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The Every Thread In The Pg Thread In One Thread

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Instead of doing homework, I'm writing a story. I don't know if I will ever finish it, or if anyone will ever read it. We'll see where it goes.
 
1. I am very easy to get along with.
2. I have a wicked sweet tooth.
3. My friends call me mamita
 
There are two how to's in this world that I feel should be federally funded. No one tells you what to do when you are kissing down a woman's stomach and you make that first contact with a woman's vagina with something other than your fingers or the zipper seam of your jeans. There is no government pamphlet on how to eat pussy correctly.

You are less than an inch away from the oddest looking piece of flesh you have ever seen. You have anxiously waited for this moment and now that it is here you kinda wish you could throw your jeans back on and dry hump her till you have no more skin on your cock and you can't take the pain anymore. Unfortunately there is no turning back at that time because if you do you will never get to put your penis in any orifice of hers again.

There is no starting point. This strange beast is pulsating, leaking, and even winking at you to come and make it feel good. The smell is like nothing you have smelled before. The heat that radiate from it makes you instinctively lick your lips. Which actually is a good thing because it makes her feel like you are excited to be down there and am enjoying what you are seeing.

So where do you begin? The pulsating red tony penis staring at you? The hole that is leaking and drooling like I get when I know she is taking the kiddo somewhere and I will have a few precious moments of quiet to get some sleep. Well after I jerk off of course. There isn't a roadmap for eating pussy correctly. Most of us just jump right like the gun sounded for a state fair pie eating contest and before we know it we unsuction ourselves just moments before we pass out because we forgot to take a breath before we dove in. Needless to say without the "subtle" hints of our girl rotating her hips and grabbing fistfuls of hair to guide us in the direction we need to go, we would be totally lost.

That brings me to the second activity in which there should be a subsidized how to program. That is changing a baby's diaper at 3am without getting that sticky tar all over the fucking place causing you to say words you would never say in front of an adult much less a 4 month old.

It does not matter how delicate and careful you are, you are going to have shit fingers. Someone needs to invent baby wipes in beach towel size. That way I can wrap him up like we do when he goes to bed. There would be less of a chance of me staring at myself in the bathroom mirror while using a scrub brush to get poo out of my cuticles.

Top it off that the little guy loves to turn into a human mall fountain as soon as cold air hits his little fella and well you have any scat lovers dream come true. Because honestly at 3am who is thinking don't forget he likes to bukake you with his urine so remember the Dixie cup when removing that loaded shit diaper you are doing your best not to get all over yourself.

Whoever decided that trying to cover a baby penis, while wiping a dirty ass, that includes the disposal and changing of a diaper with one hand at 3am should be done by one person should be drug out back and put down. I am to the point now they when he starts crying and it is my turn to get up I just go start the shower because I know I am going to either have puss or shit on me. If I didn't think a hazmat suit would scar him for life I would treat him like E.T. from now on.

So there really needs to be some mailers on how to do both of these tasks. Not at the same time mind you, but a way to prepare us for those times when we need to be on our game and we aren't feeling it. The last time I felt anxious and unsure about what to do when I was changing his diaper, was when Amy opened her legs and shoved my head down there. Neither he nor she said anything, they just expected me to automatically know what to do.both caused me to hop in the shower immediately after I was finished.
 
IhateClowns said:
There are two how to's in this world that I feel should be federally funded. No one tells you what to do when you are kissing down a woman's stomach and you make that first contact with a woman's vagina with something other than your fingers or the zipper seam of your jeans. There is no government pamphlet on how to eat pussy correctly.

You are less than an inch away from the oddest looking piece of flesh you have ever seen. You have anxiously waited for this moment and now that it is here you kinda wish you could throw your jeans back on and dry hump her till you have no more skin on your cock and you can't take the pain anymore. Unfortunately there is no turning back at that time because if you do you will never get to put your penis in any orifice of hers again.

There is no starting point. This strange beast is pulsating, leaking, and even winking at you to come and make it feel good. The smell is like nothing you have smelled before. The heat that radiate from it makes you instinctively lick your lips. Which actually is a good thing because it makes her feel like you are excited to be down there and am enjoying what you are seeing.

