Dom in a fight: What a Sub gonna do?

[graceanne]

K's been known to get in fights. Normally with his brother. As long as they keep it quiet, and don't break anything, I've learned to let them. As a rule I support K, but frankly I don't care who's in the right. As soon as fists are thrown, they're both imature babies. If they were any younger I'd paddle 'em and put 'em in a corner?

Un-subbie? Well, it's not the first time I've been accused of that. But I'm not going to pretend something I don't feel. Fist fights are juvenile. If someone is bugging you so much that you need to throw a punch, GET IN YOUR CAR AND LEAVE.

 

[3113]

So what book was that??? Inquiring minds want to know!!

Heh. I'll have to hope the author isn't reading this forum under a psudonym--or at least doesn't take offense at what I'm going to say....

The writer was David Feintuch and the argument I had with this guy was over Feintuch's "Seafort Saga" books which start with the book Midshipman's Hope. The bee in bonnet, the thing the guy was arguing over, was that he felt I should not be applying the morals, cultural beliefs, etc, that I saw in the book to the author. His argument was that an author can have different morals, believes, faiths, etc. from his character or his story. I found this obvious, a given; Thomas Harris, for example, can present the morals of a serial killer without believing those morals himself; he can describe despicable acts without approving of them or wanting to indulge in them himself. That's the magic of writing; a good writer can view the world through the eyes of many different types of characters with conviction and such authenticity that a reader may not be sure what the author thinks or believes. But I did not feel this was true of Feintuch's books,

The reason I didn't believe it of Feintuch "Hope" books was that they contained an excessive amount of sadomachocism relentlessly happening to the very admirable hero, proposed a draconian shipboard culture where every officer was a "Master" who had to be obeyed absolutely, and punishment of underlings included a lot of cannings. By the third book, Feintuch's reasonable explanation for all this, comparing long space voyages to 18th/19th century sailing vessels and the need for such unforgiving strictness...seemed a little contrived and convenient. I really began to feel that this author wasn't invisible.

And that's the thing that my opponent in the argument refused to consider. That some authors don't try to be invisible. They write stuff that is near and dear to them--things that they believe, want to preach or just want to indulge in (as so many writers here will attest to). And that's fine by me. It was not, however, fine for my opponent. He believed that if I didn't believe in the "invisibleness" of one author, that I couldn't believe in the invisibleness of any author and was in the wrong.

I walked away from this argument as there was no convincing this guy, but I felt pretty well justified in my "visible author" opinion when Feintuch, finished with the "Hope" series, went on to write a fantasy book. Completely different universe. Now, if my learned opponent had been right, if the "Hope" books were not the author's indulgence in BDSM, they were just a theme of those books...then, well, there'd be something completely different in this fantasy book, right? Wrong. The hero of the fantasy series, a spoilt prince, learns that suffering and a good whipping are the path to righteousness and eventually *asks* to be whipped on a regular basis.

"invisibility" is more important to some authors than to others.

 

[FurryFury]

Heh. I'll have to hope the author isn't reading this forum under a psudonym--or at least doesn't take offense at what I'm going to say....

The writer was David Feintuch and the argument I had with this guy was over Feintuch's "Seafort Saga" books which start with the book Midshipman's Hope. The bee in bonnet, the thing the guy was arguing over, was that he felt I should not be applying the morals, cultural beliefs, etc, that I saw in the book to the author. His argument was that an author can have different morals, believes, faiths, etc. from his character or his story. I found this obvious, a given; Thomas Harris, for example, can present the morals of a serial killer without believing those morals himself; he can describe despicable acts without approving of them or wanting to indulge in them himself. That's the magic of writing; a good writer can view the world through the eyes of many different types of characters with conviction and such authenticity that a reader may not be sure what the author thinks or believes. But I did not feel this was true of Feintuch's books,

The reason I didn't believe it of Feintuch "Hope" books was that they contained an excessive amount of sadomachocism relentlessly happening to the very admirable hero, proposed a draconian shipboard culture where every officer was a "Master" who had to be obeyed absolutely, and punishment of underlings included a lot of cannings. By the third book, Feintuch's reasonable explanation for all this, comparing long space voyages to 18th/19th century sailing vessels and the need for such unforgiving strictness...seemed a little contrived and convenient. I really began to feel that this author wasn't invisible.

