Signs your mate is cheating...

[sheath]

These are good Sheath, I had to laugh on the Irish Spring one.
In my case, the bastard actually had the balls to bring her home to my bed! Allow me to say it wasn't "pretty" when I walked in on them
Ah well........that's been almost 20 years ago and lots of water under the proverbial bridge.


-kym- Tossing all of those worries over the bridge

I just have to ask...what did you DO when you walked in on them?

S.

 

[James G 5]

Re: Re: Re: Re: Re: Signs your mate is cheating...

Well, in that case...as long as he rogers me thoroughly enough that I pass out in his arms, and wakes me up in the same way, then he could spend all the time he wanted on the internet.

See? I'm easy at compromise.

S.

Hmmm
Any other ways in which you're "easy"?

 

[sheath]

Re: Re: Re: Re: Re: Re: Signs your mate is cheating...

Hmmm
Any other ways in which you're "easy"?

Ahem. Well, I'm here. Flirting shamelessly.

What do you think?

S.

 

[James G 5]

I'd just like to point out that if everyone gave up on this silly idea of monogamy and worked on loving their partners and building relationships with them that weren't focused on stifling their sexual urges, there'd be no "cheating" anymore, since cheating involves lying, skulking, deception, etc

If the mates were free to go off occasionaly & satusfy their urges in the context of a strong & loving relationship, everyone would win


*running away & waiting for the inevitable storm of monogamy-defending flames*

 

[sheath]

I'd just like to point out that if everyone gave up on this silly idea of monogamy and worked on loving their partners and building relationships with them that weren't focused on stifling their sexual urges, there'd be no "cheating" anymore, since cheating involves lying, skulking, deception, etc

If the mates were free to go off occasionaly & satusfy their urges in the context of a strong & loving relationship, everyone would win


*running away & waiting for the inevitable storm of monogamy-defending flames*

LOL You LOVE to stir up those firestorms, dontcha?

Silly, silly James. You invite controversy.

I like you.

S.

 

[James G 5]

LOL You LOVE to stir up those firestorms, dontcha?

Silly, silly James. You invite controversy.

I like you.

S.

Been thinking about starting threads on this
gotten in conversations with 2 sub ladies lately who've been in a STRING of failed one-on-ones but are disgusted & horrified by Pouty & I being poly, insisting it must all be about me wanting to have power-over the people I am with or be all about satisfying my sexual needs
The level of vehemence is disturbing

And besides, I rarely get sex, I need SOMEthing to do with all this excess energy

On the bright side I get to see Pouty tomorrow

 

[nightswan]

So, now I'm wondering...are you agreeing with Cobra77 in a sense, that if someone gets jealous, they are asking for it?

I wasn't sayng that at all,just that, sometimes,excessive jealousy is a bad thing.


And I'm even more curious...you have pointed out 'normal' people in two posts now. What exactly is your definition of normal?

Some has pointed out that some people seems to be more inclined to cheating.;i was sayng that isn't true.

And please clarify something else for me. I think I understand, but I want to be sure I have this right. Because it is very difficult to find if some people are cheating, then there is no point in investigating? Even if you KNOW deep down (that gut feeling, remember?)
that someone is lying, or omitting important information that affects your relationship?

Absolutely not.There's point in investigating,even tough it's a painful journey,since it's about the respect you deserve to have from your partner.

That it is good to hope for the best, but to never expect it? What happens when you DO find proof? Are you saying that because you investigated and found the proof, you deserved to be cheated upon, and the fact that you investigated just proves it? That you deserve what you get, because you aren't "secure" in yourself and willing to overlook whatever someone else may say for the sake of window dressing?

I wasn't sayng that at all.My point is , in fact,you can hope that the other person will not cheat you,but never be sure,NOT that you deserve what you get since you're insecure: everyone deserve love and respect,like i've always done in my relationships.If i found out of being cheated upon,the only thing that i can is to leave that person,since i have no power over him/her,that's all.
I hope to have cleared some thoughts..

Please express your thoughts about it,i need your feedback on this.

