Freakin' good titles!

[karmadog]

re: I bet Senna has no idea

Naw , you didn't do anything wrong. I was just ribbing you a little. The poems trying to blow each other up was a lame reference to Spy vs. Spy which was in Mad magazine when I was a kid. I was trying to say that you know the literary stuff, but where's that pop culture stuff? Just a stupid joke (the kind I'm best at).

 

[Senna Jawa]

Re: Re: Senna Jawa

Originally posted by Senna Jawa One can leave a "keep my title as is" note in the small submission window meant for notes to the editor.Best regards,

It didn't help. Brackets in my titles were left intact till May 17, and removed from newer submissions (regardless of my notes explaining their meaning) starting May 24. Oh, well.

 

[WickedEve]

My Happy, Bandana Dog, I Love You
A pantoum by Judo, with a catchy title.

 

[Senna Jawa]

This title is fun, and there is or could be emotion in it too (imagine that it was voiced in a conversation):

  I am not my fathers Oldsmobile by smithpeter.

BTW, there was a post on General Board, in thread "1000th Post.. Title Suggestions..", by   Dixon Carter Lee,   which had just this one phrase (suggestion?):

            Not your father's Oldsmobile

as the total contents of his post.

Regards,

 

[smithpeter]

Hey, I remember that.

"It's not your father's Oldsmobile"
was an advertising slogan in the 70's.
Had something to do with cars.
Or chewing tobacco.
A maven of lit thought it was particularly spiffy.
Elda Furry went on to great things.
She is now the shadow president of the United States of America.

 

[karmadog]

You might have noticed...

... that the same names keep showing up in this thread. I swear I have no axe to grind, no particular poets to promote, and no sensatol. I actually make an honest effort not to look at who the author of a poem is. Sometimes I notice, but try to wipe it from my mind while thinking about the title.

(At first glance, I thought JUDO's poem was "Mr. Happy Banana Dog... I definitely took a closer look at that! Is it something like a wiener dog, but yellow?)

Stripping Bark by WickedEve
http://www.literotica.com/stories/showstory.php?id=49714

Eve is back with more good stuff. This reminded me of a strip club in a town near me. Unfortunately, I went there once when I was extremely drunk. Sometimes they bark, sometimes they oink, but they couldn't get anywhere near MY lap.

Farmer’s Pussy by WickedEve
http://www.literotica.com/stories/showstory.php?id=49933

My grandfather was a Farmer, but to the best of my knowledge, he did not have a pussy. At least I hope not.

FuckDoll by FuckDoll http://www.literotica.com/stories/showstory.php?id=49919

This is a hell of a poem all things considered. It has an airy feel, but the longer it sits around the staler it gets. There is little movement, yet it vibrates around me. There seems to be three ways to enter this poem, but a little help might be necessary to get fully into it.

Posterior Sacrifice by FuckDoll
http://www.literotica.com/stories/showstory.php?id=49918

Did you ever read that book about the soccer team that crashed in the Andes? This has nothing to do with that, thank God.

Tasteless Purity by Smaugfire
http://www.literotica.com/stories/showstory.php?id=49789

I'll have a Scotch and Tasteless Purity, please.

Office Monkey by Smaugfire
http://www.literotica.com/stories/showstory.php?id=49790

I wish I had an office monkey. He could play the accordion, fetch supplies, make drinks, rub my temples, correct my spelling and grammar, and eat my banana dog.

 

[JUDO]

My Happy, Bandana Dog, I Love You
A pantoum by Judo, with a catchy title.

Thanks, Wicked. I love my dog. He's furry-faced, cuddly and at eleven years old still loves to play 'catch me, catch me' in the house.

It's not a banana dog that looks like a weiner, KD. Interesting imagery - has your therapist pointed out that latency to you yet?

 

[karmadog]

Naw, I had to quit going. He wouldn't let me smoke cigars in his office.

 

[karmadog]

Scary, but there were quite a few good titles today. So here they are.

And still soldiers are born by Lauren.Hynde
http://www.literotica.com/stories/showstory.php?id=50051

I live near several military bases, and they are populated mostly with great people, but I'm not sure they aren't hatched.

