Moment of Weakness.

[Joe Wordsworth]

Originally posted by Lisa Denton
So your "manly" and smoke, drink and (OMG) wear leather coats, and those two major endearing qualities, negligent and dominating. Gee whiz, the only thing I like more than that is a guy who wants to tell me all about it. How did your ex let you slip away?

This is a joke thread that no ones caught on to yet, isn't it?

I'll be sure to be more careful when responding light-heartedly to jokes. I am sorry. I hadn't intended to prove any points, about my testosterone levels. I'm not a great boyfriend, I felt if I were to be honest about wanting a little advice, I should be honest about what I'm like.

addendum: I suppose I could clarify. I was brought up and sort of socially developed in such a way that emotive moments like "sentiment" are pretty unfamiliar. Perdita made mention of "whining guys"... personally, I am mildly disguted when guy whine about how great and excellent a boyfriend-catch they are and can't find anyone to take them. Its not a rational distaste, but neither is my dislike for lima beans--that is to say, its there and acknowledging that isn't a crime.

I was a little... uncomfortable... with "missing" my ex. Wondered how people deal with the feeling.

 

[Guest]

Gosh, this is not the first whinging guy thread I've seen recently. What's up with that? Hmmm, the other guy's only 20-something too.

Perdita

They'll grow up in another ten years or so.

 

[Guest]

Joe, you know I admire your intellect and reasoning, but perhaps they are not so apparent when trying to discuss the more personal? I was flippant in my use of 'whinge' (which is not so bad as 'whine' to me) and apologize. (I did think you'd take it better than the cute dogboy.)

Still, your more recent post explains more. This seems rather common for men, i,e., taking more than one try to explain what they really mean, esp. when it comes to the personal. That's just my experience.
(Even on serious writerly threads someone like Gauche usually ends up having to clarify his first post, haha.)

always wishing you the best,

Perdita

 

[Guest]

dbl post crap

 

[Lisa Denton]

I'll be sure to be more careful when responding light-heartedly to jokes. I am sorry. I hadn't intended to prove any points, about my testosterone levels. I'm not a great boyfriend, I felt if I were to be honest about wanting a little advice, I should be honest about what I'm like.

addendum: I suppose I could clarify. I was brought up and sort of socially developed in such a way that emotive moments like "sentiment" are pretty unfamiliar. Perdita made mention of "whining guys"... personally, I am mildly disguted when guy whine about how great and excellent a boyfriend-catch they are and can't find anyone to take them. Its not a rational distaste, but neither is my dislike for lima beans--that is to say, its there and acknowledging that isn't a crime.

I was a little... uncomfortable... with "missing" my ex. Wondered how people deal with the feeling.

I'm a'sorry, I was bad. I saw your first post and it seemed sincere except for the bragging about being negligent and dominating, well maybe that was honesty.
It was the following posts, perhaps in particular the one about how you drown your regrets in something foxy, blonde and not older enough to legally drink that led me to think it was a trolling for women's rights activists and/orjoke thread.
Maybe it was just defending your AV the posts about you being big and bad but it hit a nerve when coupled with the dominating remark.
I shouldn't have said what I did, or at least not the way I said it and I argh, cringe, spasm in pain "I apologize" ouch.
I usually don't say nothing too bad and I never try to hurt anyone's feelings and I hope you will accept my apology, it was sincere.

 

[Joe Wordsworth]

Originally posted by perdita
Joe, you know I admire your intellect and reasoning, but perhaps they are not so apparent when trying to discuss the more personal? I was flippant in my use of 'whinge' (which is not so bad as 'whine' to me) and apologize. (I did think you'd take it better than the cute dogboy.)

Still, your more recent post explains more. This seems rather common for men, i,e., taking more than one try to explain what they really mean, esp. when it comes to the personal. That's just my experience.
(Even on serious writerly threads someone like Gauche usually ends up having to clarify his first post, haha.)

always wishing you the best,

Perdita

I think you hit a nail on the head, 'Dita. I believe myself a rationally competant and intelligent man, but "personal stuff" is hard for me to understand. I find I'm too close to it to observe it properly. Re-explaining myself, getting closer and closer to accuracy, is a habit of mine--I've been working on it in the last years.

Originally posted by Lisa Denton
I'm a'sorry, I was bad. I saw your first post and it seemed sincere except for the bragging about being negligent and dominating, well maybe that was honesty.
It was the following posts, perhaps in particular the one about how you drown your regrets in something foxy, blonde and not older enough to legally drink that led me to think it was a trolling for women's rights activists and/orjoke thread.
Maybe it was just defending your AV the posts about you being big and bad but it hit a nerve when coupled with the dominating remark.
I shouldn't have said what I did, or at least not the way I said it and I argh, cringe, spasm in pain "I apologize" ouch.
I usually don't say nothing too bad and I never try to hurt anyone's feelings and I hope you will accept my apology, it was sincere.

I am loathe to promote myself... mostly because I detest promotion in others; but what I'm like is important to understanding where I am in relation to the problem. I could have better sugar-coated it, but I have no real illusions about myself. Its not pride, its objectivity. Trust me, I have been trying hard to cease negligence and domination in myself--but its not so easy as just commanding one's self to stop, sometimes.

I didn't take offense, don't worry about it. I was sincere in apologizing. I didn't mean to make my habits an honorific. I think people, sometimes, don't take me at face value enough. I'm a pretty straight shooter, I don't troll, but I can see how my manner brings about defensiveness. No harm done. I'm working on being less... confrontational?