Women of Lit: A Safe Place To Share

[KatieDoes]

I am going to share that I write lesbian erotica and I think I do it well. I have no objection to men enjoying or commenting on my stories, but with the exception of one woman, the only people who have written feedback were men who wanted sex with me. When I've gotten a message on the bulletin board, the same. I wish they could figure out that I'm not here for them.

They can’t see the world through any lens which does not place them at the center.

Anyhoo. I’m going to go peruse your lesbian erotica. Respectfully, of course.

 

[forgotmyantidepressants]

I am going to share that I write lesbian erotica and I think I do it well. I have no objection to men enjoying or commenting on my stories, but with the exception of one woman, the only people who have written feedback were men who wanted sex with me. When I've gotten a message on the bulletin board, the same. I wish they could figure out that I'm not here for them.

As a fellow erotica writer, that's gotta suck. But I bet there are more women reading your work than you think.

Some say there's no women reading on lit (I've seen ratios as high as 90% (men) /10% (women), but my guess is that it's closer 70/30% or even 60/40%. I've gotten a few (private) messages from women who have read my stories and I suspect some of my anonymous comments are from women.

I've read stories on here since the early 00s, but I never commented. You don't have to have an account to read and I was really embarrassed by the things I was reading, so I never bothered with creating an account or commenting. I bet there are other women who are in a similar situation.

Since I started writing for Lit, I started commenting more. I once commented on a story I liked under my user name, and a male reader actually sent me a message He liked that story, too, and was wanted to talk to "a woman with similar tastes".

There are women reading here, but I think they're quiet about it because men are
... men.

Sorry for the ramble. I could go on, but I won't

 

[KatieDoes]

As a fellow erotica writer, that's gotta suck. But I bet there are more women reading your work than you think.

Some say there's no women reading on lit (I've seen ratios as high as 90% (men) /10% (women), but my guess is that it's closer 70/30% or even 60/40%. I've gotten a few (private) messages from women who have read my stories and I suspect some of my anonymous comments are from women.

I've read stories on here since the early 00s, but I never commented. You don't have to have an account to read and I was really embarrassed by the things I was reading, so I never bothered with creating an account or commenting. I bet there are other women who are in a similar situation.

Since I started writing for Lit, I started commenting more. I once commented on a story I liked under my user name, and a male reader actually sent me a message He liked that story, too, and was wanted to talk to "a woman with similar tastes".

There are women reading here, but I think they're quiet about it because men are
... men.

Sorry for the ramble. I could go on, but I won't

Most (like 75%+) of the women I’ve talked privately with on here don’t participate publicly. Or they have like 4 posts from years ago. All have said some version of when they initially signed up, the overwhelming pile of vulgar invasive messages from men made them change their status to invisible and just lurk and read. That’s partly why I’m so active and outspoken here. I show my personality and let those it appeals to approach me.

* I have stated this repeatedly on threads where dudes ask why there aren’t more women here, and they just ignore me

 

[JennyCapricorn]

* I have stated this repeatedly on threads where dudes ask why there aren’t more women here, and they just ignore me

Asking them to take responsibility for their behavior is just so mean. But yes, I’ve explained some things have have happened to me in the last 16 months or so. I’m not surprised by those numbers.

@CherryCupcake thanks for advertising your stories. I just finished your latest and it made me itch for things I don’t normally do….

 

[stickygirl]

I am going to share that I write lesbian erotica and I think I do it well. I have no objection to men enjoying or commenting on my stories, but with the exception of one woman, the only people who have written feedback were men who wanted sex with me. When I've gotten a message on the bulletin board, the same. I wish they could figure out that I'm not here for them.

You could push more readers to your stories if you create a link in your sig.

I haven't written for a year or so, having explored a particular character who spoke for me. I have no interest in fetish trans but write ones that show we're normal people looking for fun and love. A recent comment complained I'd made them cry! I'd call that a result

As for women posting at Lit, I got sent dick pics within a few minutes of signing up. I was pretty shocked but once I'd racked up a few posting numbers then they stopped. I get the occasional "So hi there. Wanna chat then PM me". It feels like the men know what they're doing and maybe don't want to have women on Lit looking over their shoulders at their dirty secrets.
It does mean that the women who stay are feisty ( looking at you Katie! ) and fun to be around.
To all the posters here - please stay!!

 

[JennyCapricorn]

Ladies, get yourself a partner who will take a break from work to melt your brain….

I’m sure I have legs here somewhere

 

[lil_jenni]

As for women posting at Lit, I got sent dick pics within a few minutes of signing up. I was pretty shocked but once I'd racked up a few posting numbers then they stopped. I get the occasional "So hi there. Wanna chat then PM me".

This was my experience as well. It's been a long time since I've received a random dick pic. Going invisible helped with that, too. I noticed a huge drop in all unsolicited PMs when I went invisible.

 

[genzsub]

This was my experience as well. It's been a long time since I've received a random dick pic. Going invisible helped with that, too. I noticed a huge drop in all unsolicited PMs when I went invisible.

I've managed to avoid too many annoying messages from guys. I put that down to being gay rather than bi. What did you mean by "going invisible"?

 

[KatieDoes]

I've managed to avoid too many annoying messages from guys. I put that down to being gay rather than bi. What did you mean by "going invisible"?

In your privacy settings, you can opt out of others being able to see when you’re online. The little green dot won’t appear, and you won’t be listed in the currently online members section.

It eliminates some of the crudest messages from men typing with their dick in their other hand, who need to say something disgusting to a woman so they can cum.

 

[KatieDoes]

In your privacy settings, you can opt out of others being able to see when you’re online. The little green dot won’t appear, and you won’t be listed in the currently online members section.

