"We're not a chat room...."

[~Dream~]

I personally promise to..

SCREAM!! IF ALL THIS "SERIOUSNESS DOES NOT CEASE..

I come here to be educated,have "fun",and help others,if NOONE else cares to do that..it's YOUR loss..

*Cant we all just get along? " PLEEEEZZZZZE???

 

[DRxBlue]

Ooo..Ooo...That's the Mad Scientist's Favorite LINE!

Then i mess up my hair and i say...

MmmmwwooooaahahahahAHAHAAAAH! Go AHEAD and scream little girl! Nobody can HEAR you!!! ...uhh it's the Internet, eh? Text only...


mmmmwwoooaha ha haa...

It always sounds scarier on TV...

Mad Blue

 

[~Dream~]

eek!! it's the mad scientist Dr.Blue!!

Oh my goodness! What ever is a poor 'inocent" little Dream to do'? Master? I believe I may have got myself into a jam with the EVIL,lurking Dr.Blue lol
My screams may Not be heard tis true..
but just you wait for MY WORDS dear Dr. Blue!!

 

[Persephone36]

Might I suggest then, that the solution to our troubles is for everyone concerned to take steps to try to enhance the level of friendship here?

James, I hope you don't mind if I add to your thought here and take it further.

I don't think it's necessary that we all be friends. We don't have to like each other. But common courtesy and respect is demanded. We're all human -- we're all bound by that. You want to actively dislike someone here -- then take it off the board. Life's too short to either rip things to shreds because you don't like it but aren't capable of positively contributing to, play the troll or use the balance of your time on here to gripe -- in general or at each other. But then again -- if you have nothing better to do with yourself -- then who am I to judge, lol?

And of course -- I'm whistling in the wind. Because the people -- ALL the people who need to sit back and think about what I'm saying -- are simply going to go on the defensive. Can anyone rise to that challenge -- to poke your head above the fray -- be the best version of yourself -- and leave your ego at the door?

There are no "rights" in life -- only opinion and points of view. We're all biased. No reason not to treat each other with respect though.

I personally think Zip's suggestions here were incredibly well-thought out, calm, and probably some of the only intelligent positive contribution that's been on. Really Zip -- you should block it, take it out of here -- and start a new thread with your thoughts. They're lost here.

I won't, for my own reasons, be opening up this thread again. If you have a problem with me -- then PM me.

And that's my last -- admittedly grumpy -- two cents.

Y'all waste your time anyway you like.

Perse

 

[Lancecastor]

Perse, adding to the thoughts of JamesBlandings....

I don't think it's necessary that we all be friends.

We don't have to like each other.

And of course -- I'm whistling in the wind.

Because the people -- ALL the people who need to sit back and think about what I'm saying -- are simply going to go on the defensive.

There are no "rights" in life -- only opinion and points of view.

Really Zip -- you should block it, take it out of here -- and start a new thread with your thoughts. They're lost here.

I won't, for my own reasons, be opening up this thread again. If you have a problem with me -- then PM me.

Y'all waste your time anyway you like.

Perse

....I'm pretty sure, Perse, that what you said was in no way related to what James said.

 

[James Blandings]

Re: Perse, adding to the thoughts of JamesBlandings....

....I'm pretty sure, Perse, that what you said was in no way related to what James said.

I believe it is related. I don't think we will ever all be friends here, nor do I believe that we need be. What I meant to convey was a hope that each of us would approach posting here in an overall spirit of friendliness, and that we be open to gestures of friendship when they are offered.

 

[Sandia]

Re: Re: Re: Re: Re: Re: Re: Re: cym

No Lance, I certainly do not know that.
You have a choice in how you view things. I could take your post as an attempt to respark the flame war, but I choose to regard it an a well meaning attempt to explain your position.
Similarly, you choose, in my opinion, to see offense where none was meant, and unfriendliness where none is present.
And as with Sandia, I feel that you are shorting yourself, much more than you are others, by how you view the forum.

Caroline, respectfully, that's just wrong. You don't see it, because it hasn't happened to you. If it had happened to you, you'd know exactly what I'm talking about.

I wanna be careful here, because I'm not saying that you - or anyone - is obligated to talk to me or to like me - or anyone else for that matter. I don't believe that.

