Puns

[SirConradPeckereye]

 

[SirConradPeckereye]

Oh no it's a remote pussy

 

[SirConradPeckereye]

 

[SirConradPeckereye]

 

[SirConradPeckereye]

 

[Condor4]

My name is chervase i used to be the matreadee at a fancy fish restaurant where you could choose your fish from the giant tank in the middle of the restaurant.
In the tank was a large squid that had been never chosen from day one and to be honest it was off colour like a sicly green and was a bit hairy, so nobody ever picked it
One day a guy came and demanded I took it to the chef, I refused and was sacked. The manager told Hans the German kitchen cleaner to get it out of the tank and take it to the chef and he refused also which goes to prove that
Hans that do dishes is as soft as chervase when it comes to a lime green hairy lip squid.

 

[FranklyFrank]

 

[Whitneysub]

For all you dirty dogs...you know who you are have a super fantastic weekend and give a smile to everyone you meet, even the jerks, lol

 

[SirConradPeckereye]

One lung said to another…we be-lung together!

 

[SirConradPeckereye]

What's the difference between a hippo and a zippo? One is really heavy and the other is a little lighter!

 

[SirConradPeckereye]

My girlfriend thought I'd never be able to make a car out of spaghetti… You should've seen her face when I drove pasta!

 

[SirConradPeckereye]

I just found out that I'm color blind. The news came completely out of the green!

 

[SirConradPeckereye]

What do you call the wife of a hippie? A Mississippi!

 

[SirConradPeckereye]

Whenever I undress in the bathroom… My shower gets turned on!

 

[SirConradPeckereye]

I'm no cheetah…you're lion!

 

[SirConradPeckereye]

What do you call an overweight psychic? A four-chin teller!

 

[SirConradPeckereye]

What’s the difference between deer nuts and beer nuts? Beer nuts are two dollars, but deer nuts are under a buck.

 

[SirConradPeckereye]

My girlfriend said, “You act like a detective too much. I want to split up.” “Good idea,” I replied. “We can cover more ground that way.”

 

[SirConradPeckereye]

 

[HoneyMeadows]

People in Athens rarely get up before sunrise. Dawn is tough on Greece.

Dish soap?

 

[investor2020]

 

[investor2020]

 

[investor2020]

 

[SirConradPeckereye]

It goes downtown, and goes back up again.

Ah that song...

 

[SirConradPeckereye]