Depression. Anxiety. Panic Attacks. etc

[greenffingers]

Havent read whole thread but I thought about telling what have helped me a bit:

Writing own blog/diary.

I would suggest it since
- it's free
- it doesnt stress much (you can write what ever you want, when you want etc)
- you can do it anonymously
- in long run you can read it and see patterns, changes in condition
- it's a good way to meet other people with same problems
- you get feedback and support

It never hurts to know that there are people like you out there. Always.

A diary (in whatever form) is very helpul - helps take the stopper of all that churns inside and never gets out, building up black clouds. yeh, open the door through a diary and let the clear air blow in.

 

[Quoll]

Havent read whole thread but I thought about telling what have helped me a bit:

Writing own blog/diary.

I would suggest it since
- it's free
- it doesnt stress much (you can write what ever you want, when you want etc)
- you can do it anonymously
- in long run you can read it and see patterns, changes in condition
- it's a good way to meet other people with same problems
- you get feedback and support

It never hurts to know that there are people like you out there. Always.

I couldn`t agree more, I guess this thread has become a bit of a diary for me, even though that was never the original intent.

A diary (in whatever form) is very helpul - helps take the stopper of all that churns inside and never gets out, building up black clouds. yeh, open the door through a diary and let the clear air blow in.

 

[Shotokan07]

Hey guys, just wanted to tell about my latest theraputic sessions - roller coasters at the Six Flags theme park. For the 10-50 I've been in the ride... I was completely to myself and act whichever way I wanted. It may not be the best way of seeing this, but being 100s of above ground and coming down hard or being flipped 100 mph, I had no wonders to think about or being anxious infront of others... but just be me. I haven't felt this way since I was really young. I loved the adranaline rush in my body pumping hard and scream as loud as I can freely.

...Truly, a Wow.

 

[Tap-Out]

Tap,
Ok, in a somewhat better frame of mind today, I think I can share some more (hopefully) constructive thoughts.

Having nothing in your life make sense, yeah thatactually makes a lot of sense to me.
I think often we are our own worst enemy, you try to talk yourself up, and then there is this little voice that picks holes in everything you think.

Feeling alone, with you on that one too, some would probably think me strange for saying that, seeing as I have a wife I love totally and two beautiful kids. But when this shit hits you it`s often hard to dump even more stuff onto her, and I don`t have any close friends nearby that I can talk to about this stuff. (Hold The IMs please) However I do have two incredibly supportive friends here on lit who have talked me through so much stuff when I have been both physically and mentally alone. There are also dozens of people here who make their presence felt in so many good ways, this truly is a very supportive community.

I have to say we all seem to fight off this urge to just break down and cry, and yet on the occasions that it can`t be stopped it is so cathartic, I have to wonder why we fight it so much.

Not sure if this is any better than my original reply to your post, but I guess I`m trying to say don`t let life piss you off too much, don`t let any bastards take the piss out of you, stay of the piss, don`t get to pissed at me and have a pisser of a time when you can.

Quoll,

First of all let me say it's great to hear you're doing better.

That's exactially what I'm doing. I saw a chance at something that sounded like it would be a very good thing, but now as I sit here I analyse and analyse everything to death. The more I look at it, the worse it seems, which makes me feel even worse for getting myself into these situations, wondering how time after time after time I get myself into these kind of messes with seemingly no way out. Part of the orignal decision I made was to help me get away from a lot of my past demons, but damn the more I hear and the more I think the more it seems like I'm putting myself moreso back to my demons than I would have been before.

I truly do envy you for all the people around you that you do have. It's far more than I have. I have managed to make some good friends since I've been here in Australia, but noone nearly good enough to talk with about these kinds of problems. Hell even back home in Canada I only had... one... maybe two people I could turn to when my chips were down, now one of them has joined the forces and I've since lost contact with him, and the other is living his own life, and because of the time difference between here and there it makes it really really hard to talk to him even online. Like you I do have a couple of good friends here on Lit, but again they have their own lives, and they have helped me a great great deal, but even still there are things I can't turn to them for help on. But I keep reaching and it is slowly... very very slowly getting... well not so much better, but at least more tollerable. It's better than nothing I guess.

I rekon I fight off the urge to just break down and cry because I'll personally feel worse for letting this thing "get the best of me" so I'll hold it off just for spite I guess. However it may be doing more harm than good holding it all back. But it's just my make up not to let it out, so damned if it's going to happen any time soon I rekon.

You taking a piss on me mate? It's really funny you say that because I was just telling someone in another thread the many many uses we have for the word Piss. Such a versitle word it is.

Cheers

Tap

 

[wildtiger60]

You taking a piss on me mate? It's really funny you say that because I was just telling someone in another thread the many many uses we have for the word Piss. Such a versitle word it is.