But I do think the sticky is disingenuous.

I also think y'all needed a wake-up call if you thought you could keep people out by trashing them. I hope Lance, at least, has provided an example for that.

 

[James Blandings]

Re: Re: Re: Re: Re: Re: Re: Re: Re: cym

Caroline, respectfully, that's just wrong. You don't see it, because it hasn't happened to you. If it had happened to you, you'd know exactly what I'm talking about.

I wanna be careful here, because I'm not saying that you - or anyone - is obligated to talk to me or to like me - or anyone else for that matter. I don't believe that.

But I do think the sticky is disingenuous.

I also think y'all needed a wake-up call if you thought you could keep people out by trashing them. I hope Lance, at least, has provided an example for that.

No one is trying to keep anyone out of this forum. You are free to post here or not as you wish.
Your complaint about the sticky is noted.

 

[Lancecastor]

Re: Re: Re: Re: Re: Re: Re: Re: Re: Re: cym

No one is trying to keep anyone out of this forum. You are free to post here or not as you wish.
Your complaint about the sticky is noted.

James, for all the times you and Cym and Caroline have said you wouldn't post to my threads;

For all the times I've been called names and told me I wasn't welcome and should frick off to the GB;

And for all the selective friendliness you and your pals use to make their feelings known through indirect and passive means;

I say this in a gentle, supportive, caring way:

"Phhrrrnnnnnnt!"

 

[Ebonyfire]

Re: Re: Re: Re: Re: Re: Re: Re: Re: cym

Caroline, respectfully, that's just wrong. You don't see it, because it hasn't happened to you. If it had happened to you, you'd know exactly what I'm talking about.

I wanna be careful here, because I'm not saying that you - or anyone - is obligated to talk to me or to like me - or anyone else for that matter. I don't believe that.

But I do think the sticky is disingenuous.

I also think y'all needed a wake-up call if you thought you could keep people out by trashing them. I hope Lance, at least, has provided an example for that.

This is my first, and only post to this thread. And it is in total agreement with what Sandia has said. Just because one person's experience is different, it is unwise to assume that another's person's experience is not valid because it differs from yours. There is a name for that. It is discounting. And there is far too much of it around here.

Thanks Sandia for having the guts to speak you mind.

I am done with this.

Ebony <speak only of what you know for yourself, remember mind reading is a fake profession>

 

[Lancecastor]

"Phrrrnnnttt"

....by the way, is the lighthearted sound of a fart in your general direction, James.

Thank you for noting our collective views on the sticky.

If the words in that closed, locked "thread" are indeed indicative of the way you'd like this place to be, kknow that for many here, you are simply not walking the walk but are merely talking the talk.

Anyone with a modicum of intelligence will see that and react accordingly, from simply not posting, to leaving, to taking the time to point out you are being a silly small minded hypocrite.

So, note that, and either:

1. continue to do as you please...in which case, you have no right or sway to criticise others at any time.... at least not from any position of respect or authority as a leader....or

2. draft something that is more reflective of the true nature of this Forum, its ebbs and flows....and Moderate to those parameters in a clear and unambiguous way...or

3. simply strip the sticky down to the 5 Thou Shalt Nots and leave it at that....because

4. as you've said, being a Moderator here is nothing more than a word... your only official function is to skim the threads for illegal words that could get the owners in trouble.

You can take that as you see it, but it's written from a supportive standpoint with the Forum in mind.

I for one will continue to post to any thread I find interesting, regardless of who is there and what they've said...because I believe that all opinions and inputs here should have equal access, validity and receive their due.

Cheers;

Lance

 

[Ebonyfire]

Re: Re: Perse, adding to the thoughts of JamesBlandings....

I believe it is related. I don't think we will ever all be friends here, nor do I believe that we need be. What I meant to convey was a hope that each of us would approach posting here in an overall spirit of friendliness, and that we be open to gestures of friendship when they are offered.

Ok, I lied. One more post.

Don't you find that "posting in the spirit of friendliness" a rather lofty goal? Civility and good manners is at best is the most you can expect or require.