 

[nightswan]

Your post seemed very clear to me, you essentially said that it is okay for people to be dishonest within relationships as long as the other person doesn't know. Expecting to be able to trust what a person says or vows you equated to jealousy or them not feeling secure in themselves. Lies are merely shields for privacy and are acceptable. That you should not expect that your partner will be loyal or keep his word and if you do that is considered trying to own them.
That lies are only found out by investigation which a trusting secure person should not do.

Have I missed anything? Oh yes, the bit about having multiple partners, which seems to have nothing at all to do with cheating. That was a bit unclear but as it had nothing to do with the subject it didn't really matter.

and in this post you are agreeing with another post that basically says if you feel someone is being jealous you are justified in breaking your word, that someone else's actions free you from any responsibility to maintain the integrity of your own words.

In general, that people should have no inner moral compass of honesty and responsibility, that their integrity should be a mere convenience when they wish it to and disposable when it is easier to do without it.

Please read my posts again,i 'm afraid that you've completely misunderstood me.At least,sheath has tried to clear some things out;if you read carefully,i was sayng the opposite of what you've stated about me here.

 

[James G 5]

So, now I'm wondering...are you agreeing with Cobra77 in a sense, that if someone gets jealous, they are asking for it?

<snip>

Please express your thoughts about it,i need your feedback on this.

Nightswan, the way this was edited made it VERY difficult to tel your thoughts from Sheath's.....maybe you could edit it or repost it?

 

[nightswan]

"So, now I'm wondering...are you agreeing with Cobra77 in a sense, that if someone gets jealous, they are asking for it?"

Nightswan:I wasn't sayng that at all,just that, sometimes,excessive jealousy is a bad thing.

Sheath:
"And I'm even more curious...you have pointed out 'normal' people in two posts now. What exactly is your definition of normal?"

Nightswan:
Some has pointed out that some people seems to be more inclined to cheating.;i was sayng that isn't true.

Sheath:
"And please clarify something else for me. I think I understand, but I want to be sure I have this right. Because it is very difficult to find if some people are cheating, then there is no point in investigating? Even if you KNOW deep down (that gut feeling, remember?)
that someone is lying, or omitting important information that affects your relationship?"

Nightswan:
Absolutely not.There's point in investigating,even tough it's a painful journey,since it's about the respect you deserve to have from your partner.

Sheath:
"That it is good to hope for the best, but to never expect it? What happens when you DO find proof? Are you saying that because you investigated and found the proof, you deserved to be cheated upon, and the fact that you investigated just proves it? That you deserve what you get, because you aren't "secure" in yourself and willing to overlook whatever someone else may say for the sake of window dressing?"

Nightswan:
I wasn't sayng that at all.My point is , in fact,you can hope that the other person will not cheat on you- you can never be sure-NOT that you deserve what you get since you're insecure: everyone deserve love and respect,like i've always done in my relationships.If i've found out that i've been cheated , the only thing that i can do is to leave that person alone,since you have no power over him/her,that's all.He/she can do what he/she wants,but i don't have to bear with his/her way of behaving .Nobody's owns anybody else,period.Relationships are something you build and take care of everyday.If someone decide to break the trust between his/her partner,he/she will accept the consequences of that with loneliness,there's no point in being together anymore.

I hope to have cleared some things a bit..

Please express your thoughts about it,i need your feedback on this.

James G5,
thanks for pointing out this to me,i'm really sorry,i'v had a busy day.I hope now things are clearer.Please accept my apologies.

 

[James G 5]

James G5,
thanks for pointing out this to me,i'm really sorry,i'v had a busy day.I hope now things are clearer.Please accept my apologies.

no biggie man, that was much easier to follow

 

[Cycnus]

I have been following this thread and feel I need to express some opinions. Please forgive me if you disagree or dislike my stated opinions, folks.

Sir Nightswan, I feel that Sheath and Cigno de Notte have both pegged you most accurately to the board. And, quite frankly, not only have I been called most astute at judging peoples' characters by a former co-worker, I am trusted pretty uniformly by small ones (human kids, four-legged critters, winged ones, etc.). My point in saying this is that I am looking at this not only as a woman with life experience; but as a person who trusts her intuitions about the world and those around herself, and can be believed.

In other words, you stated incoherantly but rather baldly your current sense of your beliefs. When others called you on that, needing both clarity and a sense of understanding (not necessarily agreement, just understanding) of what you had posted, you seemed to turn angrily, hiss in irritation at having been caught at your true self's antics/beliefs, and then walk back towards the group while trying to charm us out of believing you could ever be capable of such anti-social behaviour.

