Strip Clubs- Going as Couple?

[bailadora]

The spouse and I have made it a priority the last couple of months to be really open and honest about the things that turn us on. Like many men, he has fantasized about being with two women at once. I know enough about myself that I could never share him with anyone else, but I think one way to partially fulfill this for him is to visit a strip club with him. My thought is that we'd go, select a dancer together and then buy him a dance or two or three. She can get him all riled up and then I take him home and screw his brains out.

We've talked about it and he is excited about the prospect, but admits that he will probably be a little uncomfortable at first and might have trouble relaxing and letting himself enjoy the experience. Lord love him, he's worried about how I might feel and he doesn't want me getting hurt. I've explained that it would give me more insight into what types of women he finds attractive and that it would arouse me to watch him getting all hot and bothered . I don't know if moving out of his line of sight would be enough for him to let his guard down, so any thoughts on how I can make this a more comfortable experience for him would be greatly appreciated.

Thanks.

 

[lettinggo]

Buy a dance for you, too.

 

[bailadora]

That thought had crossed my mind... and since he likes girl/girl action would probably halfway fulfill that fantasy. Will work hard on my own inhibitions. Do SC's have more secluded areas for dances?

Any other advice?

Thanks!

 

[OzoneRed]

Well, I guess I've visited more than my share of strip clubs...

Most clubs will have a separate room for persons getting dances, so you're not in the main room of the club. How much privacy is available in that room varies by club. Usually, it's a room full of couches, so you're in full view of anyone else getting "private" dances at the time. In some clubs, small 3-sided booths are available, which offer a little more privacy.

Some clubs offer "couples dances". You and your hubby sit side-by-side on the couch, while the showgirl works you both over, cost is usually 1.5 times the cost of a single dance. Other clubs charge full price for each person.

Most showgirls who have been in the business for more than 6 months will be experienced at doing dances for somewhat shy first time female customers. Remember, you're not the first that she's seen, and she is a professional.

And please, tip the lady when you're done. Their tips are as big a percentage of their income as your waitress.

http://www.stripclublist.com can give you some info on clubs in your area. The info is maintained by the clubs themselves, so expect a little bit of hyperbole. http://www.twosheds.com will give you some less biased info, if you happen to live in Michigan.

 

[Jagged]

The first rule of couples going to strip clubs is that you should both be into it....I have spent many a night looking at couples where the girlfriend or wife is pissed off as hubby is trying to have a good time but knows once he gets home he is going to get it..not get any.

That aside I have had fun when I have brought a girlfriend or female friend. the dancers are nicer to women and are very "friendly" I had one offer to let my then girlfriend in the private room for free...unfortunately I couldn't afford it at the time but we did enjoy buy lapdances for each other. We're still friends and talk about going again at times. I was a regular at the club we went to and she liked meeting the women of my fantasies as she put it.

Best thing you can do is bring plenty of cash and have a good time.



Oh and another way to fulfill his girl on girl fantasy is to get a massage...Can be a totally above board massage done by a certified therapist, but he gets to watch you be touched by a woman. Afterwards you have some quality time...and he will love you for it and you will be very relaxed.

 

[bailadora]

Thanks Ozone and Jagged:

for chiming in. The tips regarding etiquette and club MO are very helpful. Ozone- I will definately check those links.

Jagged - thanks for the heads up on the jealousy issue, but I honestly don't think this is going to be a problem. I've never been one of those women who gets all pissed off when their spouse has the occasional night out at a club with the guys. On more than one occasion, I've had another wife or SO call me to bitch about it and I've floored them by replying that I know where he's going and I hope he enjoys himself. I trust him implicitly and quite frankly I don't care where he gets his appetite as long as he comes home for dinner .

I'm not sure he believes that this is for me as well. It gives me a peek into his head and also fulfills my voyeuristic tendencies by watching him get turned on. While she's dancing for him, I just want him to be able to really let go and forget I'm even there.

If you don't mind - would you share more of your visit with your gf? Did you start out w/ a couples or a solo dance? Ideally, I'd like for this experience to blossom into something that we do on occasion to add spice to our intimate life.

Thanks!

 

[VelvetDarkness]

Men are a lot like this. They tell you their fantasy and then , when you turn around and say "ok, let's go and do this" they're all "really? are you sure?" They assume that you mean well but when it comes to it you'll get possessive and pissed off. They don't believe that there isn't a catch.

It's admirable that you have such an open relationship and support him is his fantasies. Hope it goes well for you.

 

[bailadora]

It's admirable that you have such an open relationship and support him is his fantasies. Hope it goes well for you.

