Sunday Special

[Hypoxia]

In honour of the solstice, a group of churchgoers decide to make like pagans and dance naked under the stars in the old cemetery behind the church.

You know that a Sunday Night Special ain't the same as a Saturday Night Special, right? Anyway, what churchgoers (other than members of the Church of the Naked Christ) go dancing skyclad, daytime or nighttime? With or without their Specials at hand. Sure, humans are born naked and die naked so we may as well dance naked, too. Zappa wrote a song about that:

There will come a time when everybody who is lonely will be free to sing and dance and love

There will come a time when every evil that we know will be an evil that we can rise above

Who cares if you're so poor you can't afford to buy a pair of mod a-go-go stretch elastic pants?

There will come a time when you can even take your clothes off when you dance!
Wa-wa-wa-waaaah...​

I think Clapton played guitar on that one. Groovy, baby.

 

[sirhugs]

You know that a Sunday Night Special ain't the same as a Saturday Night Special, right? Anyway, what churchgoers (other than members of the Church of the Naked Christ) go dancing skyclad, daytime or nighttime? With or without their Specials at hand. Sure, humans are born naked and die naked so we may as well dance naked, too. Zappa wrote a song about that:

There will come a time when everybody who is lonely will be free to sing and dance and love

There will come a time when every evil that we know will be an evil that we can rise above

Who cares if you're so poor you can't afford to buy a pair of mod a-go-go stretch elastic pants?

There will come a time when you can even take your clothes off when you dance!
Wa-wa-wa-waaaah...​

I think Clapton played guitar on that one. Groovy, baby.

thank you for providing this Sunday's special.

 

[sirhugs]

And after church this Sunday, the annual 4th of July picnic results in lots of babies in nine months.

What sort of fireworks occur?

 

[sirhugs]

what happens if the tentacle monsters get religion?

 

[Hypoxia]

what happens if the tentacle monsters get religion?

Depends on the religion. Are they dumb enough to be suckered by Scientologists, Mormons, Southern Baptists? Suppose they worship Kali, goddess of death, or Priapus, god of big dicks? What a pickle!

 

[sirhugs]

Depends on the religion. Are they dumb enough to be suckered by Scientologists, Mormons, Southern Baptists? Suppose they worship Kali, goddess of death, or Priapus, god of big dicks? What a pickle!

Is there a God of pickles?

 

[Hypoxia]

Is there a God of pickles?

You can google that and find the answer is yes, in Japan, anyway. Aichi shrine worships pickles god (paywall). Suck it up.

 

[sirhugs]

You can google that and find the answer is yes, in Japan, anyway. Aichi shrine worships pickles god (paywall). Suck it up.

I think you meant "pucker up".

 

[Hypoxia]

Follow my link above. It turns out that many Euro cultures have/had gods overseeing pickling and related fermentation, gods who extend(ed) foods and beverages past their pull dates. A wise god preserves their foods in vodka, not brine. Pucker and swallow.

Those pickled gods often required careful worship rituals to invoke them. Let's have a Ukrainian sect that stages community orgies at all pickling / brewing sessions because they keep the pagan traditions, carefully turning their pickle god into an Vatican-acceptable saint. The local priest gets pickled, too, and oversees the village children off-stage while the adults party for sanctity.

 

[sirhugs]

Follow my link above. It turns out that many Euro cultures have/had gods overseeing pickling and related fermentation, gods who extend(ed) foods and beverages past their pull dates. A wise god preserves their foods in vodka, not brine. Pucker and swallow.

Those pickled gods often required careful worship rituals to invoke them. Let's have a Ukrainian sect that stages community orgies at all pickling / brewing sessions because they keep the pagan traditions, carefully turning their pickle god into an Vatican-acceptable saint. The local priest gets pickled, too, and oversees the village children off-stage while the adults party for sanctity.

don't pick on Ukrainians. Some of them are my relatives... but yeah, they are pickled most of the time.

 

[Zionisacat]

Is there a God of pickles?

How thinly can you slice a god?

 

[Hypoxia]

How thinly can you slice a god?

It's not the slicing, it's the brining. Sliced Poseidon? Sure. With Dijon mustard.

 

[sirhugs]

It's not the slicing, it's the brining. Sliced Poseidon? Sure. With Dijon mustard.

a little corned beef?

 

[Hypoxia]

a little corned beef?

All sea goddesses and gods are salty dogs so sure, eat-em up. Are there Celtic / Irish deities for corn'd beef, cabbage, and potatoes? Wash-down with Guinness.

 

[sirhugs]

All sea goddesses and gods are salty dogs so sure, eat-em up. Are there Celtic / Irish deities for corn'd beef, cabbage, and potatoes? Wash-down with Guinness.

The Irish do say it is the nectar of the gods.

 

[sirhugs]

All sea goddesses and gods are salty dogs so sure, eat-em up. Are there Celtic / Irish deities for corn'd beef, cabbage, and potatoes? Wash-down with Guinness.

You've obviously been hanging out with the upper crust. Most of the lads and lasses can't afford corned beef, except maybe on Sundays.

 

[sirhugs]

Then there is the church where , during the Lit Summer Lovin' Contest, instead of sermons the minister reads a story from the pulpit, to encourage lots of healthy fornication, and the making of babies.

 

[Hypoxia]

Then there is the church where , during the Lit Summer Lovin' Contest, instead of sermons the minister reads a story from the pulpit, to encourage lots of healthy fornication, and the making of babies.

The rev had best avoid LW stories, lest many murders result.

 

[sirhugs]

The rev had best avoid LW stories, lest many murders result.

or one heckuva tug of war at the picnic between Team BTB and Team RAAC

 

[sirhugs]

It is the Sunday of a long weekend in summer, and only the pastor, the organist and four soloists show up at church...

 

[Hypoxia]

It is the Sunday of a long weekend in summer, and only the pastor, the organist and four soloists show up at church...

Make that the priest, the organist, and four choirboys. Father serves spiked sacramental wine. Just like the prior times.

 

[sirhugs]

Make that the priest, the organist, and four choirboys. Father serves spiked sacramental wine. Just like the prior times.

doesn't anybody wonder when the choirboys start turning up pregnant?

 

[Hypoxia]

doesn't anybody wonder when the choirboys start turning up pregnant?

¡Milagros! Miracles! It's Lord {JHWH}'s will! Next up, the water-to-wine trick. Then the transfiguration trick. Do these happen every Sunday? Maybe on Saturdays for Adventists. Or were weekends mixed-up with the adoption of the Gregorian calendar?

EDIT: There's a plot bunny in hiding! What are thought of as Sundays now, really aren't, because calendar reconfigurations. So Sunday miracles and orgies had best happen on Wednesdays (Odin's Days). Time to go pagan, hey?

 

[sirhugs]

¡Milagros! Miracles! It's Lord {JHWH}'s will! Next up, the water-to-wine trick. Then the transfiguration trick. Do these happen every Sunday? Maybe on Saturdays for Adventists. Or were weekends mixed-up with the adoption of the Gregorian calendar?

EDIT: There's a plot bunny in hiding! What are though of as Sundays now, really aren't, because calendar reconfigurations. So Sunday miracles and orgies had best happen on Wednesdays (Odin's Days). Time to go pagan, hey?

that means sunrise celebrations. and what better celebration than sex?

 

[Hypoxia]

that means sunrise celebrations. and what better celebration than sex?

Sex (with anyone 18+), drugs (including ergot fungus), rockin' music (even if played on panpipes) -- ringing-in the dawn, hey? Deities are naked and horny so their worshippers should be, too. Why wait till a calendrical Sunday?