The Horny Unicorn
- Thread starter Imoen
- Start date
kitsuke
Literotica Guru
- Joined
- Aug 10, 2001
- Posts
- 905
Kitsuke
"Domo arigato gozaimasu... er, shugenja-san." Kistuke said akwardly to the woman who had just healed him, realizing belatedly he did not know her name. "I am indebted to you. Has anyone seen where my wife went? I could have sworn I saw here a moment ago..?"
Looking around he spies all the new arrivals and gets a slightly annoyed look on his face, almost grumpy but not quite. What a fine way to spend a honeymoon this would be. Oh well, if their nighttime noises disturbed anyone then it was their fault for listening.
Setting off at a swift walk he made his way back toward the campsite, pausing shortly to look at the tree Thorr had slain. "Foliage must be getting restless." He says simply, then smiles and continues.
"Domo arigato gozaimasu... er, shugenja-san." Kistuke said akwardly to the woman who had just healed him, realizing belatedly he did not know her name. "I am indebted to you. Has anyone seen where my wife went? I could have sworn I saw here a moment ago..?"
Looking around he spies all the new arrivals and gets a slightly annoyed look on his face, almost grumpy but not quite. What a fine way to spend a honeymoon this would be. Oh well, if their nighttime noises disturbed anyone then it was their fault for listening.
Setting off at a swift walk he made his way back toward the campsite, pausing shortly to look at the tree Thorr had slain. "Foliage must be getting restless." He says simply, then smiles and continues.
Isolde
Guardian's Desire
- Joined
- Dec 27, 2000
- Posts
- 4,432
Isolde had thrown up her hands at the crowd that had gathered and went back to the campsite to prepare the fish she had caught.
She hoped the men remembered to bring back something from the hunt. With the growing number of people, they were going to need it.
She hoped the men remembered to bring back something from the hunt. With the growing number of people, they were going to need it.
Cherise
Cherise had seen Creeps stumble and fall and then the treebeast attacked. She was about to conjur up a spell to blast it to bits when Thorr stepped in with his mighty anger and even mightier weapon.
Running to Creep's side she helped him out of the way of Thorr's blows and begin to look him over.
"Are you okay?," She said with worry on her face.
Cherise had seen Creeps stumble and fall and then the treebeast attacked. She was about to conjur up a spell to blast it to bits when Thorr stepped in with his mighty anger and even mightier weapon.
Running to Creep's side she helped him out of the way of Thorr's blows and begin to look him over.
"Are you okay?," She said with worry on her face.
The_high_king
Literotica Guru
- Joined
- Aug 1, 2001
- Posts
- 1,846
Creeps
"I'm okay, thanks". I reached, and grabbed her handas she helped me up. I dusted myself off, "so... I geuss we should head back to camp".
"I'm okay, thanks". I reached, and grabbed her handas she helped me up. I dusted myself off, "so... I geuss we should head back to camp".
Wedding Invitation
When Isolde entered the camp, a tall massive figure was waiting for her. He was immensely huge, almost as large as Thorr, and covered in the impenetrable armor of a Black Dragon. His craggy face and pitch black eyes gave him a cruel, evil look.
Before the barbarian woman could speak, the big man spoke first. His deep, booming voice emenated throughout the forest. "I have been searching for you for days. I am Vhagram the Black Blade, former general of Mergale the Dreaded, and now servant of the Light. My mistress had been touched by your kind gesture from before, and kindly invites you to the Holy City to attend her wedding ceremony. It shall be an opulent ceremony, plenty of famous guests, and free gourmet cuisine. Please attend."
Vhagram bowed low and awaited Isolde's answer.
When Isolde entered the camp, a tall massive figure was waiting for her. He was immensely huge, almost as large as Thorr, and covered in the impenetrable armor of a Black Dragon. His craggy face and pitch black eyes gave him a cruel, evil look.
Before the barbarian woman could speak, the big man spoke first. His deep, booming voice emenated throughout the forest. "I have been searching for you for days. I am Vhagram the Black Blade, former general of Mergale the Dreaded, and now servant of the Light. My mistress had been touched by your kind gesture from before, and kindly invites you to the Holy City to attend her wedding ceremony. It shall be an opulent ceremony, plenty of famous guests, and free gourmet cuisine. Please attend."
