Why wont he call back?

[rachlou]

Just my thoughts here (meaningless tho they probably are), but you said you spent two weeks talking to him before you shagged him. Two weeks isn't all that long really. Maybe next time spend longer talking / flirting etc before you give it up? That way, the guy has invested far more in you emotionally and therefore is less likely to bugger off post fuckfest. I'm not trying to be harsh, but sometimes it is better to wait. Play harder to get if you like. If you make it too easy for them, they have less respect for you.

That said, I never take my own advice.

 

[rgraham666]

I'll always respect you in the morning, rach.

 

[rachlou]

I'll always respect you in the morning, rach.

But will you make me a cuppa tea too??

 

[drksideofthemoon]

There's threads about any number of subjects here. Does this mean everyone starting a thread and taking part in the discussion happening in it is obsessed?

Like I said, I know he used me. I wasn't looking in a long term relationship, I fully intended for his to use me for sex and discard me when he got enough, if I didn't discard him first.

I'm not mad he left, I'm frustrated I couldn't get more sex. This is what the post is about; why won't these people stick around long enough to actually get some sex out of their conquests before moving on? It sounds like such a big waste to me, I don't see the point of spending weeks seducing someone if it's not for the sex.

For this type of person, the thrill of the chase, the initial seduction is what motivates them. It has little to do with the actual sex, which they actually may find boring.

 

[Boxlicker101]

But will you make me a cuppa tea too??

I would even make breakfast for you.

I hope you lke cornflakes.

 

[rgraham666]

But will you make me a cuppa tea too??

Of course. English Breakfast?

 

[Liar]

Have you ever spent two weeks flirting daily with someone, finally had sex, said you'd call back and then go AWOL for two weeks?

No but I'm not Allen-esque obsessive neurotic. If he is, this is pretty normal behaviour.

...which on the other hand is a clear sign to stay the hell away.

 

[sr71plt]

Maybe it's just me, but the whole scenario and hashing it out on an Internet discussion board, Lalah, gives off vibes of obsession and compulsion to me and some sort of intentional, accelerated schedule. If I was getting the same vibes in real life in this guy's place, I would probably be inclined to cut and run at whatever point the vibes "got to me." If I was interested in more than a one-night-stand relationship, I wouldn't have it on a two-week interval schedule and I wouldn't want it to be with someone who hashed out that relationship on an Internet chat board. Maybe he's just a combination of an old-fashioned guy and one who likes to put notches on his headboard and move on.

Calling him will probably likely bring it to a head--one way or the other (most likely the other)--but maybe it would at least put a bullet in your angst and wondering.

 

[rachlou]

Of course. English Breakfast?

Absolutely!

I would even make breakfast for you.

I hope you lke cornflakes.

A girl could get used to being spoilt like this!

's for you both

 

[Boxlicker101]

Absolutely!

A girl could get used to being spoilt like this!

's for you both

's received and returned.

 

[Trinique_Fire]

Spoiler: Brutal

I met a nice guy and we were really getting along very well, we spent some time calling each others chatting on the phone hitting it off. We next went out a couple of times, and then finally had sex. It seemed like we both of us had a good time but then I never heard from him again.

I know; not a new story. I understand he probably just wanted to use me for sex, but first time sex is just a warm up as we get to know each others sexually, I haven't started gotten kinky yet. If you're going to use me at least stick around long enough for the full package before running off.

Now some of you may say he may be in a relationship, but if he managed to find the time and means to have multiple phone conversations and a couple of dates, he should be able to find time for some more sex if he wanted.

I'm so pissed off.

What did you really expect? In my honest opinion and EXPERIENCE (and I really don't give a shit what the guys here think), this is what happens. The average guy doesn't give a shit about kink. Sometimes they just want a piece of ass and then you can be along your way. The dates were his way of faking a deeper interest in you. Then he fucked you and you never heard from him again.

Sorry to be so blunt, but in my opinion, it's not much different from the situation that got me pregnant (with slight differences).

Count your blessings child, and move along with life. It's what we all have to do. Save your tears for someone who means more than a piss ant blip on your radar.

 

[August_Bouvier]

Was it even discussed beforehand that you wanted him as a benefriend? In addition to the other possible reasons, he might be pursuing someone else who's just come onto the scene. Or he's involved and didn't tell you.

 

[Lalah]

Maybe it's just me, but the whole scenario and hashing it out on an Internet discussion board, Lalah, gives off vibes of obsession and compulsion to me and some sort of intentional, accelerated schedule. If I was getting the same vibes in real life in this guy's place, I would probably be inclined to cut and run at whatever point the vibes "got to me." If I was interested in more than a one-night-stand relationship, I wouldn't have it on a two-week interval schedule and I wouldn't want it to be with someone who hashed out that relationship on an Internet chat board. Maybe he's just a combination of an old-fashioned guy and one who likes to put notches on his headboard and move on.

Calling him will probably likely bring it to a head--one way or the other (most likely the other)--but maybe it would at least put a bullet in your angst and wondering.

I admit; I'm obsessed about sex, I'm a complete slut. But I'm much more honest and plain in my words here than in real life where I can play "the game" too.

The problem with taking the chase and flirting to a longer timetable is exactly that it will augment his emotional attachment, which is not something good when all you're looking for is a fuck buddy.

Was it even discussed beforehand that you wanted him as a benefriend? In addition to the other possible reasons, he might be pursuing someone else who's just come onto the scene. Or he's involved and didn't tell you.

Honestly no it wasn't, but our flirting and innuendo had gotten so steamy I can't see how anyone could think it was about anything but sex. It's basically all our discussions were about. I suppose next time I'll have to come out and propose a fuck buddy relationship. What has the world come to?

 

[August_Bouvier]

Don't leave room for assumptions. He may have thought you were cool with a one time session. Or he might wondered if you would want more than a NSA deal.

Talk about it upfront. It can be sexy. If he's on board he won't mind at all. And who said you can't extend the chase and be fuck buddies. A great chase makes for an exciting victory.

 

[sr71plt]

I admit; I'm obsessed about sex, I'm a complete slut. But I'm much more honest and plain in my words here than in real life where I can play "the game" too.

The problem with taking the chase and flirting to a longer timetable is exactly that it will augment his emotional attachment, which is not something good when all you're looking for is a fuck buddy.

It increasingly looks like all he wanted was the sex too and he got all of that he wanted from you and was finished before you were. (How unusual is it that the man is finished before the woman? What a surprise.)

Usually the pond you decide to fish in and the bait you decide to use determine the kind of fish that will take the bait (and/or slip the hook).