An Ecclectic Collection.

[Mav Unlimited]

 

[yeishia]

Here are a couple of funny Banned Commercial



Sex & Bondage


Adam & Eve ​

 

[Last_Rider]

Please watch this, it's what happens when Scottish Shepards get bored.

http://www.wimp.com/sheeplight/

 

[yeishia]

Very amusing Rider and I had thought...

 

[yeishia]

I know we have a Joke Thread but I cannot find it and soo....

Opps!

One day a man went on a buissness trip to Florida.

He had saw this hooker and he asked "How much for a hand job?"

The hooker replied "100 Bucks"

The man said "100 Bucks, That's a lot of got damn money"

So the hooker pulled him to the side and said "See that Mercedes, I paid for that by giving hand jobs."

So he gave her the money and received the best hand he had ever had.

The next day he sees her and asks "How much for a head job?"

She said "200 dollars"

"200 dollars that's a lot of money"

She pulled him to the side and said "You see that yacht by the pier, I paid for that yacht by giving head jobs."

So he gives her the money, and get the best head job of his life

On hist last day in Florida he returns to the hooker and says "The hand job was good, the head job was great how much for the whole package."

"1000 dollars'

"1000 dollars that's a lot of god damn money"

So she pulled him to side and said "You see that island, I could afford that if I had a pussy."


​

 

[yeishia]

 

[Last_Rider]

lol, nice find

 

[yeishia]

lol, nice find

*giggles*

 

[Last_Rider]

You have an excellent ability to find humorous things my love

 

[yeishia]

Some crazy things that we crazy Brits are known for saying:

British saying - Definition in American English

1.) Completely Mental - crazy
2.) Quite nice/ "rawther" (rather) lovely - Its Good
3.) Ruck Sack - Back Pack
4.) Useless Knob - Lazy person
5.) pop over/in - go to, stop by
6.) What do you fancy? - What do you like?
7.) Gob - Mouth
8.) Ish - something not nice
9.) Scarper - to escape fast
10.) Barking - crazy
11.) cane - travel at speed
12.) Bee's Knee's - the best
13.) Elbow grease - Hard work
14.) chuffed as nuts - extremely pleased
15.) cow juice - milk
16.) Bob's your Uncle - there you have it
17.) Cackhander - Left Handed person
18.) Arse about tit - back to front
19.) Keep your hair on - calm down
20.) Absolute tosh - complete rubbish
21.) beastly - big
22.) Belt up - shut up
23.) blast - dammit
24.) cheesed off - annoyed
25.) chivvy along - hurry up
26.) codswallop - baloney
27.) donkeys years - a long time
28.) duffer - old person
29.) fiddle sticks - polite swear word
30.) full of beans - someone has a lot of energy
31.) knockers - breasts
32.) alright mush - hi
33.) nitwit - twit
34.) not my cup of tea - not for me
35.) on your bike - polit way of saying f*** off
36.) off your trolley - mad
37.) Parky - cold
38.) pear shaped - something gone wrong
39.) piece of cake - easy
40.) put a sock in it - shut up
41.) Rat arsed - drunk
42.) shirty - bad tempered
43.) shambles - chaotic mess
44.) skew-whiff - crooked
45.) Smarmy - smooth
46.) spend a penny - go to the toilet
47.) splash out - spend a lot of money
48.) stone the crows - blimey
49.) suss - figure out
50.) taking the mickey - taking the piss
51.) throw a spanner in the works - wreck something
52.) Tickety-boo - if someting is going well
53.) twee - dainty
54.) two finger salute - swear
55.) waffle - talk about something irrelevant
56.) put some welly into it - put some muscle into it
57.) zonked - tired, exhausted
58.) throw a wobbly - have a tantrum
59.) yonks - a long time
60.) whinge - complain

 

[yeishia]

Tio sent me this...

The i Pad​

 

[Annisthyrienne]

Tio sent me this...

The i Pad​

Thanks for the laugh I needed today, Yeishia!

 

[EesomeBeastie]

Tio sent me this...

The i Pad​

And for us fellas, with a wee bit more wriggling it also fits.... ahhhhhhh

 

[EesomeBeastie]

Some crazy things that we crazy Brits are known for saying:

British saying - Definition in American English

18.) Arse about tit - back to front

18.b) Arse OVER tit - tumbling head over heels

31.) knockers - breasts

See also:
bristols

43.) shambles - chaotic mess

This actually comes from the old word for a butchers. There are streets called The Shambles in many English towns with medieval roots, and those were the streets where the butchers shops were packed together, where the gutter in the middle of the street ran red with animal blood and offcuts of meat. A chaotic mess indeed!

54.) two finger salute - swear

I always thought this meant giving the V sign, a gestural obscenity rather than a verbal one.

 

[yeishia]

Thanks for the laugh I needed today, Yeishia!

You are more than welcome

18.b) Arse OVER tit - tumbling head over heels

See also:
bristols

This actually comes from the old word for a butchers. There are streets called The Shambles in many English towns with medieval roots, and those were the streets where the butchers shops were packed together, where the gutter in the middle of the street ran red with animal blood and offcuts of meat. A chaotic mess indeed!

I always thought this meant giving the V sign, a gestural obscenity rather than a verbal one.

Perfect thank you..its good to have you back

 

[yeishia]

​

 

[yeishia]

*giggles*

​

 

[Last_Rider]

*giggles*

​

lol, that's very funny my love

 

[yeishia]

lol, that's very funny my love

*giggles* what would I do without you my love

 

[yeishia]

 

[Mister J]

 

[yeishia]

 

[Last_Rider]

lol, a good man can do that too, but you're right in that wine is a more reliable source Very funny my love

 

[yeishia]

This cracked me up.

As some people like to add a little French to their posts for the sexual ambiance I thought I would post this as a how to or how not to reference.

(You must use a French accent when reading this out loud )​

 

[Rolando2]

Just click on the "DANCIN" link. I think you'll enjoy it!