~Post baseless lies about the person above you - V.6~

[deft]

He’s better at the trumpet. He likes to blow

She loves watching me blow.

 

[MiaBabe23]

She loves watching me blow.

Takes an inconvenient amount of time blowing cool air over his coffee because he’s afraid of a burnt lip

 

[deft]

Takes an inconvenient amount of time blowing cool air over his coffee because he’s afraid of a burnt lip

Is the world’s greatest dancer.

 

[SimonSex]

Can’t dance a lick, mostly due to the red clown shoes he prefers to wear.

 

[Jaws82]

Auditioned to be a member of Riverdance

 

[MiaBabe23]

Auditioned to be a member of Riverdance

Went to watch Riverdance but missed it because he assumed it took place at the nearest river
Nobody’s sure whether to warn him about tickets he’s booked to see Merchant of Venice

 

[smtst5]

Went to watch Riverdance but missed it because he assumed it took place at the nearest river
Nobody’s sure whether to warn him about tickets he’s booked to see Merchant of Venice

Taught the Australian Olympic break dancer everything that she knows

 

[cactusjack0584]

Holds the world record for most times one person has been attacked by an armadillo. And it was three times, and three different armadillos.

 

[SimonSex]

Has an emotional support peacock.

 

[MedicalMuse]

Has an emotional support peacock.

Has an emotional support cock.

 

[SimonSex]

Has an emotional support cock.

Well, that’s an actual truth. It brings me great joy!

Has days when she wears only jodhpurs in the house. Nothing else.

 

[MedicalMuse]

Drives a smart car

 

[MiaBabe23]

Drives a smart car

Designed the smart car that he drives, including an optional feature where it does the opposite of whatever he tells it to do

 

[smtst5]

Designed the smart car that he drives, including an optional feature where it does the opposite of whatever he tells it to do

Was the inspiration of the feature that does the opposite of what it supposed to do

 

[MedicalMuse]

Secretly wants to join the cirque du soliel

 

[deft]

Secretly wants to join the cirque du soliel

Is Banksy.

 

[smtst5]

Secretly wants to join the cirque du soliel

Has finally returned home after being one of Taylor Swifts backup dancers

 

[MiaBabe23]

Is Banksy.

Has finally returned home after being one of Taylor Swifts backup dancers

Were both backup dancers for Taylor Swift until being ejected for a very vocal disagreement mid-performance about who had the nicest butt

 

[smtst5]

Were both backup dancers for Taylor Swift until being ejected for a very vocal disagreement mid-performance about who had the nicest butt

That was only part of the reason. Both of you did the opposite moves as the rest of the dancers.

 

[HollyS]

That was only part of the reason. Both of you did the opposite moves as the rest of the dancers.

Sometimes can't wait for the tequila to be made, so drinks the agave juice raw.

 

[smtst5]

Sometimes can't wait for the tequila to be made, so drinks the agave juice raw.

I thought this was supposed to be lies?

Working lots of overtime at the sperm bank since her coworkers were busy dancing for Taylor Swift.

 

[BrendaBear]

I thought this was supposed to be lies?

Working lots of overtime at the sperm bank since her coworkers were busy dancing for Taylor Swift.

Dated Taylor Swift and was the inspiration for several of her biggest hits.

 

[smtst5]

Dated Taylor Swift and was the inspiration for several of her biggest hits.

Another one of Taylor Swift’s backup dancers spilling the tea

 

[HollyS]

Another one of Taylor Swift’s backup dancers spilling the tea

Thought he could make a withdrawal at the sperm bank where I work.

 

[jbeardo1]

Holly got into the sperm banking business after a failed attempt at starting a vaginal WiFi cafe which sadly failed from the combination of: technology wasnt mature enough, and the involuntary sperm donations that kept being made on the glass window of the cafe when she was open for business