, then again these same people don't have any problem with being called filthy, dirty, sick, tywsted sluts, so I suppose it is all really relative.


My cuck gushes like a school boy, at 49, when I call him my 'precious little boy'. I never thought I could do it, seeing as how he is nearly 20 yrs my senior, but it has become second nature to me when he is good. He feeds off of it, so why deny him that little joy? That is unless I want to, that is.

 

[catalina_francisco]

I think that's the great thing about what we do... how diverse it can be from one relationship to another... how absolutely boring it would be if every relationship looked the same, don't you agree?

Absolutely...I think too often people feel they need to fit in and be like everyone else...problem is everyone else is not the same and so there are going to be differences in every relationship, thus impossible to mimic. For us I think it has been a progression thing, and the point we are at right now. He takes time when he wishes to, just to emphasise
what he appreciates and why, but it is not predictable nor daily. LOL, I tend to get more embarrassed than anything and try and change the subject on him.

Catalina

 

[catalina_francisco]

Yet another instance in which I think to myself, okay, do you want this? Living with someone again. Being a real partner with him, and making a life with him. I think he's pretty fantastic, and am amazed I got so lucky, but I know I'm not so perfect and I am pretty demanding. Is it what I reallly want? I'm not there yet and that's okay for me. If I do this again, and with him, I want to be ready and to really want it.

I think it is a valid thing to think about, but also as Daddyslilpet says, it doesn't have to define you. I am someone who thrives of plenty of time alone...F is not, so there are sometimes tense moments and there are moments when he appreciates it and gives me some space, though often not without a comment. It is a reason why I remained single so long after my divorce. I don't think any 2 people fit together so perfectly that there are never tense moments, add children and everyday life and it increases the possibility for bumps. Dynamics and communication both ways can make a huge difference.

Catalina