Black Capped Chickadee by Rybka
http://www.literotica.com/stories/showstory.php?id=50015

I would never have thought of writing a poem about these birds, but say that title. Fun isn't it? Black capped chickadee! Black capped chickadee! Wheee.

haiku in a hole by karmadog http://www.literotica.com/stories/showstory.php?id=50050

What the hell does that mean? He keeps them in his butt or nostril? More like "haiku BY a hole".

Listen to Some Opera Naked by Solar Dragon
http://www.literotica.com/stories/showstory.php?id=50079

I tried this once--the snooty bastards at the Met had me arrested. The drinks are overpriced there, too.

I Slept Here Once by Lilith1968
http://www.literotica.com/stories/showstory.php?id=49961

This one is about George Washington pointing out all of the bed and breakfasts he once slept at. I slept here, and here, and here. Ok, I slept there twice. You should have seen the chambermaid! She loved it when I took out my dentures. Woohoo!

Twister Sisters by WickedEve
http://www.literotica.com/stories/showstory.php?id=50001

I thought I might get through one of these without WEve sneaking in. Ah well. It's impossible for me to see this title without thinking of three (or four) black women playing Wesson Oil twister. Just the thought of it makes me moan. Really, I'll just sit in the corner and spin the spinner and call out the colors. Promise (fingers crossed behind back).

 

[Lauren Hynde]

Thank you for mentioning my poem, karmadog

I feel like an intruder, though, because And still soldiers are born is untitled... that's the first line of the poem, not the title (the bastards removed the brackets)...

Of course, if you wanted to mention me (get ready for the blatant self-promotion), I also submitted Comfortably Numb, HOW TO write a pantoum, I'm In My Shadow, Ko-Imari and Meteorological Report today...

 

[WickedEve]

Karmadog

Thanks to your thread, I think we're seeing more original titles.

Hey, didn't you like Crazy Criminal Love? lol

You actually have me thinking harder when it comes to my titles!

WE

 

[Lauren Hynde]

Eve's right

I even did research to name Ko-Imari, so I'm a bit disapointed you didn't mention it (but seeing I did it twice already, my pain is diminishing)

 

[WickedEve]

Eve's right

I even did research to name Ko-Imari, so I'm a bit disapointed you didn't mention it (but seeing I did it twice already, my pain is diminishing)

LOL

Ko-Imari
There's one more mention for you. I hope I eased your suffering, Lauren.

 

[karmadog]

I can't say why, but "Ko-Imari" (the title) did not blow my skirt up. I wonder how much trouble you are going to have with people arguing that it is not poetry. I myself am none too sure. However, it is beautifully written.

But I had meant to include...

Crazy Criminal Love by WickedEve http://www.literotica.com/stories/showstory.php?id=50039

This is a poem about the guys in the big house who actually like bending over to pick up the soap. Which reminds me of the paratroop recruit who told his father how he had frozen at the door of the plane and couldn't jump. The instructor had told him that if he didn't jump he would shove his dick up his ass. The father asked if he jumped. The son replied, "Just a little at first."

 

[WickedEve]

But I had meant to include...

Crazy Criminal Love by WickedEve http://www.literotica.com/stories/showstory.php?id=50039

This is a poem about the guys in the big house who actually like bending over to pick up the soap. Which reminds me of the paratroop recruit who told his father how he had frozen at the door of the plane and couldn't jump. The instructor had told him that if he didn't jump he would shove his dick up his ass. The father asked if he jumped. The son replied, "Just a little at first."

Speaking of ass, you crack me up, KD! lol

 

[Lauren Hynde]

I can't say why, but "Ko-Imari" (the title) did not blow my skirt up. I wonder how much trouble you are going to have with people arguing that it is not poetry. I myself am none too sure. However, it is beautifully written.

Actually you're the first person to but that in doubt, everyone else so far has been telling me it's the best and most complex poem I've ever written. But who am I to judge, I just write the stuff...

 

[Rybka]

Prose or Poetry

Because of you L.H. I just submitted a piece of "poetrized" prose called Stripers And The Strega Kid . Maybe it will show up tomorrow.

Rybka

 

[karmadog]

OK, back with some more great titles. There are a lot of them, so let's get right to it.

