Dear X,

[LaOrca]

Dear Guy That Finally Called Me,

After crushing on you forever and waiting two weeks for your call, can you please stop being so hard on yourself? I get the tough life, being bullied, and low self esteem but don't I count for something? I am pretty sure I do because we've hung out 5 times since you've called and you text me daily but all you focus on is the negative. You can be so sweet and your smile has me hooked...Also, stop just looking at my tits and grab them!!!! I get you are a virgin and all but make a move!!! I am being very slow with you but would like you to eventually surprise me...:

 

[pplwatching]

Dear LaOrca,

You count for a lot, but low self esteem and a negative outlook are two serious trump cards. This hand may be unplayable even with your ace. Caveat emptor.

ppl

 

[Lord Pmann]

Dear Rainshine,

Hahaha. Oh shit!!!! I couldn't stop laughing. But I know you've done something in retaliation. But I don't know what.

What did you do????

Scared Shitless,

Pmann

 

[Lord Pmann]

Dear Pmann,

I was less of a shit than you.

Don't fear,
Me

Indeed you were. But you ruined my totally rugged image.

 

[smallgirl]

Dear X,

To the young college student beside me in class today...what part of the syllabus and class rules about cell phones did you not understand. Turned off means OFF. Put away means OUT OF SIGHT(like in your purse if you cannot figure that part out). I(unlike you obviously) care much more about my grade then fucking Facebook. Grow up. It's a shame there are people out there who would love a chance to go to college(like me) and you could care less about anything but your phone. If you had listened you may have heard her say that homework was required and you wouldn't have looked so stupid when you asked if "Like, do we have to do this homework or can we just skip it?" REALLY????????

Small

 

[Saucyminx]

Dear Hobbes,

You will always have a spot in our garden and in our hearts.



Love,
Me

 

[NightL]

...you wouldn't have looked so stupid when you asked if "Like, do we have to do this homework or can we just skip it?" REALLY????????

competition subtract 1

Just smile at them and it will re-enforce their flawed beliefs. May even help to spread the disease of stupidity.

competition - many

 

[bobsgirl]

Dear X,

I am so touched that you sent me a message at FB. I know your heart is still broken and that you miss him terribly. Hold the memories close -- one day they will be a great comfort to you.

Best of everything,

bg

 

[BeachMomma]

Dear Daddy,

This is the 11th Father's Day without you. It's just not right. I still love you just as much as I did when I was a kid and ran across the tarmac to jump into your arms instead of waiting for you to come in the airport. If I could run to the Pearly Gates to give you a big hug, I'd be right there. I think about you every day, and I wish I could spend One More Day with you.

I love you Daddy.

 

[Saucyminx]

Dear Daddy,

This is the 11th Father's Day without you. It's just not right. I still love you just as much as I did when I was a kid and ran across the tarmac to jump into your arms instead of waiting for you to come in the airport. If I could run to the Pearly Gates to give you a big hug, I'd be right there. I think about you every day, and I wish I could spend One More Day with you.

I love you Daddy.

Dear Beachy,

Maybe he is hanging out with my dad--and I know just how you feel. Sometimes, I think what I wouldn't give for 5 more minutes with either of my parents. So big hugs to you. And darn it where are those tissues. . . again.

M

 

[BeachMomma]

Dear Beachy,

Maybe he is hanging out with my dad--and I know just how you feel. Sometimes, I think what I wouldn't give for 5 more minutes with either of my parents. So big hugs to you. And darn it where are those tissues. . . again.

M

Dear Minxie,

This is one hell of a tough day to get through. I've lost track of how many times I've cried today.

Hugs,
Beachy

 

[BeachMomma]

Dear Rainy,

Love ya Babe,

Me

 

[Saucyminx]

Dear Minxie,

This is one hell of a tough day to get through. I've lost track of how many times I've cried today.

Hugs,
Beachy

Yeah, Father's day is always miserable for me and it has been 14 years. I spent the day with my best friend shopping, who also has lost both parents. We were a mess , but with lots of giggling through the tears too. I left her for a moment in the shoe department and came back to see some strange woman hugging her. Better than when I left her in the shampoo aisle, just for a moment, and came back to see some strange guy telling her that she was too beautiful to be crying and could he have her phone number. I shooed him away--would have preferred doing so with a real shoe however that is how assault charges are born.

Hugs Beachy. I keep thinking they would hate for us to be sad, and to just be thankful we had such wonderful men in our lives. When that works, I'll let you know--so far no dice.

