Car Sex

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Yes. Me, please. I'm in. But in someone else's car...

Detail Guy: Uh, ma'am, if you could just tell me what that stain is, we could...
Me: I said DON'T WORRY ABOUT IT!

You think I'm kidding? One time I masturbated on a road trip, it was on black upholstery. Up until we sold it, my ex would look at the ghost of a stain and get a little bit hard. (I think he didn't even try to get it out... the dirty fucker.)
 
Yes. Me, please. I'm in. But in someone else's car...

Detail Guy: Uh, ma'am, if you could just tell me what that stain is, we could...
Me: I said DON'T WORRY ABOUT IT!

You think I'm kidding? One time I masturbated on a road trip, it was on black upholstery. Up until we sold it, my ex would look at the ghost of a stain and get a little bit hard. (I think he didn't even try to get it out... the dirty fucker.)
I wouldn't try to get it out either. Every day it'd remind me.
 
I am certain my wife and I conceived at least one of our children in a car--like I remember the time, which car we were in, and where we were parked. Cars were common places for our sexual encounters from way back when we were teens through to our mid- or late-30s. I think the biggest difference is that modern cars no longer have big comfy bench seats like the olden days.

Back seats also have a bunch more seatbelts, which can prove less than comfy. The 1970 valiant, the '74 Lincoln, and various minivans were all fantastic. Wife's prius... not so much, especially as we get older.
 
I am certain my wife and I conceived at least one of our children in a car-

That actually reminds me of one of my favorite jokes.

A daughter asked her parents how they came up with the names for her and her siblings.

"Well," her mom answers, "we named you all after where you were conceived. Your sister Cheyenne, your brother Denver, get it?"

"Wait a second..." the daughter says.

Her mom responds, "Listen, Toyota..."

🤣
 
I used to have a car with benchseats and a column gear shift. The front and back seats could be converted into a double bed. So it had nightly use when I was dating. It as also ideal at a Drive-In theatre. Remember those?
 
That actually reminds me of one of my favorite jokes.

A daughter asked her parents how they came up with the names for her and her siblings.

"Well," her mom answers, "we named you all after where you were conceived. Your sister Cheyenne, your brother Denver, get it?"

"Wait a second..." the daughter says.

Her mom responds, "Listen, Toyota..."

🤣
So my kids would have names like "Chicago" or "Chrysler" or "Carnival Fun Ship Elation"!
 
I used to have a car with benchseats and a column gear shift. The front and back seats could be converted into a double bed. So it had nightly use when I was dating. It as also ideal at a Drive-In theatre. Remember those?

1967 Nash Ambassador did that. Got it free from the neighbor when I was about 14, but never got it running. Ended up scrapping it and went with the Valiant after that. Valiant had a roomy back bench, but the vinyl upholstery made things sticky and sweaty.
 
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