FemDom, Tantric Ritual and Kali

[unpredictablebijou]

I figured you'd enjoy that. Glad to see I'm not off. Well, no more off than usual at least.

Doms, by contrast, may correct my grammar if they are willing to refer to me as Mistress Third-Eye Sadie when they do.... Or send me naked pictures. That's fine too.

Arkhilokus:
I'm still smarting from being called an "ostensible sub", so I'll avoid asking about precise definitions of "religious".

Aw, pauvre petit.

And after all, what does a sub do when offered a challenge like that? It is, I believe, a PYL's job to offer challenges.

As to defining "religious," hell, I don't know. I could derail the thread completely by defining "religion" or I can go with a flexible assumed meaning, a basic connotation that I believe everyone can get a basic handle on. I'd even let you choose, sweetmeat.

Maybe we should go with, "Is God there?" If yes: it's a religious ritual. If no: it's a mundane ritual.

 

[Homburg]

Doms, by contrast, may correct my grammar if they are willing to refer to me as Mistress Third-Eye Sadie when they do.... Or send me naked pictures. That's fine too.

I don't mind breaking rules. Doesn't hurt my psyche at all

Maybe we should go with, "Is God there?" If yes: it's a religious ritual. If no: it's a mundane ritual.

Sounds like an excellent rule of thumb in a delicate situation.

 

[LadyAria]

What a delightful little article!

I must say the ritual of BDSM is one of the appeals to the lifestyle. The act of worship in a ritualized manner can be quite an experience comparable to what many would consider a religious experience. It is a cleansing away and freeing of the mind through the body. I know for me it can be one of the closest moment of absolute zen I may experience in a week. The sense of utter being and doing to feel without thought. It is completely giving over to the moment and an act of utter faith to completely take or give control over a life. Life energy is most scared and the rise and fall of that energy is intoxicating when in a very strenuous and engaging exchange between PYL/pyl. I don't believe is limited to specific genders though it may play on cultural upbringing. I know F/f is just as moving as F/m.

 

[Arkhilokhus]

As to defining "religious," hell, I don't know. I could derail the thread completely by defining "religion" or I can go with a flexible assumed meaning, a basic connotation that I believe everyone can get a basic handle on. I'd even let you choose, sweetmeat.

Your point is well-taken. Not enough hours in the day, I suppose.

Maybe we should go with, "Is God there?" If yes: it's a religious ritual. If no: it's a mundane ritual.

I'll sign on to this.

I intended to meet your challenge of ritual writing, but this night has been one obstacle after another. Is it just me, or is Mercury Retrograde? Mars Transiting, perhaps? Regardless, my energy for sustained argument is all gone, but I'll apply myself tomorrow.

 

[Homburg]

I intended to meet your challenge of ritual writing, but this night has been one obstacle after another. Is it just me, or is Mercury Retrograde? Mars Transiting, perhaps? Regardless, my energy for sustained argument is all gone, but I'll apply myself tomorrow.

No idea about MErcury or Mars, but I'm in much more of a "make silly comments" mood than a discursive one. It's why I've been quiet on this thread.

 

[unpredictablebijou]

... i thought that was aimed at me.

Only in the most amiable sense.

And really, it was aimed at my own Jet, who's been particularly fresh this week. I was just venting. I do hope you don't take that too seriously.

I feel strongly that they are not on the same scale...
but that's all i have on it at the moment; a gut feeling.



Reiki style energy exchanges?

Oh, nice idea! chakra work. Healing work. That sort of thing.

hmm...

i'm remembering something you said earlier, Bijou, in that the "high priestess in the prom dress" is also the one that does all the work.

Is that to keep the mundane details behind such rituals out of sight, thus maintaining the mystery for the flock?

In my vision of it, "the flock" are also encouraged to seek the divine in the mundane tasks necessary to the "maintenance of the temple," much like the wine maker you wrote of before, though i do see how petty realities would get in the way.

No, I wish it were something noble like preserving the majesty of the ritual and all that, but generally the one in the prom dress is doing a lion's share of the work because it needs to be done and no one else is doing it.

But unrelated to that is the fact that there is a great deal of behind-the-scenes stuff that has to be done to present an effective ritual. Mundane tasks, like sweeping the temple and laying out the altar. Ideally there are people helping with that process, but that's not always the case. It is true that that sort of simple task, whoever ends up doing it, offers keys to illumination just as much as, if not more than, the rite itself.