Cheers

Tap

Funny meeting you here. I made my first post yesterday here, and i came to check out if there was any replies...and low and behold here is tap-out...lol....still talking about piss, eh?

 

[Quoll]

Shotokan,
Can`t say the rollercoaster would be therapeutic for me, not unless "hurling" is therapeutic.
However I do understand the adrenaline rush, glad that you could cut loose for a while.

Tap,
Over analysing, it`s what we do, and it`s as common as mud apparently, according to the anxiety counsellor I was talking to.

I`m still working out how to deal with a lot of this stuff this time around, it`s very different from last time.
What sucks is it`s often everything leading up to making change or going through with whatever you decide, the actual deed itself can be almost anticlimactic in a way.
If you are anything like me you would be suprised where friends come from, I `m only just starting to realise how many I actually have.

Hmm the breaking down bit, I have done it a few times, and it wasn`t something I wanted to happen, been burying stuff for years but at some point it just forced it`s way out. Perhaps you have some other sort of outlet that lets you get some of the crap out of your system, or you could try shotokans rollercoaster therapy.

As for taking the piss out of you, well let`s just say old (lurking) habits die hard. It was a good thread though.

wildtiger,
Welcome back, hope you are finding things that can help, let us know what works for you. at the moment I have a couple of songs that were sent to me by some very good friends and I tend to play them when things get a bit stressfull like today.
I am going to have to work hard on this cognitive therapy stuff, so far I am not sure it is doing much, as I have always known it was something in me, rather than an illness or heart attack or similar. Any way not going to let this beat me.

 

[Tap-Out]

Tap,
Over analysing, it`s what we do, and it`s as common as mud apparently, according to the anxiety counsellor I was talking to.

I`m still working out how to deal with a lot of this stuff this time around, it`s very different from last time.
What sucks is it`s often everything leading up to making change or going through with whatever you decide, the actual deed itself can be almost anticlimatic in a way.
If you are anything like me you would be suprised where friends come from, I `m only just starting to realise how many I actually have.

Hmm the breaking down bit, I have done it a few times, and it wasn`t something I wanted to happen, been burying stuff for years but at some point it just forced it`s way out. Perhaps you have some other sort of outlet that lets you get some of the crap out of your system, or you could try shotokans rollercoaster therapy.

As for taking the piss out of you, well let`s just say old (lurking) habits die hard. It was a good thread though.

Quoll,

Yeah I realize that my latest decision will be sort of anti-climatic when it all comes to a head, so at least I'm not looking to fail that way. I'm just worried about the consiquenses (or however that's spelled) after it's all said and done that are playing heavily on my mind.

Bugger the rollercoaster therapy. Nothing aginst the suggestion or method, I just know it's not for me. But I have given myself an outlet for stress relief and something to look forward to all in one go. As soon as my shoulder becomes 100% again I'm redoubling my workout regimine to get back into shape (well another shape besides round that is ). Then when I move again I'm going to join a BJJ school again in Vancouver and start training again. Start as a white belt and work my way through the ranks once again.

Mate you can take the piss on me any time anywhere you like. Nobody takes a harder piss on Tap-Out than Tap-Out. I have very broad shoulders in that regard and in most cases I'll help you out with the playful putdowns, so feel free to have at it.

Cheers

Tap

 

[Tap-Out]

Funny meeting you here. I made my first post yesterday here, and i came to check out if there was any replies...and low and behold here is tap-out...lol....still talking about piss, eh?

Yeap. Here I am. Just like that bad rash you can't get rid of no matter how hard you may try.

Of course we're still talking about piss and it's many many uses. We use piss more than you use 'eh (and I know from personal first hand experience it's a damn large amount ).

 

[Shotokan07]

Quoll, part of it was something like, "Once you go with this, you can't go back". These definite decisions made a forceful release in my mind. There wasn't anymore "what if's"... once I was going down 100-120 mph... that was it. Either I closed my eyes or not, I was going down.

...I love it.

 

[Is That My Tie]

just got diagnosed today

popped first half tablet at lunchtime

they tell me tis a long road

starts with one step - hope I have the stength to keep walkin

:-/

 

[Bandit58]

just got diagnosed today

popped first half tablet at lunchtime

they tell me tis a long road

starts with one step - hope I have the stength to keep walkin

:-/

Sometimes we are a lot stronger than we think we are......hang in there, you will make it

 

[Is That My Tie]

Sometimes we are a lot stronger than we think we are......hang in there, you will make it

thankee Bandit - appreciate the thoughts

 

[Quoll]

just got diagnosed today

popped first half tablet at lunchtime

they tell me tis a long road

starts with one step - hope I have the stength to keep walkin

:-/

Can indeed be a long road, but in no way is it a road without end.
You had the courage to take that first step, that is the most important step.