Actually, you seem to be behaving much the same way guys I've known (and luckily not been involved with personally other than as friends, excepting one circumstance) - as the guys who cheated on or "otherwise abused" their s.o. This makes me curious, especially since you added in the bits about jealousy: Have you cheated - or felt ineffectual enough to be extremely frustrated and hence "pushed" to want to cheat - in a current or recent relationship? Or perhaps feel that a significant other (s.o.) has cheated on you, or was tempted to do so?? Is this something it would help you to discuss, as the subject of this thread regards cheating?



Cycnus

 

[Cycnus]

Re: Cheating

I got a wife of 13 years who is very jealous of me.Say's it is because her last ex cheated on her.I do nothing to bring on the accusations.I don't go out alone or with friends,come straight home from work.If I got laid as much as she has accused me of I'd be a tired s.o.b. It is about to drive me to go do it .If I got to put up with this,she may as well have a reason.

Isn't it generally a strong sign that there are control issues needing to be worked out when either person in a relationship won't stop accusing the other of trust and accountability issues?

And is frustration ever a reason to let yourself feel justified to cheat??

If you are dedicated to a life with this woman you ought to feel dedicated to the work that that entails. Also, have you asked her if she is dedicated to a life with you? And to the work that entails, as well? Because it would seem that continually accusing you of cheating would either a) wear you down into a henpecked nothing, b) drive you straight into a "justified" life of cheating on her, and/or c) simply (or eventually) drive you away, permanently.



Cycnus

 

[Cycnus]

Been thinking about starting threads on this
gotten in conversations with 2 sub ladies lately who've been in a STRING of failed one-on-ones but are disgusted & horrified by Pouty & I being poly, insisting it must all be about me wanting to have power-over the people I am with or be all about satisfying my sexual needs
The level of vehemence is disturbing

And besides, I rarely get sex, I need SOMEthing to do with all this excess energy

On the bright side I get to see Pouty tomorrow

That would certainly be an incendiary thread! Could be fun.

The main problem with those issues is that few human cultures actually are structured as anything other than strictly-monogamous family structures. Multi-generational, rare instances of matriarchal, predominantly patriarchal, and occasionally polygamous with the "intent" (via sub-structure) of producing individual men who are powerful economically and politically as well as in the gene pool by procreating successfully with numerous partners, even one where they believe that having a Second Father submit his sperm after the pregnancy is begun plus his sustanance offerings to the mother & fetus then mother and child are crucial to said child's welfare; but overall, I haven't found evidence of any cultures which successfully incorporate any or all the types of poly in the long term or the large scale into their setups. Too bad, might work (see Heinlein: The Moon is a Harsh Mistress), if applied across the board, rather than as niches in the social hierarchies.

Thing is, I've known quite a few who state that a relationship is "open" or some particular version of poly - yet none of these individuals - or their relationships - could withstand the variances of routine, loyalty, trust, economics, locations, etc. being different from the expectations of the culture they or their partner(s) grew up in. eek: Oh, no, a dangling participle!)

Another thing is that those who seek out poly relationships seem to be searching for something much more on the emotional side, regarding intangible things and issues - not sex. So I would expect the vehement insistance basing poly on sexual needs alone is pretty erroneous.

Sorry, I'm really verbose tonight.

Please let us know if you start up a thread about that, though - could be really interesting. Especially if there are claims that poly is, by definition, a form of cheating on one's mate.

Cycnus

 

[Cycnus]

Been thinking about starting threads on this
gotten in conversations with 2 sub ladies lately who've been in a STRING of failed one-on-ones but are disgusted & horrified by Pouty & I being poly, insisting it must all be about me wanting to have power-over the people I am with or be all about satisfying my sexual needs
The level of vehemence is disturbing

And besides, I rarely get sex, I need SOMEthing to do with all this excess energy

On the bright side I get to see Pouty tomorrow

That would certainly be an incendiary thread! Could be fun.

