Pet peeves

[monique1971]

Awww.

We can bring it back! If we peeve, they will come.

 

[Ekserb]

Awww.

We can bring it back! If we peeve, they will come.

Before my previous post I sat here for ten minutes trying to think of an appropriate rant, but all I could think of was repeat episodes of stuff I've gone off about before. Am I out of peeves?

 

[Ekserb]

I shall study on this as I sleep, and tomorrow awake with a renewed sense of what makes the world stop spinning.

And then I'll post about it.

 

[monique1971]

I shall study on this as I sleep, and tomorrow awake with a renewed sense of what makes the world stop spinning.

And then I'll post about it.

I look forward to it. I know you can't possibly be out of peeves. I might run out of peeves, but you? Never.

 

[Ekserb]

Enough with the tattoos! I'm tired of them, both personally and professionally.

They used to be a novelty, now they're fucking everywhere. And parents are letting their teenagers get them! Why? Because they have a couple of their own and they don't yet see why this is a self-centered, stupid fad.

And unless you jabbed the needle into your own skin, it is not your way of expressing yourself. It's a tattoo artist's way of expressing himself, and you just happened to get in the way of his needle. ("But I chose the design and location myself!" Oh, well that's different! I wonder who pointed to the bare ceiling in the Sistine Chapel and told Michelangelo to start painting?)

There are no more un-inked porn stars. Every fucking one of them has some version of a tramp stamp right above their ass crack. If I see one new porn vid without a tattoo, I'll die of shock. I'm starting to really love the "vintage" (circa 1990s) porn.

Want to be different? Want to be unique? Don't get a fucking tattoo! You'll be the only person on your block with clean, smooth skin. And I guaran-fucking-tee you will be loved and adored, even without some stupid blue-black marks all over your body.

It's also getting harder for me to find models who have clear skin. When I see a tattoo on a model, I equate that to coming to a photo shoot with bruises or scars that will never fade or wash off. Except you chose to put them there! What the fuck?!?

 

[monique1971]

Enough with the tattoos! I'm tired of them, both personally and professionally.

They used to be a novelty, now they're fucking everywhere. And parents are letting their teenagers get them! Why? Because they have a couple of their own and they don't yet see why this is a self-centered, stupid fad.

And unless you jabbed the needle into your own skin, it is not your way of expressing yourself. It's a tattoo artist's way of expressing himself, and you just happened to get in the way of his needle. ("But I chose the design and location myself!" Oh, well that's different! I wonder who pointed to the bare ceiling in the Sistine Chapel and told Michelangelo to start painting?)

There are no more un-inked porn stars. Every fucking one of them has some version of a tramp stamp right above their ass crack. If I see one new porn vid without a tattoo, I'll die of shock. I'm starting to really love the "vintage" (circa 1990s) porn.

Want to be different? Want to be unique? Don't get a fucking tattoo! You'll be the only person on your block with clean, smooth skin. And I guaran-fucking-tee you will be loved and adored, even without some stupid blue-black marks all over your body.

It's also getting harder for me to find models who have clear skin. When I see a tattoo on a model, I equate that to coming to a photo shoot with bruises or scars that will never fade or wash off. Except you chose to put them there! What the fuck?!?

Rock on!

Incidentally, I've seriously been considering getting one.

 

[Macdaddy23]

I agree with Ekserb on tattoo's

 

[sugaredwalls]

Somewhat new to Lit and this thread is really long. Sorry if this rant has been done....

People who write stupid shit on their Facebook page:

Sitting at my kitchen table contemplating the upcoming summer while savoring a bowl of fresh strawberries and ice cream.

They should of just written I'm a huge douche bag and it would of had the same meaning.

 

[sugaredwalls]

Pet Peeve Trilogy

People who still write checks at the grocery store. Get a debit card like the rest of the modern world, you loser. What the hell? Why are you still writing checks? Save a tree, get some fucking plastic. I hate you more if your checks have puppies or kittens on them.

(unique to Oregon and other states like it) Not being able to pump my own gas. Yes, I get to stay in the car all warm and dry or not get hot while some poor schmuck making minimum wage pumps my gas but...I have to carve out a fucking half an hour of my time in the morning to just get gas. Yo, dude! Pump the gas, give me my receipt so I can be on my way. Don't go talk to your buddy about weekend plans, don't even think about helping someone else before finishing with me, just pump my gas so I can be the fuck on my way. Nothing infuriates me more than some dumb ass putting the pump in my tank and then walking away for an eternity.

People who not only talk too loud on their cell but also talk about disgusting things. No, I don't want to hear about the cyst you had removed from the inside of your nose. That's so gross, why would you even admit to that in public or at all?