It eliminates some of the crudest messages from men typing with their dick in their other hand, who need to say something disgusting to a woman so they can cum.

She said. Invisibly

 

[genzsub]

In your privacy settings, you can opt out of others being able to see when you’re online. The little green dot won’t appear, and you won’t be listed in the currently online members section.

It eliminates some of the crudest messages from men typing with their dick in their other hand, who need to say something disgusting to a woman so they can cum.

Ahh, now I understand! Thank you!

 

[stickygirl]

Here's a screenshot of my privacy options.
Like any online site, it makes sense to check your privacy settings

 

[JennyCapricorn]

Things seem to have slowed down here. Letting the ladies know I’m doing something I’d love to discuss with other women on PM rather than share in public. (@genzsub knows what it is) so if anyone wants to hear drop me a PM.

 

[bunny4med]

Ahh, now I understand! Thank you!

You can block their Pm's too. That's what I've done to quite a few.

 

[genzsub]

You can block their Pm's too. That's what I've done to quite a few.

I haven't needed to, yet, but great to know!

 

[KatieDoes]

Things seem to have slowed down here. Letting the ladies know I’m doing something I’d love to discuss with other women on PM rather than share in public. (@genzsub knows what it is) so if anyone wants to hear drop me a PM.

I’m up for PM.

I wish there was a way to just have an entire private forum thread. I know that by the grace and dedication of ToPleaseHim they get tossed when they post here. But it skeeves me to know that anytime one of the women here opens up about something serious, there’s a passel of perverts jerking off to her trauma.

 

[dombeotch]

Things seem to have slowed down here. Letting the ladies know I’m doing something I’d love to discuss with other women on PM rather than share in public. (@genzsub knows what it is) so if anyone wants to hear drop me a PM.

Everything ok hun?

 

[MiaBabe23]

I’m up for PM.

I wish there was a way to just have an entire private forum thread. I know that by the grace and dedication of ToPleaseHim they get tossed when they post here. But it skeeves me to know that anytime one of the women here opens up about something serious, there’s a passel of perverts jerking off to her trauma.

I don’t want to be suggesting something that’s not allowed if it’s not, but what about a dm that includes everyone who wants to contribute?

 

[JennyCapricorn]

Everything ok hun?

Oh yes! All good, just humorous experience/observation from a different platform.

 

[forgotmyantidepressants]

Serious question:

How do you form/cultivate friendships with other women in your daily life? I am starving for platonic connections with people, especially other women. I just can't seem to make it happen...

 

[KatieDoes]

Serious question:

How do you form/cultivate friendships with other women in your daily life? I am starving for platonic connections with people, especially other women. I just can't seem to make it happen...

I volunteer with things in my community that I am passionate about. My thing might not be your thing, but you have a thing.

I find that volunteering prevents me from backing out at the last minute, like I might be tempted to do with a purely social group meeting. I also end up meeting people who are passionate about the same thing I am, which leads to a natural connection.

Then… get outside your comfort zone. Even if it feels awkward. Most people are looking for connection, and most people feel awkward making the first move. So if you enjoy chatting with a woman while you’re volunteering, make the first move and invite her for coffee or lunch. She might say no. She might be looking for her new bestie and feels as unsure as you do. Only one way to find out.

 

[forgotmyantidepressants]

I volunteer with things in my community that I am passionate about. My thing might not be your thing, but you have a thing.

I find that volunteering prevents me from backing out at the last minute, like I might be tempted to do with a purely social group meeting. I also end up meeting people who are passionate about the same thing I am, which leads to a natural connection.

Then… get outside your comfort zone. Even if it feels awkward. Most people are looking for connection, and most people feel awkward making the first move. So if you enjoy chatting with a woman while you’re volunteering, make the first move and invite her for coffee or lunch. She might say no. She might be looking for her new bestie and feels as unsure as you do. Only one way to find out.

Good idea. Now I just have to figure out my thing lol

I used to be very religious. I volunteered once a month at the homeless shelter in my small Midwestern city. I liked it, but the people involved with that organization were extremely religious/conservative types and I'm trying to get away from that.

 

[stickygirl]

I recently went back to a pilates class, having stopped when covid started. I'd forgotten the chit chat before the class, which means the teacher had to call order to quieten us down! People join classes for two reasons - exercise and getting out the house to meet people.
It could be art classes, walking groups, singing... I'll admit you have to be a bit brave to give it a go but you won't regret it.

 

[lil_jenni]

Friendships in general were difficult for me once I hit the teenage years. There was a lot going on, and I shut down most relationships that made me emotionally vulnerable, platonic or otherwise. I had some (a few) good friends in college, but I was always a bit standoffish when it came to any deep friendships.

These days, I have several female (and a few male) work friends, but I still have a hard time letting myself go beyond surface friendships. However, since I'm not working now, I'm missing even those more surface work friendships.

I do have one close female friend, but we are sometimes FWBs too, so that makes it a little awkward at times, at least for me. She seems good with it all. She's also almost ten years younger than me, and sometimes that's part of the disconnect. Also, she can be a bit flakey at times, but she can also be a great listener.

Anyway, that's a long way of saying I'm struggling with female friendships too. My Hubby is encouraging me to take the twins to some infant classes, but I'm worried that I'll be older than all the other parents there.

 

[stickygirl]

We moved a few months ago and I'm still finding my feet in the new place. Work is fine, and the two of us have had a busy sailing summer, but that hasn't helped make new friends locally. Not having children means I feel a bit more isolated too. I feel this class is a first step and I'll make more effort this autumn and winter. Yes, I will! I will!
Feeling lonely sucks, even though I often like to be alone.