lovecraft68
Bad Doggie
- Joined
- Jul 13, 2009
- Posts
- 47,285
The types of commenters we encounter here. Feel free to add to the list
1-The Gusher. Every story they read, every story is "So fucking hot, best story ever, favorite story on this site"...until the next one where they'll say the same thing.
2-The Hater-Opposite of #1. Every story sucks, every author sucks, life and everything else sucks. AKA as the onebomber
3-The cool story, bro. -This is the reader who leaves long comments that starts with "this reminds me of the time..." and goes into using your comment section as a platform to tell you all about their own adventures that most likely are as real as your story.
4-The Nitpicker.-This person will read a 20k story and find the tiniest detail to point out. No mention of the story being good, nothing positive discussed, the comment will be "You mentioned the car having this sized motor, but in reality that model only had that engine in 1966 but you said it was in 1968 which is factually incorrect.
5-The Kneejerk rant-This person only reads the beginning of a story and as soon as they spot something they don't like, stops reading and proceeds to rant and rave that this is more "stupid cuck shit and the typical cuck husband who let's his friend fuck his whore wife." all this will come from a story that opens with a couple and one of the husbands friends comes over. I used a LW type example, but this can happen with just about any type of baseless assumption.
6-Didn't even read the story-This is another type that has lots of things to say except that none of it pertains to your story. They will go on and on about things that never happened, or not the way you portrayed but that doesn't stop them. This type is closely related to the knee jerk but at least the KJ is ripping something they saw in the story, these people are in another world.
7-The "check this guy out". This is the one that irks me the most. "If you like this check out this story by so and so. Sometimes its just that, other times they'll add "If you want to see this done by a better writer". They use your work to promote their fav author, or could be an alt pushing their own work.
8-The smoke blower-or so we hope. This person is a spin off of cool story bro. Difference is CSB will tell you how they seduced their teacher, had a foursome, screwed their best friend's mom etc...this guy tells stories we do not want to think could be true. They generally haunt the I/T and Non con sections telling you all about how they got their little sister pregnant or 'really put this snotty woman" in her place. You don't know whether to roll your eyes or contact the local police.
8-The moralist/why are they here-this one we all know and there are many versions, the biggest one here is the type to squeal over cheating, but you'll find them in GM, Lesbian, Trans, because it violates their religious views. They'll hit Taboo, NC, MC and just about everything else...but yet they're in those categories.
9-Selective moralist-this person differs from the straight up moralist because they are picky about what they see is wrong. In a brother sister story where the siblings get high. The comment is "You should never promote drug use!" so...siblings fucking is acceptable. toking up is not. My personal fav is "Why do your mothers always talk dirty, they shouldn't act like that." Right, blowing your son is fine, but talking about it during the act is not. Got it.
10-The real man. As people here know, this is my all-time favorite. There are the obvious ones in LW again over cheating, but you spot them everywhere. They're easy to spot because every male character who doesn't "take" the woman and be in complete charge or show any hesitation before the sex-no matter the scenario-or has some consideration for their partner is a simp/cuck limp wristed 'faggot' that last word is the true tell of the manliest of men. Be grateful we share the site with them.
11-The I didn't get it. Yes, sometimes we don't always get the point across as well as we wanted, or there could be something we left vague hoping readers pick up on it, so there are legit versions of this. But this one never gets anything. They complain the simplest most well defined acts or thoughts are confusing to them. Man asks out his long time crush, she says yes, they have a lot of fun, the end." "Not sure what you were going for here but..."
12-Really, that's it?- This type isn't necessarily bad, just frustrating. You wrote an 8 page story, worked your ass off on it, proud of it. This person comments. "Hot" "Good job" "Liked it" or "Hated this" and that's it. Took the time to comment and that's all you got?" Anyone else here remember Caddyshack? "Thanks for nothing, Danny!"
13-The personal troll. This one doesn't just rag on the story but you. "This author is trash, everything you write is...don't read anymore of their stories, they all suck. 'LC took another shit and here it is!"
BTW that's an actual comment I received some time ago and still laugh at it.
14-The forum fiver-Yes, I'm going there. This person will comment on every story from one of their friends here and sound more effusive than type #1. Its fine to support your friends, but no, not every story they have written is the greatest thing since the last one, and they're always accompanied by a free five
15-The forum troll-Now whereas #14 always uses their name and is overly and biasedly positive, this sneak never uses their name, they post anon-or use an alt-and bash anything an author they disagree with here publishes. Some of them aren't the smartest though as they'll slip up in the comment and say something you saw said here.