Lets split hairs some more, just cuz;



God is always there. *nods* yup.

Driving to work is not a religious ritual. *confused* It is for me. Every day I get to have direct contact for 25 minutes with a clear vision of the Ten Thousand Things. Very religious.

Your point is well-taken. Not enough hours in the day, I suppose.


I'll sign on to this.

I intended to meet your challenge of ritual writing, but this night has been one obstacle after another. Is it just me, or is Mercury Retrograde? Mars Transiting, perhaps? Regardless, my energy for sustained argument is all gone, but I'll apply myself tomorrow.

As far as I can tell, there has been a stationary Drama Front, which met up with a fast-moving Facetious Irreverence System late last week. The resulting weather has been interesting, to say the least. See below:

No idea about MErcury or Mars, but I'm in much more of a "make silly comments" mood than a discursive one. It's why I've been quiet on this thread.

Yeah, me too.

No reason not to lighten up occasionally. We all need that.

I'm certainly ready to play a bit, as well as work.

 

[Homburg]

Yeah, me too.

No reason not to lighten up occasionally. We all need that.

I'm certainly ready to play a bit, as well as work.

My brain has just been largely offline, punctuated by moments of lucidity and activity.

My brain is on Thursday, and the week and a half following that. My Cock is focusing on it even more seriously.

 

[unpredictablebijou]

My brain has just been largely offline, punctuated by moments of lucidity and activity.

My brain is on Thursday, and the week and a half following that. My Cock is focusing on it even more seriously.

Lemme guess... is there a visit planned? There's generally only one thing Brain and Cock agree on...

 

[Homburg]

Lemme guess... is there a visit planned? There's generally only one thing Brain and Cock agree on...

It's not the only thing agreed upon by both, but, yeah, visit.

 

[unpredictablebijou]

Well w00t for you!

I'm not terribly attached to making this thread live longer than it should, but I feel like there may still be more to say about all this.

Anyone want to talk to the idea that a Domme is a random and illogical force, She Who Must Be Obeyed, and how this characteristic can be positively manifested? Or negatively?

There are portraits of Dakinis that really fit this profile of the Wild but Illuminated Woman - lemme just give you one of the quotes I really like, describing various ways to spot an actual Dakini in the crowd. These are excerpted from translations in the book "Passionate Enlightenment" by Miranda Shaw:

"...women who always speak truthfully and are proud of their strength; women whose minds are powerful and energetic; women who delight in shrewish behavior and speak boastfully; women who are fearless, revel in their own ferocity, and like to eat meat and frequent cemeteries; and women who derive pleasure from the fact that they are untameable..."

further on, there's this:

"[She] cannot be prevented from speaking the truth and always takes delight in the teachings. She is haughty, wealth and domineering and loves to hear news of deaths in battle. Another type is moody, angers at the slightest provocation, likes to argue and is very proud. Another has an unpleasant expression and imperfect features and is exceedingly arrogant.... [these women] are likely to be ferocious, domineering and untameable. There is a complete absence of submissiveness."

One assertion is that women like this may or may not be Dakinis, but basically the behavior is the same either way; in the case of a Dakini she is acting out of pure consciousness, so when she behaves in ways like those described above, she is creating the opportunity for enlightenment.

Before you think this is a big rationalization so I can go round acting like a bitch (okay, maybe it is) there are some very famous stories about these contrary, powerful women and how they create enlightenment.

Case in point: a famous guru was traveling through a town in which a Dakini ran a restaurant. She recognized that he was very close to moksha, but he did not recognize her for what she was. He went into her restaurant and ordered food, but she brought him a bowl of garbage and set it carefully down in front of him. In a very un-yogi-like way, he lost his temper and threw the bowl into the street.

"How can I be expected to eat this garbage?" he shouted.

"How can an epicure expect to reach enlightenment?" she responded.

At that moment, he realized What She Was, prostrated himself and asked her to teach him. She allowed him to work in her restaurant for a couple of years, and shortly after that he attained enlightenment and went on to teach many people.

So. Any thoughts?

 

[Arkhilokhus]

Deida makes a lot out of this, actually. His view is that the kind of wildness you're talking about is an essential part of the Feminine, and that the proper response on the part of those with Masculine sexual essences is to abide in the storm, so to speak, and focus into pure Consciousness.

The story you recounted actually reminds me a lot of the Zen stories, with eccentric Zen masters from all sorts of walks of life. I'm not sure, in other words, that I see any connection to that brand of enlightenment and femaleness or Femininity.