And that's the thing that my opponent in the argument refused to consider. That some authors don't try to be invisible. They write stuff that is near and dear to them--things that they believe, want to preach or just want to indulge in (as so many writers here will attest to). And that's fine by me. It was not, however, fine for my opponent. He believed that if I didn't believe in the "invisibleness" of one author, that I couldn't believe in the invisibleness of any author and was in the wrong.

I walked away from this argument as there was no convincing this guy, but I felt pretty well justified in my "visible author" opinion when Feintuch, finished with the "Hope" series, went on to write a fantasy book. Completely different universe. Now, if my learned opponent had been right, if the "Hope" books were not the author's indulgence in BDSM, they were just a theme of those books...then, well, there'd be something completely different in this fantasy book, right? Wrong. The hero of the fantasy series, a spoilt prince, learns that suffering and a good whipping are the path to righteousness and eventually *asks* to be whipped on a regular basis.

"invisibility" is more important to some authors than to others.

Thank you for answering my question!

*Wonders if this should be up for a BDSM book of the month club selection*

 

[3113]

But, I'd like to think that we Doms are not as likely to pick a fight, or be goated into a fight by someone else. I'm not the fighting type. I only beat on women, after all.

Well, now you've got me curious about the Dom side....Let me ask you this:

Let's imagine that you go to some public party (like an office party or school reunion) and you meet a guy who rubs you the wrong way. Without intending to, you get sucked into a heated discussion with this guy. You've got your emotions under control up to a point. That is, you're not going punch his lights out, and you'll certainly walk away rather than get into an ugly, name-calling shouting match. But testosterone is rearing up on both sides and whatever it is you're arguing about, it's getting a little intense. Both of you are posturing.

Now, let's imagine that, in response, your Sub is going to take the second most popular option (so far!) in this poll. That is, they're not going to step up to you and say, "Dearest, maybe it'd be best to end the discussion now..." and steer you clear of this guy. Instead, you feel your sub there at your shoulder, ready to support you, on your side right-or-wrong. We will hypothetically suppose that from the way she is looking at the guy you're arguing with, you get the message that you have only to point and say, "Kill!" and she'll rip out this guy's throat for you. Probably with her teeth.

Imagining yourself in this hypothetical situation if you can...how would that make you feel?

 

[3113]

Thank you for answering my question!

*Wonders if this should be up for a BDSM book of the month club selection*

Midshipman's Hope is an enjoyable and fairly well written, space opera-ish sci-fi, though I don't know if it's still in print or easy to find on local bookshelves. If you're looking for BDSM book of the month club books, however, and you don't mind a trilogy, I'd recommend fantasy author Anne Bishop. Talk about an author whose doesn't hide her BDSM under a bushel. I'm betting you already have read her, but if not, the three books you want to start with are:

Daughter of Blood
Heir of Shadows
Queen of Darkness

That gives you three months of books to read about and discuss.

 

[DVS]

Well, now you've got me curious about the Dom side....Let me ask you this:

Let's imagine that you go to some public party (like an office party or school reunion) and you meet a guy who rubs you the wrong way. Without intending to, you get sucked into a heated discussion with this guy. You've got your emotions under control up to a point. That is, you're not going punch his lights out, and you'll certainly walk away rather than get into an ugly, name-calling shouting match. But testosterone is rearing up on both sides and whatever it is you're arguing about, it's getting a little intense. Both of you are posturing.

Now, let's imagine that, in response, your Sub is going to take the second most popular option (so far!) in this poll. That is, they're not going to step up to you and say, "Dearest, maybe it'd be best to end the discussion now..." and steer you clear of this guy. Instead, you feel your sub there at your shoulder, ready to support you, on your side right-or-wrong. We will hypothetically suppose that from the way she is looking at the guy you're arguing with, you get the message that you have only to point and say, "Kill!" and she'll rip out this guy's throat for you. Probably with her teeth.

Imagining yourself in this hypothetical situation if you can...how would that make you feel?

Well, of course, I'd cap his ass and have my Be'och dispose of what's left.

Oh, but we were being hypothetical only, right? In that case, if I were to imagine the situation you describe, and I would have to imagine it, because I would never catch myself in such a scene alone, and I sure wouldn't with someone with me.

But, we are only being hypothetical here, because this situation would never happen in reality. And my sub would never choose that particular option, although I'm aware it's also within this hypothetical situation so I guess I can imagine she did...only because I have a very good imagination. After all, both of us are over 50. Ater a certain age, you become smart about these things, even if you aren't a Dom.

