Freakin' good titles!

[Senna Jawa]

Re: Yay!!!

[...] I should apologize to Senna Jawa for having hijacked his How Popular R U? thread, but I'm really not sorry I did it, so I won't.

Lauren, U so generously gave your Hot Wet Tight Pussy to all of us that nobody has any right to complain, and I would be the last anyway .

Enjoy and let us continue enjoying your royal gesture (Catherine II, the Great, comes to my mind, ooh! ),

 

[Sweetwood]

cool way to post

Let me try this:

shamelessly using this to promote myself

The lusting shadow of my being by Sweetwood

Lets see how this turns out

Sweetwood

 

[karmadog]

First of all: if I offended Lady_J, I'm terribly sorry. It wasn't my intent.

Now. I'm going to try to keep up with the new titles a little better. There are just too many good ones to let the thread go for a couple of a days.

Punctuate Me, Baby! by
JUDO

But she needs more than a comma, boys.

The lusting shadow of
my being by Sweetwood

This one might be about shadow puppets, but every time I try to use my lusting shadow,
all I can make is Florida. Or a rhino horn. I can make a bull if I use two lamps. Look! A
bunny! Wanna see it hop?

Paris without choice by
Sweetwood

And I had heard that Parisian waiters were becoming much nicer. Now they're not even bringing MENUS?!?

stalemate by OT

I'm hoping there is a whole series with this. Checkmate. Castle. Pawn. Bishop (well, maybe not bishop. I think that poem might violate the age restrictions). Maybe he could add Mexican standoff. All even after nine. Extra periods. Tied at the end of regulation.

At the end of the Day by
Tommy Bahama

Just because it's the title of an old Kinks song that I like.

Ode to a Vulva by Lady_J

Kneel when you recite that!

It’s Wednesday Night,
Let’s Fuck! by Lady_J

Crap! It's Thursday. Just my freakin' luck.

small tokens strung
together by smithpeter

Let me get this straight. He's a heroin addicted, landscaping, potentially violent nun, with a thing for dildoes, and now he plays slot machines, too? Next thing you know we'll find out he's been using collection money to play poker with. Ah well, it's still a relatively small scandal for the Church.

Do you guys read the poems that I post? I know some of them get mentioned in the "New poems thread" and a couple others, but I just hope this gets some poems read.

'Til next time, Go Wings!!!

 

[Sweetwood]

Parisiean Waiters and other shadowy figures

Uhm, thanks for the mention Karmadog.

I had thought of Paris who had to make the choice between Helena the beautiful woman from Troy and Athena the Greek Goddess of War and when he made the wrong choice (Helena)Troy got seriously clubbed. And with a wooden horse of all things.

The lusting shadows, would not be fingerpuppets but rather "light induced penis representations on the emotional canvas of a unique human being". Florida, interesting choice! Something like hanging out over the big blue yonder.

In any event I enjoyed your comments.

Thanks

Sweetwood

 

[Lady_J]

Thanks for the mentions, whether good or bad.
I don't take offense at the "Companion Passing" remark, although I'd love to see you try to squeeze an 8 pound cat-log. I think it would be akin to giving birth.

Mr. Knightly was my baby, and I miss him, but I'm not immune from humor.

p.s. Lauren, I love you, thanks for sticking up for me!

pps. Yes, "Ode to a Vulva" must be said on bended knee thrice daily for best results.

 

[karmadog]

re: an 8 lb cat log

Sheesh, I don't think that would be a pretty sight for anyone.

I am sorry for your loss. Believe me, I can relate. I'm reaching the point, (most of my friends are and have been older than me) that the obits are no stranger. And of course, I have lost some pets over the years.

All mentions here (with the possible exception of "I pooed") are all positive. If I mention a poem, it is because I like the title. In almost every case, I also like the poem. I liked all of yours, and quite frankly I found companion passing very touching.

 

[Lady_J]

Aww, thanks.

p.s. Is your av your doggie? What a cutie!

 

[smithpeter]

KD

Thank you for your kind words. Wait a min, what kind words?!?!
Oh well.
You can hear a reading of this poem by downloading the link below.
http://www.sexlacious.com/~smithpeter/audio/smalltokens.mp3

 

[karmadog]

Lady_J: Yeah, that's my bitch. Whenever anyone asks her breed, I just say she's a one-eyed gutter slut. She was left on my doorstep five, six years ago, and she is the joy of my life. Sad, but true. But then again, not.

smithpeter, great reading. I'll never call you a nun again. Landscaping smackslut, maybe. But never again a nun. Despite your habit.

 

[karmadog]

Woo hoo!!!