That's not to say that such a conception couldn't be part of a FemDom relationship, with the, ah, emotional wildness being seen as the influence of the Goddess, inviting the male to incarnate Siva in order to weather the storms. It's not to my taste, but I can see how it might be done.

 

[unpredictablebijou]

The story you recounted actually reminds me a lot of the Zen stories, with eccentric Zen masters from all sorts of walks of life. I'm not sure, in other words, that I see any connection to that brand of enlightenment and femaleness or Femininity.

.

Oh quite. Mad randomness is certainly not the exclusive privilege of the female sex, by any means. And yes, many Dakini stories sound a lot like Zen stories.

Only there's more sex in them.

I wish I had time to say more intelligent things, but that must wait til I'm sane.

*years roll by*

 

[Shankara20]

I wish I had time to say more intelligent things, but that must wait til I'm sane.

*years roll by*

that's it - I'm waiting until I'm sane to post here

yup

that works for me
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waiting till I'm sane.....

 

[unpredictablebijou]

.... i thought that's how it Was done. At least for Kali & Siva....




oh.

i understand impermanence & all that... but i kinda like this thread.

Well you're doing your bit to keep it alive. I want that too, but I also don't want to get boring or anything.

As to Kali and Siva, yes, that's sorta how it's done, but only in one view. It isn't that the Goddess gets to just be a raging bitch all day for no reason. But there is a focus (you see it in the descriptions) on the idea that she tells the truth. That's often a harsh act.

She may be a "raging storm" sort of energy, yes, but that's not the only way. Personally, I think Kali's challenges can be very gentle indeed, so long as one acknowledges that they have a certain steel core to them. The whole velvet glove thing.

that's it - I'm waiting until I'm sane to post here

yup

that works for me
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waiting till I'm sane.....

Oh please don't wait. I didn't; I don't have the patience.

What about you, Sri Shankara? Ever wanted to meet Kali?

 

[Shankara20]

What about you, Sri Shankara? Ever wanted to meet Kali?

There was a time I saw myself as in her service willing to die if she required it...




but after years of painful self reflection I saw it as unresolved biological & adoptive mother shit and I got all better.

sorta


more later

 

[SlaveNano]

Rawr.

More personally, can we share some ideas about BDSM rituals in here? Can we invent some, beyond the Kali rite in the original essay? If you were framing that rite, for example, a mystery play concerning Sakti in her aspect as Kali, and Siva as her transformed slave and playtoy, in a ritualized context, what would you do? Would you have an invocation prayer? A form of communion for the congregation? Hymns? Deacons or deaconesses? Perform baptisms?

As promised in an earlier post - here are some thoughts on this. This is my guide to different stages of ritual in BDSM!

INITIATION

Presentation – in which Shiva offers himself to Kali. This might take some form of greeting with a recognised form of words. A tribute might be offered. A gift might be presented to Kali. The gift could be an object, but it might also take the form of something that’s not material.

Supplication – Shiva starts the initial form of surrendering mind and body to Kali. This could take the form of taking a supplication position – kneeling, lying on his front, head being bowed, adopting a position that’s never higher than Kali would all be appropriate forms in a BDSM context. Boot worship is another activity that sits here quite well.

Collaring – a ritual acceptance of servitude. Shiva wears or receives a token of servitude from Kali. This might mean the fitting of a collar, but could equally be some other symbol representing ownership. Collaring could also fit in very well as the climax of ritual in which the final act is acceptance of a physical symbol of servitude.

Cleansing – rituals around purifying body and mind before other activities take place. This might involve ensuring that Shiva has not lustful thoughts for Kali. Water rituals can form part of the purifying process – enforced bathing or washing as part of a preparation. Fire rituals could also be used – hot waxs treatment or any other use of candles or fire in a ritual.

TRIAL

This could take the form of either a punishment or test of dedication/fortitude. Many different activities can form part of the trial and it is here where the Kali Goddess figure exercises the full range of her skill and creativity.

Punishment – This can be at different levels from a relatively mild chastisement to retribution where Kali displays the full force of her anger towards her slave. Kali exercises her full range of powers and ingenuity. Here she will use the full range of her skills combined with the equipment and implements at her disposal to ensure that Shiva is punished appropriately. In a BDSM context this would be any form of physical chastisement, corporal punishment, cock and ball torture, nipple torture.