So, in a hypothetical situation, and because my imagination is quite vivid and clear, I can picture her showing her teeth. I might even be able to imagine she's growling a little. How's that for an imagination? Pretty cool, huh?

I can also imagine her claws are out, but in reality, she'd have to grow them some more to be much of a threat there. OK...OK, I can imagine they are long and sharp.

OK, where was I? Oh, yes, I was imagining this hypothetical situation ypu've devised where I'm suppose to assume my sub would want to rip this imaginary guy's throat out, just because I am having a problem with him.

Well, let's see...if she was willing to stand up and fght for me, first and foremost, I'd be concerned about her. But, if I'm to imagine she's not as small and defensiless as she looks, but closer to the Tazmanian devil, I think I'd be proud of her for sticking by me.

Now, in reality, I'd also be proud of her. Because she has a mind of her own and she never hesitates to use it. So, in this hypothetical situation where testosterone levels are high, she'd be showing her teeth, and I'd probably be doing my best to keep her from stepping in and taking over...mid 50s or not. And speaking of the mid 50s, the testosterone tends to diminish after 45, I think. But, aside from all of that, is this what you had im mind for your hypothetical situation?
<==== the roar of my submissive. Trust me, it's only a meow. Oh, but it's a strong meow.

 

[Recidiva]

I told my husband about this thread. I mentioned my unwillingness to attempt to intervene in a physical fight he'd gotten into.

He said "There's only one person who tried to stop me once I'd gotten going. He was a friend, but my first instinct was to put my elbow in his face, which is what I did. Once the adrenalin is going, don't try to stop me."

I've been with him for many years, I've heard tons of fight stories and I know enough about him to know he's a killing machine with a temper not to be measured. He was trained special forces in the military and you don't want to try to wake him up by startling him, his instincts are also unerring and painful. His hobby in the military while posted in Germany was to go to the Turkish bars there that were off limits because brawls always started, as the Turkish population hated American GI's. So he did that every night and got into fights for fun. He'd beat up the combat instructors and his nickname was "Crazy White Boy."

I've known him for fifteen years, been with him for eight. He hasn't gotten into a fight in my presence. I've had some combat training and I'm pretty tough on my own, but he's beyond my skill to the nth degree.

However, I wouldn't mind seeing him in action at least once. I've heard all about it, I might be too curious to stop it.

Part of our marriage vows involved neither of us doing anything involving jail time, and that includes crime and assault. At times we're both strained to keep this vow.

He'd be the guy that would take you down for insulting someone who can't fight for themselves, or abusing an animal. He doesn't pick a fight, but he will finish it. Most people getting one look at him are infinitely more willing to apologize than fight him.

He's also not afraid of singing in public, crying in public, or any other things that other people might be concerned about. This guy's walked down the hallways at work singing "Wig in a Box" from Hedwig and the Angry Inch. The guys avert their eyes and the women all say "OOOOh, I didn't know you could sing!"

 

[ownedsubgal]

He'd be the guy that would take you down for insulting someone who can't fight for themselves, or abusing an animal. He doesn't pick a fight, but he will finish it. Most people getting one look at him are infinitely more willing to apologize than fight him.

He's also not afraid of singing in public, crying in public, or any other things that other people might be concerned about. This guy's walked down the hallways at work singing "Wig in a Box" from Hedwig and the Angry Inch. The guys avert their eyes and the women all say "OOOOh, I didn't know you could sing!"

lol, your Husband sounds sooo much like Daddy here. He's also not the type to care what anyone thinks of him and never feels a need to fit in (yet always does, for the same reasons). and he also has a very fierce temper, which sometimes can be easily triggered. if someone provokes him, or harms someone he views as defenseless, then he will beat them senseless. i'd heard some horror stories about some of the fights he's been in too, from his former slave, but had never really seen it in full force for myself, until this particular saturday night.

we were at a club, just chilling and having a good time, and two guys across the room get into an argument. then all of a sudden one guy breaks a bottle over the other guy's head, and of course the club turns to pandemonium, with everyone running around like chickens. now Daddy had been watching all of this, from the moment the argument started, because he's constantly aware of his environment and on the alert for any sort of trouble. He's talking and laughing with you but out of the corner of his eye he's looking at that nervous looking guy by the door and following his every move...that kinda thing. so after the bottle thing Daddy instantly gets up, shoves me behind one of his Dom friends, and heads directly to the guy who instigated the fight, whacks him upside the head, picks him back up and holds him over the balcony. it was only a two-story drop, but the guy looked like he was about to tinkle on himself and was thoroughly humiliated, which really was the whole point. when the police came Daddy just casually let him go, and the guy fell to the street and ran away. then we went on with our evening as normal. i have to say, it was very exciting to see him in action, against someone other than me. it was like all the thrill, without the paralyzing fear, lol.