Vhagram bowed low and awaited Isolde's answer.
Cherise
"Just hold on to me," Cherise said as she moved Creeps' arm around her waist and she took hold of his waist. "That is until you feel you are steady enough on your own."
Moving past the pile of toothpicks that lay on the ground she guided Creeps down the path walking very slowly. Not because she was worried about him but because she didnt feel like getting back to the camp and with other people in a hurry.
"Just hold on to me," Cherise said as she moved Creeps' arm around her waist and she took hold of his waist. "That is until you feel you are steady enough on your own."
Moving past the pile of toothpicks that lay on the ground she guided Creeps down the path walking very slowly. Not because she was worried about him but because she didnt feel like getting back to the camp and with other people in a hurry.
kitsuke
Literotica Guru
- Joined
- Aug 10, 2001
- Posts
- 905
Kitsuke
Making a quick detour to claim his hunt kill Kitsuke makes a beeline for camp and tosses it down at the perimeter. Kneeling next to it he pulls out a small aiguchi (oriental knife/dagger) and starts the dressing process.
Looking at the plethora of fish Isolde managed to snare he laughs and says, "Did you catch them or give them an ultimatum, my love?"
Chuckling he strips the deer of it's skin along it's flank and begins to cut meat out in strips, careful to avoid contact with his armor.
Making a quick detour to claim his hunt kill Kitsuke makes a beeline for camp and tosses it down at the perimeter. Kneeling next to it he pulls out a small aiguchi (oriental knife/dagger) and starts the dressing process.
Looking at the plethora of fish Isolde managed to snare he laughs and says, "Did you catch them or give them an ultimatum, my love?"
Chuckling he strips the deer of it's skin along it's flank and begins to cut meat out in strips, careful to avoid contact with his armor.
Isolde
Guardian's Desire
- Joined
- Dec 27, 2000
- Posts
- 4,432
Isolde was startled when the dark figure appeared in the camp and she was about to say something to him when Kitsuke returned.
"Kitsuke," She said,"It seems we have been invited to a wedding."
To the black figure, she said,"We have several friends here. Would they be invited also?"
"Kitsuke," She said,"It seems we have been invited to a wedding."
To the black figure, she said,"We have several friends here. Would they be invited also?"
The_high_king
Literotica Guru
- Joined
- Aug 1, 2001
- Posts
- 1,846
Creeps
I was feeling pretty lucky today, first I find out that Cherise likes me, and we're going to get invited to a wedding, "I would love to go. How about you Cherise?"
I was feeling pretty lucky today, first I find out that Cherise likes me, and we're going to get invited to a wedding, "I would love to go. How about you Cherise?"
Vhagram
Vhagram nodded his head. "So, all of you are coming. Excellent."
He turned to leave, but quickly stopped. In a voice eerie and hollow, he spoke. "But be warned. To journey to the Holy City, you must take one of two courses... "
The wind blew threw the dead trees of the woods, its frightening whisper rustling the leaves.
"The first be long and treacherous... you must travel a hundred thousand paces to the south, whereupon you will come upon a dreadful bog, the smell whereupon would kill many normal men. Within this bog is the vile sorcerer, Hackenades, who will shoot you with deadly lightningbolts for no good reason.
"If you be strong, or lucky enough to pass this evil bog, beyond it lies a fearsome desert, from which the bleached bones of those foolish enough to enter it are found. This vast sand pile stretches for many leagues, but cross it you must.
"After surviving this harrowing desert, you will come upon the dominion of the Harpy Queen. Be not fooled, for this queen be a man! Yes, a man this queen be, so be not be fooled by she!
"Beyond the Harpy Qeen's lands lie the Horrible Hordes of Hordak. Here you must fight through a gauntlet of the Barbarian King's mightiest warriors. If you manage to defeat them, you will face Hordak himself. The victor of this epic fight shall be crowned King of the Horde, and shall forever live in history as King of the Horde.
"The last trial lies past the Horde, in the dreaded Land of the Frogs. This beautiful nation was once besieged by evil fascists, yet through the help of many nations the inhabitants of this land, the Prissy Frogs, were freed of their oppressors. Yet after their liberation, the Frogs became rude and snotty and generally not very nice to be around. They wear berrets and smoke and drink, and look their noses down upon all other nations of the world. They even swindle visitors to their nation, many of whom are members of the kingdoms who saved these Frogs, and treat them very rudely. If you humans are capable of surviving this land of annoying Froggies, then you are indeed worthy of entering the holy city."
