Writing 2nd person

[JamesSD]

2nd Person

Part of me wonders if 2nd Person has gotten a bad rap in a similar way the Celebrities category has; the most common way it's done is often lacking.

I think a lot of novice authors think that using "you" will bring a sense of personalization to the story, where the reader can really put themselves in the other role. Unfortunately what you often feel is a sort of sense of detachment. "That never happened to me," or "that isn't something I'd do" are often my knee-jerk reactions to "you" stories.

I think another automatic disadvantage of You stories, at least in smut, is they limit the gender of the reader. You can be damn general, but at some point the gender of "you" is going to have to come out.

In short, I think 2nd person is the hardest to do well and the easiest to do very poorly

 

[Lilin Penn]

that's what mine was... spontaneous, not planned, and definitely not supposed to be a second person narrative.

For something spontaneous I have to tell you that was the hottest piece I read in a long time! I had to put my phone on hold as I read it.

It was an awesome read! Thanks for sharing

 

[NoJo]

A story originally was literally a history, (not necessarily a true history!) where the narrator was telling the listener(s) about something that happened, either to the narrator themsleves, or to some other, third party.

It would be strange in this situation, where you're relating a story, to tell the story in the second person, because unless the audience were suffering from some collective amnesia, one would assume that they already knew the story, if it was about them!

And that's really the crux of the problem with 2nd person. A poem, ode, or eulogy in the 2nd person maybe; but a story -- that really doesn't make any sense at all.

 

[Quiet_Cool]

It would depend on what you consider to be 2nd person. Frankly, if you intend to try to include the reader, then you run into all the problems that I need not mention again. But if the story is meant to be a letter or a confession or something of that sort, where the "you" in question is not meant to be the reader, then it is more than doable.

A good example of this is a story posted under Samandiriel. Expiation. Trying to talk to the reader and include them is nearly imposible to do effectively, but making the reader aware of another character, one that is being spoken to, can be done.

Q_C

 

[CharleyH]

A story originally was literally a history, (not necessarily a true history!) where the narrator was telling the listener(s) about something that happened, either to the narrator themsleves, or to some other, third party.

It would be strange in this situation, where you're relating a story, to tell the story in the second person, because unless the audience were suffering from some collective amnesia, one would assume that they already knew the story, if it was about them!

And that's really the crux of the problem with 2nd person. A poem, ode, or eulogy in the 2nd person maybe; but a story -- that really doesn't make any sense at all.

AHH THANK YOU, JOE! Yet it works if there is no construct of linear time? No human construct. A never ending circle beginning to end to beginning for one character who recalls and the other who does not immediately. Beautiful! Perfect. Exactly what I submitted, and am continuing to write all day . Thank you!

THANK YOU JOE! Thank you, you saved me from my apprehensions.

 

[carsonshepherd]

For something spontaneous I have to tell you that was the hottest piece I read in a long time! I had to put my phone on hold as I read it.

It was an awesome read! Thanks for sharing

thanks *blush*

It would be strange in this situation, where you're relating a story, to tell the story in the second person, because unless the audience were suffering from some collective amnesia, one would assume that they already knew the story, if it was about them!

And that's really the crux of the problem with 2nd person. A poem, ode, or eulogy in the 2nd person maybe; but a story -- that really doesn't make any sense at all.

I would agree in most cases. in the case of my little story-ette, it was in response to the statement "I want to take you for a drive in the desert."

So, I went on to tell the person a fantasy of what might happen if we went for that drive. Did it work as a 2nd person narrative? I dunno. But the person liked it so it served its purpose.

 

[impressive]

"Masturbation is the sincerest form of flattery." ~Rhys

Oh, that's priceless!

Where is this piece, carson? I'd like to read it.

 

[CharleyH]

thanks *blush*



I would agree in most cases. in the case of my little story-ette, it was in response to the statement "I want to take you for a drive in the desert."

So, I went on to tell the person a fantasy of what might happen if we went for that drive. Did it work as a 2nd person narrative? I dunno. But the person liked it so it served its purpose.

CARSON! Damn you. You are promoting a story you have not submitted yet. It is wonderful when you fix it. SO... Shuddup or post it so everyone can READ IT! I did not notice the 2nd person, you bring it round and break it up into 1st, then remind us it is 2nd. Its is a hot - HOT recount, fantasy/story. I say, refine and submit it!!! Damn you!

PS: has anyone read my sad but erotic gay story?

 

[Dar~]

I just wrote a second person story I swore I never would, because it bothered me when other people did it. But, it was written for one specific person and somehow it works. A reader on the other site I posted it said it felt like voyeurism to read it because it's that personal.

Charley, if you're interested it's on a thread here, but I can PM you the full version. If not, that's cool. I surprised myself by writing it in 2nd person and having it be readable actually...

Let me read it* pleads*

 

[carsonshepherd]

Let me read it* pleads*

it's a page back, on this thread.

 

[carsonshepherd]

Oh, that's priceless!

Where is this piece, carson? I'd like to read it.

see above post

 

[Dar~]

That was cool. You make me feel so sexified.

 

[carsonshepherd]

That was cool. You make me feel so sexified.

thank you. your baby is so cute

 

[Dar~]

thank you. your baby is so cute

Yeah *glow* he is. I am going to take him down later, I just wanted him up for a bit. It seems a little weird to have him on a porn site