A peeve within a peeve: People at Blockbuster who read the DVD titles and movie description to someone they are talking to on their cell. Not only do they look like a tool and annoy the shit out of me but have they .....ever heard of something called.... Netflix????

I wonder if anyone has done any studies comparing the rising usage of cell phones against the complete and utter disintegration and downward spiral of acceptable behavior in public. In other words, have cell phones turned people in to bigger assholes? I think that would be a resounding yes!

 

[monique1971]

People who think it's hilarious when their kids spill stuff all over the other party guests.

I saw it happen on Sunday.

 

[Macdaddy23]

barking dogs

 

[sugaredwalls]

People who think it's hilarious when their kids spill stuff all over the other party guests.

I saw it happen on Sunday.

No kidding, yeah, that's real hilarious huh?

 

[sugaredwalls]

Whoever dredged this thread back up has awoken my cynical side!

Viagra/Cialis commercials: Holy limp dick on a cracker! Between the frequency they show them and at the times they show them, we can all be rest assured that even a fucking 4 year old knows what erectile dysfunction is.

Sarah Palin: There are lots of smart, beautiful women but Sarah honey, you aint one of them. Sure you got a great rack, got that sexy Tina Fey thing going...and oh, you're a cool mom because you let 16 year old Bristol fuck Levi in the house but...

Watching you try to string a coherent sentence together about our economy and socialism is painful. It's clear you are clueless about both and every time you open your mouth, we all lose I.Q. points.

 

[Ekserb]

I've ranted about this before, but I think it bears repeating. Maybe it will sink in after the thousandth time....

What is it with people (mostly men) gushing about the pictures people post in their threads? These pathetic losers go on and on about how they've "never seen anything so beautiful" when talking about a crappy cellphone photo with the subject's head cut off and the dirty laundry in the background. For fuck's sake, get a life! And while you're at it, learn to fucking spell.

Even worse are the ones who try to give what they think is serious artistic critique by commenting on the "high quality" of the photos but only show how ridiculous they are in their overzealous, cock-stroking, Cheetos-and-Diet Coke-induced, living-in-their-parent's-basement internet lust.

These are acceptable responses:

• "Nice!"

• "Beautiful!"

• "These are great!"

These are unacceptable:

• "Dearest and delicable [deleted to protect the innocent],
I am left speechless at the latest set of photographs. I have said it before so please forgive my redundency but you have the most remarkable and natural ability to ALWAYSappear on camera so beautifully. I can only imagine how lovely you would photograph in the hands of a professional photographer. The results would be artful and priceless."

• "Have you just erased our memories with that bright light? Turned us into your minions........ cuilt members willing to fulfill all your desires.
Now... were we supposed to stay away from the light... or go toward it? If that's heaven... then I'm all in!!"

• "I think if i was granted 3 wishes by a Genie, 1 would ABSOLUTELY be to spend a day and night with you!" [Ekserb: Seriously? Jesus fucking Christ.]

 

[monique1971]

I've ranted about this before, but I think it bears repeating. Maybe it will sink in after the thousandth time....

What is it with people (mostly men) gushing about the pictures people post in their threads? These pathetic losers go on and on about how they've "never seen anything so beautiful" when talking about a crappy cellphone photo with the subject's head cut off and the dirty laundry in the background. For fuck's sake, get a life! And while you're at it, learn to fucking spell.

Even worse are the ones who try to give what they think is serious artistic critique by commenting on the "high quality" of the photos but only show how ridiculous they are in their overzealous, cock-stroking, Cheetos-and-Diet Coke-induced, living-in-their-parent's-basement internet lust.

These are acceptable responses:

• "Nice!"

• "Beautiful!"

• "These are great!"

These are unacceptable:

• "Dearest and delicable [deleted to protect the innocent],
I am left speechless at the latest set of photographs. I have said it before so please forgive my redundency but you have the most remarkable and natural ability to ALWAYSappear on camera so beautifully. I can only imagine how lovely you would photograph in the hands of a professional photographer. The results would be artful and priceless."

• "Have you just erased our memories with that bright light? Turned us into your minions........ cuilt members willing to fulfill all your desires.
Now... were we supposed to stay away from the light... or go toward it? If that's heaven... then I'm all in!!"

• "I think if i was granted 3 wishes by a Genie, 1 would ABSOLUTELY be to spend a day and night with you!" [Ekserb: Seriously? Jesus fucking Christ.]

Are these actual examples? If not, you have a remarkable ability to mimic a certain type of Lit rhetoric. In fact, maybe you just have a bunch of alts that you use to post the kind of posts that you claim to despise, but secretly can't resist making. Heh.

 

[sugaredwalls]

People who pretend to not know where the end of the line is.

Yes, we all love waiting in line and because you're so special and more important, a spot has miraculously opened up just for you while the rest of us peons wait.

In your fucking dreams asshole! Get to the back of the line where you belong.