So where do you begin? The pulsating red tony penis staring at you? The hole that is leaking and drooling like I get when I know she is taking the kiddo somewhere and I will have a few precious moments of quiet to get some sleep. Well after I jerk off of course. There isn't a roadmap for eating pussy correctly. Most of us just jump right like the gun sounded for a state fair pie eating contest and before we know it we unsuction ourselves just moments before we pass out because we forgot to take a breath before we dove in. Needless to say without the "subtle" hints of our girl rotating her hips and grabbing fistfuls of hair to guide us in the direction we need to go, we would be totally lost.

That brings me to the second activity in which there should be a subsidized how to program. That is changing a baby's diaper at 3am without getting that sticky tar all over the fucking place causing you to say words you would never say in front of an adult much less a 4 month old.

It does not matter how delicate and careful you are, you are going to have shit fingers. Someone needs to invent baby wipes in beach towel size. That way I can wrap him up like we do when he goes to bed. There would be less of a chance of me staring at myself in the bathroom mirror while using a scrub brush to get poo out of my cuticles.

Top it off that the little guy loves to turn into a human mall fountain as soon as cold air hits his little fella and well you have any scat lovers dream come true. Because honestly at 3am who is thinking don't forget he likes to bukake you with his urine so remember the Dixie cup when removing that loaded shit diaper you are doing your best not to get all over yourself.

Whoever decided that trying to cover a baby penis, while wiping a dirty ass, that includes the disposal and changing of a diaper with one hand at 3am should be done by one person should be drug out back and put down. I am to the point now they when he starts crying and it is my turn to get up I just go start the shower because I know I am going to either have puss or shit on me. If I didn't think a hazmat suit would scar him for life I would treat him like E.T. from now on.

So there really needs to be some mailers on how to do both of these tasks. Not at the same time mind you, but a way to prepare us for those times when we need to be on our game and we aren't feeling it. The last time I felt anxious and unsure about what to do when I was changing his diaper, was when Amy opened her legs and shoved my head down there. Neither he nor she said anything, they just expected me to automatically know what to do.both caused me to hop in the shower immediately after I was finished.
Click to expand...

I love it, your humor and class is missed around here........Stop by more often......:):):)
 
IhateClowns said:
There are two how to's in this world that I feel should be federally funded. No one tells you what to do when you are kissing down a woman's stomach and you make that first contact with a woman's vagina with something other than your fingers or the zipper seam of your jeans. There is no government pamphlet on how to eat pussy correctly.

You are less than an inch away from the oddest looking piece of flesh you have ever seen. You have anxiously waited for this moment and now that it is here you kinda wish you could throw your jeans back on and dry hump her till you have no more skin on your cock and you can't take the pain anymore. Unfortunately there is no turning back at that time because if you do you will never get to put your penis in any orifice of hers again.

There is no starting point. This strange beast is pulsating, leaking, and even winking at you to come and make it feel good. The smell is like nothing you have smelled before. The heat that radiate from it makes you instinctively lick your lips. Which actually is a good thing because it makes her feel like you are excited to be down there and am enjoying what you are seeing.

So where do you begin? The pulsating red tony penis staring at you? The hole that is leaking and drooling like I get when I know she is taking the kiddo somewhere and I will have a few precious moments of quiet to get some sleep. Well after I jerk off of course. There isn't a roadmap for eating pussy correctly. Most of us just jump right like the gun sounded for a state fair pie eating contest and before we know it we unsuction ourselves just moments before we pass out because we forgot to take a breath before we dove in. Needless to say without the "subtle" hints of our girl rotating her hips and grabbing fistfuls of hair to guide us in the direction we need to go, we would be totally lost.

That brings me to the second activity in which there should be a subsidized how to program. That is changing a baby's diaper at 3am without getting that sticky tar all over the fucking place causing you to say words you would never say in front of an adult much less a 4 month old.

It does not matter how delicate and careful you are, you are going to have shit fingers. Someone needs to invent baby wipes in beach towel size. That way I can wrap him up like we do when he goes to bed. There would be less of a chance of me staring at myself in the bathroom mirror while using a scrub brush to get poo out of my cuticles.