 

[Netzach]

I can't even imagine myself into these kinds of things very well.

My husband and I have a "everyone run away, don't be heroes" pact and I wear non-sexy shoes when we go out to punk shows. I don't think any less of him - it's when people bite off things they can't chew that I think they're a pussy. Even if he were the Dom I wouldn't give a rat's ass and I think he'd be guarding my safety best by knowing how to keep us both most likely to get away alive.

If I want protection I prefer a firearm to a dog or a dude.

 

[3113]

Well, let's see...if she was willing to stand up and fght for me, first and foremost, I'd be concerned about her. But, if I'm to imagine she's not as small and defensiless as she looks, but closer to the Tazmanian devil, I think I'd be proud of her for sticking by me.

Glad you got a laugh off this. Of course, you could have *just* imagined yourself and your sub at age 20 or so (testosterone back and all), that might have been easier than having her grow claws and the rest

But I try never to interfere with imaginations.

Thanks for the answer

 

[3113]

I told my husband about this thread. I mentioned my unwillingness to attempt to intervene in a physical fight he'd gotten into.

He said "There's only one person who tried to stop me once I'd gotten going. He was a friend, but my first instinct was to put my elbow in his face, which is what I did. Once the adrenalin is going, don't try to stop me."

Oh, I'm in agreement once the fight has turned physical--then it's really out of the sub's hands. Especially if we're taking about young guys who are keyed up. If my hypothetical situation was "sub sees Dom kicking another guy's ass...." well, the poll would be a lot shorter:
1) Start taking bets while cheering Dom on
2) Run for help
3) Go get the first aid kit and call the lawyer

 

[FurryFury]

Midshipman's Hope is an enjoyable and fairly well written, space opera-ish sci-fi, though I don't know if it's still in print or easy to find on local bookshelves. If you're looking for BDSM book of the month club books, however, and you don't mind a trilogy, I'd recommend fantasy author Anne Bishop. Talk about an author whose doesn't hide her BDSM under a bushel. I'm betting you already have read her, but if not, the three books you want to start with are:

Daughter of Blood
Heir of Shadows
Queen of Darkness

That gives you three months of books to read about and discuss.

Interesting stuff!

I didn't much like Daughter of Blood though.

 

[3113]

Interesting stuff!

I didn't much like Daughter of Blood though.

Oh, I agree. I think her books have serious problems if you're going to take them as "serious" fantasy. They're unapologetically Indulgent (use a capitol "I" there) BDSM Romantic fantasy, with no logic or consistency to the universe or the characters. The sort of books that readers slurp up like chocolate mocha drinks--all calories and a caffine buzz, no nutrition. But they more than fit the bill if one is looking for a writer who is putting her BDSM out there, no question and no attempt to hide it under a plain brown paper wrapper

 

[Marquis]

Hey,, Marquis? Is this one of your alts?

No, but I'll tell you a funny story.


Several months ago I went to see Apocolypto with C. During the movie there was a guy sitting several rows behind us that would scream during every action sequence.

Every time someone would get stabbed or clobbered over the head it was,

"OOOH SHIT!!!"

"BAM, HE TOOK IT!!"


It was unbearable. I sat in my seat steaming like a clam, trying unsuccessfully to ignore the offending patron. As we were leaving the theater I told him his behavior was totally rude and he needed to keep his mouth shut or something like that. I was walking away and he told his girlfriend in a loud voice that he was going to "bitch slap my punk ass."

Well, that was pretty much it. I turned around and slapped him in the face. Soon there was an all out brawl in the hallway of the theater. The other moviegoers seemed quite entertained as we drew a big crowd, theatrically throwing each other over garbage cans and such.

I caught a few glimpses of my beautiful sub C looking at me in disgust while all of this was going on. Normally this would've been fine, but while I was mid-fight with the assclown, his girlfriend was scratching my face and such. During a point where I had gained control of the situation, I asked C to please contain the female, to which she simply shook her head sadly.