Bigger peeve: when clerks/customer service people help line cutters, completely disregarding they were not next. Fuckers!

 

[Ekserb]

People who pretend to not know where the end of the line is.

Yes, we all love waiting in line and because you're so special and more important, a spot has miraculously opened up just for you while the rest of us peons wait.

In your fucking dreams asshole! Get to the back of the line where you belong.

Bigger peeve: when clerks/customer service people help line cutters, completely disregarding they were not next. Fuckers!

I may have covered this a couple of years ago (yes, I have been peeving for that long), but I'll add to it:

I go to the deli and take a number. The sign says you need to be present when they call your number or you will be skipped. Wouldn't you know it, every single fucking time I'm at the store someone decides to grab a number and then run around picking up other things while the rest of us wait patiently.

Asshole's number is called ... twice ... thrice ... then we move on to the next customer. After a couple of minutes Mr. Prick shows up and wants to be helped. Nay, expects to be helped! The deli personnel are too nice to say no or maybe they're worried about upsetting a customer. Either way, they usually submit to the idiot's will.

FUCK THAT! "Hey, do you see the sign that says you are supposed to be here when they call your number? You weren't here. Now take a new number and watch your freshly grabbed ice cream melt while you wait for the rest of us to order a sample of everything behind the counter."

And yes, I have gone off on these assholes, much to the laughter and applause of my fellow shoppers.

 

[Ekserb]

Are these actual examples? If not, you have a remarkable ability to mimic a certain type of Lit rhetoric. In fact, maybe you just have a bunch of alts that you use to post the kind of posts that you claim to despise, but secretly can't resist making. Heh.

Pick your favorite response:

1. Of course they're actual quotes. Jesus, sweetheart, you don't think I could make this shit up, do you?

or

2. Eventually you will realize that I am every other member on this site. There is only you and me and my alts.

 

[sugaredwalls]

I may have covered this a couple of years ago (yes, I have been peeving for that long)
.

Peeving is an art form, it can't be rushed. Like Rome, it wasn't built in a day. And who knows, hundreds of years from now archeologists and anthropologists could discover this forum and wonder "what the fuck is a pet peeve?" They could name it the "Ekserb Peeve Era" and use it as a time frame reference of when decent human behavior hit the skids in the 21st century. They'll appreciate the time and effort you put in creating this thread.

Of course if they really did discover this forum, they probably would be too busy commenting on the artistic lighting in a picture thread of a girl with a big rack.

 

[Guest]

my pet peeve at this time is receiving PM's about my pic thread when it's just as easy to post the comment in the thread

 

[lonelyjulia]

Having to keep my sexual appetites suppressed in certain public places to keep my job.

 

[gothic_nymph]

assholes that judge before asking for facts!!!!!!

 

[sugaredwalls]

Doctors who make you wait forever.

yes, I understand you are busy and have a large patient load but do you think you could find a way to not make your patients wait a fucking eternity to see you?

The other day at the ophthalmologist office, I arrive promptly for my scheduled appointment. The nice nurse/technician takes me back to the exam room right at my appointment time and takes pertinent information and says "the doctor will be with you in a few moments". Great, how refreshing, to get in and out of a doctors office in a reasonable amount of time. I'm optimistic, so, I don't bother getting out my iphone while I wait. I grab a year old issue of People magazine to peruse, thinking it won't be long.....

10 minutes later....still hopeful the doctor will see me any minute now.

15 minutes later....I'm starting to get a little annoyed. Why do they bother giving you an appointment time? I showed up on time, is it so unreasonable that I would expect my appointment to occur on time or at least within 15 minutes? Is my time not valuable too? Bored with the year old magazines, I get out my phone to read and answer email.

25 minutes later....WHAT THE FUCk?!? Did they forget about me? Should I go out there and ask? Jesus Christ, I've been in this room forever, it's now almost a half an hour past my scheduled appointment. Screw this, I'm outta here......

35 God damn minutes after my scheduled appointment, Dr. Fucknut finally makes an appearance:

Dr. Fucknut: Hello, I'm Dr. Fucknut, how are you doing today?

Me: Better now, I've been waiting over a half an hour. I hope we have time to go over the reason I wanted to see you and my concerns.

Dr. Fucknut: (completely disregarding my comment about his tardiness) Hey, is that an iphone? Those are pretty cool devices.

Me: Oh, do you have one?

Dr. Fucknut: No, I just like them because they give my patients something to do when I'm running behind in my appointments.



We're going to need a proctologist in exam room 4 STAT! There's a doctor with a year old issue of People Magazine lodged in his colon.

 

[trysail]

Bumper sticker of the day:

Honk if I'm paying your mortgage.​

 

[perfor8ted]

When you finish the TP role change it out.!!!!!!!!!!