Be as boring as possible.

[kiwi_submissive]

Blow up sheep always makes me wonder:

What kind of man is so bad at sex that even real sheep turn him down?

I think it's for the guys that are too slow to catch a real sheep. They really do run fast.

 

[Curious_in_Cali]

Hippopotomonstrosesquippedaliophobia is the fear of long words.

 

[Cattypuss]

Hippopotomonstrosesquippedaliophobia is the fear of long words.

Argh!

 

[Curious_in_Cali]

Argh!

Oh dear. That wasn't boring to you at all was it?

I'll try again...

Most American car horns honk in the key of F.

 

[gypsy*seer]

The washing machine smells funky...

 

[Sir_Winston54]

I clipped my fingernails this evening. Some of the little tiny clippings, as I trimmed the sharp corners off the edges of the nails, got away. I hope they don't germinate and grow in the carpet.

 

[waaitg]

Hippopotomonstrosesquippedaliophobia is the fear of long words.

Never use a long word when a diminutive one shall do.

 

[thesweetsweetness]

I re-folded the towels in the linen closet today while cleaning.

 

[PleasePeesMe]

I'm going to

put the kettle on

 

[kiwi_submissive]

I clipped my fingernails this evening. Some of the little tiny clippings, as I trimmed the sharp corners off the edges of the nails, got away. I hope they don't germinate and grow in the carpet.

If they do grow into a finger nail tree you could put in into a plant pot and sell it to an Avon lady to use as a for demonstrations of different nailpolish colours.

 

[DeepGreenEyes]

If they do grow into a finger nail tree you could put in into a plant pot and sell it to an Avon lady to use as a for demonstrations of different nailpolish colours.

I rented a DVD called "Eight Minute Cuticles." Feel the burn.

 

[Curious_in_Cali]

The estimated number of M & M’s sold each day in the United States is 200,000,000.

 

[Analog38]

My eyelids are heavy.

 

[Sir_Winston54]

My eyelids are heavy.

They have diet and exercise programs for that, you know.

 

[kiwi_submissive]

I played Pizza Roulette with my flatmate. Hells Pizza put REALLY hot chilli sauce on one slice of pizza, trouble is that you have no idea which piece it is.

There are three pieces left over and neither of us are brave enough to eat them.

 

[londoner2]

I think it's for the guys that are too slow to catch a real sheep. They really do run fast.

I have never had sex with a sheep but understand from a Welsh friend that there are two sure ways to success...

Wear a pair of Wellington boots. This allows you to slip the back feet of the sheep into the front of the boots and denies it the opportunity to run away.

If at all possible try to trap the sheep with which you intend to have sex at the edge of a cliff. Not only will it not want to run forward to certain death but may also be worried enough to push back - so improving the experience for both parties...

 

[Cattypuss]

My dog has had dandruff lately.

 

[IsabellaKing]

Yesterday I counted the telegraph poles between my house and the roundabout at the end of the road.

 

[waaitg]

The highlight of my day was a taking a picture of a cake that looks like the textbook for one of my courses.

 

[DeepGreenEyes]

A neuron fired in my brain this morning at exactly 10:07 and 56 seconds, reinforcing a pleasurable association between my tastebuds and a wasabi almond.

 

[Cattypuss]

If I had buck teeth, I wouldn't burn my lips when eating corn on the cob.

 

[londoner2]

Yesterday I counted the telegraph poles between my house and the roundabout at the end of the road.

I was disappointed to find I was unable to follow your example. There is no roundabout at the end of my road - but a T-junction at the top and another at the bottom... And then I lost count when a neighbour started to discuss her privet with me.

 

[kiwi_submissive]

I find myself unable to take a post seriously that has the word panties in it. Including this post Maybe because it's a word that is not really used over here, thank god.

 

[Cattypuss]

I find myself unable to take a post seriously that has the word panties in it. Including this post Maybe because it's a word that is not really used over here, thank god.

Ditto here from a Brit. The word is intrinsically snigger-inducing - and not in a good way.

 

[kiwi_submissive]

Ditto here from a Brit. The word is intrinsically snigger-inducing - and not in a good way.

Thanks Catty, i thought it might be just me who sniggered like a teenager while having images of creepy older guys using really bad pick up lines.