Ode to a Purple Elephant by Rybka http://www.literotica.com/stories/showstory.php?id=50093

It's unusual when what I expect the title to refer to actually IS what it refers to. More or less. I have been suffering my own case of the bizarre elephant visions, and I was seeing purple rather than pink elephants, but I was seeing them through a pair of blue tinted sunglasses.

Companion Passing by Lady_J
http://www.literotica.com/stories/showstory.php?id=50135

This poem is not funny. It's very serious, still I can't help myself. Did you ever hear the one about the idiot who went to try out for the football (American style)? The coach asked him if he could pass the football, and he replied, "If I can eat it, I can pass it." I know, it's not that funny, but I've eaten plenty of women, and they've never caused a blockage.

My Hot Wet Tight Pussy by Lauren.Hynde
http://www.literotica.com/stories/showstory.php?id=50294

This poem is illustrated with a photograph (that ought to increase the views). But seriously, doesn't it sound like Lauren is bragging, here? Actually, I find it refreshing. It's always guys talking about how enormous their weasel is, and from what my female friends say, that's almost never true. That's why I always say mine is the size of a peanut. That way a woman can never be anything but pleasantly surprised. Of course then they assume I'm a damn liar, but they usually do that anyway.

I don’t want hugs by Silverluna
http://www.literotica.com/stories/showstory.php?id=50136

Me neither. I want Hot Wet Tight Pussy. Or a blowjob. Or a spanking. I mean, who am I? Ziggy?

Stripers And The Strega Kid by Rybka http://www.literotica.com/stories/showstory.php?id=50201

I have to admit that I read this poem thinking that it read "Strippers...", still it was pretty good. Although I never did figure out if the Strega Kid was a witch or a drinker of Italian brandy. That stuff is...

Vicious Bitter by karmadog http://www.literotica.com/stories/showstory.php?id=50316

[insert shameless plug here]

my blade my friend by NeOn_xtc
http://www.literotica.com/stories/showstory.php?id=50221

A Poem by Travis Bickle

difficult poems by Senna Jawa
http://www.literotica.com/stories/showstory.php?id=50320

Truth in advertising.

Streetcar Islands [the streets] by Senna Jawa
http://www.literotica.com/stories/showstory.php?id=50322

I hate when my streetcar runs aground on one of these things. Damn those city sirens with their short skirts and fishnet hose. Where is my beeswax when I need it?

chocolate afflicted by daughter
http://www.literotica.com/stories/showstory.php?id=27999

I was chocolate afflicted just last night. The Wings had lost in overtime and I needed comfort food. There's this Ben and Jerry's flavor. Chocolate with chunks of brownies and chocolate chip cookie dough. I went into sugar shock and didn't wake up until now.

harlequin: sista style by daughter
http://www.literotica.com/stories/showstory.php?id=28105

Did you know that in Old French, "harlequin" means "demon". Doesn't have anything to do with the poem, just interesting. Actually, I was expecting some sort of bodice ripper with whoever is the black Fabio on the cover. Just what I found. Kidding, of course.

The Revolution in Focus by JUDO
http://www.literotica.com/stories/showstory.php?id=50259

Nothing worse than a blurry revolution. They're all blurry to me since I lost my glasses.

Sex over breakfast by Sweetwood
http://www.literotica.com/stories/showstory.php?id=50381

I'd take sex over breakfast, too. Or is it over, as in above. Oh lord, what's that in my eggs?

cork conundrum by OT http://www.literotica.com/stories/showstory.php?id=50391

I know a conundrum. What's the difference between a woman in church and a woman in the tub. A woman in church has hope in her soul.

Double Headed Dildo by smithpeter
http://www.literotica.com/stories/showstory.php?id=50287

Should a nun be writing about these things. I think it's just the smack talking.

Cold Basement by RookArthur
http://www.literotica.com/stories/showstory.php?id=50280

I think this is where radon's daughters live.

No Doors by YIX http://www.literotica.com/stories/showstory.php?id=50375

I thought YIX was the pseudonym of a bartender I used to know. Everytime someone went to play the jukebox, she would yell, "No Doors".

