~Post baseless lies about the person above you - V.6~

[AlwaysDancing]

Ahhh the ole bait and switch

Stays up at night trying to figure out if he is for or against muff switching.

 

[kellyt1994]

Sells propane and propane accessories.

 

[Jodaily]

Was a backup singer for Jlo

 

[kellyt1994]

Pays me good money to stand around in my underwear and say, "Hey y'all, I'm from Texas". It's a little weird but it puts beer in the fridge.

 

[Jodaily]

Loves to hum the Yellow Rose of Texas while practicing her fluffing.

 

[EctoJohn]

Doesn't spend much time here.

 

[Jodaily]

Has the Lit app on his phone so he won’t be away from it ever.

 

[fakingadulthood]

Tongue is poking out of his lips a bit so it’s not completely in cheek

 

[kellyt1994]

Tongue is poking out of his lips a bit so it’s not completely in cheek

In fairness, he doesn't say whose cheek.

 

[fakingadulthood]

Claims to have been forsaken but it was really a mutual split

 

[EctoJohn]

Knows where Santa Claus really lives and only will tell me it's not actually the North Pole.

 

[kellyt1994]

Knows where Santa Claus really lives and only will tell me it's not actually the North Pole.

@EctoJohn fully understands that my price of 60,000 bacon-wrapped shrimp with elotes on the side is not up for negotiation.

 

[EctoJohn]

Once made out with Ron Swanson.

 

[kellyt1994]

Once made out with Ron Swanson.

I'll throw in a tape of it when I get my shrimp. But Mr. Swanson only had VHS equipment

 

[Jodaily]

Has dozens and dozens of vhs tapes of a rather personal nature. Open to the highest bidder. Shrimpers need not apply.

 

[EctoJohn]

Has taken a judo class and somehow completed it learning how to salsa dance.

 

[Jodaily]

Was detained for showing off his romantic sword. Charges were dropped for the small evidence.

 

[kellyt1994]

Has taken a judo class and somehow completed it learning how to salsa dance.

Once took a yoga class and wasn't seen for three years.


"https://streamable.com/e/w578u"

 

[lilmissdarling]

She tried to fight a mime at a carnival because he looked "smug."

 

[EctoJohn]

She is an expert in gnome creed.

 

[kellyt1994]

She tried to fight a mime at a carnival because he looked "smug."

Is head of a shadow guild of smug mime operatives. No one knows their true objectives but I suspect they're after Santa's true location.

 

[kellyt1994]

She is an expert in gnome creed.

The gnomes are almost certainly in cahoots with the mimes and could be the root source of the unbearable smugness. I've got my eye on both of you.

 

[EctoJohn]

Runs a cartel for smuggled KitKats with flavors that we don't get in the United States.

 

[kellyt1994]

Runs a cartel for smuggled KitKats with flavors that we don't get in the United States.

If we can make the Santa for shrimp deal happen I'll throw in a case of Zooey Deschanel toenail clipping infused KitKats. But that's my final offer. Santa's secret location, a VHS tape of me and Ron Swanson, and a case of ZD toenail candy. I think that's more than fair.

 

[AlwaysDancing]

If we can make the Santa for shrimp deal happen I'll throw in a case of Zooey Deschanel toenail clipping infused KitKats. But that's my final offer. Santa's secret location, a VHS tape of me and Ron Swanson, and a case of ZD toenail candy. I think that's more than fair.

Makes people spit-take their coffee because it’s erotic and soon there will be an online porn demand for it.