Eventually, security approached us with me having the young buster in a headlock and his girlfriend ripping my necklace off. I think if the guard hadn't shown up at that moment, I would've punched his girl right in the face.

Cops came and took our names down, neither of us wanted to press charges and we left peacefully.

C and I had a bit of a discussion over this afterwards. She felt like I was being a child, I felt like she could've at least restrained the female.

Here's my take on this. I don't consider myself a common brawler. I usually sidestep situations like this rather artfully, but every once in a while there is a person who absolutely needs to get their asses kicked. If I make this decision, it would be cool for anyone in service to me to support it.

I'm not asking for her to jump in the dog pile, in fact, I would usually prefer she stay out of it completely, but this was an unusual situation in that I was also being attacked by a girl and I wasn't going to hit the girl.

Probably.

 

[FurryFury]

Oh, I agree. I think her books have serious problems if you're going to take them as "serious" fantasy. They're unapologetically Indulgent (use a capitol "I" there) BDSM Romantic fantasy, with no logic or consistency to the universe or the characters. The sort of books that readers slurp up like chocolate mocha drinks--all calories and a caffine buzz, no nutrition. But they more than fit the bill if one is looking for a writer who is putting her BDSM out there, no question and no attempt to hide it under a plain brown paper wrapper

I didn't find it to be very BDSM-y because the guys were supposed to be totally subjugated and weren't, at least the lead male characters weren't, not really. Somehow they were fairly free to do as they wished despite lip service to being enslaved.

The poor slubs that were, had not consented.

The women did horrible things like mutilate the privates of the men and even killing them aka breaking their toys, wtf?

The names of characters were too "cute" for me. The world too little defined.

That first book was a BDSM book of the month club selection but I was, as I often am, highly disappointed with it.

However, frothy mocha coffee drinks, I'm never disappointed in. Those things deliver! Woo hoo!

 

[Recidiva]

No, but I'll tell you a funny story.


Several months ago I went to see Apocolypto with C. During the movie there was a guy sitting several rows behind us that would scream during every action sequence.

Every time someone would get stabbed or clobbered over the head it was,

"OOOH SHIT!!!"

"BAM, HE TOOK IT!!"


It was unbearable. I sat in my seat steaming like a clam, trying unsuccessfully to ignore the offending patron. As we were leaving the theater I told him his behavior was totally rude and he needed to keep his mouth shut or something like that. I was walking away and he told his girlfriend in a loud voice that he was going to "bitch slap my punk ass."

Well, that was pretty much it. I turned around and slapped him in the face. Soon there was an all out brawl in the hallway of the theater. The other moviegoers seemed quite entertained as we drew a big crowd, theatrically throwing each other over garbage cans and such.

I caught a few glimpses of my beautiful sub C looking at me in disgust while all of this was going on. Normally this would've been fine, but while I was mid-fight with the assclown, his girlfriend was scratching my face and such. During a point where I had gained control of the situation, I asked C to please contain the female, to which she simply shook her head sadly.

Eventually, security approached us with me having the young buster in a headlock and his girlfriend ripping my necklace off. I think if the guard hadn't shown up at that moment, I would've punched his girl right in the face.

Cops came and took our names down, neither of us wanted to press charges and we left peacefully.

C and I had a bit of a discussion over this afterwards. She felt like I was being a child, I felt like she could've at least restrained the female.

Here's my take on this. I don't consider myself a common brawler. I usually sidestep situations like this rather artfully, but every once in a while there is a person who absolutely needs to get their asses kicked. If I make this decision, it would be cool for anyone in service to me to support it.

I'm not asking for her to jump in the dog pile, in fact, I would usually prefer she stay out of it completely, but this was an unusual situation in that I was also being attacked by a girl and I wasn't going to hit the girl.

Probably.

I hate movies where the women sit there and cringe. I'm usually saying "Grab something, hit him! What is with you!"

My husband however would have no problems hitting a girl that hit him first.

I think for us one guy and one girl for him wouldn't be something he'd have a problem with, and wouldn't need my help. He's good with crowds. I'd get in the way. It'd probably be over in a few seconds.

If he were to give a verbal request, that'd be different. But he just moves so damned fast I would just get out of the way.

Now this isn't my general attitude with guys, I've been around guys I've felt I'd have to defend myself. He's just really good at fighting.

