Let's tickle the funny bones :)

[italianGod]

Question. What's the difference between a man and a parrot?

Answer. You can teach a parrot to talk nicely.

Question. Why is a man like a moped?

Answer. They're both fun to ride until your friends see you with one.

Question. What does a man call true love?

Answer. An erection.

 

[italianGod]

A man is driving up a steep, narrow mountain road. A woman is driving down the same road. As they pass each other, the woman leans out of the window and yells "PIG!!!"

The man immediately leans out of his window and replies, "BITCH!!!"

They each continue on their way, and..... as the man rounds the next corner, he crashes into a pig in the middle of the road..... and dies immediately.

If only men would listen.

 

[italianGod]

On a rural road a state trooper pulled this farmer over and said: "Sir, do you realize your wife fell out of the car several miles back?" To which the farmer replied: "Thank God, I thought I had gone deaf!"

 

[italianGod]

A little boy was in his room playing with himself, when his father walked in.

"Son! If you masturbate too much, you're gonna go blind!"

"Dad," the boy said, "I'm over here."

 

[italianGod]

Scientists have discovered a food that diminishes a woman's sex drive by 90 per cent - wedding cake!

 

[italianGod]

Question. What's the difference between boiling water and a woman?

Answer. You put a piece of meat in boiling water and it gets softer...

Question. Why do men find it hard to make eye contact with women?

Answer. Breasts don't have eyes!

Question. What do rocks and boobs have in common?

Answer. If they're flat, you can skip them.

 

[italianGod]

Two lesbians walk into a whorehouse and ask for the youngest girl they got. The madam looks at them for a second and says, "Sorry, we don't serve minors to lickers!"

 

[italianGod]

Question. What did the tampon say to the other tampon in school?

Answer. I'll see you next period.

Question. If mothers have Mother's Day and fathers have Father's Day, what do single guys have?

Answer. Palm Sunday!

Question. Why don't rabbits make noise when they're making love?

Answer. Because they have cotton balls!

 

[italianGod]

Smart man + smart woman = Romance
Smart man + dumb woman = One Night Stand
Dumb man + smart woman = Affair
Dumb man + dumb woman = Marriage

 

[italianGod]

Question. Why is Facebook a great site for loners?

Answer. Because it's the only place where they can talk to a wall and not be considered an loser!

Question. Whats the difference between Niagara and Viagra?

Answer. Niagara Falls.

Question. What did the lesbian vampire say to the other lesbian vampire?

Answer. I'll see you next month.

 

[italianGod]

Wow....it has added milk

http://hetu.in/img/fun/funh3905.jpg

 

[italianGod]

Thanks Message

http://hetu.in/img/fun/funh951.jpg

 

[italianGod]

Oh...MY....ssshhhh


http://hetu.in/img/fun/funh1004.jpg

 

[i_want_kitty]

http://27.media.tumblr.com/tumblr_lms3wzA93I1qzcqd5o1_250.jpg

 

[i_want_kitty]

http://29.media.tumblr.com/tumblr_lms3uwGPVV1qzcqd5o1_250.jpg

 

[italianGod]

http://27.media.tumblr.com/tumblr_lms3wzA93I1qzcqd5o1_250.jpg

LMAO....wow...I must say She kicks ass.....LOL

 

[italianGod]

Written on the T-Shirt of a girl:
STATUTORY WARNING: Objects inside the T-Shirt are larger than they appear from outside.

 

[italianGod]

A couple, who had been married for years, were making love.

He asked, "Dear, am I hurting you?"

"No," she replied. "But why do you ask?"

"You moved," he said.

 

[italianGod]

10 reasons to date a Hockey player:

1. They always wear protection

2. They have great hands

3. They are used to scoring

4. They have great stamina

5. They find the opening and get it in

6. They never miss the target

7. They know how to use their wood

8. They have long sticks

9.They know when to play rough

10. Because baseball players only know how to hit balls.

 

[italianGod]

Question. What do you call two cannibals having oral sex?

Answer. Trust.

 

[italianGod]

This is a bit geeky


What is ABCDEFG?

propose

A Boy Can Do Everything For a Girl!

But what is GFEDCBA? (The Opposite)

boyfriend

Girl Forgets Everything Done and Catches new Boy Again!

 

[italianGod]

An oxymoron is usually defined as a phrase in which two words of contradictory meaning are brought together:

Read till end

1) Clearly misunderstood

2) Exact Estimate

3) Small Crowd

4) Act Naturally

5) Found Missing

6) Fully Empty

7) Pretty ugly

8) Seriously funny

9) Only choice

10) Original copies

And the Mother of all......
.
.
.
.
.
.

11) Happily Married

 

[italianGod]

Eddie came to work Monday and his co-workers asked him how his weekend was. He said he played a little golf. So his co-worker asked him how well he did.

"I hit two of my best balls," he said.

"Tell me about it," said his co-worker.

"I stepped on a rake."

 

[italianGod]

A group of students had a biology lab. As a part of this lab they were supposed to scrape some bacteria off their teeth with a toothpick and then examine it under the microscope.

But this one girl had some problems identifying her bacteria and asked the professor what they were.

"Those are sperm cells."

 

[italianGod]

Man: Haven't I seen you someplace before?
Woman: Yes, that's why I don't go there anymore.

Man: Is this seat empty?
Woman: Yes, and this one will be if you sit down.

Man: Your place or mine?
Woman: Both. You go to yours, and I'll go to mine.

Man: So, what do you do for a living?
Woman: I'm a female impersonator.

Man: Hey baby, what's your sign?
Woman: Do not enter.

Man: How do you like your eggs in the morning?
Woman: Unfertilized.

Man: If I could see you naked, I'd die happy.
Woman: If I saw you naked, I'd probably die laughing.

Man: Your body is like a temple.
Woman: Sorry, there are no services today.

Man: I would go to the end of the world for you.
Woman: But would you stay there?