The main problem with those issues is that few human cultures actually are structured as anything other than strictly-monogamous family structures. Multi-generational, rare instances of matriarchal, predominantly patriarchal, and occasionally polygamous with the "intent" (via sub-structure) of producing individual men who are powerful economically and politically as well as in the gene pool by procreating successfully with numerous partners, even one where they believe that having a Second Father submit his sperm after the pregnancy is begun plus his sustanance offerings to the mother & fetus then mother and child are crucial to said child's welfare; but overall, I haven't found evidence of any cultures which successfully incorporate any or all the types of poly in the long term or the large scale into their setups. Too bad, might work (see Heinlein: The Moon is a Harsh Mistress), if applied across the board, rather than as niches in the social hierarchies.

Thing is, I've known quite a few who state that a relationship is "open" or some particular version of poly - yet none of these individuals - or their relationships - could withstand the variances of routine, loyalty, trust, economics, locations, etc. being different from the expectations of the culture they or their partner(s) grew up in. eek: Oh, no, a dangling participle!)

Another thing is that those who seek out poly relationships seem to be searching for something much more on the emotional side, regarding intangible things and issues - not sex. So I would expect the vehement insistance basing poly on sexual needs alone is pretty erroneous.

Sorry, I'm really verbose tonight.

Please let us know if you start up a thread about that, though - could be really interesting. Especially if there are claims that poly is, by definition, a form of cheating on one's mate.

Cycnus

 

[Cycnus]

Passionate Sheath, silly, incendiary James, Cigno di Notte cum integram (Lat. with integrity) -

Gee, I think y'all are swell!

Thanks for being you.



Cycnus

 

[Mstrskey]

Interesting stuff Sheath...

as always sugar!!

I have to laugh at some of these but I've seen quite a few of them in action too.

Like Kym, I don't think I've ever in 10 years of marriage been able to peg the scent of my husbands soap. I think I might notice if he came home smelling of women's perfume being as he works in a manufacturing plant, but I don't think I'd know his Irish Spring BO from his Lever 2000 BO.

Now as to the issue of excessive internet time...as James has said, define excessive. The article says when he stays on after you go to bed, well in my case I work 3rd shift ( or did til I got pregnant) and my husband worked 1st shift. I was always on the internet after he went to sleep!!! The man was dead to the world by 9 pm every night.
I can sort of see where secret e-mail accounts might be cause for concern but then again there's a far deeper trust issue on both sides if either partner feels they must routinely hide communications from other sources from their partner. My dear best friend has such an account. His wife (his 2nd) is very suspicious of ANY contact he has with women outside his marriage. When she would see e-mails from me she became outraged, demanding to know why he was conversing on line with another married woman. In the end against my suggestions he set up a hidden account from her to correspond with me. When she eventually found it it only further fueled her suspicion that we were doing something inappropriate. In order to pacify her he destroyed the account and I now get only very antiseptic letters from him that she has thoroughly checked for content. If he had simply not hidden things from her in the first place... oh well live and learn.

I'm inclined to agree with James that alot of these problems could be solved if people would just understand that eventually everyone is going to wonder what's on the other side of the proverbial fence and would understand that forced monogamy isn't the answer to marital happiness. But as so many of you have said, it's easier said then done for the most part. We are trained to believe that we have to find our " one" and hold onto them with an iron fist. In my marriage I've pretty much only ever asked for the truth. I know he's going to see beautiful women and be attracted. I know he's going to fantasize and that if given the opportunity he may even act. I know that asking him to spend a lifetime fighting what I think are natural urges is pretty damn stupid on my part, or on his part. So, I ask him to be honest, to be safe and smart, even if that means that one day he rolls over and realizes he's outgrown me or his feelings for me have changed or whatever. I never want to wonder where he is. I want to know that if he says he's working overtime, he's working. I want to know that if he says he's got a meeting he does. I extend my complete trust to him and he to me on the provision that if he is out having a few drinks with the guys and he strays he'll tell me. I guess it sounds simple and perhaps dumb to some but it's kept us together for 10 years. Not without problems, but trust has never been an issue I don't feel the need to check his e-mail, he shows it to me. I don't have to know where he is eery minute of the day, he calls and tells me. I do the same for him. By extending each other that open-ended trust I think if anything we've taken the pressure off and we don't have the issue of " If he/she's not gonna trust me I may as well do something to earn the accusations."

