Let's talk about sex baby...

[La damnee elle la licorne]

 

[ViciousTease]

I waited for a long time. My first time was still pretty terrible, but I waited until I was certain that it would be more than just that one time. I waited until I found someone that wanted all of me, not just the sexual parts. I waited for love. I don't regret that decision. I know that makes me a dork.

After the divorce? Well, I was over 25 so ... *wiggles eyebrows*

 

[suckonsimon]

Blow jobs. I'm gonna convert Aussie one day.

Just Aussie? We men invite you to take a global lecture tour and speak to millions of women everywhere!

 

[La damnee elle la licorne]

 

[lakesailer_mi]

I waited for a long time. My first time was still pretty terrible, but I waited until I was certain that it would be more than just that one time. I waited until I found someone that wanted all of me, not just the sexual parts. I waited for love. I don't regret that decision. I know that makes me a dork.

After the divorce? Well, I was over 25 so ... *wiggles eyebrows*

I waited too. Not so much because I wanted some certain experience, but because the type of woman that I was attracted to wasn't the type to "jump into bed." They were the type who believed in waiting, and they were the type I wanted.

Like others , I was a pretty late bloomer too.

I don't think being a late bloomer made me a better lover. Nor do I think it necessarily made my partner better.

That said, people should wait until they are ready. Whatever that means for them.

So, if waiting makes VT a "dork" does that make me a "dork lover?"

 

[Lunation]

Blow jobs. I'm gonna convert Aussie one day.

Actually I want to change my answer to Trekka's answer.

*copies over her shoulder*

I think it depends on the person.

Mio Maestro, my husband, knew he didn't want to get involved with someone 'for the sake of it' without real emotion and want for commitment attempt . He had mainly one night stands, a couple of Fwb. I was his first serious relationship and I'd like to think if didn't suggest a totally poor decision for him.

I was different, yet ended up with him and am extraordinarily lucky. I think we make what we make of our future.

I'm not trying to comment on anyone's individual circumstance. I'm glad you found each other.

I'm just saying, I think a few early heartbreaks would have done me good later. Easier to learn to crash on training wheels.

I waited for a long time. My first time was still pretty terrible, but I waited until I was certain that it would be more than just that one time. I waited until I found someone that wanted all of me, not just the sexual parts. I waited for love. I don't regret that decision. I know that makes me a dork.

After the divorce? Well, I was over 25 so ... *wiggles eyebrows*

Not a dork at all.

I waited too.

...for a tattooed business woman twice my age whose name I don't remember and who stayed up all night showing me how to eat pussy and find the g spot.

I retract my previous statement. My mistake was not marrying the first woman I slept with.

 

[suckonsimon]

^^^
sign me up on the 'dork-lover' list too, please. VT:

 

[La damnee elle la licorne]

 

[lakesailer_mi]

I have thought for a while that if I had the emotional turmoil of a few high school relationships I would have been better off. Been better at choosing a partner.

I'm just saying, I think a few early heartbreaks would have done me good later. Easier to learn to crash on training wheels.

Lunation,

I'm curious, you seem to indicate that it's the emotional turmoil of the HS relationships.

It seems to me what I learned from my (very few and not very intimate) high school relationships was more about what I liked in a partner. What traits I valued.


Just curious what you think would have helped.

 

[Lunation]

It was sort of my point that personal experience is personal and varies and doesn't necessarily relate to outcome.



I had relationships. I am not sure I have had 'heartbreak'. Yet. Relationships don't necessarily end that way . There is only so much in experience we can achieve and control. And NOTHING in retrospect, but tomorrow? That is ours! We can make decisions about how we approach future encounters and relationships.


As regards 'dork'. I find the whole shame languages of anyone's sexual difference, if is. I dentist and safe, a bit icky.

100% of marriages will end in either death or divorce. There's heartbreak no matter how you cut it. I could have done with an early lesson, myself. *shrug*

Lunation,

I'm curious, you seem to indicate that it's the emotional turmoil of the HS relationships.

It seems to me what I learned from my (very few and not very intimate) high school relationships was more about what I liked in a partner. What traits I valued.


Just curious what you think would have helped.

Well that would have helped certainly!

 

[La damnee elle la licorne]

 

[Lunation]

But training wheel relationships don't necessarily prepare for that! I am not even convinced all divorces are heartbreaks in fact.