I'm in a great mood today. Did anyone see the Wings game? I knew they just made 'em mad in Game one.

Sweet Sucksess by
Cuntrygyrl

I've always thought it should be spelled that way. Both of 'em.

Lite Verse, BC by
wordsmithe

Poetry from Lasceaux.

Pound of Flesh by
Bloodypaperdoll

Her profile claims she is a 42F. That's gotta be more than a pound. Each.

polynomials by
Senna Jawa

Crap. Not algebra again. I already passed it. Tough eatin'. Easy passin'

coffee ‘ku by
Senna Jawa

I can't wait for "pool 'ku", "barbie 'ku", "fung 'ku", and "fah 'ku".

woman from
infinity by smithpeter

On your date, you might want to go to the Restaurant at the End of the Universe.

Mad Woman of Pig
Hollow by WickedEve

This can't possibly be autobiographical. Can anyone picture Eve being from a place called "Pig Hollow"?

Let Me Out Of This
Box! by WickedEve

Let me into that box! As long as it isn't a pig hollow. But we know it isn't. Her AV, very kindly, takes it off for us.

 

[Senna Jawa]

Re: Woo hoo!!!

polynomials... by
Senna Jawa

Crap. Not algebra again. I already passed it. Tough eatin'. Easy passin'

One gets more from this poem when one knows who Evariste Galois was and about his story.

coffee ‘ku by
Senna Jawa

I can't wait for "pool 'ku", "barbie 'ku", "fung 'ku", and "fah 'ku".

Title   coffe 'ku, as the note below my poems states, belongs to Kim S. Hodges. There was a tradition in the haiku spheres and circles of having titles for haiku series' like winterku and similar. And the late, wonderful Internet poet Michael McNeilley came up with Turdku, and wrote several of them (uck, fooyee! I was not fond of this particular invention by mcn ).

Regards,

 

[WickedEve]

Re: Woo hoo!!!

Mad Woman of Pig
Hollow by WickedEve

This can't possibly be autobiographical. Can anyone picture Eve being from a place called "Pig Hollow"?

Let Me Out Of This
Box! by WickedEve

Let me into that box! As long as it isn't a pig hollow. But we know it isn't. Her AV, very kindly, takes it off for us.

Someone else wrote the first stanza of Mad Woman Of Pig Hollow, and sent it to me. I thought it had potential to make an interesting poem, so I went with the madness.

Let me out of this box was written on the way to the doctor yesterday. (Not my gyn.)

 

[karmadog]

Not very many new poems today, so I'm afraid I have to mention a pet peeve first. There is a poem called "Your the one". I hope I don't have to point out to you why this title is awful. MY the one? In fact when in doubt about whether or not you should use the word "your", replace it with "my". If it makes sense, you probably did the right thing, if it sounds ridiculous, you didn't. This poet didn't.

Now for the good ones.

bachelor treehouse
by smithpeter

Bart Simpson is all grown up.

My Hot Portuguese
Bitch by Lady_J

I admit it. I mostly looked because I thought it was about Lauren (even though I would never call her a bitch). Actually, the only Portuguese woman I ever met in the real world was a bitch, but she was only half Portuguese, so I suspect the bitchiness came from the other half.

Home Schooling For
The Dead by RisiaSkye

My favorite title for the day.

9-10 AM Rigor Mortis

10-11 AM Decay--Worms and microorganisms

11-12 PM Stench

12-1 PM Lunch

1-2 PM Advanced Decay

As usual, scrub your lobes, making sure to reach behind your cerebellum, before reading the poems.

GO REDWINGS!!!!!

 

[WickedEve]

Karmadog

Those were the same 3 that caught my attention. It's hard to pass up a poem with those kind of titles.
Karma, I love this thread. I always check it out every day.

 

[karmadog]

Thanks

Thanks, for reading this, Eve. I realize it's kind of redundant to point out the poems with the good titles because they are the ones that catch people's eyes already. But I'm having so much fun with this thread that I can't quit. Plus if I stop just analyzing the first line (title), I'll have to start doing whole poems. I'm just not deep enough for that!

 

[RisiaSkye]

Home Schooling For
The Dead by RisiaSkye

My favorite title for the day.

Wow...thanks, karma! I think this is my first ever appearance on this list. (Though I read it often...I too am often snared by titles.)

9-10 AM Rigor Mortis

10-11 AM Decay--Worms and microorganisms

11-12 PM Stench

12-1 PM Lunch

1-2 PM Advanced Decay

This just cracked me up so much that I had to let you know. Not *quite* what I had in mind, but funny nonetheless. Thanks for the chuckle.