I should quit rambling now....

 

[nightswan]

Cycnus:
"Sir Nightswan, I feel that Sheath and Cigno de Notte have both pegged you most accurately to the board. And, quite frankly, not only have I been called most astute at judging peoples' characters by a former co-worker, I am trusted pretty uniformly by small ones (human kids, four-legged critters, winged ones, etc.). My point in saying this is that I am looking at this not only as a woman with life experience; but as a person who trusts her intuitions about the world and those around herself, and can be believed."

Nightswan:
I'm glad that you and other people trust your judgement.I still can't understand how you can judge people by their opinions,quite frankly.That seems to me to sell somebody short:I've learned to not judge a book by his cover,and that people aren't always what we preceive them to be.The older i get,the more i learn about not judging people on a first glance basis.Especially on such a volatile basis as an internet forum.

Cycnus:
"In other words, you stated incoherantly but rather baldly your current sense of your beliefs. When others called you on that, needing both clarity and a sense of understanding (not necessarily agreement, just understanding) of what you had posted, you seemed to turn angrily, hiss in irritation at having been caught at your true self's antics/beliefs, and then walk back towards the group while trying to charm us out of believing you could ever be capable of such anti-social behaviour."

Nightswan:
Could you please point out a me when i have turned angrily or "hissed irritation"?It didn't seems that way to me,i'm sorry,if it's been turned out that way.I did tell to "cigno di notte"to read again my post since it did seems to me that he/she did missed the point.That's all.I've sent pm to sheath too.This is something that it hasn't appeared on the posts.

Cycnus:
"Actually, you seem to be behaving much the same way guys I've known (and luckily not been involved with personally other than as friends, excepting one circumstance) - as the guys who cheated on or "otherwise abused" their s.o. This makes me curious, especially since you added in the bits about jealousy: Have you cheated - or felt ineffectual enough to be extremely frustrated and hence "pushed" to want to cheat - in a current or recent relationship? Or perhaps feel that a significant other (s.o.) has cheated on you, or was tempted to do so?? Is this something it would help you to discuss, as the subject of this thread regards cheating?"

Nighswan:
Sorry to say so,but,as i've alreay stated twice,i've never cheated on anyone,ever.
About me behaving like other guys you know,who have cheated or"otherwise abused" their s.o.,i would think twice before telling someone that,without knowing him/her.I'm sorry, but it seems that your sense of judgement has failed on that.

Most of all,i may disagree with someone about his /her opinion,but i respect them,even if i don't like them.Between that ad criticize him/her as a person,there's a long way.It may become a "holier than thou" thing.


Ad nauseam:I've said that anybody deserves love and respect in a relationship.I don't like cheating,nor approve it.I'm not fond of excessive jealousy,either.
I firmly believe that i don't own anybody,period.I can hope that things will always go in the right way,but i can never be sure***** is full of strange twists.I can only respond for myself,therefore,not for the other person's behaviour.So,i'll try
to work things out day by day,doing my best.Hopefully my partner does an will do the same.
I did hear a doctor's opinion about that,and i did report his thoughts,(see the "......." signs)ASKING FOR SOME FEEDBACK.I've put in bold letters that i was confused and i was tryn' to understand,needing some feedback form sheath,who i respect and like very much,and the other posters,like Chele or James g5,for example.It wasn't my intention to open a can of worms.I still can't understand how that has turned out to be an attack toward me as person.I have disagreed with someone's thoughts,not criticize him/her.

I hope to have make that clear,once for all.

Cycnus,i'm expressing my thoughts,here.I may disagree with your opinions,but i don't think this is a major problem.I hope to have given to you a clearer wiew about my point of wiew.I don't think i've answered in a harsh way.Let me know,ok?


Nightswan

 

[James G 5]

That would certainly be an incendiary thread! Could be fun.

The main problem with those issues is that few human cultures actually are structured as anything other than strictly-monogamous family structures. Multi-generational, rare instances of matriarchal, predominantly patriarchal, and occasionally polygamous with the "intent" (via sub-structure) of producing individual men who are powerful economically and politically as well as in the gene pool by procreating successfully with numerous partners, even one where they believe that having a Second Father submit his sperm after the pregnancy is begun plus his sustanance offerings to the mother & fetus then mother and child are crucial to said child's welfare; but overall, I haven't found evidence of any cultures which successfully incorporate any or all the types of poly in the long term or the large scale into their setups. Too bad, might work (see Heinlein: The Moon is a Harsh Mistress), if applied across the board, rather than as niches in the social hierarchies.