Dear Saucy & Beachy,

Much love to you both.

Me

Have I mentioned that I adore you lately? I'm going to mail myself to you so we can have a chocolate martini.

 

[Lord Pmann]

Dear Steve,

Thanks.

Cheers,

Pmann

 

[Treasured]

Dear Pappy,

I know its hard for you to understand why your little buddy hasn't stopped to see you and has declined all your offers for fishing together. Give him some time. He still hasn't adjusted to you dating the lady up the street. He often talks about how when nanny was alive she use to say she was nuttier than squirrel shit.

Trust me pappy, he will come around. I always knew how uncomfortable things were at home. Nanny wasn't always the easiest to live with and take care of. My children have forgotten how mean spirited she could be towards you and those who loved her.

It makes me smile to see you both so happy. E and I were on a committee for the school together and she is a remarkable woman who deserves a great man like you. But let's be honest with each other. It would be easier for my kids to understand and save me a lot of explaining of your "friendship" if they didn't see her car parked in your driveway over night.

As you told me the day of Nanny's funeral, "Time heals all living things." Buddy will heal from this too.

Love you always,
T

 

[Lord Pmann]

Dear Facebook,

You are amazing. I love logging in and making amazing posts that make people smile.

Cheers,

Little shithead poster

Dear Pmann,

Yes, you can curse Apple and their products all you like but they allow you to converse with some random across the seas and see her awesome cross-eyed face any time you feel like it!

Yay for Apple! Yay for Steve!

Love,
Apple Fan Girl

I've gotta say, I've got a love/hate relationship with them. But overall, I love the fact that it helps me connect with the Apple Fan Girl at the press of a button. So I can see her press her b... Never mind.

 

[Lord Pmann]

Hahaha right. In an ideal world!

Also. We had a truce!!

Yes. In an ideal world.

We DID have a truce. And someone broke it. Now we're even Stevens.

 

[BeachMomma]

Yes. In an ideal world.

We DID have a truce. And someone broke it. Now we're even Stevens.

It never works out like that! I'd hate to play Up The Ante against either of you!

 

[Lord Pmann]

It never works out like that! I'd hate to play Up The Ante against either of you!

Thanks to me, that little fucker is now a card carrying member of NAMBLA.

 

[NightL]

During your train ride - I took photos

 

[BeachMomma]

Thanks to me, that little fucker is now a card carrying member of NAMBLA.

He'll keep. When he leasts expects it, I will come knocking. *shakes fist angrily*

Dear X - and Y,

What the hell is NAMBLA?

It reminds me of a gif somebody posted of a little girl, cute as hell but in the midst of a ferocious temper tantrum.

Love,
Me

 

[Emerson40]

Dear X - and Y,

What the hell is NAMBLA?

It reminds me of a gif somebody posted of a little girl, cute as hell but in the midst of a ferocious temper tantrum.

Love,
Me

Dear Beach Lady,

I think it's from that song, about Betty.

Whoa, black betty (NAMBLA-lam)
Whoa, black betty (NAMBLA-lam)
She's from Birmingham (NAMBLA-lam)
Way down in alabam' (NAMBLA-lam)
Well, she's shakin' that thing (NAMBLA-lam)
Boy, she makes me sing (NAMBLA-lam)
Whoa, black betty (NAMBLA-lam)
Whoa, black betty NAMBLA-lam

She really gets me high (NAMBLA-lam)
You know that's no lie (NAMBLA-lam)
She's so rock steady (NAMBLA-lam)
And she's always ready (NAMBLA-lam)
Whoa, black betty (NAMBLA-lam)
Whoa, black betty (NAMBLA-lam)


Nickelback covered it I believe, as a B-side to some shiity single.

 

[NippleMuncher]

Nickelback covered it I believe, as a B-side to some shiity single.

It's Nickelback, they're all shitty.

 

[BeachMomma]

Dear Em and NM,

HEY! I happen to like Nickelback! (Some of their stuff anyway.)

Love,
Me

PS. Was Nickelback even around in the days of 45s and shitty B side singles?

 

[Emerson40]

Dear Beach Lady,

Nickelback, seriously?

I guess sometimes, for some folks, good taste can only be found in their mouth.

As for them being around at the time of 45s, I believe the better part of Chad Kroger was running down his mother's leg around the time vinyl was being replaced by the cd.

Yours in music,

Key of E