Also, online verbally, if we're attacked, we don't generally both jump in to defend the other person. We can make a decent enough showing ourselves. We assume the other person can handle themselves and the insult was a choice to dive in or not. The assumption is you can handle yourself, assistance is voluntary.

 

[minx1]

The more I've read this the thread the more I've realised that for me a Dom with a propensity to fighting would be a complete deal breaker for me. (I don't mean an out of character/one off thing....although I wouldn't like that either if I'm truthful). I'm gonna go add it to the 'dealbreaker' thread lol

I know its each to their own and that for some seeing their Dom in action like that is attractive, but to me its a complete no no and a turnoff, not just sexually, but in general. I don't like violence anyway and I would find it difficult to submit to a man who lacks the self control and the ability to diffuse or deal with a situation in another manner.

 

[BiBunny]

The more I've read this the thread the more I've realised that for me a Dom with a propensity to fighting would be a complete deal breaker for me. (I don't mean an out of character/one off thing....although I wouldn't like that either if I'm truthful). I'm gonna go add it to the 'dealbreaker' thread lol

I know its each to their own and that for some seeing their Dom in action like that is attractive, but to me its a complete no no and a turnoff, not just sexually, but in general. I don't like violence anyway and I would find it difficult to submit to a man who lacks the self control and the ability to diffuse or deal with a situation in another manner.

In my opinion, someone who is pre-disposed to fighting a lot is an immature person. Immaturity is an instant turn-off to me.

 

[minx1]

In my opinion, someone who is pre-disposed to fighting a lot is an immature person. Immaturity is an instant turn-off to me.

yeah me too.

I think DVS also hit the nail on the head for me....

I wonder if I were a female submissive...would I find a man that's so suseptable to a physical fight with someone else, because his emotions were triggered by something the other person said...would I want that man to ever be in control of my emotional and maybe even mental and physical welfare, at such a time when I am not able to do anything about it?

 

[catalina_francisco]

The more I've read this the thread the more I've realised that for me a Dom with a propensity to fighting would be a complete deal breaker for me. (I don't mean an out of character/one off thing....although I wouldn't like that either if I'm truthful). I'm gonna go add it to the 'dealbreaker' thread lol

I know its each to their own and that for some seeing their Dom in action like that is attractive, but to me its a complete no no and a turnoff, not just sexually, but in general. I don't like violence anyway and I would find it difficult to submit to a man who lacks the self control and the ability to diffuse or deal with a situation in another manner.

You're not alone. It has never worked for me in either lifestyle or vanilla situations and to carry Bunny's thoughts on it being immature one step further, I think of it in just the same way for pyl's who think it is tough, macho, or a turn on for their Dom to react in such a way. It always amuses me when people think this is the mark of a truely brave and masculine male....lol, my own father was a quite man, never had a lot to say, didn't drink or smoke, didn't like violence and brutality, and yet I have heard stories of how he went into the front line under fire to rescue comrades in the war, unable to defend himself because his rifle was over one shoulder, the unconcious body of a soldier over the other, and how he continued to do this even when others turned back and said it was too dangerous.

That to me takes a whole lot more guts and is macho and brave, not yelling, calling people out, being abusive and swinging your fist just because you don't like what someone said or did. Shortly before my father's death, I heard of other self sacrificing acts he did as a civilian, yet never did I hear these things from his own mouth...he preferred to keep them to himself and pretend it never happened and if he ever heard someone telling of them, he would do his best to get them to stop talking about it, not with his fists, just a quiet request to please not say any more.

Catalina

 

[graceanne]

I hate movies where the women sit there and cringe. I'm usually saying "Grab something, hit him! What is with you!"

I agree. lol Frankly the only time K gets in fights is with his brother, though, and I'm just flat out sick of them (the fights). I don't know what I'd do in the story about Marquis and C, but if k were in a 'fight to the death' fight-type-thing, I sure as hell wouldn't be ignoring it. First I'd call the police then I'd find something heavy to hit the 'badguy' with.

My husband however would have no problems hitting a girl that hit him first.

Neither would mine. *shrugs*

 

[northwoods_sub]

No, but I'll tell you a funny story.


Several months ago I went to see Apocolypto with C. During the movie there was a guy sitting several rows behind us that would scream during every action sequence.

Every time someone would get stabbed or clobbered over the head it was,

"OOOH SHIT!!!"

"BAM, HE TOOK IT!!"