I'm a big Heinlen fan
But I'm not just talking about his proposed S-groups (as he called them in "Friday") but also about the option of 2 person relationships that're open to others sexually as opposed to emotionally/personally.
I've studied the history, nonesuch has existed...we would need to work to create it

Thing is, I've known quite a few who state that a relationship is "open" or some particular version of poly - yet none of these individuals - or their relationships - could withstand the variances of routine, loyalty, trust, economics, locations, etc. being different from the expectations of the culture they or their partner(s) grew up in. eek: Oh, no, a dangling participle!)

Like that many "long term monogamous" relationships survive the pressures of life? And open/poly relationships are enjoying a greater deal of success in parts of Europe where they're less sexually repressed and more accepting


Another thing is that those who seek out poly relationships seem to be searching for something much more on the emotional side, regarding intangible things and issues - not sex. So I would expect the vehement insistance basing poly on sexual needs alone is pretty erroneous.

For me poly IS more, but open & poly aren't necessarily the same thing (see above comment) one would work for some, the other for others, monogamy for still a smaller group
My initial point wasn't about those seeking outside personal/emotional fulfillment, it was about those who had them but were simply looking for sexual satisfaction [/b]

Sorry, I'm really verbose tonight.
That's quite all right


Please let us know if you start up a thread about that, though - could be really interesting. Especially if there are claims that poly is, by definition, a form of cheating on one's mate. [/b[
Just had that conversation with someone LOL
I guess I should start a few threads on it when I have some time

Cycnus

James~

 

[sheath]

Wow!

I have spent the weekend with my darling Music Man, and I just now got back online...to find that this thread has apparently exploded. That's good! Debate is good for the soul...among other things.

Nightswan: Thank you for the kind PM. You did not offend me with the things you said. I was simply trying to understand your point of view, which admittedly annoyed me. Unfortunately, I tend to agree with the posting by Cycnus in response to you. I feel that we DO have you "pegged to the board", as was so elegantly stated. That's all. Respond if you feel the need, nightswan, but your stance is clear enough to me, and frankly...very little you can say at this point will change that. But of course, it's just an internet board. I hope you don't take my sincere difference of opinion personally.

James: Three words: You GO, baby.

Cycnus: Your responses are so well-thought out and clear. I appreciate what you have had to say, on all points.

Mstrskey: I'm glad you liked the list, sweetie. It's always good to see your posts. (Especially when you bait James, lol.)

And when I recover from my long weekend of fucking, I'll write more.

S.

 

[Mstrskey]

lol....oooh Sheath had fun this weekend

me? bait James? *smiles wickedly* never in a million years. I'm skeered of James! Seriously though, James is always amazing to talk with, he's always so clearheaded and concise with his statements and mmmmm....I love a man who knows his way a round a good debate!

Now then my dear....lets have some juicy details about this wonderful weekend of yours huh?
Key~ who is living vicariously thru the sexual gratificattion of others...

 

[sheath]

Re: lol....oooh Sheath had fun this weekend

me? bait James? *smiles wickedly* never in a million years. I'm skeered of James! Seriously though, James is always amazing to talk with, he's always so clearheaded and concise with his statements and mmmmm....I love a man who knows his way a round a good debate!

Now then my dear....lets have some juicy details about this wonderful weekend of yours huh?
Key~ who is living vicariously thru the sexual gratificattion of others...

Skeered of James, eh? As we should ALL be!

I agree...he does have quite the knack for making one think, doesn't he?

My weekend? Ah...absolutely amazing. My man and I have gone through a lot, and it is made so much harder because we are often apart. (He's a musician on tour most of the year...my Music Man, gee, wonder where I came up with THAT, lol!) We had a weekend together...just us...and it was just what we needed to recharge the romance. I feel like I have fallen in love all over again...