The group was silent for a moment, each trying to absorb the imensity of the journey ahead. It would be difficult, but not impossible. They would succeed.
Then Vhagram spoke up again. "Of course, you could also take the second course: About a mile to the north is the highway, which is generally safe and patrolled by the Green Elfin Rangers. Take this road and you may be there in less than a day."
Vhagram went broody again. "The choice is yours, adventurers. Choose wisely..."
His echoing voice rang in the air as his dark form vanished into the air.
Vhagram nodded his head. "So, all of you are coming. Excellent."
He turned to leave, but quickly stopped. In a voice eerie and hollow, he spoke. "But be warned. To journey to the Holy City, you must take one of two courses... "
The wind blew threw the dead trees of the woods, its frightening whisper rustling the leaves.
"The first be long and treacherous... you must travel a hundred thousand paces to the south, whereupon you will come upon a dreadful bog, the smell whereupon would kill many normal men. Within this bog is the vile sorcerer, Hackenades, who will shoot you with deadly lightningbolts for no good reason.
"If you be strong, or lucky enough to pass this evil bog, beyond it lies a fearsome desert, from which the bleached bones of those foolish enough to enter it are found. This vast sand pile stretches for many leagues, but cross it you must.
"After surviving this harrowing desert, you will come upon the dominion of the Harpy Queen. Be not fooled, for this queen be a man! Yes, a man this queen be, so be not be fooled by she!
"Beyond the Harpy Qeen's lands lie the Horrible Hordes of Hordak. Here you must fight through a gauntlet of the Barbarian King's mightiest warriors. If you manage to defeat them, you will face Hordak himself. The victor of this epic fight shall be crowned King of the Horde, and shall forever live in history as King of the Horde.
"The last trial lies past the Horde, in the dreaded Land of the Frogs. This beautiful nation was once besieged by evil fascists, yet through the help of many nations the inhabitants of this land, the Prissy Frogs, were freed of their oppressors. Yet after their liberation, the Frogs became rude and snotty and generally not very nice to be around. They wear berrets and smoke and drink, and look their noses down upon all other nations of the world. They even swindle visitors to their nation, many of whom are members of the kingdoms who saved these Frogs, and treat them very rudely. If you humans are capable of surviving this land of annoying Froggies, then you are indeed worthy of entering the holy city."
The group was silent for a moment, each trying to absorb the imensity of the journey ahead. It would be difficult, but not impossible. They would succeed.
Then Vhagram spoke up again. "Of course, you could also take the second course: About a mile to the north is the highway, which is generally safe and patrolled by the Green Elfin Rangers. Take this road and you may be there in less than a day."
Vhagram went broody again. "The choice is yours, adventurers. Choose wisely..."
His echoing voice rang in the air as his dark form vanished into the air.
The_high_king
Literotica Guru
- Joined
- Aug 1, 2001
- Posts
- 1,846
Creeps
"I guess we could flip a coin". I took out a copper piece, "heads will mean the simple road, and tails will be the bog, and the other crap that comes after that". I prepare to flip the coin.
"I guess we could flip a coin". I took out a copper piece, "heads will mean the simple road, and tails will be the bog, and the other crap that comes after that". I prepare to flip the coin.
Isolde
Guardian's Desire
- Joined
- Dec 27, 2000
- Posts
- 4,432
Isolde sighed and shook her head. What happened to people sending carriages for their guests?
"Hordak is a familiar name because he happens to be our little brother. Remember, he never came home for dinner that night and none of his friends came back who went to look for them. At first we thought it simply the fact that barbarians were made for fighting, not rescue attempts but it looks as if they all joined brother dear on some silly adventure and now they think they have attitude enough to tangle with anyone that comes their way."
Her eyes gaining a fire that Thorr knew too well, she said,"Hordak I will take care of later, trust me. He is going to pay for worrying mother all these years not to mention he needs to be knocked down a peg or two it seems. Meanwhile, Cherise, I do believe we will take that transportation spell as it will make things easier."
To the messanger she said,"We shall be there shortly. Thank the princess for us and tell her we accept."