It was unbearable. I sat in my seat steaming like a clam, trying unsuccessfully to ignore the offending patron. As we were leaving the theater I told him his behavior was totally rude and he needed to keep his mouth shut or something like that. I was walking away and he told his girlfriend in a loud voice that he was going to "bitch slap my punk ass."

Well, that was pretty much it. I turned around and slapped him in the face. Soon there was an all out brawl in the hallway of the theater. The other moviegoers seemed quite entertained as we drew a big crowd, theatrically throwing each other over garbage cans and such.

I caught a few glimpses of my beautiful sub C looking at me in disgust while all of this was going on. Normally this would've been fine, but while I was mid-fight with the assclown, his girlfriend was scratching my face and such. During a point where I had gained control of the situation, I asked C to please contain the female, to which she simply shook her head sadly.

Eventually, security approached us with me having the young buster in a headlock and his girlfriend ripping my necklace off. I think if the guard hadn't shown up at that moment, I would've punched his girl right in the face.

Cops came and took our names down, neither of us wanted to press charges and we left peacefully.

C and I had a bit of a discussion over this afterwards. She felt like I was being a child, I felt like she could've at least restrained the female.

Here's my take on this. I don't consider myself a common brawler. I usually sidestep situations like this rather artfully, but every once in a while there is a person who absolutely needs to get their asses kicked. If I make this decision, it would be cool for anyone in service to me to support it.

I'm not asking for her to jump in the dog pile, in fact, I would usually prefer she stay out of it completely, but this was an unusual situation in that I was also being attacked by a girl and I wasn't going to hit the girl.

Probably.

I probably would have done the samething that C did, my thought would have been more along the lines of who is going to take care of the kids if we are both in jail. Not to mention I am a complete chickenshit, and I would be afraid of being hurt (said the masochist, lol).

I have never been in this kind of situation with my Sir, though there have been times before we were D/s that I would talk him away from a fight. The times that he would be close would generally be in terms of defending the honor of someone weaker than he (such as my sisters) whom he felt the need to protect.
Of course the reason I don't want him to fight are purely selfish. If he is prison for killing some twerp who is not worth his time we would be limited to conjugal visits and that just would not do it for me. lol

 

[3113]

Here's my take on this. I don't consider myself a common brawler. I usually sidestep situations like this rather artfully, but every once in a while there is a person who absolutely needs to get their asses kicked. If I make this decision, it would be cool for anyone in service to me to support it.

Dude! I would have been there for you! No way I'd let any girl scratch up my guy--even if I disapproved of what he was doing.

And thanks so much for the story! Wow. Someone who was really in that kind of situation. I'm sorry that happened to you, but I'm pleased to have a real "been-there-done-that" p.o.v.

 

[3113]

I didn't find it to be very BDSM-y because the guys were supposed to be totally subjugated and weren't, at least the lead male characters weren't, not really.

Shhhh! You're not suppose to notice that--it gets worse in later books. The women "in charge" don't want to be or aren't *really* in charge You start to notice that the men do all the heavy lifting and decision-making even though the women are all suppose to be "queens" who are running the roost.

And really, if you're going to point out that things don't make sense what *are* we going to do with you

 

[minx1]

You're not alone. It has never worked for me in either lifestyle or vanilla situations and to carry Bunny's thoughts on it being immature one step further, I think of it in just the same way for pyl's who think it is tough, macho, or a turn on for their Dom to react in such a way. It always amuses me when people think this is the mark of a truely brave and masculine male....lol, my own father was a quite man, never had a lot to say, didn't drink or smoke, didn't like violence and brutality, and yet I have heard stories of how he went into the front line under fire to rescue comrades in the war, unable to defend himself because his rifle was over one shoulder, the unconcious body of a soldier over the other, and how he continued to do this even when others turned back and said it was too dangerous.

That to me takes a whole lot more guts and is macho and brave, not yelling, calling people out, being abusive and swinging your fist just because you don't like what someone said or did. Shortly before my father's death, I heard of other self sacrificing acts he did as a civilian, yet never did I hear these things from his own mouth...he preferred to keep them to himself and pretend it never happened and if he ever heard someone telling of them, he would do his best to get them to stop talking about it, not with his fists, just a quiet request to please not say any more.

Catalina

yeah I agree Catalina. I would just find it hard to respect someone who was rolling around the floor, brawling lol.
I wouldn't think it was impressive or macho or tough, I'd think it was stupid.

.....and to be honest if he hit a girl, I would be disgusted.