Test – Kali sets Shiva a task on which he will be judged. This task could be anything – something that is done out of Kali’s presence and brought with him or the imposition of rules whilst in Her presence. Shiva may pass the test and be rewarded or fail and be punished, or there may even be some partial completion so that Kali can reserve further punishment for a later date in retribution for an unfinished task.

Entrapment – Kali sets a test for Shiva that he is bound to fail, something that cannot be achieved to Her satisfaction. Kali might pose a question in a form that, whatever Shiva answers, it will invite reproach. A variation of this would be trial by fate. Kali allows chance to decide Her slave’s fate – use of playing cards or other symbols or random selection of tasks could be used here.

Domestic servitude – Kali uses Shiva to perform whatever domestic duties She requires. Cleaning around the dungeon, polishing Her shoes or any other kind of menial duty.

Restraint - Shiva give up control of his body to Kali. This is, of course, closely allied to giving up control of his mind as well. Activities such as any kind of bondage, wrist and ankle straps, encaging, cling film would fit here.

Offering – Kali gives Shiva up to others. This could mean being given up for use by another Goddess or to other slaves. In a BDSM this could be any form of activity where others are present at a party or at the invitation of Kali. Forced-bi is an activity that fits into this.

Climax – this is where Shiva reaches a point of crisis. It can be brought about by extreme physical pain through punishment and torture, but it can also be brought about by mental anguish through Kali’s manipulation and control of Shiva.

Surrender – this is the point where Shiva completely gives up control to Kali, both physically and mentally. This could take place at any stage of an extended ritual.

RECONCILIATION

Redemption – the point where Kali has punished Shiva and his suffering can mean that he can be absolved of faults. In this mode Kali demonstrates her forgiving and caring side.

Bestowing of gifts – Kali presents Shiva with a token of her satisfaction that he has served well. These need not be something physical, eg it could be the bestowing of a new identity. Rituals such as baptism ceremonies, re-naming ceremonies, granting of new identities would fit here well.

Transformation – a very intense experience, which is likely to be the culmination of several of the different stages in the ritual. A point where Kali brings Shiva to a new realisation of his place through the physical and spiritual experience she has offered him.

Release – Kali and Shiva wind down and Shiva is released from Her presence and the realm of the Goddess back into the other world.

CONCLUSION

Although presented here in a linear way, this should be seen as a menu from which Kali can select. Each individual stage of the ritual can form a complete ‘session’ or period in Kali’s presence. Any one stage or activity could form the basis of a session. For example, I have done sessions that have not gone beyond the ‘presentation’ stage – by reading a story and presenting a gift – and then jumped to reconciliation. The whole cycle presented here might actually be a process that takes place over a long period of time, even years.

I’d add that these stages are probably as relevant to a Mf relationship as a Fm one as I think many female submissives would recognise most of these stages as part of their experience.

The list is not exhaustive – do add your own ideas.

 

[SlaveNano]

Having said that, it does seem like there would be particular techniques for encouraging participants to see the ritual in religious or spiritual or transformative terms. SlaveNano's Goddess is obviously skilled at doing just that, and I wonder how much of her rituals would be effective for someone else. I have a suspicion much of what she does is tailored to his personal psychology (again, feel free to correct me).

You are right, I think this is fair comment. She has the skill to bring about that kind of transformation but there has to be some kind of openess on the part of the slave as well to make that possible. Yes, I think what She does is tailored to the personal psychology of each slave that serves her and that different slaves take different routes. Some may not desire or be ready for an experience that goes beyond the physical. But that is part of a Goddess's skill - using Her intuition and judgement to know where and how far to take a supplicant.

 

[SlaveNano]

Well w00t for you!

Anyone want to talk to the idea that a Domme is a random and illogical force, She Who Must Be Obeyed, and how this characteristic can be positively manifested? Or negatively?

Yes, I can definatley relate to that. I think this is another part of establishing Goddess's 'mystique'. The idea of unpredictablility, capriciousness means that it is impossible for a slave to second guess his mistress however long they have had a relationship for and however close they get. These qualities are a tool for maintaining control. Randomness and unpredictability keep a slave on his toes. You can be severely punished for what seems a minor misdemeanour or forgiven for a major transgression. A slave just has to submit to Her will at the time.

The idea of random force is mirrored in many of the depictions of Kali - in a rage, toungue out, trampling on poor Shiva! Wonderful.