Top it off that the little guy loves to turn into a human mall fountain as soon as cold air hits his little fella and well you have any scat lovers dream come true. Because honestly at 3am who is thinking don't forget he likes to bukake you with his urine so remember the Dixie cup when removing that loaded shit diaper you are doing your best not to get all over yourself.

Whoever decided that trying to cover a baby penis, while wiping a dirty ass, that includes the disposal and changing of a diaper with one hand at 3am should be done by one person should be drug out back and put down. I am to the point now they when he starts crying and it is my turn to get up I just go start the shower because I know I am going to either have puss or shit on me. If I didn't think a hazmat suit would scar him for life I would treat him like E.T. from now on.

So there really needs to be some mailers on how to do both of these tasks. Not at the same time mind you, but a way to prepare us for those times when we need to be on our game and we aren't feeling it. The last time I felt anxious and unsure about what to do when I was changing his diaper, was when Amy opened her legs and shoved my head down there. Neither he nor she said anything, they just expected me to automatically know what to do.both caused me to hop in the shower immediately after I was finished.
Click to expand...

Cliff notes, please.

Great to see you, bro!
 
IhateClowns said:
There are two how to's in this world that I feel should be federally funded. No one tells you what to do when you are kissing down a woman's stomach and you make that first contact with a woman's vagina with something other than your fingers or the zipper seam of your jeans. There is no government pamphlet on how to eat pussy correctly.

You are less than an inch away from the oddest looking piece of flesh you have ever seen. You have anxiously waited for this moment and now that it is here you kinda wish you could throw your jeans back on and dry hump her till you have no more skin on your cock and you can't take the pain anymore. Unfortunately there is no turning back at that time because if you do you will never get to put your penis in any orifice of hers again.

There is no starting point. This strange beast is pulsating, leaking, and even winking at you to come and make it feel good. The smell is like nothing you have smelled before. The heat that radiate from it makes you instinctively lick your lips. Which actually is a good thing because it makes her feel like you are excited to be down there and am enjoying what you are seeing.

So where do you begin? The pulsating red tony penis staring at you? The hole that is leaking and drooling like I get when I know she is taking the kiddo somewhere and I will have a few precious moments of quiet to get some sleep. Well after I jerk off of course. There isn't a roadmap for eating pussy correctly. Most of us just jump right like the gun sounded for a state fair pie eating contest and before we know it we unsuction ourselves just moments before we pass out because we forgot to take a breath before we dove in. Needless to say without the "subtle" hints of our girl rotating her hips and grabbing fistfuls of hair to guide us in the direction we need to go, we would be totally lost.

That brings me to the second activity in which there should be a subsidized how to program. That is changing a baby's diaper at 3am without getting that sticky tar all over the fucking place causing you to say words you would never say in front of an adult much less a 4 month old.

It does not matter how delicate and careful you are, you are going to have shit fingers. Someone needs to invent baby wipes in beach towel size. That way I can wrap him up like we do when he goes to bed. There would be less of a chance of me staring at myself in the bathroom mirror while using a scrub brush to get poo out of my cuticles.

Top it off that the little guy loves to turn into a human mall fountain as soon as cold air hits his little fella and well you have any scat lovers dream come true. Because honestly at 3am who is thinking don't forget he likes to bukake you with his urine so remember the Dixie cup when removing that loaded shit diaper you are doing your best not to get all over yourself.

Whoever decided that trying to cover a baby penis, while wiping a dirty ass, that includes the disposal and changing of a diaper with one hand at 3am should be done by one person should be drug out back and put down. I am to the point now they when he starts crying and it is my turn to get up I just go start the shower because I know I am going to either have puss or shit on me. If I didn't think a hazmat suit would scar him for life I would treat him like E.T. from now on.

So there really needs to be some mailers on how to do both of these tasks. Not at the same time mind you, but a way to prepare us for those times when we need to be on our game and we aren't feeling it. The last time I felt anxious and unsure about what to do when I was changing his diaper, was when Amy opened her legs and shoved my head down there. Neither he nor she said anything, they just expected me to automatically know what to do.both caused me to hop in the shower immediately after I was finished.
Click to expand...

Brilliant!
 
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