Thanks, Velvet! This is something we have only recently started to work on and it has been at times equally scary and exhilarating for us both. The heart pounding fear that comes as we reveal a fantasy we are sure is going to make our partner revile us only to find out that they are ok with said fantasy and are even open to making some aspects of it a reality. The sense of liberation is hard to describe and the change in our relationship has been incredible. It's like we are newlyweds again, instead of old married farts.

Regarding the jealousy/possessive issue - I think that for me it's all about the context of how the fantasy is brought to reality. Having this particular fantasy of his happen in a strip club feels safe to me. I know that these girls are professionals and that this is what they do for a living. I know that they are not on the prowl, so I'm perfectly fine with another woman enticing him in this setting. Transfer the same scenario to a social situation and hell yeah, I'm going to have issues with it.

That being said - I think if we are clear about where the boundaries are, no one's going to get hurt- emotional or otherwise.

 

[Jagged]

If you don't mind - would you share more of your visit with your gf? Did you start out w/ a couples or a solo dance? Ideally, I'd like for this experience to blossom into something that we do on occasion to add spice to our intimate life.

Thanks![/QUOTE]

Not much to tell on that visit...been there with women. One club I had a great time drinking with a bunch of lesbians (four of them three chairs I was a gentlemen and we all had a great time). As to with the girlfriend we got solo dances...the chairs at that place were better for that. She enjoyed hers and said you should have fun with her...It was cool time and several of the girls came and sat and drank with us. My only regret is I didn't bring enough cash. And you should bring cash clubs charge you a bundle for use of the card when getting a room and they short you and the girl. Also make sure you know the price on stuff...it is fun but still business. Many women that I know that have gone and talk to after say, "that was fun I see why guys go" If your secure enough which it sounds like you are cool...

As with anything else in relationships communication is very key...keep talking about it. May become a regular thing you do. I know one couple and she is bi...she wouldn't cheat but she enjoys the release she gets from going to the club with her husband...he gets ambushed at home I'm sure...lol

 

[subwannabe]

I think he would find it very, very hot if he were to watch you get a lapdance. I would very seriouosly consider it.

 

[tkinsc]

My wife and I have been to strip clubs together several times. These have been by far the hottest and most enjoyable time I have had at strip clubs.

I would recommend sitting at the stage or table for a while before you bought an individual dance. It give you plenty of time to observe the women to see who your husband is interested in, and to see who seems interested in dancing for a couple. In our experiences, the dancers pay plenty of attention to my wife, and appear to appreciate that she is paying attention to them. The dancers have been more open and talkative when I have been with my wife, and seem to welcome that I’m not just a guy wanting to horn in on them.

After a few dances, with plenty of tipping, select someone for a table/lap dance for you and your husband. I enjoy seeing my wife receive a lap dance more than receiving one myself.

We have had a FMF in the past, but something about seeing a dancer interacting so close to your wife is incredibly sensual.

By the time we leave, I can’t wait to get my wife home and fuck her brains out.

Hope both of you enjoy your experience.

 

[evesdream]

The only thing I can add is agreement with some of what's been said.
Tip tip tip for sure.
And consider getting dances yourself. When your husband sees that you're having a good time too he'll feel a lot more relaxed. It will help the dancer to relax too---I dance myself and I know there's a bit of reluctance sometimes to dance for couples, because it isn't unknown for the female half of the couple to end up angry when her partner looks like he's having too much of a good time, and end up taking it out on the dancer.
Best of luck, I hope you have fun

 

[bailadora]

Thanks, everyone for the excellent advice.

Sub - Yep - getting a dance for myself seems to be the consensus - so I probably will. Just need to work on overcoming my initial shyness .

Tkinsc - Thanks for sharing your experiences and the advice is very much appreciated. I'm hoping that our adventure is similar to yours - especially the aftermath!

Evesdream - thanks for providing input from the dancer's point of view. I really, really appreciate it. I hope it's ok - I sent you a PM with a couple more questions.


Now - all we have to do is decide on when and where. I'm looking forward to seeing how this plays out.

 

[PublicAffection]

I have gone to the strip club with my fiancee a couple of times, and we both really enjoy it. Both times we have gone in groups of friends, and that makes it a bit more relaxed - you don't feel as awkward and out of your own element.

DEFINATELY sit at the stage!! All of the men (not just your hubby) will enjoy watching the dancer lavish attention on you. Dancers prefer to dance for other women because we are less likely to be handy/grabby and rude. It also generally generates more tips for the dancer because all the men get riled up watching her dance for another woman.