 

[Arkhilokhus]

Yes, I can definatley relate to that. I think this is another part of establishing Goddess's 'mystique'. The idea of unpredictablility, capriciousness means that it is impossible for a slave to second guess his mistress however long they have had a relationship for and however close they get. These qualities are a tool for maintaining control. Randomness and unpredictability keep a slave on his toes. You can be severely punished for what seems a minor misdemeanour or forgiven for a major transgression. A slave just has to submit to Her will at the time.

The idea of random force is mirrored in many of the depictions of Kali - in a rage, toungue out, trampling on poor Shiva! Wonderful.

Having been in relationships when this sort of unpredictability was present in an inferior form as part of my partner's personality, I do have trouble with this idea. And yet...and yet, I do like the way you've phrased this, Nano. And there is this desire to not know what to expect. I can see that very much as a tool to invite submission, as you've said.

But isn't there a sort of conflict with the desire to not know, to be off-balance, and the way that love can make you want to know your beloved? I think there's a tension there, at least as I relate to my own Mistress. I want to know her, as a person, but I also want to feel that sense of being, not inferior necessarily, but in subordination. And that's where the mystique you talk about runs up against my love for her.

 

[eastern sun]

Images of the Leather Church are intoxicating. I would love to worship there.

I imagine being led down a labyrinthine maze of dark narrow passages into the very depths of sacred space where my offering - my body, my voice, my meditative and devotional energies - are given to the Priest or Priestess as a means of manifesting the union of Kali and Shiva.

And I love SlaveNano's ritual post.

But here's where I lose my bearings . . .

As much as I try, I cannot reconcile the extremes of sexual devotion with the goals of a spiritual life. I believe, to the depths of my understanding, that sexual devotion can awaken deep energies. But I cannot believe that the purpose of awakening those energies is to pursue sexual passion.

I understand intellectually the idea that sexual release offers energy to the cosmos. But, honestly, it seems like an all-too-easy way to rationalize lust in all its great and trivial forms.

Most spiritual paths don't include sex at all.

I've heard it said that some Buddhists think tantra is a natural path for Westerners to take because it works with our culture-bound materialism. But that doesn't make me feel any more confident that we aren't using it to support our cravings, and prop up our ignorance with lofty intentions.

I would honestly like to remove this obstacle to my practice. I would like to return to the days I spent in total sexual devotion. But it's difficult to give oneself over completely to the Church (i.e. take those vows as monk or nun), when there are children to take care of and bills to pay.

My husband says, "compartmentalize." In other words, worship in Church and spend the rest of the days taking care of the mundane.

But my approach has always been to practice in the midst of the mundane. Though it has led me to sexual slavery as a lifestyle, I still don't feel like I could be a nun in the Leather Church.

And I want to.

And then I raise one more objection, in my arguments with my own desires.

Monks and nuns throughout the ages have been criticized for placing their own salvation first. For removing themselves from the world at large in order to find liberation, or union with the "God" of their understanding, without benefit to the laymen in their communities.

Would a nun in the Leather Church be like the nun who is fed by her village so that she can pursue her own path to spiritual bliss unimpeded by the trivial and the mundane?

What does she offer the world outside her own body and the body of the Church?

 

[SlaveNano]

Having been in relationships when this sort of unpredictability was present in an inferior form as part of my partner's personality, I do have trouble with this idea. And yet...and yet, I do like the way you've phrased this, Nano. And there is this desire to not know what to expect. I can see that very much as a tool to invite submission, as you've said.

But isn't there a sort of conflict with the desire to not know, to be off-balance, and the way that love can make you want to know your beloved? I think there's a tension there, at least as I relate to my own Mistress. I want to know her, as a person, but I also want to feel that sense of being, not inferior necessarily, but in subordination. And that's where the mystique you talk about runs up against my love for her.

Yes, I think there is a tension here. In lots of ways it suits my personal circumstances to have that element of unpredictability and a clear division between Goddess's world and the other world. I am not in a 24/7 life style relationship with Goddess so I need to compartmentalise the two worlds in my head to make this work for me - so the idea of a Goddess with some inscrutability or unpredictability probably suits me.

Having said that, its hard to put things into compartments and detach yourself from them completely. So, yes, I do feel a conflict. I think the form that takes is the desire to know Godess as a complete person and also the desire to be able to serve her without being hampered by the constraints of the other world against the people you love in that other world. For sure, that can be really hard to reconcile at times and no amount of trying to separate things in your head can resolve that.

 

[unpredictablebijou]

I am off-center today and cannot participate properly in this except to say I'm chewing on what everyone has said, and feeling immensely grateful.