Then to Kitsuke,"I am assuming that this is okay with you, husband? I need to talk to Mergal for a few anyway. He may be the key to my next plan."
"Hordak is a familiar name because he happens to be our little brother. Remember, he never came home for dinner that night and none of his friends came back who went to look for them. At first we thought it simply the fact that barbarians were made for fighting, not rescue attempts but it looks as if they all joined brother dear on some silly adventure and now they think they have attitude enough to tangle with anyone that comes their way."
Her eyes gaining a fire that Thorr knew too well, she said,"Hordak I will take care of later, trust me. He is going to pay for worrying mother all these years not to mention he needs to be knocked down a peg or two it seems. Meanwhile, Cherise, I do believe we will take that transportation spell as it will make things easier."
To the messanger she said,"We shall be there shortly. Thank the princess for us and tell her we accept."
Then to Kitsuke,"I am assuming that this is okay with you, husband? I need to talk to Mergal for a few anyway. He may be the key to my next plan."
Isolde
Guardian's Desire
- Joined
- Dec 27, 2000
- Posts
- 4,432
Isolde looked over at Charlene and made a pffttt sound.
"Dont worry about my little brother. I will have no problem defeating him. One good thunk and he will disband his group and I will drag him to mother to apologize."
She nodded her head as if to confirm what she said,"That little twit's days are numbered. As for his hoarde all I have to do is stand Thorr up there and have him yell that there is fee ale and they will follow him like puppy dogs on a leash. Trust me, I know how to deal with my tribesmen."
Then to Cherise,"Any time you are ready. Lets get this show on the road."
"Dont worry about my little brother. I will have no problem defeating him. One good thunk and he will disband his group and I will drag him to mother to apologize."
She nodded her head as if to confirm what she said,"That little twit's days are numbered. As for his hoarde all I have to do is stand Thorr up there and have him yell that there is fee ale and they will follow him like puppy dogs on a leash. Trust me, I know how to deal with my tribesmen."
Then to Cherise,"Any time you are ready. Lets get this show on the road."
Mergale
"You truly are a disappointment," said a seductive-sounding female voice.
Mergale snarled as he turned around, his red eyes glowing fiercely. His evil sight beheld a young woman of imaculately cruel beauty. Her long white hair and pale face were delicate, yet dangerous. Her curvy form was wrapped in a silky black dress, causing all the dark males, as well as some of the ones form the bride's side, to drool. In her hand was a long black staff made of icified evil, constructed in the days of yore, when Gods walked the earth.
"Mother?!" shouted Mergale. "How the fuck did you get out?!"
The woman frowned and looked deeply hurt. "Oh my dear little child... is that anyway to speak to your mother?"
"Shut up!" The former Dark Lord strode up to the tall woman, who was now smiling evilly. "Answer my question, witch!"
One of the priests gasped. "She is his mother? You mean...?!!"
"Yes," muttered one of the Paladins. "She must be the Queen of Night."
A shudder went throughout the room.
"Mom!" shouted the Princess, who had just entered the vast chamber. "I am so glad you could come!"
The two women laughed whilst hugging each other, seemingly best friends.
Mergale's evil eyes flashed even brighter. "You mean YOU are responsible for this?!!"
The Princess nodded. "Sure. I found her in that grungy old Dark Tower of yours, sealed in demonic ice. When I found out who she was, I had to release her!"
"Why?!" shouted the Dark Lord. "I sealed her in there myself! She is the fucking QUEEN OF NIGHT! The Superem Chosen of the Void! The one destined to bring Darkness to the world!!!"
"Until you sealed me, that is," growled the Queen. "You wanted my position, so you sealed me in that cold, barren ice for over two hundred years! Your own mother!"
Mergale chuckled. "Oh, please. Don't play the guilt trip on me, woman. You yourself got that position by sealing your father in ice as well. How is grampa nowadays, anyway?"
The Queen shrugged. "Who cares? The point is, that every second of my imprisonment, I had fantasized about the numerous demented ways I could get even with you... I had dreamt up an infinite number of torments to visit upon you when I escaped. Each moment in that prison of ice I had imagined your demise." She then smiled and looked upon the Princess with teary eyes. "Who would have known that fate would have granted a punishment even more horrible than any I had concieved? My girl... you are perfect!"
The Princess giggled. "Well, I'm glad you approve of me!"