Let me explain training wheel relationships.

In high school, there's no real expectation you're going to get married. I mean, some people do, others dream of it. But on average most people accept two high schoolers are not going to get married. They don't have parents badgering them to tie the knot. They're not attending friend's weddings together. It's generally accepted they're going to probably break up (that acceptance, both by them and their parents/friends are the training wheels). And eventually they learn how to break up.

Now say you're 25. You've never broken up with someone. You have no idea how to do it or what it's like. You're in a relationship which is 'ok enough.' Everyone bugs the shit out of you to get married. You're way more likely to end up in an unhappy marriage than someone who has experience breaking things off.

That's not how it went for you and your husband. Good for you, seriously!

But I think early experience ending things makes you more *likely* to end up with the right person.

We roll our eyes at highschoolers crying over the 'love of their life' whom they've known for a week. But that's important practice for being an adult. I feel I would have been better off with it.

But who knows?

 

[ViciousTease]

I didn't mean to imply that what anyone else has done or that the decisions they've made were wrong. My choices are certainly not right for everyone, but they are also the only experience I have to draw from. If I'm going to give advice to a young person considering sex, I'm going to speak only about what I know. I'm sure others would advise based on their own experiences. Ultimately, advice is just noise because everyone must make their own decisions.

 

[Trekka]

Let me explain training wheel relationships.

In high school, there's no real expectation you're going to get married. I mean, some people do, others dream of it. But on average most people accept two high schoolers are not going to get married. They don't have parents badgering them to tie the knot. They're not attending friend's weddings together. It's generally accepted they're going to probably break up (that acceptance, both by them and their parents/friends are the training wheels). And eventually they learn how to break up.

Now say you're 25. You've never broken up with someone. You have no idea how to do it or what it's like. You're in a relationship which is 'ok enough.' Everyone bugs the shit out of you to get married. You're way more likely to end up in an unhappy marriage than someone who has experience breaking things off.

That's not how it went for you and your husband. Good for you, seriously!

But I think early experience ending things makes you more *likely* to end up with the right person.

We roll our eyes at highschoolers crying over the 'love of their life' whom they've known for a week. But that's important practice for being an adult. I feel I would have been better off with it.

But who knows?

I getcha. My mom always called kiddie romance "practice." I think she was right.

And having gone through a divorce, whoa baby did I ever learn how to break up. And I'm fearless now. Go ahead and leave me. Go ahead and fuck it up: make me leave you. I'll be fiiiiiine.

I know this now.

I never knew this before.

Maybe some earlier epic break ups would've helped? But I am who I am because of the path I took so *shrugs* I'm good

 

[Lunation]

I didn't mean to imply that what anyone else has done or that the decisions they've made were wrong. My choices are certainly not right for everyone, but they are also the only experience I have to draw from. If I'm going to give advice to a young person considering sex, I'm going to speak only about what I know. I'm sure others would advise based on their own experiences. Ultimately, advice is just noise because everyone must make their own decisions.

For sure. Not trying to be critical.

Just chewing the fat, I guess. It's an interesting topic.

I getcha. My mom always called kiddie romance "practice." I think she was right.

And having gone through a divorce, whoa baby did I ever learn how to break up. And I'm fearless now. Go ahead and leave me. Go ahead and fuck it up: make me leave you. I'll be fiiiiiine.

I know this now.

I never knew this before.

Maybe some earlier epic break ups would've helped? But I am who I am because of the path I took so *shrugs* I'm good

Yeah whatever works. Seems you turned out pretty cool.

 

[ViciousTease]

For sure. Not trying to be critical.

Just chewing the fat, I guess. It's an interesting topic.



Yeah whatever works. Seems you turned out pretty cool.

You're talking relationships though, right? I was just talking about sex.

Relationships and heartache are tough lessons at any age, but I do think there are benefits to experiencing some level of that at a younger age. My first heartbreak was at 16. First of many. Where emotions are concerned, I'm a slow learner. If I'd waited on that stuff? Lordy, I'd still be a basket case.

 

[lakesailer_mi]

You're talking relationships though, right? I was just talking about sex.

Relationships and heartache are tough lessons at any age, but I do think there are benefits to experiencing some level of that at a younger age. My first heartbreak was at 16. First of many. Where emotions are concerned, I'm a slow learner. If I'd waited on that stuff? Lordy, I'd still be a basket case.