SlaveNano, you in particular: you have created an immensely important framework there, and it will take me quite a while to think about what it all implies in my own beliefs and practices. Just astounding, the work you have done here. I thank you.

I hope to be back tomorrow in better form.

Gratitude. Peace.

 

[Arkhilokhus]

Eastern sun, I don't think I've said this before, but you're a beautiful writer. This post in particular seemed full with feeling.

As much as I try, I cannot reconcile the extremes of sexual devotion with the goals of a spiritual life. I believe, to the depths of my understanding, that sexual devotion can awaken deep energies. But I cannot believe that the purpose of awakening those energies is to pursue sexual passion.

I understand intellectually the idea that sexual release offers energy to the cosmos. But, honestly, it seems like an all-too-easy way to rationalize lust in all its great and trivial forms.

Most spiritual paths don't include sex at all.

I disagree. I think all spiritual paths include sex, but it's non-obvious because most people don't see celibacy and abstinence as sexual acts. I, on the contrary, see them as fundamentally sexual acts. All that energy has to be addressed somehow. And, in fact, I'm unaware of any spiritual system that doesn't address sexuality at all.

I would honestly like to remove this obstacle to my practice. I would like to return to the days I spent in total sexual devotion. But it's difficult to give oneself over completely to the Church (i.e. take those vows as monk or nun), when there are children to take care of and bills to pay.

My husband says, "compartmentalize." In other words, worship in Church and spend the rest of the days taking care of the mundane.

But my approach has always been to practice in the midst of the mundane. Though it has led me to sexual slavery as a lifestyle, I still don't feel like I could be a nun in the Leather Church.

And I want to.

I'm not sure I believe the separation you're giving sexuality and mundane life. Sex is part of mundane life, in my view. It should be spiritualized the same way gardening or doing your taxes is spiritualized. Ultimately, sex is a great source of energy, but not spiritual in and of itself. It is made spiritual by the way we approach it.

 

[eastern sun]

Eastern sun, I don't think I've said this before, but you're a beautiful writer. This post in particular seemed full with feeling.

I disagree. I think all spiritual paths include sex, but it's non-obvious because most people don't see celibacy and abstinence as sexual acts. I, on the contrary, see them as fundamentally sexual acts. All that energy has to be addressed somehow. And, in fact, I'm unaware of any spiritual system that doesn't address sexuality at all.

I'm not sure I believe the separation you're giving sexuality and mundane life. Sex is part of mundane life, in my view. It should be spiritualized the same way gardening or doing your taxes is spiritualized. Ultimately, sex is a great source of energy, but not spiritual in and of itself. It is made spiritual by the way we approach it.

Thank you, Arkhilokhus. And thank you for challenging my statements. I am impressed by the depth of your thinking, and interested in learning from your perspective.

 

[Homburg]

Having been in relationships when this sort of unpredictability was present in an inferior form as part of my partner's personality, I do have trouble with this idea. And yet...and yet, I do like the way you've phrased this, Nano. And there is this desire to not know what to expect. I can see that very much as a tool to invite submission, as you've said.

But isn't there a sort of conflict with the desire to not know, to be off-balance, and the way that love can make you want to know your beloved? I think there's a tension there, at least as I relate to my own Mistress. I want to know her, as a person, but I also want to feel that sense of being, not inferior necessarily, but in subordination. And that's where the mystique you talk about runs up against my love for her.

I have been kicking around some thoughts on this for a bit now, but haven't had the time to get the phrasing I want.

There is a divide between caprice and whim as device, and instability and lack of constancy as personality flaw. If I choose to be capricious because I want my property to be off-balance, that presents an entirely different result in the overall mood and tone than if I am simply battered by the winds of whim at every turn, and incapable of consistency when it is needed.

At its' core, one person uses chaos as a tool. The other is used by their own chaos. The former is in control. The latter is not.

I disagree. I think all spiritual paths include sex, but it's non-obvious because most people don't see celibacy and abstinence as sexual acts. I, on the contrary, see them as fundamentally sexual acts. All that energy has to be addressed somehow. And, in fact, I'm unaware of any spiritual system that doesn't address sexuality at all.


I'm not sure I believe the separation you're giving sexuality and mundane life. Sex is part of mundane life, in my view. It should be spiritualized the same way gardening or doing your taxes is spiritualized. Ultimately, sex is a great source of energy, but not spiritual in and of itself. It is made spiritual by the way we approach it.

Very, very, very good post.