I post my opinions. I do not post to be liked or to gain/curry favor with anyone. I do not attack or belittle other people nor to I put up with those who I perceive are trying to attack or belittle me.

Friendship is my choice to extend or withhold. If others feel differently fine. But I reserve the right to be civil, instead of giving warm and fuzzy feelings to strangers. If a person finds me not to their liking, I think I can live with that.


Ebony <now I am done>

 

[Lancecastor]

Re: Re: Perse, adding to the thoughts of JamesBlandings....

I went back and re-read Perse's post, James....you were right, her thougts and yours are related.

I like to think that most everything I say here is in "the overall spirit of friendliness".

But I prefer bell-bottoms to enhance my spirit of friendliness.

I wonder what Perse's bum looks like in a pair?

Or if overalls would better suit her cheeky glutes?

So much food for thought;

Lance

I believe it is related. I don't think we will ever all be friends here, nor do I believe that we need be. What I meant to convey was a hope that each of us would approach posting here in an overall spirit of friendliness, and that we be open to gestures of friendship when they are offered.

 

[CarolineOh]

Re: Re: Re: Re: Re: Re: Re: Re: Re: cym

I choose to believe you understand what Sandia and I are saying... and have all along.

Of course I understand what you and Sandia are saying.
And I firmly believe that you are wrong.

 

[CarolineOh]

Re: Re: Re: Re: Re: Re: Re: Re: Re: cym

Caroline, respectfully, that's just wrong. You don't see it, because it hasn't happened to you. If it had happened to you, you'd know exactly what I'm talking about.

I wanna be careful here, because I'm not saying that you - or anyone - is obligated to talk to me or to like me - or anyone else for that matter. I don't believe that.

But I do think the sticky is disingenuous.

I also think y'all needed a wake-up call if you thought you could keep people out by trashing them. I hope Lance, at least, has provided an example for that.

Excuse me? Are you unaware that I have been called a bitch, a moron, have had my relationship with Sam sneered at, and have been told that I have a mental disorder, seen my name pop up as some sort of punch line in unrelated threads, and have endured previously unknown posters popping up to laugh at remarks made at my expense?
Your remark that it "hasn't happened" to me is without merit.
As is your implication that I am party to any attempt to keep any one from posting here.
Nonetheless, I still believe that if you look at the board as a whole, and not a few selected individual threads, you will see a place where the business of learning , teaching and sharing is in full swing, to the benefit of anyone who wishs to partake of it.

 

[Lancecastor]

Re: Re: Re: Re: Re: Re: Re: Re: Re: Re: cym

Your remark that it "hasn't happened" to me is without merit.
As is your implication that I am party to any attempt to keep any one from posting here.

Keeping people from posting here has been your stock-in-trade when you're not baking chocolate starfish brown-nose brownies for those who say what you want to hear, darling.

Whatever happened, for example, to that woman newbie whose view it was that this BDSM Forum was a "big fantasy" ?

Shall we go have a look at how all you kind sharing gals, welcome-wagon sunshine beaming out of your butts, going about the business of "educating" people.... treated her?

Wake up and smell the PrepH, babe.

That's why it happens to you, by the way....another mystery solved!

Do not adjust your halo; difficulties originate on the Network.

You're funny;

Lance

 

[CarolineOh]

Thank god all the poor persecuted people have big strong Lance to be their protector and defender from evil people like me.

 

[Lancecastor]

Hey.....

I have been called a bitch, (That's Queen Bitch, babycakes.)

a moron, (yep)

have had my relationship with Sam sneered at, (giggles and pre-broom-jump jibes about what happens after the ceremony more than sneers, I think)


and have been told that I have a mental disorder, (HUH?)

seen my name pop up as some sort of punch line in unrelated threads, (you make a great punchline! just wind her up and watch her sputter!)

and have endured previously unknown posters popping up to laugh at remarks made at my expense?(Oh the shame, the embarassment of UNKNOWN posters becoming KNOWN at my expense! And laughing! At ME! The pain of it!)

...I didn't know you had a mental disorder!


But it makes sense, now that you mention it....

Lance "Concerned For Your Emotional Stability" Castor

 

[Lancecastor]

You're not evil, Caroline....

Thank god all the poor persecuted people have big strong Lance to be their protector and defender from evil people like me.

