The Insult Thread

[Olderwiserstillhorny]

If you have a dick, spit it out, it belongs to someone else.

 

[sirhugs]

If you have a dick, spit it out, it belongs to someone else.

if it was your dick, I'd want to spit it out...

 

[yowser]

If I wrote as well as you, I'd be contemplating suicide.

 

[TheLobster]

If I wrote as well as you, I'd be contemplating suicide.

And rightfully so, because that'd be your absolute, momentary peak, and you would only go downhill from there.

 

[SimonDoom]

if it was your dick, I'd want to spit it out...

If it was his dick, it would be so small you wouldn't notice it was there.

 

[Kelliezgirl]

If it was his dick, it would be so small you wouldn't notice it was there.

Just an odd, shitty, taste in your mouth.

 

[Kelliezgirl]

Somewhere a tree is working hard to generate the oxygen you're breathing.
You owe that tree an apology.

 

[SimonDoom]

Somewhere a tree is working hard to generate the oxygen you're breathing.
You owe that tree an apology.

Either that, or somebody should just chop the damn tree down.

 

[Olderwiserstillhorny]

Your mother have any kids that lived?

 

[Bamagan]

May you find yourself a host to pubic lice and fall in love with the sensation of having them.

 

[sirhugs]

May you find yourself a host to pubic lice and fall in love with the sensation of having them.

may your lice make love to your mother's

 

[StillStunned]

I realise that you're only pretending to be this stupid, but perhaps you should tone it down a bit. It's gone from amusing to downright implausible now.

 

[anthrodisiac]

I realise that you're only pretending to be this stupid, but perhaps you should tone it down a bit. It's gone from amusing to downright implausible now.

I dunno, it seems pretty plausible from where I'm standing.

 

[nightwhisperer]

This is so funny, I was thinking of doing a similar thing but I thought it'd get shut down pretty quick. Just redirect bickerers here so other people can actually use threads with some enjoyment instead of wade through piles of horseshit.

This forces me to break my never-post rule, which I have now done twice today, in part because of things you've said. Please don't be offended, because I do not mean this to offend. "Just redirect bickerers here so other people can actually use threads with some enjoyment instead of wading through piles of horseshit," coming from a person whose commenting history, as far as I've seen it, I think indicates a near-pathological inability not to bicker or at least pontificate, and is hysterically funny.

 

[anthrodisiac]

This forces me to break my never-post rule, which I have now done twice today, in part because of things you've said. Please don't be offended, because I do not mean this to offend. "Just redirect bickerers here so other people can actually use threads with some enjoyment instead of wading through piles of horseshit," coming from a person whose commenting history, as far as I've seen it, I think indicates a near-pathological inability not to bicker or at least pontificate, and is hysterically funny.

Yep, that's me, constant bickerer and Pontificacious Pilot!

Also, I don't really think that describes me very well. For instance, I'd never half-ass pathologizing. I take great pride in my pathologizing, so you can drop that "near" nonsense; I just have a straight-up pathological inability not to picker and/or pontificate. Oh, and I can both pathologically bicker and pathologically pontificate at the same time — pathologically! In fact, I spent decades learning the secrets of simultaneous bickerage and pathologizology under the tutelage of great and wise patholog-bicker monks. Look, see? They even gave me a little certificate that says: "Anthy, for the love of God, please leave."

Or... it might be a restraining order. Ohhhhhh. Hmm.

 

[StillStunned]

coming from a person whose commenting history, as far as I've seen it, I think indicates a near-pathological inability not to bicker or at least pontificate,

What?! You must be thinking of someone else. @anthrodisiac is one of the most positive, supportive and thoughtful posters we've had in a long time.

 

[anthrodisiac]

What?! You must be thinking of someone else. @anthrodisiac is one of the most positive, supportive and thoughtful batshit insane posters we've had in a long time.

Fixed it for you!

 

[StillStunned]

Fixed it for you!

The one doesn't preclude the other. As in, "You don't have to be batshit insane to be a positive, supportive and thoughtful poster here, but it helps!"

 

[anthrodisiac]

The one doesn't preclude the other. As in, "You don't have to be batshit insane to be a positive, supportive and thoughtful poster here, but it helps!"

Yeah, but I feel like the inclusion of the other superlatives dilutes the impact of the batshit insanity. Like, if I'm going to be known for one thing, it should be the thing I'm best at, namely, batshit insanity

Or pontificating. I'll have to get back to you on that. It's kind of a toss-up at this point. Well, I'd say it's rated Lean Batshit Insanity, but it's not a very strong lean, maybe a couple points? The prediction markets are going crazy on this one, lemme tell ya.

 

[Britva415]

You know people who don't know nothin'? Then there's those who don't even suspect nothin'.

 

[spiralholly]

They say an artist is never known in their lifetime. So, let me just say, I look forward to hearing of your death. It will be a good death, I'm sure. Very... successful. And if someone should approach me and say, 'oh, did you know them; were you a fan?' I can honestly reply, 'Just of their last work. I found it emotionally satisfying. Gratifying, really.'

 

[Zootonius]

One I like, falsely attributed to Churchill

If you were my husband, I'd poison your tea.

Madam, if you were my wife I'd drink it.

 

[Djmac1031]

There are some folks in this forum so stupid that all I have to do to keep them in suspense is

 

[BeechLeaf]

*rolls eyes* Some people are such bad writers they can't even notice when they didn't finish a

 

[anthrodisiac]

There are some folks in this forum so stupid that all I have to do to keep them in suspense is

IS WHAT????????