🏆 Wanker of the Week Awards 🏆

[crazychemgirl]

Fisssssssh

Nominating @Mrtenant for his dedication this nonsense.

 

[Apisto42]

Congratulations to the biggest dick pic blocker

Best acceptance speech ever

Take note you wankers, I am the best nominator of wankery

Nominated for self aggrandizement instead of self flagellating like you’re supposed to for this award.

 

[StillRain]

Oh, come on!
You mean I don't get a nomination and a potential chance at this week's Biggest Dick Trophy because I congratulated him!?
How am I supposed to win this shitty esteemed competition?

(competitive much, Jett?)

Nominated for not recognising the prestige of this, the greatest award in the history of awards.

 

[StillRain]

Nominated for self aggrandizement instead of self flagellating like you’re supposed to for this award.

Nominated for big words.

 

[Desiree_Radcliffe]

I am still trying to figure out this thread. Are we nominating people who are actual wankers or are we, like, reclaiming the word wanker and using it for the better good and therefore the wanker of the week is an esteemed person? Does it make me a wanker for overthinking this?

 

[SalaciousMonkey22]

Nominated for big words.

It does my heart proud.

 

[InThe312]

I am still trying to figure out this thread. Are we nominating people who are actual wankers or are we, like, reclaiming the word wanker and using it for the better good and therefore the wanker of the week is an esteemed person? Does it make me a wanker for overthinking this?

Yes

 

[37_ttej]

I am still trying to figure out this thread. Are we nominating people who are actual wankers or are we, like, reclaiming the word wanker and using it for the better good and therefore the wanker of the week is an esteemed person? Does it make me a wanker for overthinking this?

As 312 said.

I **think** the way this works is that the worst (best?) wankers get to be the Panel of Judge (POJ) and then prove how wanky they are by wanking the wank awards each wank week.
In any case, this whole show is just one big circle jerk.
And I mean that in the nicest possible way.
There's some great wankers folk here who I'm happy to call friends.

PS: I'm think of changing my name to Willy Wanka so that I'm more eligible for nomination.

 

[Wand3rlust]

As 312 said.

I **think** the way this works is that the worst (best?) wankers get to be the Panel of Judge (POJ) and then prove how wanky they are by wanking the wank awards each wank week.
In any case, this whole show is just one big circle jerk.
And I mean that in the nicest possible way.
There's some great wankers folk here who I'm happy to call friends.

PS: I'm think of changing my name to Willy Wanka so that I'm more eligible for nomination.

You don't need to change your name.

 

[InThe312]

You don't need to change your name.

Nominated for ruining the fun.

 

[37_ttej]

Nominated for ruining the fun.

Phew.
Glad you called that out, 312.
I was literally about to press ‘save’ on the profile change.
So, maybe I won’t go with Willy Wanka.
I was thinking instead about DJ Jizzy Jett and the Fresh Prints since I seem to leave my sticky fingerprints everywhere.
Thoughts?

 

[StillRain]

I am still trying to figure out this thread. Are we nominating people who are actual wankers or are we, like, reclaiming the word wanker and using it for the better good and therefore the wanker of the week is an esteemed person? Does it make me a wanker for overthinking this?

Nominated for trying to make anything on Lit make sense.

 

[InThe312]

Phew.
Glad you called that out, 312.
I was literally about to press ‘save’ on the profile change.
So, maybe I won’t go with Willy Wanka.
I was thinking instead about DJ Jizzy Jett and the Fresh Prints since I seem to leave my sticky fingerprints everywhere.
Thoughts?

Nominated for trying a little too hard with this one.

 

[37_ttej]

Nominated for trying a little too hard with this one.

I’d nominate you for that, but can’t really argue. Fair call I say.

 

[37_ttej]

As the week of wanking draws to a close, Jett reflects on his efforts to earn nominations for the coveted Golden Cock.

• Acknowledging last week’s winner - zero nominations. Obviously this is just good form and not wankery.
• Dissing the award merit - 1 nomination. OK, so cracks about the shitty trophy earn you demerits.
• Being a snarky bitch - zero nominations. Hmm, seems that’s just par for the course around here and isn’t noteworthy.
• Trying too hard - 1 nomination. Had to go to extreme measures, which were finally recognised. It takes a lot of work though to sustain that level of idiocy.
• Being a smart arse in various threads and posts - zero nominations. Again, totes normal for this place.
• Awesome poetic talent - zero nominations. You cultural cretins.

So, on balance, a moderate achievement this week and Jett gives himself a C+ on his wanking merit scorecard.
“Shows potential, but needs to increase effort and demonstrate marked improvement in wanking if he wants to play with the big boys”.

Running out of ideas though. Perhaps next week, I could try:

• Sucking up to the POJ
• Sending random dick pics to regular nominees
• Starting an ampics photo blog on my wanking progress

 

[StillRain]

As the week of wanking draws to a close, Jett reflects on his efforts to earn nominations for the coveted Golden Cock.

• Acknowledging last week’s winner - zero nominations. Obviously this is just good form and not wankery.
• Dissing the award merit - 1 nomination. OK, so cracks about the shitty trophy earn you demerits.
• Being a snarky bitch - zero nominations. Hmm, seems that’s just par for the course around here and isn’t noteworthy.
• Trying too hard - 1 nomination. Had to go to extreme measures, which were finally recognised. It takes a lot of work though to sustain that level of idiocy.
• Being a smart arse in various threads and posts - zero nominations. Again, totes normal for this place.
• Awesome poetic talent - zero nominations. You cultural cretins.

So, on balance, a moderate achievement this week and Jett gives himself a C+ on his wanking merit scorecard.
“Shows potential, but needs to increase effort and demonstrate marked improvement in wanking if he wants to play with the big boys”.

Running out of ideas though. Perhaps next week, I could try:

• Sucking up to the POJ
• Sending random dick pics to regular nominees
• Starting an ampics photo blog on my wanking progress

Nominated for self-reflection. A tool the men on lit do not engage in.

 

[Apisto42]

Nominated for self-reflection. A tool the men on lit do not engage in.

Heh. Tool.

 

[37_ttej]

Nominated for self-reflection. A tool the men on lit do not engage in.

Pfft. I do it daily in front of my mirror. Hard not to when you’re as good looking as me.
Or as stunningly gorgeous as you, @StillRain.
(decided to start early for next week’s noms)

 

[StillRain]

Heh. Tool.

My little pocket pickle, so precious.

 

[StillRain]

Pfft. I do it daily in front of my mirror. Hard not to when you’re as good looking as me.
Or as stunningly gorgeous as you, @StillRain.
(decided to start early for next week’s noms)

Nominated for sucking up.

 

[Apisto42]

Nominated for sucking up.

Nominated for giving him what he wanted. You only should do that for 312 ya know.

Slapper.

 

[37_ttej]

Nominated for sucking up.

Yes!!!
Victory is mine, losers!

 

[StillRain]

Nominated for giving him what he wanted. You only should do that for 312 ya know.

Slapper.

Nominated for name calling.

That’s my job.

 

[Apisto42]

Nominated for name calling.

That’s my job.

Fair enough.

 

[Foggybottom81]

I'm not here to make any nominations. I'm just wondering if there's an actual trophy involved?
View attachment 2309399

Give it to me now.