...you're mostly just self-absorbed, defensive, slightly dense and highly argumentative, that's all.

Lance "Counting The Daze" Castor

PS: I have to go now, but I'll be back later tonite to read your love notes...I thought you weren't posting to my threads anymore, but hey, fill your boots and shake that latex-wrapped bootay my way...you're always good for a giggle, Cupcake. *hugs* Lance

 

[CarolineOh]

Re: Hey.....

...I didn't know you had a mental disorder!


But it makes sense, now that you mention it....

Lance "Concerned For Your Emotional Stability" Castor

It is ironic that you are so obsessed with what everyone else says on this board when you are completely incapable of accepting any responsibility for your own words.

 

[KillerMuffin]

Actually, Caroline, in this instance Sandia is correct. You've never felt it. The moderators have never discriminated against you for something you've posted or said. I would hazard to guess that you feel perfectly free to post whatever you like in this forum without the slightest concern that the moderators might delete, edit, or otherwise remove what you've said. Not all of us feel that free about posting.

James, it's a little disheartening to see you address this problem--and it is a legitimate problem--with "Might I suggest then, that the solution to our troubles is for everyone concerned to take steps to try to enhance the level of friendship here?"

Step back for a moment and look at the complaints levied against you. Really look at what Sandia is saying. Lance is one thing, the man is an egomaniac with an agenda. Sandia is quite another. His motives are quite obviously to air his feelings, not to cause dissension or stage a coup. It would behoove you to listen to him. It would be more in order for you and the rest of the moderators to get together and discuss why he feels this way. This is not an autocracy.

The moderators, whether they wanted to or not, have established a position of leadership here. They did so by explicit and implicit statements about how unique this forum is and how they'll protect it. They did so by expressing an opinion and signing it BDSM forum moderator. They did so through the mother thread. But mostly, the moderators have established a position of leadership by developing a vision for the forum and enacting it. They established a position of leadership and like or not, that will color them for their duration as moderators. The moderator position has no inherent weight. I am a moderator at the ORP and everyone treats me the same as a regular. Why? The ORP mods have established no position of leadership. I am a moderator at the SDC, but I am not a regular poster. I have established a position of leadership.

You may not like it, but you're not regular posters here. I think that even if you resigned the moderator position you'd still not be just a regular poster. You've established yourself as forum leaders. Because you've done that you will always have dissenters and people like Lance who challenge your authority. You will also have people who have grievances that need to be addressed.

Perhaps it might be wise for the three of you to get together and decide some sort of protocol for dealing with grievances in order to keep this forum running smoothly. You're good people and there's no reason why good and reasonable people cannot come together to solve problems for the benefit of the forum. DramaKings notwithstanding.

Does this make any sense?

 

[CarolineOh]

Re: You're not evil, Caroline....

...you're mostly just self-absorbed, defensive, slightly dense and highly argumentative, that's all.

Lance "Counting The Daze" Castor

PS: I have to go now, but I'll be back later tonite to read your love notes...I thought you weren't posting to my threads anymore, but hey, fill your boots and shake that latex-wrapped bootay my way...you're always good for a giggle, Cupcake. *hugs* Lance

Your absurd mischaracterization bears no resembalnce either to the reality of my life, nor to the impression I believe I have made with the overwhelming majority of posters in this forum. It merely speaks to the smallness and bitterness within your own heart.

 

[CarolineOh]

Actually, Caroline, in this instance Sandia is correct. You've never felt it. The moderators have never discriminated against you for something you've posted or said. I would hazard to guess that you feel perfectly free to post whatever you like in this forum without the slightest concern that the moderators might delete, edit, or otherwise remove what you've said. Not all of us feel that free about posting.

Your point is well taken. I do not know what it feels like to be "discriminated against" by the moderators.

 

[Rubyfruit]

Does anybody but me feel that one of the reasons that the GB runs so well is that it's unmoderated?

 

[Sandia]

Does anybody but me feel that one of the reasons that the GB runs so well is that it's unmoderated?

Heh heh heh. Oh, Ruby, I love you honey.

Btw, Laurel turned down my app. to moderate the GB.

I was gonna moderate the fuck out of it.