 

[Lady_J]

I thank you, and my hot Portuguese bitch thanks you. She didn't like one of my poems, so I wrote one I knew she'd love.
Well, I don't know if she loves it yet. *crosses fingers*

 

[JUDO]

Re: Karmadog

Karma, I love this thread. I always check it out every day.

I love this thread, too, but you know, this morning I started pulling on it and wouldn't you know it, my poems unraveled. I'll never get those things back together. I got adverbs and adjectives lying all over the place. I mean, I think it's a dangling modifier, but I'm just not sure any more. Good God, what a mess.

 

[karmadog]

I'm a little drained after one of the longest hockey games of my life, but the right team one (unless you're from Raleigh).

There are some new (to this thread, anyway) poets today.

Portable Sex by
Nebula33

On sale at this store

Things I Want You To
Teach Me by Owlyn

See response to Home Schooling For
The Dead by RisiaSkye

I bet pot by
nakedangelina

I'll see your pot, and raise you Turkish hash. And my pants. Ha! What's she going to bet now. Angelina's naked! Hee hee hee!

Lovers, After the Bobbit
Trials by Owlyn

You should feel fortunate if you can make love at all after Bobbit's trials.

SEE SEA-RIDER
by Rybka

See SeaDoo go. See SeaDoo crash into marker buoy. See SeaDoo sink. See karmadog eaten by a shark. See karmadog's scraps devoured by blue crabs. See blue crabs on menu at Lil Ray's. Order them, they'll be good anyway.

 

[Rybka]

See Sea-Rider

K-Dog,
See Sea-Rider actually comes from the song C C Rider . A traditional R & B song I always liked.

"C C Rider, now see what you done done
Made me love you, now your man done gone
Made me love you, now your man done gone

I'm gonna buy me a pistol, long as I am tall
I'm gonna kill that woman, catch that old cannonball
I'm gonna kill that woman, catch that old cannonball

I'm gonna leave on Wednesday, won't be back till Saturday night
I'm gonna leave on Wednesday, won't be back till Saturday night
And if my women don't treat me right, I won't be back at all

C C Rider, where you been all night?
C C Rider, where you been all night?
Well your head's all messed up and your pants don't fit you right

And now mamma, I can't stand it no more
Mamma, I can't stand it no more
I get so strange peeking through the keyhole in your door"

Regards, Rybka

 

[karmadog]

Yeah, I kinda figured that, but I couldn't think of anything funny to say with that reference. Plus, I was thinking about going crabbing this weekend, but the weather is kind of iffy.

 

[nakedangelina]

[I bet pot by
nakedangelina

I'll see your pot, and raise you Turkish hash. And my pants. Ha! What's she going to bet now. Angelina's naked! Hee hee hee!


ROTFLMAO!!!
karmadog, you are too much.
and now that your pants are off.....

hehehehe

 

[JUDO]

(*Whew!*) Nice new AV, nakedangelina! Is it getting hot in here? I know I feel damp.

 

[nakedangelina]

(*Whew!*) Nice new AV, nakedangelina! Is it getting hot in here? I know I feel damp.

(*wicked grin*) Thanks, Judo. If you need cooling off, you know where to find me...

 

[karmadog]

Tired, but I can't sleep

I threatened earlier to go to the big poetry list to find some poems with good titles. I did it, and I'll never do THAT again.

First I went to non-erotic and clicked on the story spinner. About twenty times before something that sounded good came up. wouldn't you know it, I'd already featured it on this list. Twenty more clicks, and up popped this one:

zen sucking by smithpeter

I should have expected that it would be something by sp or WE or LH or anyone who shows up here often. This is what girls promise me in bars. They tell me to go home and imagine that they are sucking me. Ha! Jokes on them. I meditate good.

Then I went to erotic and clicked and clicked and clicked... The truth is that most of these titles are awful. Worse even than the titles in non-erotic. I found a lot of titles that I could say something funny about, others were funny on their own. I don't even think they were supposed to be, but I didn't read them because they really weren't that good, and I'm tired. It takes a lot to please me when I'm this tired.

Bald Plains by J Monty

No full monty jokes coming from me. Promise. I have to admit that leaves me almost nothing funny to say. The poem is apparently about a bald man eating a shaven pussy. No kidding.

"On the bald plains of the Southern Hemisphere
where the vegetation was cut away
I explored with my own smoothness..."

Later

"...the bald earth however created an excitement
like no other
and a place where the hairless longbranch
soon will visit again
in my mind, of passion "

I can't top that. I hope Monty intended that to be at least a little funny.