1-The Gusher. Every story they read, every story is "So fucking hot, best story ever, favorite story on this site"...until the next one where they'll say the same thing.
2-The Hater-Opposite of #1. Every story sucks, every author sucks, life and everything else sucks. AKA as the onebomber
3-The cool story, bro. -This is the reader who leaves long comments that starts with "this reminds me of the time..." and goes into using your comment section as a platform to tell you all about their own adventures that most likely are as real as your story.
4-The Nitpicker.-This person will read a 20k story and find the tiniest detail to point out. No mention of the story being good, nothing positive discussed, the comment will be "You mentioned the car having this sized motor, but in reality that model only had that engine in 1966 but you said it was in 1968 which is factually incorrect.
5-The Kneejerk rant-This person only reads the beginning of a story and as soon as they spot something they don't like, stops reading and proceeds to rant and rave that this is more "stupid cuck shit and the typical cuck husband who let's his friend fuck his whore wife." all this will come from a story that opens with a couple and one of the husbands friends comes over. I used a LW type example, but this can happen with just about any type of baseless assumption.
6-Didn't even read the story-This is another type that has lots of things to say except that none of it pertains to your story. They will go on and on about things that never happened, or not the way you portrayed but that doesn't stop them. This type is closely related to the knee jerk but at least the KJ is ripping something they saw in the story, these people are in another world.
7-The "check this guy out". This is the one that irks me the most. "If you like this check out this story by so and so. Sometimes its just that, other times they'll add "If you want to see this done by a better writer". They use your work to promote their fav author, or could be an alt pushing their own work.
8-The smoke blower-or so we hope. This person is a spin off of cool story bro. Difference is CSB will tell you how they seduced their teacher, had a foursome, screwed their best friend's mom etc...this guy tells stories we do not want to think could be true. They generally haunt the I/T and Non con sections telling you all about how they got their little sister pregnant or 'really put this snotty woman" in her place. You don't know whether to roll your eyes or contact the local police.
8-The moralist/why are they here-this one we all know and there are many versions, the biggest one here is the type to squeal over cheating, but you'll find them in GM, Lesbian, Trans, because it violates their religious views. They'll hit Taboo, NC, MC and just about everything else...but yet they're in those categories.
9-Selective moralist-this person differs from the straight up moralist because they are picky about what they see is wrong. In a brother sister story where the siblings get high. The comment is "You should never promote drug use!" so...siblings fucking is acceptable. toking up is not. My personal fav is "Why do your mothers always talk dirty, they shouldn't act like that." Right, blowing your son is fine, but talking about it during the act is not. Got it.
10-The real man. As people here know, this is my all-time favorite. There are the obvious ones in LW again over cheating, but you spot them everywhere. They're easy to spot because every male character who doesn't "take" the woman and be in complete charge or show any hesitation before the sex-no matter the scenario-or has some consideration for their partner is a simp/cuck limp wristed 'faggot' that last word is the true tell of the manliest of men. Be grateful we share the site with them.
11-The I didn't get it. Yes, sometimes we don't always get the point across as well as we wanted, or there could be something we left vague hoping readers pick up on it, so there are legit versions of this. But this one never gets anything. They complain the simplest most well defined acts or thoughts are confusing to them. Man asks out his long time crush, she says yes, they have a lot of fun, the end." "Not sure what you were going for here but..."
12-Really, that's it?- This type isn't necessarily bad, just frustrating. You wrote an 8 page story, worked your ass off on it, proud of it. This person comments. "Hot" "Good job" "Liked it" or "Hated this" and that's it. Took the time to comment and that's all you got?" Anyone else here remember Caddyshack? "Thanks for nothing, Danny!"
13-The personal troll. This one doesn't just rag on the story but you. "This author is trash, everything you write is...don't read anymore of their stories, they all suck. 'LC took another shit and here it is!"
BTW that's an actual comment I received some time ago and still laugh at it.14-The forum fiver-Yes, I'm going there. This person will comment on every story from one of their friends here and sound more effusive than type #1. Its fine to support your friends, but no, not every story they have written is the greatest thing since the last one, and they're always accompanied by a free five
15-The forum troll-Now whereas #14 always uses their name and is overly and biasedly positive, this sneak never uses their name, they post anon-or use an alt-and bash anything an author they disagree with here publishes. Some of them aren't the smartest though as they'll slip up in the comment and say something you saw said here.
