How Old Are You?

[MathGirl]

My avathingie

Diane-


And, sweet integrator, I am anticipating your next AV with..... delusional hope.

b, the eternal optimist

I'm back. See, your optimism, for once, was not misguided.

Diane the Chastened

 

[TheEarl]

Scene: Holly and Talkie Toaster are talking. Holly has just had her IQ boosted to 12,967 and wants Talkie to ask her a question to test it.

Holly: Ask me a question. Any question and I will answer.
Talkie: Any question? The existence of God? How to marry classical physics with quantum mechanics? Any question and you will answer?
Holly: Yes.
Talkie: Okay. Would you like a piece of toast.
Holly: You don't seem to understand. I have an IQ of 12,000. I know the meaning of the universe.
Talkie: That is not answering my question.
Holly<snapping>: No, I would not like a piece of toast! Now ask me a proper question.
Talkie: Do you know anything about chaos theory in predicting weather cycles?
Holly: I know everything there is to know about using chaos theory to predict weather cycles.
Talkie: Okay then, would you like a crumpet.
Holly: No, I would not like a crumpet! Now ask me a proper question. Preferably un-bread related.
Talkie: Okay. I have another question. A proper question. A question that will tax your new intellects to it's greatest width.
Holly<resigned>: This is going to be about waffles isn't it?
Talkie: Certainly not. And I resent the implication that I am a one dimesional toast obsessed machine.
Holly: I apologise toaster, what was hte question?
Talkie:Given that space is infinite. And God is also infinite.
Holly: Mmmm
Talkie: Would you like a toasted teacake?
Holly<exasperated>: That's another bready question.
Talkie: It's not wholly bready, it's slightly curranty too.
Holly: Ask me a question that is wholly unbready and not even slightly curranty.
Talkie: Okay. How come you IQ is now 12,000 when it was only supposed to go to six?
Holly: Good question. There was a calculation error. My intellect has expanded, but my runtime has exponentially reduiced.
Talkie: So how long have you got? <Reads figure off screen> 367 years, well, it's better than a kick in the breadtray.
Holly<alarmed>: You missed the decimal point.
Talkie: You have only 3.51 years to live?
Holly<panicked>: That's not years, that's minutes, 3.51 minutes.
Talkie: Well here's my next question, what the smeg are you going to do?
Holly: I'm going to preserve runtime and switch myself off. <image of Holly disappears>
Talkie: Before you go, there's an important question, the others will have to know.
Holly<reappearing>: What? What!?
Talkie: Would you like a piece of toast?

Yeah, I know. I really shouldn't be able to do that from memory.

Chicklet: Read the sig. The book is a dictionary.

Is it in the dictionary?

Well, it could be. If you were reading it in the nude and you close the book too quick: Jozxyqk!

That's how my av is linked to RD. It'll change soon though.

The Earl

 

[Chicklet]

Chicklet: Read the sig. The book is a dictionary.

omg

i totally didn't even see that it was a book

lol

chicklet

 

[TheEarl]

Hence why I'm changing it. Everyone seems to think it's a bit of wood. (unintentional double-entendre)

The Earl

 

[DVS]

Hence why I'm changing it. Everyone seems to think it's a bit of wood. (unintentional double-entendre)The Earl

Not a very large woodie, there bud.

Actually, if you could see the binding of the book, it would look more like a book.

Being a man, the picture doesn't bother me too much, but it does seem rather disturbing, being someone who has had his jewels racked more than once. Can you say Ouch?

 

[Justin_Thyme]

The Earl

Okay, so it's a dictionary. I still prefer to believe that, at your age, you have what it takes to split wood. Although clearly, it might be necessary to expand your horizon a bit in order to achieve a clean break.
Now then, I must thank SableDrake for enlightening me. Perhaps I can find the show on the BBC channel on satellite?

Justin Thyme

 

[TheEarl]

www.reddwarf.com They have a list of where you can see the show.

Well worth watching.

The Earl

 

[MathGirl]

Avocado

Hence why I'm changing it. Everyone seems to think it's a bit of wood. (unintentional double-entendre)

The Earl

Earl,

Your new avathingie makes no sense at all, but it's a HUGE improvement.

 

[SlickTony]

I'm afraid that as many channels as we have--and since my husband works for Comcast, we have the full package--we don't have Red Dwarf. We'd have found it and would be watching it if we did.

 

[Justin_Thyme]

Damn! Guess I'll have to try the 'net' then. Thanks Earl

 

[desturmur]

Too young to hold on.... and too old to just break free and run....

I am the delicate age of..... 21

 

[entitled]

i remember watching an episode of Red Dwarf once, at about 2 am on a school night on public TV during sweeps week. The only thing i remember about it was that they were on a planet where everybody did everything backwards and Cat had to pee at the end. Well, that and the fact i laughed until i nearly peed my pants.

 

[MathGirl]

Liebnitz-Newton

Diane-


And, sweet integrator, I am anticipating your next AV with..... delusional hope.

b, the eternal optimist

I's jista integratin' an'a differentiatin' ovah heah, Baas.