I doubt I had much to do with it, but there are really getting to be a lot of great titles on the list. I read that Hollywood produces something like 20,000 scripts a year. You'd think they could come up with something new. I think they should talk to some of you. smithpeter in particular. I would go to a movie about a heroin addicted nun and her double-headed dildo in a heartbeat.

 

[Lauren Hynde]

Yay!!!

I'm so glad you liked My Hot Wet Tight Pussy!!!

OK, let's set this thing straight: This is not a poem. It's a sociological experiment of the utmost importance... It was designed to see if how many views a title can get! I'm just sorry those guys cut the beginning of the title (it was supposed to read "~~~My Hot Wet Tight Pussy")

And I can't take credit, the author of this title was WickedEve. Sweetwood helped me too. And I should apologize to Senna Jawa for having hijacked his How Popular R U? thread, but I'm really not sorry I did it, so I won't.


(I think Companion Passing is a too serious and certainly too meaningful poem to Lady_J for you to be fiddling like that with it)

 

[Senna Jawa]

Streetcar Islands [the street's] by Senna Jawa
http://www.literotica.com/stories/showstory.php?id=50322

I hate when my streetcar runs aground on one of these things. Damn those city sirens with their short skirts and fishnet hose. Where is my beeswax when I need it?

   

STREETCAR ISLANDS   is the title of my series of poems about Warsaw. The poem mentioned by U (thank U ) doesn't have a title. It only starts with the words   the street's dust etc.

(On Redfrog U had place to state not only the title but also another one for what Iwo Gajda called volume, e.g. I had volumes Nocturns, Streetcar Island), and so on).

BTW, Karmadog, do U really prefer posting links the way U do, rather than as follows:

  {url=http://www.literotica.com/stories/showstory.php?id=50322}Streetcar Islands{/url}

But replace braces { } by square brackets [ ]. The suntax is:

    {url=...}link_name{/url}

so that the result looks as follows:

  Streetcar Islands

But if U prefer it your way then by all means, don't pay any attention to me.

Regards,

 

[karmadog]

re: Lauren and SJ

Lauren, you're right it is a very serious poem and I considered not making a joke, but I cannot help it. I joke about everything. Then I considered not mentioning it, but really the title is very good and I liked the poem very much. Also, I suspect that many of these poems are very important and close to the poet's heart.

Perhaps I should not joke at all? That has been suggested to me. At my grandfather's funeral (my first), I asked my dad why they always played such awful depressing music at funerals. Of course, I had never been to a funeral before, so I was speaking from ignorance (another habit), but my dad said that they played music that the deceased enjoyed during life. So I said, "Does that mean they'll be playing the Bay City Rollers (the NSync of the '70s) at my sister's funeral?"

Clearly not wanting to be reminded of her mortality at such a time, she nearly killed me.

I guess I'm just saying that everything is or becomes funny to me sooner or later. We were made in God's image (supposedly) so God must have a sense of humor, too. If you don't believe me, look around the next time you're on a bus.

SJ, I post the links the way I do because I am an ignorant bastard. Perhaps with your help I can remove the first part of that sobriquet.

Like this? Nope. Like this? : Vicious Bitter by karmadog

[shameless plug redux]

 

[karmadog]

Cool! I'm a computer genius! kinda

 

[Senna Jawa]

Re: re: Lauren and SJ

Originally posted by karmadog SJ, I post the links the way I do because I am an ignorant bastard. Perhaps with your help I can remove the first part of that sobriquet.

U know, there is that Naughtynian Law of Ignorance+Bastardness preservation.

Like this? Nope. Like this? : Vicious Bitter by karmadog

Yes. Or still tiny better:

    Vicious Bitter   by   Karmadog

See the diff?

Best regards

 

[Lauren Hynde]

Re: re: Lauren and SJ

Perhaps I should not joke at all? That has been suggested to me.

Please don't change, we like just the way you are. Don't mind me. In this specific case I know more than you and said more than I should. Disregard what I've said before...

 

[Senna Jawa]

Re: Re: re: Lauren and SJ

Please don't change, we like just the way you are. Don't mind me. In this specific case I know more than you and said more than I should. Disregard what I've said before...

I second the motion, don't change. KarmaDOG, don't be pussy.

Regards,