"Idiot!" shouted Mergale. "Don't you even know when you're being insulted!"
The Queen laughed and took the Princess's hands. "Come, daughter! Let us speak of things in private! I can't wait to hear what you have planned for the future!"
The two women giggled and walked away, leaving a raging Mergale behind.
"This is so screwed up!" He growled to himself. "She must be nuts inviting my mother! Who the fuck else is gonna show up?"
"You truly are a disappointment," said a seductive-sounding female voice.
Mergale snarled as he turned around, his red eyes glowing fiercely. His evil sight beheld a young woman of imaculately cruel beauty. Her long white hair and pale face were delicate, yet dangerous. Her curvy form was wrapped in a silky black dress, causing all the dark males, as well as some of the ones form the bride's side, to drool. In her hand was a long black staff made of icified evil, constructed in the days of yore, when Gods walked the earth.
"Mother?!" shouted Mergale. "How the fuck did you get out?!"
The woman frowned and looked deeply hurt. "Oh my dear little child... is that anyway to speak to your mother?"
"Shut up!" The former Dark Lord strode up to the tall woman, who was now smiling evilly. "Answer my question, witch!"
One of the priests gasped. "She is his mother? You mean...?!!"
"Yes," muttered one of the Paladins. "She must be the Queen of Night."
A shudder went throughout the room.
"Mom!" shouted the Princess, who had just entered the vast chamber. "I am so glad you could come!"
The two women laughed whilst hugging each other, seemingly best friends.
Mergale's evil eyes flashed even brighter. "You mean YOU are responsible for this?!!"
The Princess nodded. "Sure. I found her in that grungy old Dark Tower of yours, sealed in demonic ice. When I found out who she was, I had to release her!"
"Why?!" shouted the Dark Lord. "I sealed her in there myself! She is the fucking QUEEN OF NIGHT! The Superem Chosen of the Void! The one destined to bring Darkness to the world!!!"
"Until you sealed me, that is," growled the Queen. "You wanted my position, so you sealed me in that cold, barren ice for over two hundred years! Your own mother!"
Mergale chuckled. "Oh, please. Don't play the guilt trip on me, woman. You yourself got that position by sealing your father in ice as well. How is grampa nowadays, anyway?"
The Queen shrugged. "Who cares? The point is, that every second of my imprisonment, I had fantasized about the numerous demented ways I could get even with you... I had dreamt up an infinite number of torments to visit upon you when I escaped. Each moment in that prison of ice I had imagined your demise." She then smiled and looked upon the Princess with teary eyes. "Who would have known that fate would have granted a punishment even more horrible than any I had concieved? My girl... you are perfect!"
The Princess giggled. "Well, I'm glad you approve of me!"
"Idiot!" shouted Mergale. "Don't you even know when you're being insulted!"
The Queen laughed and took the Princess's hands. "Come, daughter! Let us speak of things in private! I can't wait to hear what you have planned for the future!"
The two women giggled and walked away, leaving a raging Mergale behind.
"This is so screwed up!" He growled to himself. "She must be nuts inviting my mother! Who the fuck else is gonna show up?"
The_high_king
Literotica Guru
- Joined
- Aug 1, 2001
- Posts
- 1,846
Creeps
"Ready when you are Cherise". I waited for the upcoming teleportation spell.
"Ready when you are Cherise". I waited for the upcoming teleportation spell.
kitsuke
Literotica Guru
- Joined
- Aug 10, 2001
- Posts
- 905
"Of course, Isolde-chan, I would be honored to attend you frineds wedding. I am afraid all that I would have to give as a present would be a haunch of venison, though." Kitsuke held up a leg of the deer for emphasis. "Er... do you mean now?"
Neale
Old school bastich
- Joined
- Jan 4, 2001
- Posts
- 1,921
Thorr
"Thorr ready for party! We go now, drink ale, ravish bridesmaids!" At a stern look from Isolde, Thorr abruptly remembered that he was a married man now, his ravishing days gone for good. "Uh, be nice to nice bridesmaids, Thorr mean!"
"Thorr ready for party! We go now, drink ale, ravish bridesmaids!" At a stern look from Isolde, Thorr abruptly remembered that he was a married man now, his ravishing days gone for good. "Uh, be nice to nice bridesmaids, Thorr mean!"