 

[Ibsen]

I am to goto Belgium a coupple of days this sumer to be at a friends wedding. I am gonna sleep at one of his friends place. Found out some days ago they are big chain-smokers. I got really stressed out, asI for once do not smoke, and second, knows that 75% of all toxics goes out to the room, and not in the smokers lungs, wich means I will get a big dose of those 75%. First, I tried as nicely as possible say that I have a bit of smoke-phobia, buit guess if my friend managed me to ask him again. Sure, I have asked if he can smoke outside, but still. Can feel the smoke in my lungs right now... Right now, I am kinda stressed out. Not only becouse of that, but a part of it anyway... I am however not even sure I can attend the wedding, as I might (hopefully) work this sumer, even if I doubt it...

 

[Guest]

Hugs, love and kisses to all. I hope everyone has a wonderful weekend.

 

[wildtiger60]

Yeap. Here I am. Just like that bad rash you can't get rid of no matter how hard you may try.

Of course we're still talking about piss and it's many many uses. We use piss more than you use 'eh (and I know from personal first hand experience it's a damn large amount ).

Well piss then, eh!! Put them together, sweet aussie-can music!!

Hey all,
I went to the gym today, and I used their Far-Infrared sauna, and it had soft, relaxing music playing in it, and before i got in it, I was having panic chest pains, but then after about 5 minutes it was winderful...sooo relaxing...I didn't want it to end, but thirty minutes was up, and its not recommended to stay any longer. BUt still it was soooo relaxing and stress relieving...took my panic chest pains away almost immediately.

 

[Shotokan07]

Hugs, love and kisses to all. I hope everyone has a wonderful weekend.

Thanks Saldne, hope you enjoy your weekend well.

 

[Amonara]

Things aren't looking so good tonight. I just want to crawl into a whole and cry, or just wait for the numbness to set in. Dealing with this is a lot harder than I thought it would be. I'm just concentrating on taking deep steady breaths, it's helping some. It helps to get some of it out here, as always.

Kinda feel like I brought down the thread again. I hope everyone else is doing well.

 

[Quoll]

Things aren't looking so good tonight. I just want to crawl into a whole and cry, or just wait for the numbness to set in. Dealing with this is a lot harder than I thought it would be. I'm just concentrating on taking deep steady breaths, it's helping some. It helps to get some of it out here, as always.

Kinda feel like I brought down the thread again. I hope everyone else is doing well.

Hey if it was about bringing the thread down, they would have kicked me off here months ago.

It`s about YOU, anytime you post anything at all it`s about doing something for yourself, good, bad, happy or sad, never feel like you cant off load here, that`s what it is all about.
Tomorrow will come you know.

 

[Quoll]

Lose a job, starting a part time one, personal shit, depression, major anxiety, all within a few days, fuck, life is good.(sarcasm)

 

[Amonara]

Thank you for reminding me that tomorrow does come, Quoll. It did and with it I was able to get rid of alot of the weight off of my shoulders. Not only that but I was able to deep breathe my way out of a panic attack, definitely a good sign.

I hope things get better with you, Quoll. And I'm sorry you've got so much to deal with right now.

 

[Tap-Out]

Lose a job, starting a part time one, personal shit, depression, major anxiety, all within a few days, fuck, life is good.(sarcasm)

Mate it could always be worse. You could be in my life right now.

In the last 14 days I've: been turned down for a perminant full time work visa for a period of at least 6 months, lost my job that I loved so much because of it, been told I can't get an earlier flight back home, been pretty much rejected by everybody I've known here, dislocated my shoulder, been getting increasingly more depressed, and just last night I got a message from home saying one of my good friends that I've known for a long long time has passed away due to a major heartattack, and I'm absolutely stuck here so I can't even get home to properly say goodbye.

So chin up mate. It could be worse, you could be me right now.

 

[Tap-Out]

This morning I woke up completely dissapointed I did. When I signed on this morning I had a good friend there who sat there and listened as I dumped and dumped all my problems, thoughs, and everything else I could possibally pour out onto her. I'm deeply grateful for that. Seems like she's always been there for me. But you know something. Tonight when I finally go to sleep, I still don't think I want to wake up the next day. Tomorrow is another day sure, but what if you're not looking forward to that one either? What then?

 

[Ibsen]

Thinking of joining the French Foreign Legion after school as a musician. Yes, they have such also. Thing is, I really suck at trumpet, so I better practise real good... Wich I cant cause I feel so much apathy! Fuck it! Fuck it all! Argh!

If something is to blame it is that I have been ill some weeks ago, and I never really came in to the practise-schedual after that, even if I of course do practise. Latest just some minutes ago.

 

[Ibsen]

Been thinking, and I think I would succeed better as a chef. If I enlist at all.