When we have done the lapdance thing, we paid for me to have a lapdance only. We hung out for a couple of hours and I picked the girl who I was most comfortable with, we went into the VIP area (as stated above, basically a smaller room filled with couches) and the dancer was comfortable with my fiancee watching so he was able to watch from across the room.

It is a TON of fun if you have half a sense of humor and you are able to let your hair down. I highly reccomend it!!

 

[bailadora]

.... we went into the VIP area (as stated above, basically a smaller room filled with couches) and the dancer was comfortable with my fiancee watching so he was able to watch from across the room.

Yep - PA - I'm gonna check into this. I think a bit more seclusion for the first dance will help ease some of my shyness. Thanks for chiming in. I think this is going to be really fun!

 

[Dreamliner]

Go for it provided you are both keen. Be pleasant to the professional strippers as they do work hard. You will find they are more than willing to provide you with a great strip tease.

Tip the girl(s) and have fun.

 

[Odball]

Suggested research

bailadora:

Therre is a website which rates the strip clubs as well as many of the dancers. It is nationwide and should be helpful to you. Aspd.net. Look up your city and see what the clubs and dancers are like.

Warning: The old saying of "You will get fucked but not laid" is not necessarily true. While the dancers are professionals, the profession can be the oldest one.
The level of dances will be 1) air dances; 2) grind in the lap in an attempt to get the customer off; 3)very touchy-feely in an attempt to get the customer off again; 4) touchy-feely, skin to skin (hand and or mouth); 5) the ultimate touching.

4&5 always will require additional payment the amount being negotiable.

I'm not saying that this is the case of where your hubby goes or that he has ever done so. But check out the website. You don't want to tell the dancer "Give him your best shot" and find out just what that shot is.

I do speak of experience in my area.

Odball

 

[Jagged]

I always say be nice...Being polite and respectful with the women there goes a long way. I just talked to a friend who used to dance. Three kids later she has some curves...which I love but she talked about being skinnier and swing around the pole and hearing how guys thought she was too fat...

Me I am nice and I find I get along very well with the women and it is more of friendly experience as well an erotic one. That is not to say there are women that aren't rude and want to seperate you from your money with as little effort as possible. Some are down right mean so find someone your comfortable with and enjoy the time.

Did run into a couple once with a group of people...A bacholar/bacholarett party. I simply congradulated them and the couple gave me a beer. The more you communicate the more fun you can have together.

 

[Tony_Stark]

Follow Up?

Did you ever make it out to a SC together?

 

[NestleSnipes]

http://i.dailymail.co.uk/i/pix/2010/05/13/article-0-000293481000044C-604_468x415.jpg

 

[silverwhisper]

bailadora quoth:
i know enough about myself that i could never share him with anyone else, but i think one way to partially fulfill this for him is to visit a strip club with him. my thought is that we'd go, select a dancer together and then buy him a dance or two or three. she can get him all riled up and then i take him home and screw his brains out.

how did i never see this thread before?!

bail, kudos for your self-awareness on the subject. i understand that couples going to a strip club/gentlemen's club/whatever isn't exactly uncommon. i think that your idea makes a great deal of sense and this is a great way to explore some element of his feelings.

i'm very curious to know how the picture has changed--if at all--since your OP.

ed

 

[bailadora]

Did you ever make it out to a SC together?

how did i never see this thread before?!

bail, kudos for your self-awareness on the subject. i understand that couples going to a strip club/gentlemen's club/whatever isn't exactly uncommon. i think that your idea makes a great deal of sense and this is a great way to explore some element of his feelings.

i'm very curious to know how the picture has changed--if at all--since your OP.

ed

Wow! Talk about a blast from the past.

So, yes we did manage to go and a good time was had by all. We've not had an opportunity for a repeat visit, but this is something I'd do again. Our dancer was great and afterwards she gave me some awesome ideas for my own in-house performance.

http://i.dailymail.co.uk/i/pix/2010/05/13/article-0-000293481000044C-604_468x415.jpg

Nestle, I'm not following your train of thought.

 

[silverwhisper]

bailadora quoth:
our dancer was great and afterwards she gave me some awesome ideas for my own in-house performance.

who knew, exotic dancers can be a marital aid!

ed

 

[bailadora]

There's information to be found all over the place. 'Course we made sure to tip generously, so I'm sure that helped as well.

 

[bad_dave]

My girlfriend and I went to a lapdancing club for my birthday, and all the girls ingnored us while they were walking around, in the end she went and brought one over.