Juicy details....hmmm...well, I discovered once again that eating lots of fruits DOES work to improve the taste of cum, because damned if it didn't taste great! We played with my favorite dildo, enjoyed all sorts of fantasies, and made sure that he came all over my body, not just inside me. My favorite sexual part? His voice calling my name while he shot his cum deep into my throat.

What images...oh, yeah...ummm...shit. Where was I?

Oh. The best part of the whole weekend, not just the 'sexual' parts? Simply lying beside my man and feeling him breathe as he slept. Ah.....bliss...A little piece of Heaven, right there here in Tennessee. Imagine that.

S.

 

[Cycnus]

Hmmm....

Greetings!

James, thank you for your fine discourse. It's always a treat to deal with a gentle-man. We should talk SF sometime: maybe Piers Anthony and his perpetual quest to prove his/the "Everyman" character can rise up to deal successfully and happily with virtually any situation he is dropped into, without having to have any superpowers, etc., etc.

Mstrskey, you are naughty, naughty: I approve. lol

Sheath, thank you for your compliments. Seems you're a real lady, even in the Heinlein sense - lol - whether or not your clothes are on!

Nightswan, well, I regret to say that my comments, though they reflected some of the same kind of irritation as Sheath had towards some of your opinions, were laid out in an attempt to give you a chance to decently explain yourself. My posts have not been attacking your posts, you personally or your stated opinions. It is unfortunate that you seem to think that I or Sheath or Cigno di Notte or others have been attacking you in any fashion.

Your posts have been contradictory and incoherent, sometimes on the extreme. They have also often not dealt with what I and others actually posted, even when you took the time to quote what you were apparently trying to respond about. I'm sorry, but I cannot honestly say that you have cleared up any mistakes in understanding. I feel that you were quite clear in each of your originally stated opinions; and I cannot be charmed into believing what I do not agree with.

Sheath, you who very elegantly and succinctly stated basically the same thing, thank you for saying it better than I. And I understand the appeal of being able to just cuddle with one's mate, feeling their whole body along the length of one's own, feeling their warmth, their heartbeat.... Miss that, cuz I don't get many opportunities to express, explore or re-establish those tactile bonds with my hubby these days. I know it's just a stage, that after these early years of giving so much of ourselves to the kids we'll get to reaffirm those ties to each other more regularly; but that doesn't make it any easier dealing with this stage. Well, except we're doing it for the best of causes, and we are sharing one of the biggest bonds two adults can: parenthood. It's good to share a strength of purpose that is reflected in the physicality of both one's love and one's biological purpose. And besides, they are so much a reflection, an extension, of each and both of us, and yet - the marvelous wonder here - be so much their own, right from the womb. wow.

Gotta do that, y'know: Revel in the wonder of life - and LIVE it.



Cycnus



(Just a side bit here: It's the Latinized version of the name, and pronounced either "Keek-nous" or "Cique-nous." )

 

[nightswan]

Dear sheath,

thanks for your answer:as i've said before,i 've just tryn to explain my point of wiew;i'm glad that other people disagree,variety is the spice of life .I was not tryn to charm anyone into my way of thinking;i did try my best to clear things out,that's all. Someone disagree with me,great!:If everyone thinks the same way,it would be a boring world.Everybody is entitled to his/her opinions. At least i hope so.I don't understand the need to "peg" someone to the board,anyway.

I'm grateful that people have given me the chance to try to explain myself.It looks strange to me the fact that other people from this forum did told me that it was looking like i was more criticized as person and that my post was looking like it has been misunderstood from the beginning.Oh well.Everybody reacts differently.

There was absolutely no problem on my part.Neither i have felt irritation(or hissed that to someone)if some of you were disagreeing.ok?




One thing i must add,but ,Cycnus,don't take it personally:The latin word for swan is "Cygnus",not cycnus.Believe me.If not, check a latin dictionary.

 

[James G 5]

James: Three words: You GO, baby.
I'll never stop

Mstrskey: I'm glad you liked the list, sweetie. It's always good to see your posts. (Especially when you bait James, lol.)
She smells like BAIT? EEeeeeeeeeewww
LOL, seriously, not like I need any help to spout off, but it's nice to have intelligent people who spark discourse around here

And when I recover from my long weekend of fucking, I'll write more.

S.

Write more hell, post stories
And videos

James~