I think the two are intimately related. Relationships often lead to sex. And where do you draw the line? Are you saying no kissing before 25? What about a little heavy petting? Over the clothes? (god I'm kind of getting turned on just writing this...)

My first heartbreaks were actually even younger. 11? 12?

 

[Lunation]

My first (and only) heartbreak was 24? Maybe 23?

Eesh.

 

[lakesailer_mi]

My first (and only) heartbreak was 24.

Eesh.

It's not a contest dude...especially not heartbreak.

I think this sense that some "age" is "late" or "early" is a problem.

We get there when we get there...

 

[ViciousTease]

So, if waiting makes VT a "dork" does that make me a "dork lover?"

I waited too.

...for a tattooed business woman twice my age whose name I don't remember and who stayed up all night showing me how to eat pussy and find the g spot.

I retract my previous statement. My mistake was not marrying the first woman I slept with.

Somehow we seemed to have missed the important parts of this reply. Sounds like a story to me.

I think the two are intimately related. Relationships often lead to sex. And where do you draw the line? Are you saying no kissing before 25? What about a little heavy petting? Over the clothes? (god I'm kind of getting turned on just writing this...)

My first heartbreaks were actually even younger. 11? 12?

11 or 12? I had crushes at that age, but never even got close to having an actual boyfriend to pine over. I guess I was a late late bloomer.

My first (and only) heartbreak was 24? Maybe 23?

Eesh.

If you're not an expert on the subject of break ups, let's stick to what you know. Hmm, didn't you say someone stayed up all night teaching you something??? You should talk about that.

Blow jobs. I'm gonna convert Aussie one day.

And why on earth are we not discussing this?!?

.

 

[lakesailer_mi]

11 or 12? I had crushes at that age, but never even got close to having an actual boyfriend to pine over. I guess I was a late late bloomer.

*snort* VT...I crushed...hard. You can get your heart broken that way too...

My biggest, most serious heartbreak, was at 17, senior year.

 

[janeyl]

#85. Of which sexual topic do you feel you are most qualified at giving advice to others?

I wouldnt necessarily say I'd advise, that would suggest I consider myself an expert but I'm happy to share information and experience about several things...group sex, bisexuality, opening a relationship up to others, strap on play...the only thing I have a degree of more in depth knowledge is sexual health

 

[Lunation]

If you're not an expert on the subject of break ups, let's stick to what you know. Hmm, didn't you say someone stayed up all night teaching you something??? You should talk about that.

Oh, fine.



On the topic of pussy eating.

It's good to explore her. Tease her. Learn her folds with your tongue. But make no mistake, you're there to do more than tease. That's what a lot of people get wrong. That's not some dainty flower between her legs. It's a hungry cunt, and you're there to make it cum. So tease at first, by all means, but if those gentle licks are all you do, you stopped before the main course.

At some point you're going to need to suck her clit into your mouth. Fold your lips over your teeth so you don't hurt her. And suck. Again, don't be gentle. If you've ever sucked cock, it helps. Bob your head and fucking slurp. Use your tongue too, and be sure to get it under her hood so it's right on her clit. Two fingers inside of her (or however many fit comfortably). Crook them up, and make a "come hither" motion so you're rubbing the roof of her vagina as you fuck her with them. That hard, bumpy spot about an inch in is her g spot. Focus there. But there's a solid argument for just finger fucking her. Do what comes natural.

Move your head faster. Suck harder. You'll start getting light headed, your mouth occupied and nose buried in her musky arousal. That's ok. You can take a break for a few desperate gasps of air. Make sure you keep your tongue on her clit while you do, and make sure she can feel you panting into her cunt. Then get the fuck back to work and suck that clit like you're not allowed to breath until she cums.

And she will cum.

Bucking and grinding against you. Or maybe trying to get away? Stop finger fucking her and hold her hips so she can't escape while you keep sucking. She'll fight. She'll kick. But your mouth will calm her down eventually, and she'll roll into the next orgasm.

A good rule of thumb is that if she is still coherent enough to beg you to stop, she needs to cum again.

 

[SMNaughtywife]

^^^ sweet mother of god. *curls toes into the carpet*

 

[Endless_Night]

^^^^ Ummm. Yes, please.