Diane the Complex Variable

 

[Crimson Knight]

If anyone know where I can get episodes of red dwarf on dvd or vhs, I would be deeply indebted. I used to be able to catch it late at night on PBS, but I haven't seen it in quite a while. I guess the British humor doesn't go over quite as well here in the deep south.

 

[MaxSebastian]

At the risk of straying from the Red Dwarf path

(Rimmer: Kryten, go to red alert
Kryten: Are you sure, sir? It will mean changing the bulb...)

I'm 24. The first movie I ever saw on the big screen was ET: The Extra Terrestrial. I don't remember much about it, but I remember thinking Drew Barrymore was pretty old and mature.

 

[Cuckolded_BlK_Male]

Re: The Earl

Okay, so it's a dictionary. I still prefer to believe that, at your age, you have what it takes to split wood. Although clearly, it might be necessary to expand your horizon a bit in order to achieve a clean break.
Now then, I must thank SableDrake for enlightening me. Perhaps I can find the show on the BBC channel on satellite?

Justin Thyme

The Boys from the Dwarf come on the local PBS station every Saturday night here ... right after "Are You Being Served" and directly before "Chef" and "Keep Up Appearances."

Let's go all the way up to Brown Alert!!!

 

[Cuckolded_BlK_Male]

If anyone know where I can get episodes of red dwarf on dvd or vhs, I would be deeply indebted. I used to be able to catch it late at night on PBS, but I haven't seen it in quite a while. I guess the British humor doesn't go over quite as well here in the deep south.

I know that you can download episodes of RedDwarf on KaZaA ... including the awful Pilot episode of the American version of RedDwarf.

Smeg-Pot

 

[Cuckolded_BlK_Male]

If anyone know where I can get episodes of red dwarf on dvd or vhs, I would be deeply indebted. I used to be able to catch it late at night on PBS, but I haven't seen it in quite a while. I guess the British humor doesn't go over quite as well here in the deep south.

Are you sure that it's the dry British humor and not Lister's shagging Christine Kochanski rotten that doesn't go over down there?

http://home.earthlink.net/~psterr2001/images/Christine.jpg

 

[MathGirl]

$%^(*&)_)(* Nazi

I know that you can download episodes of RedDwarf on KaZaA ... including the awful Pilot episode of the American version of RedDwarf.

Smeg-Pot

I do believe I'll boycott this particular thread as long as a certain avathingie is here.

Diane the HemiJew

 

[Svenskaflicka]

Bu$h was installed as dictator, not elected.
* opposes the International Criminal court. (which will surely indict him at some point)
* uses 9/11 as an excuse to trample the constitution (ala The burning of the Reichstag)
* "Homeland defense" is right out of Mein Kamf, the TIPS program amounts to a Gestapo
* following Hermann Goering's advice he uses an imaginary threat to national security to suspend freedoms and lull the people into "no think."
* about to send 10s of thousands of working class young Americans off to die so that he and his rich Oil buddies and Defense contractors, whose kids will be safely at Yale and Havard, will get ever richer on the blood of your sons.

If it looks like walks like Hitler and talks like Hitler, it's Hitler!

I also heard on a documentary that he has put all who are the least bit suspected for having something to do with "911" in a special prison on Cuban grounds, in order not to have to follow American laws for how to deal with prisoners. He also claims that these prisoners don't fall under the UN rules for how to treat prisoners of war, as they are not officially prisoners of war, but suspected terrorists.
No trial, no visitors, just chains and bully guards.

 

[SlickTony]

I suppose that in future years we'll look back on this period of history and recognize that we've gone overboard, as we did after the internment of the Japanese-Americans during WWII, but at this time it's hard to tell anybody anything.

 

[MathGirl]

Fucking Nazis

I can't believe that an avatar showing a Nazi slogan and swastica would be allowed on here.

I also can't believe that I'm the only one who finds it objectionable.

I'm probably the only one who had 3/8 of their great grandparents killed by those bastards.

 

[gauchecritic]

Re: Fucking Nazis

I can't believe that an avatar showing a Nazi slogan and swastica would be allowed on here.

I also can't believe that I'm the only one who finds it objectionable.

I'm probably the only one who had 3/8 of their great grandparents killed by those bastards.

Diane I think if you look closely and take into account the sig., you'll see that it's a picture of George 'Dubya' Bush and that it's meant to be a satire. I really don't believe that anyone is that spinelessly stupid to use something like that for any other reason. Do you?

Could never be THAT,

Gauche

 

[NoJo]

I celebrated my 44th birthday last year. (Which shows that I must be going senile, becuase I'm actually 78).

There was a thread about this, and I remember finding that 40 somethings are pretty common here.

 

[NoJo]

Re: Fucking Nazis

I can't believe that an avatar showing a Nazi slogan and swastica would be allowed on here.

I also can't believe that I'm the only one who finds it objectionable.

I'm probably the only one who had 3/8 of their great grandparents killed by those bastards.

No, you're not. And I object to your schikse AV.